So neighbors started setting off fireworks last night after they watched evening news. Not just one neighbor. Multiple neighbors. Not the sparkly fireworks. The whistling Pete’s and firecrackers. Noise did not stop until after 11. My soul flinched with every pop. In my dreams the popping continued until things went nightmarish. Civil war for the second time in this young country. Upon waking this morning the feeling of impending chaos/danger is strong and with good reason. #trulytheend #scarredandscared https://www.instagram.com/p/CfOr3Cmuoa_/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

You're fucking with my feelings. Leading me here. Touching me there. Reaching out when no one else is near. But what is that? You're here when I need you to love me, and to hold me. You're leading me to feel for you. Trust Issues. We've discussed that. You're afraid I'll leave youu and I'm afraid you'll hurt me. But isn't that all the same? So youu run. Leaving me alone. It's the same tired game I've always ran. The final play of the game. So where am I now? I'm lost.