#scratchpaper02

And once again, the lightning has struck I don’t even know how the fuck All I know is that I shouldn’t be like this Just because of the fact that she could be your first kiss

No Chi, this is gonna be easy, for it’s just an admiration Oh who am I kidding? For me, this is a huge devastation Although it has been just 2 months since the day I liked him, And even though it’s just a mutual understanding, my world is starting to dim

As the raindrops started to pour down

It’s slowly getting painful than it sounds

The more that it turns into a storm

The more that I miss the feeling of being warm

When it rains, the raindrops dagger my skin 

The heart that was once full of love, became paper thin

The puddles formed, slipping me every time I pass by

The way it still affects me, no matter how hard I try

The raindrops have always been you and her

The puddles are formed, by who we were

The fog covering my tear-stained face

Blinds my eyes, that were once the focus of your gaze

I hate it every time it rains, 

Seems like it brought nothing to me, but pain

At least there’s already nothing for me to look forward to

It started that summer with a blue cloud behind the lighting

A message appeared, and my phone started blinking

Surprised at first, for we weren’t that close before

But that all changed when we talked about so much more

Had a lot of crazy talks, especially about her

For you were color blind, and to you, she was the only right color

I felt nothing before, Friendship was probably the only exception

But as the seasons changed, Friendship developed into an infatuation

Whether I reveal or keep my secret as far as I can take

In the end, it’s still going to be me, being attended for a wake

But just in case I live, I hope we could still be friends

Two lovers who are still holding on 

Thinking of each other from dusk till dawn

Trying to move on from the past they shared

I’m sure they’re just surprised, or somehow scared

One simply wants to pursue his education

An excuse unacceptable for their situation

The other trying to escape from her own feelings

Telling herself to have her own beginnings

These two lovers are quite pitiful to look at

But I know for sure, their love story won’t simply end with that

And even if it kills me to see them together again,

I had a breakdown last Friday

It was a move that lead me astray

I couldn’t retain the image of how it occurred

All I know was, my mind saw images with complete blur

Maybe he pulled the trigger

Maybe it was the lessons that are getting harder

Maybe I’m not strong enough to face everything

Or maybe it’s just my weaknesses speaking

It doesn’t matter who or what pulled the trigger

I just need to find the solution one way or another

I should not lose control of my grip

These days, I haven’t been sleeping

I’d just stay awake, and I’ll be grieving

When you were gone, it was a suffering

But then I’ll have to stop, for it’s just a feeling

You’d walk me home late, even at day

Wishing I could make you feel the sane way

I hope you could see what I an seeing

But then I thought, “Oh, it’s just a feeling”

Remembering the days I try so hard not to weep

Despite all the secrets from you, that I had to keep

it shows too much of me, it’s really annoying

Then I remembered, it is what I’m feeling

Every single day, I try so hard to forget

I keep telling myself, that this, I won’t regret

i guarantee this sorrow, will never be ending

I look at the sky as if I’m looking for something

But at the same time, it seems like it already has everything

I look at the sky, and I feel contented

In some ways, I don’t feel so conflicted

I look at the sky, in times when I need answers

Answers that do not answer my questions, but leads me further

I have thousands of reasons why I choose to look at the sky