#sam gilbert

We also got this lovely photo of all of us together - Stella Grace and I look like siblings! Ladies, prayer is the best anti-aging treatment you could ask for!

Sam: Heaven, we need to talk. All this stress is bad for the baby - 

Heaven: I don’t want to talk to you! You betrayed me, and the Watcher, and our family, and me!

Sam: I’m a changed man! I prayed on it and the Watcher says it’s true and has forgiven me! I stopped seeing that harlot more than a year ago. Are you saying that you can’t forgive me even though the Watcher has? Are you more important than the Watcher?

Heaven: I guess not... If the Watcher really has forgiven you, I suppose I can too.

Sam: Excellent! And I made you an appointment with Pastor Andrews to talk about any feelings you have. He suggested we do some counselling together as well to help you get over these un-Watcherly feelings.

Heaven: Whatever you say, Sam. The Watcher says I have to obey you so I will. But I think we should not tell the children - think of the ideas they might get in their heads! 

Sam: Yeah yeah, whatever. I think Savanna may have overheard the whole thing anyway. Hey, you still made my breakfast, right? I’m starving and I need to run to work. 

We got a new dollhouse to celebrate Seven’s birthday, but in just a few hours it was destroyed! No one would own up to it, but the girls were distraught. I suspected it was Sadie since she looked quite jealous of the presents Seven was getting, so I sent her to her room early (once she finished tidying up). 

We finished up the night by watching a good Watcherly movie together as a family! It’s so important to carefully monitor your children’s exposure to media, and make sure they’re only watching wholesome, Watcher-centered media - non Watcherly families should do this more! Then there wouldn’t be so many immoral people in the world!

Baby number eight is due any day now! We asked all the children what her name should be, and we’re choosing from their suggestions. It’s so precious to have the big siblings involved in the birth of their new baby sister - Stella Grace is even going to be present for the birth this time! How special!

Sam: Stop. Anita - it’s over. I’m sorry I let it go on this long, but we’re done. I’ve prayed and prayed on it, and the Watcher has guided me back to Heaven. 

Anita: Heaven? Like, you’re dying?

Sam: No, Heaven as in my wife. 

Anita: You’re married?!?!?!?! But... Sam...

Sam: I don’t want to hear it. The Watcher told me that I need to end this. Just leave.

Anita: Sam, wait! I’m pregnant! It’s your baby -

Sam: What?! That’s a terrible lie to tell, you jezebel! Now, begone, I never want to see or hear of you again.

Anita: But Sam, it’s your child -

Sam: I know you’re lying. I already have all the children the Watcher has decided to give me. I don’t want or need anymore. 

Sam: Er.. Heaven... they’re nothing. I mean no one. They were just leaving. Trying to sell us baby formula or something.

Anita: That’s a lie! We had a relationship, and this is Sam’s daughter!

Heaven: Sam... what? This can’t be true. Swear on the Watcher that this harlot is lying!

Sam: I....... can’t swear on the Watcher.

Heaven: What?!! You’re kidding me! Adultery is a SIN. You’re the worst kind of sinner! I want a divorce!

Sam: Now Heaven, don’t be like that. Divorce is also a sin -

Heaven: I never want to speak to you again!

Anita: I think we’re just gonna.... scurries away Don’t worry, sweetie. I promise I’ll get justice for you! We’ll just have to be patient....

Heaven: What?? How can you... where are you going? Why? You can’t leave me alone with all the kids!

Sam: I’ve been feeling super run down so I took an opportunity to go on a holiday. I’m your headship, I can do what I want!

Heaven: Don’t use that tone with me!

Sam: Right, sorry Heaven, but ah.... I’m going. And that’s final.

Heaven: Ugh, fine! But take Seamus with you, he needs male guidance. He’s spending way too much time with his sisters, and there’s no other Watcherly young boys for him to socialise with around here. 

Sam: Can it wait, honey? I have to get ready for work.

Heaven: But it’s such important news darling - I’m expecting again! Praise the Watcher!

Sam: You... what?

Heaven: Expecting! You know, another blessing for our family! An arrow in our quiver for the Watcher!

Sam: I thought we agreed - NO MORE CHILDREN! I’m working 100 hours a week, Heaven. I can barely afford electricity for the house!

Heaven: But the Watcher will provide, Sam! You just need to be more faithful in your prayer! I have an idea - why don’t we give thanks to the Watcher and spend some time in prayer together!

Sam: I don’t have time for this, Heaven. I’ll need to pick up more hours at work, more overtime... this is a disaster!

Heaven: Sam, how can you say that! “Children are a gift from the Watcher; they are a reward from him.” We are blessed.