For clarification on the whole social question I used to be out with different friends and friend groups almost 100% of my free time until I realized I put way too much effort and love into my friendships and most of my friends were a lot more superficial and just about having a good time with anybody and doing something, basically I realized I was the one putting way more effort in with pretty much everyone (being more real and getying to them more in a way that positively affected their lives) and yea that made me friends who would literally die for me and become my caregiver if something were to ever happen but it also gave me a complex because I pick up on too many things and I do have that sort of drive to immerse myself and help people so overall it’s just a better time for me if I chill out and say no more and do my own thing. I’m not the kind of person who gets lonely. My girlfriend is all I need, especially now with social media an Internet culture. Friendships online are far more manageable and not at all imposing. When I was a young child I definitely felt abandoned a lot so I learned how to love myself and entertain myself, and ever since then, alone time is just most enjoyable because it’s rare compared to the chasm of it I used to be living in. Idk it’s hard to explain. But I am definitely social around people. I’m not a grump and I’ll strike up a convo with anyone and connect very easy. People want to hang out with me, they want me to be more in their lives. I’ve become very good at saying no thank you. I’d just much prefer to be sitting alone somewhere doing my own thing (like writing or reading or exerxisin or watching something). Even in school I leaned toward the more individualistic team activities where you’re really only trying to better yourself (like swimming and playing an instrument). So, it’s a very hard question to answer in short. Am I capable of being social and am I social often: yes. Do I prefer being social? Not so much. I prefer a few really strong relationships and a lot of me time.
