I am an impatient person.
At this point of my life, I always feel like I have to make sure that I’m already on the path where my dreams are at the end of it. The sense of responsibilities, the pressure from different people, and the fact that I’m already a professional (hope I’m not) consumes a whole lot of me lately. It’s not working on a corporate world that tires me, but the idea if my work is aligned to my purpose does. I care too much if my calling is really in this corporate world or maybe somewhere else. I question myself if this is where I’ll get to align what I love to do and where I’m good at. Is this really for me? Is this where I should invest a lot of my young adult years? And everyday, it’s a battle in my head if what I’m doing right now of with greater purpose or am I selfish for being here? I don’t know. I got questions, merely about purpose and aligning my God-given gifts with my calling.
Oh you know this, some quarter-life crisis.
Clearly, I am an impatient person.
And God loves making me wait for answers.
Honestly, it was just this morning that I get to surrender all these things bugging in my head. I’ve been drowning lately but thank God for being a God of peace and not a God of confusion. This season of my life is definitely a page-turning one where I become from a little girl of big dreams to a woman with visions. And I know I can’t be that if I keep on worrying and putting the trust in myself. Where in fact, I don’t know what’s best for me. I don’t know where I’m going. I don’t know really know what’s the future of all these things I am doing right now. And guess what, I will never know. But it’s enough that God knows, and that’s where I should put my confidence at.
God knows exactly what He is doing.
Realizing this, I started to trash away my worries when it comes to calling, purpose and aligning my gifts with them. He’s a sovereign God, His will and plan for us will follow us no matter where we go. The mere fact that God placed me here is enough to say that I’m called to be here for a reason. I’m destined here for a greater purpose which I couldn’t know if I don’t act upon what He wants me to do here. God is good at not making things hard. He just wants me to enjoy and embrace this season as much as I can, and be attentive to His voice for what’s next in line.
I maybe on a corporate world right now where I get to face challenges of different sorts. I’ll get to interact with people with sets of belief, principle, culture and personality. It’s a corporate world, a dog-eat-dog world. How can I fulfill God’s purpose in it? Guess what, it’s my everyday choice. After all, I only have one purpose, and that is to live for His glory and not mine. The little things I do day by day determines that purpose. You know I could’ve been somewhere easier to see God’s purpose align with my calling, but then God placed me to here. What matters most is I know that it’s a season where He will show me what are my God-given gifts and pattern it to the things I’ll love to do. I’ll get to master these gifts and soon enough I’ll learn to use them well. Simply, working in a corporate world is just God’s way of equipping and molding me as I fulfill His purpose in my life. I don’t have to rush the process. I’m 22, and it’s important that I know my season. It will be harder than I think, but I’m very sure how He will see me through. I’m even more excited on how God will reveal Himself to me in this journey.
I don’t know what will tomorrow bring.
I just know that God is already there.