"   i   do   ---   !   "

sometimes   she   feels   she's   grown   dull   in   her   motherhood   .   god   only   knows   she   was   hardly   any   more   intrepid   in   her   student   days   (   not   long   ago   now,   but   still   remembered   with   an   aged   sense   of   nostalgia   )   ,   but   there's   always   a   twist   of   worry   that   she   was   too   eager   to   settle   down   too   quickly   ,   far   too   young   .   wife   and   mother   before   her   mid   -   twenties   ,   before   she   could   even   finish   college   .   it's   an   odd   feeling   :   a   sense   of   maturity   and   responsibility   unshared   by   her   peers   ,   contrasted   with   that   aching   sense   that   she's   unwittingly   excluded   herself   from   some   greater   purpose   meant   for   one's   twenties   ,   something   everyone   else   (   including   jack   ,   she   reflects   with   a   twinge   of   upset   ,   judging   by   his   recent   stream   of   late   nights   out   )   seems   to   be   in   on   except   her   .

but   ---   motherhood   is   a   point   of   pride   for   her   .   despite   the   nagging   doubts   that   trail   after   her   as   she   tends   to   child   ,   day   in   and   day   out   ,   worries   are   accompanied   by   a   sense   of   peace   ,   of   purpose   .   if   there's   one   thing   she   exists   for   ,   it’s   to   be   mother   to   her   danny   .   

↪       @samuehl​  sent   :     ❝  i’m a phone call away.  ❞

           @samuehl​     🖤      for     a     starter     .

                                    𝐁𝐋𝐎𝐎𝐃        𝐎𝐍        𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑        𝐇𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐒            ,        blood        on        you        shirt        .        your        soul’s        𝘥𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘩𝘦𝘥        in        it        by        now        .     it     sticks        to        your        skin       like        glue       .       your        arms        raise        into        the        air        ,        𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠            --        the        body        of        a        man        by        your        feet        .            ❝            𝚍𝚘𝚗’𝚝        𝚑𝚞𝚛𝚝        𝚖𝚎        ,       please      .        i        ---        i       𝘧𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥        him        like        this        .            ❞   

the diner seems it is stuck in time. it is crowded and filled with unintelligible noise coming from the customers. occasionally, the door opens and fresh, cold air reaches their table. however, no matter how many people leave, it is as if the diner’s as crowded as ever. there is a robotic smile adorning each waitress’ face that does not reach their empty-looking eyes. they seem a bit too eager to be working at 2 am. they are buzzing around, trying to spread the cheer to anyone who is unfortunate enough to be there at such an hour. it is an odd place, to say the least, but they were lucky they found some place to eat in the middle of nowhere. her eyes turn to scan the menu. she raises her voice slightly so that it can reach her company’s ears. 

                  "I   can   change   everything   about   me   to   fit   in."

“  fuck,  dude.  ”   his  eyes  are  narrowing  through  the  darkness  of  the  night.   the  moon’s  glow  does  an  awful  job  at  providing  any  kind  of  light  source  for  the  two  men  as  it  hides  behind  thick  clouds.   it’s  clear  that  one  man  seems  more  used  to  this  than  the  other  ----  and  obviously  max  is  the  latter.   “  i  really  don’t  know  why  you  needed  my  help  for  this.  ”   what  kind  of  assistance  could  he  possibly  provide  other  than  being  extra  weight  to  drag  along?   “  --  but  uh,  gotta  tell  you  i’m  not  really  feelin’  it  right  now.  ”