Shoutout to the construction workers who correctly gendered me yesterday when I tokyo drifted into the median damn right I am my father's son

Bro I'm telling you we have to fuck nasty it's for the plot bro I promise it's narritively important for you to suck my dick bro you don't understand I'm literally required by the author to step on you bro why don't you throw a little kissie on my forehead in there too for the fans bro👉👈👀

So what I'm learning is that every attempt to get my life in order results in a fucking whammy. Is it funny or tragic that the last two times I actually cleaned my house I got into a car accident within a week😐

DON'T kill urself. Someday you will be friends with the younger version of yourself and it will be like reaching back in time except this time you can actually make it alright

few things i despise more than forgetting a password for something online and when i go to change it to the password that feels easiest to remember/guess if we forget (aka the password we tried first probably), it goes "you've already used this password before, please choose something else :)" and then it does this for the next two or three we try like buddy. if you would stop doing this we might stop forgetting the increasingly esoteric and unrememberable passwords you're forcing us to create LOL

Need a fuckin bromance with a weird older guy. C'mon where's MY toxic yaoi?