#saddershades

She decided to remain quiet about liking the dress because it cost nearly three times the price of the dresses worn by most women in that era. The department store had prices higher than other stores, but their items for sale were considered top quality.

Bill noticed the way Leigh was gazing at the dress.

"Baby, that (he pronounced the word as 'dat') would look stunnin' on you."

"It's very pretty, but the price is extortionistic. I could make a dress similar to it for much less money." She secretly hoped that the manager of the Women's Clothing section would allow her to put it on layaway after the holidays were over and she could wear it next Christmas.

While waiting to cross the street, Bill told her,

"Sweetheart, I done a real stupid thing earlier today. When I was gettin' in the car to go home from work, I kinda tripped an' smashed the hell outta that nice watch ya got me for my birthday before we went overseas."

"Honey, are you OK? I hope you didn't get hurt."

"I tripped on my good leg. I'm fine. I'm really sorry about breakin' the watch."

"A watch can be replaced. As long as you're not hurt, that's the most important thing." They continued their walk down the street. Leigh decided to find a nice replacement for the watch that was broken. She thought that she would look at watches during her lunch hour on the following day.

On the way home, Leigh told Bill,

"I'm looking forward to helping Mama with the Feast of the Seven Fishes this year."

"You done one hell of a good job fixin' the feast in Aldebourne." He had a devilish grin as he added, "I remember not havin' you beside me an' sittin' up so I could see where ya were. I got treated to a beautiful sight o' you bent over tendin' the fire. You looked really sexy in that silk an' lace set I bought for your birthday.

That reminds me, I might find a little somethin' for ya to wear that's sexy. I enjoy seein' you in that fancy stuff anytime."

Snow began to fall and Bill was glad they didn't have a long drive to get home. The weather made him think about Bastogne. He didn't notice the hushed atmosphere outside as the snowflakes swirled in the air. Guarnere was transported to the frozen Bois St. Jacques where endless shelling from the enemy shook the ground and the deafening barrage seemed to go on forever.

Bill was aware of his surroundings as he drove to South Philadelphia, he saw the traffic, the movement of the windshield wipers and the snow. Still, he felt as if he could hear the exploding shells and the occasional screaming from men who were hit by enemy bullets or shells and the shouts of "Medic!"

Counseling for veterans wasn't provided along with the physical therapy for those who needed it and the reintegration into civilian life. Veterans had to deal with what would be known today as PTSD. The term used to describe the psychological trauma some of the veterans had was called shell shock.

Those suffering from this type of trauma were encouraged to "suck it up," "keep a stiff upper lip" and to "get on with their lives." For these reasons, most veterans never discussed what they did in the war with their wives and families. As far as some of these veterans were concerned, the war was over and they had to go on with everyday life.

Leigh noticed that Bill was unusually quiet and she guessed that he was thinking about the war. She knew that the one year anniversary of his life changing injury was coming up and she hoped that she could help him if the memories were too intense.

Guarnere forced himself to stop living in the past. He saw that Leigh looked worried.

"Sweetheart, I'm gonna be OK. There ain't nothin' for you to worry about. I'm just thankful that I'm not in Bastogne."

Bill pulled the car into a parking space behind the rowhouse. He shut off the engine and took the key out of the switch. Then, he got out and opened the car door for Leigh. As she exited the car, Bill ensured that the car doors were locked.

He took her hand and they walked up the back steps. Leigh unlocked the door and they entered the kitchen. After supper was over, Bill helped her do the dishes and they listened to the radio before going to bed.

After being asleep for about three hours, Leigh noticed that Bill was restless. She immediately noticed that their bedroom was very cold and she knew that Bill couldn't sleep in a cold room.

"The temperature must have dropped quite a bit outside. I'm going downstairs to put more coal in the furnace. Would you like to have an extra blanket on the bed, Honey?" Guarnere was already putting on his wooden leg. As he donned his trousers, he told her,

"I can take care o' the furnace, Baby. You don't have to do that. Leigh, I know you're lookin' out for me an' I know you're doin' this because ya love me. Sweetheart, let me do what I know I can do."

"I'm sorry, Bill. I didn't mean to treat you like an invalid. I got carried away. From now on, if you know you can do something, I won't try to stop you." Guarnere put on the shirt he had worn earlier in the day and some shoes. He walked over to Leigh's side of the bed and kissed her.

"Thanks for understandin', Baby. You didn't hurt my feelins. While I'm in the basement, you could put an extra blanket on the bed if you want, 'cause it takes time for the room to get warm."

Leigh got up and went to their closet. The blankets were folded and stored on a shelf. She selected a soft wool blanket that she bought in London and put it on the bed. Then, she got back into bed and waited for Bill to return from the basement. He soon entered their bedroom,

"We should be feelin' warm soon, Sweetheart." He took off his shirt, trousers, socks and shoes. Then he sat on the edge of the bed to remove his wooden leg. Once he was in bed, Leigh turned off the lamp on the bedside table. Bill stretched out on the bed, pulling Leigh close to him.

"I can think of a real good way to warm up, Baby." He kissed Leigh, quickly deepening the kiss as he began to caress her." After the kiss ended, Leigh told him,

"I like the way you think, Honey. Let me put my diaphragm in and then I'm all yours."

Two days after Bill and Leigh noticed the red dress in the department store's window, Guarnere was on his lunch break. He decided to drive to a diner that was in the area of the department stores. While he was stopped at a red light, Bill noticed Leigh looking at the red dress in the window of the store.

Leigh entered the store. Bill found a parking spot close to the diner. As he crossed the street to the diner, he hoped to find a table next to the window. He wanted to find out if she was purchasing the dress.

Bill got a seat at the last table available that was beside the window. After a waitress took his order, he watched the front doors of the store. Soon, Leigh exited the shop. She was disappointed because the store didn't have a layaway policy.

He noticed that Leigh didn't purchase anything since she had no shopping bag from the store. After he finished his lunch and a cigarette, Bill went into the shop and found a middle aged woman who was a sales clerk. He described Leigh to the woman and she confirmed that a customer fitting her description asked her about the possibility of putting a dress on layaway.

Bill told the sales clerk that the woman in question was his wife and he wondered if she put the red dress in the window on layaway. The clerk said that her customer was disappointed because the department store didn't do layaways.

"Ma'am, would ya happen to know what size dress she wanted? I want to buy that for her Christmas present, but I don't know much about the sizes for women's clothes." He gave the clerk what he hoped was his most appealing smile.

The woman was charmed by Bill's polite demeanor and his smile. She told him the size of the dress that Leigh wanted. Guarnere thanked her for her help and asked,

"Ma'am, is there a way for you to hold the size she wanted in that dress until tomorrow? I can pay for it on my lunch break." She took Bill's name and he gave her Augusta's number so if a call was made about the dress, Leigh wouldn't find out. The clerk told him that the dress would be held until 1 p.m. the following day.

Leigh went from the department store to a jewelry store that was further up the street. She was unaware that Bill had seen her and she was hoping to find a nice watch for him.

The jewelry store had a nice selection of men's watches, but Leigh was unable to find what she wanted. She left the shop and went to a nearby department store. After looking around for a few minutes, Leigh found a watch that was a very popular brand. It was guaranteed to have unbreakable glass on the face.

Since the extended Guarnere family was so large, the adults drew names of family members. Leigh was happy to have Augusta as the recipient of her gift. Bill had selected Teresa as the recipient of his gift.

Leigh was hoping that Bill would honor the decision they made to buy one gift for each other. While they both worked, neither position paid a large amount of money. She had just started working for the radio station in late August and while Leigh technically had her own show, she was paid the same salary as anyone starting out on the radio at the CBS station in Philadelphia.

The following day, Bill visited the department store on his lunch break and purchased the dress for Leigh. The sales clerk who helped him put the dress on hold asked him,

"Sir, would you be interested in some lingerie for your wife? We have a lovely red silk bra, garter belt and tap panty set that arrived this morning." Guarnere was interested in seeing the set. He remembered Leigh's bra and panty size from the time he bought the satin and lace set for her birthday. He bought the red silk set. The lingerie was a little more expensive than he realized, but he thought,

"I never had a chance to spoil my baby very much durin' the war. I know we agreed to one gift, but Leigh's done so much for me an' she deserves a little somethin' extra. It won't hurt me to take my lunch to work wit' me instead o' eatin' in town." As Bill paid for the items, the clerk told him,

"Your purchases qualify for free gift wrapping. Would you like to have the gifts wrapped, Sir?" Bill agreed and he went to the gift wrapping department of the store.

He chose shiny red wrapping paper with small gold bells printed on it for the box containing the dress. It was topped with a gold ribbon and a large gold bow. The box containing the lingerie set was wrapped in blue paper printed with tiny silver angels. This package had a silver ribbon and it was topped with a medium sized silver bow.

Guarnere thanked the young woman who wrapped the gifts. She carefully placed small cardboard guards around the bows and placed both packages in a large shopping bag. As she handed the bag to Bill, the gift wrapper told him,

"Your wife is a lucky woman to have a nice, good looking guy like you for her husband."

"Thanks, Miss. I'm really lucky to have a beautiful angel for my wife. Maybe you heard her singing on the radio? She has two shows on the CBS station here in town. Her name is Leigh Guarnere."

"I only get to hear her early morning show before I go to work. She's extremely talented." Bill thanked the young woman for her help and her compliment about Leigh. He then looked for a Christmas card for Leigh.

Guarnere found a selection of Christmas cards nearby and looked for a few minutes until he found the perfect card. It had poinsettias on the front of the card that were accentuated with red glitter.

Written across the top of the card in gold colored cursive writing was, "Merry Christmas to My Sweet Wife." Guarnere paid for the card and borrowed a sales clerk's pen to write on the inside of the card,

"Baby, I love you more and more every day. This Christmas is extra special because it's our first Christmas together as husband and wife. Marrying you is the best thing I ever done. All my love, Bill."

Two weeks before Christmas, Leigh paid the remaining balance on the watch. The department store had free gift wrapping and she selected shiny red wrapping paper with a gold bow.

She also had a package wrapped for Augusta. Teresa told Leigh that she overheard her mother saying to Louise Spencer that she accidentally ruined her bathrobe in the wringer of her washer.

Leigh got the correct size from Teresa and she selected a chenille bathrobe in the same shade as her favorite robe, white with a red rose appliqued on the front. Augusta's gift was wrapped in white paper printed with holly berries and it was topped with a large red bow and red ribbons.

She found a card for Bill that had a picture of a cozy room with wood burning in a fireplace. The printed message on the front said,"Merry Christmas to My Dear Husband." Leigh wrote,

"Bill, this reminded me of the living room in Aldebourne where we spent a very special Christmas. You make our house a home and I will love you for eternity, Leigh."

Next, she purchased a card for Augusta that had a Christmas Tree with glittery ornaments. The message said, "Merry Christmas to My Mother-In-Law." Leigh wrote,

"Mama, you made me feel as if I was part of the family from the first time we met. Your cooking advice is making me a better cook and a better wife for Bill. You're a good friend and you're like a second mother to me."

Leigh called Augusta when she got home from work the following afternoon. She told her about an idea she had for an extra gift for Bill, saying,

"Mama, does Pop have time to take on extra work? Bill doesn't have a nice suit. When we had our portrait done, Bill said that his dress uniform was the best suit he had.

If Pop has the time, I'd like to pay him his usual fee and ask if he would make a suit for Bill." Augusta asked Joseph and he said that he would be happy to make a nice suit for his son.

"Sweetie, just bring over Billy's uniform. He can use that to get the right length for the trousers and a nice jacket. Pop said for you to pick out the material for the suit and the lining of the jacket.

He doesn't want to take your money, but I told him that you insisted on payin' for the suit since it's a present for Billy. Joseph wonders if you can drop off the uniform in a couple of days." Leigh told her that she would drop off the uniform after she finished her afternoon show.

Since the elder Guarneres lived within walking distance of Bill and Leigh, she got Bill's dress uniform from the closet, placing it in a large department store bag and took it to her father-in-law. He calculated how much fabric should be purchased and Joseph told Leigh that he had buttons for the trousers and the suit coat. She only needed to buy thread that matched the color of the material.

Leigh took a bus into the downtown area to visit a department store that sold fabric and items used for sewing. She found a nice cotton/wool blend fabric in dark charcoal gray and the matching thread. Then, she located a dark gray silk lining for the suit.

Once the items were purchased, Leigh took the bus back to South Philadelphia and dropped off the items for the suit at her in-laws' house.

Joseph took Bill's uniform and the material to his shop that was in the basement of their house. He wrote down the measurements for the length of the sleeves, the length of the trousers, the waist of the trousers and the width of the chest area and the width of the shoulders for the suit coat.

Leigh stopped by her in-laws' house later that day to retrieve Bill's dress uniform. She returned it to their closet and he never noticed that the uniform had been missing for one day.

The week before Christmas, Augusta called the secretary at the CBS radio station in downtown Philadelphia to leave a message for Leigh. She was happy to learn that the suit was completed.

Leigh took the bus home and walked to Joseph's and Augusta's house. Joseph was very pleased when she told him while paying for the suit,

"Pop, this is much better quality clothing than anything in the stores. It's beautifully made." The elder Guarnere put the suit in a box and the box went into an unmarked bag. He hugged his daughter-in-law and told her that he looks forward to having her and Bill at the annual Christmas Eve feast.

Leigh walked home and was surprised to see that Bill was already home. He had returned from hiding her gifts under the bed in the guest room. After he embraced and kissed her, Guarnere asked,

"Did ya do some Christmas shoppin', Baby?"

"As a matter of fact, I did. I need to put this away, and then I'll get supper started." She went to their bedroom and put the box under their bed. Leigh hid the box among the gifts that were already wrapped and stored under the bed.

Julia and Teresa told Leigh that Bill was notorious for snooping around to find his gifts for Christmas. Leigh stashed the wrapped box containing the watch behind a large box of tampons. She knew that he wouldn't look in the area around the box.

She was slightly amused by her husband's embarrassment seeing her feminine hygiene products. Although Bill knew about women having periods, he felt no need to discuss the topic with her.

Leigh was talking on the phone with Teresa when she told her,

"You know I love Bill, but I had to laugh when I came back from the drugstore last week with a box of Tampax. He walked upstairs with me and we were talking about what to have for supper.

I went into the bathroom and got the box out of the brown paper bag. Bill started to follow me into the bathroom until he saw the box. He slightly blushed and backed away from it." Teresa laughed.

"One of my friends at work has been married for ten years. She sends her husband out to buy feminine napkins from the drugstore. Joann says it used to embarrass him. Now it doesn't bother him one bit. Could you imagine Billy Baby buying that stuff? His face would be as red as a tomato."

"I agree, but I can't do that to him. He's so sweet and kind. I don't want to do anything to embarrass Bill." Teresa told Leigh that she understood.

"I'd like to have a good marriage like you and my baby brother. Ma says that you two were made for each other."

The following evening after work, Bill drove downtown to buy a Christmas Tree and a tree stand. Once he purchased the items, he walked back to his car. He passed the upscale department store where he'd purchased Leigh's dress.

Guarnere glanced in the display window and noticed a small sign advertising personalized Christmas ornaments. Blown glass angels with various shades of hair colors hung on a small Christmas Tree. "A perfect gift for the angel in your life. Our in-store artist will paint the correct shade of hair and the name of your loved one on the ornament for a small fee."

Bill walked into the store and asked a clerk where he could buy the personalized angel ornament. He was directed to a department in the middle of the first floor.

After waiting patiently in line for fifteen minutes, Guarnere bought the angel ornament for $7. Most ornaments sold for prices ranging from fifty cents to $2. The artist made the angel's hair brown and painted Leigh's name on the back.

A small machine that blew a stream of warm air sat on a table next to the artist. He carefully held the ornament in the warm air until the paint was dry. Then, he carefully packed the fragile ornament into a box.

Bill declined having the box wrapped since he was eager to get home. When he entered the kitchen, after embracing and kissing Leigh, he got the box containing the ornament out of his overcoat pocket.

"I got a little somethin' for our Christmas Tree, Sweetheart." Leigh opened the box and was surprised to find the personalized ornament.

"Honey, it's beautiful! I didn't know the hair color and a name could be added to an ornament. Thanks, Bill. You're so sweet and thoughtful."

"I wanted my angel to have a special angel for our Christmas Tree." After supper, Bill got the tree into the tree stand. He and Leigh put on the lights and a new set of bubble lights.

Leigh put on the decorations she took to Aldebourne. Bill helped her place the new ornament toward the top of the tree, along with the star for the top of the tree. The angel ornament was included on every Christmas Tree the Guarneres had over the years.

The Spencers and Louise's parents, John and Mary Elliott, reserved hotel rooms and took a train to Philadelphia to celebrate with the Guarnere family.

Both Louise and her mother were in awe of the amount of food prepared for the Feast of the Seven Fishes. Family members crowded the dining room and a smaller table was set up to accommodate the guests. Everyone enjoyed the food and conversations during the feast. After the feast was finished and the dishes were washed and put away, the Guarneres, the Elliotts and the Spencers attended Midnight Mass.

Bill awoke on Christmas morning as dawn was breaking. He was eager to give Leigh her presents. Guarnere quietly got out of bed and put on the clothes he had worn the day before and headed downstairs to the kitchen.

He knew that Leigh had bought the ingredients for Strata. Bill decided to surprise her by preparing the Strata and the coffee. It didn't take him long to get the ingredients into a pan and into the oven.

While their breakfast was baking, he made fresh coffee. He got out two trays, two plates, silverware, two coffee cups and napkins. Once the Strata was ready, Bill put a portion on Leigh's plate and the plate went onto the tray. Then, he filled the cup with coffee, got the silverware and a napkin.

Next, he carried the tray to their bedroom. Guarnere walked to Leigh's side of the bed and kissed her cheek, telling her,

"Merry Christmas, Baby." She awoke and was surprised to see the tray in Bill's hands.

"Merry Christmas, Honey. I slept too long. You didn't have to make breakfast."

"I enjoy cookin' an' I wanna spoil my angel."

"Thanks, Bill. That Strata looks delicious!"

After breakfast was over and the dishes were washed, Bill went into the guest room to retrieve Leigh's gifts. She went into their bedroom to get the package containing Bill's suit and his Christmas card. Then she got the box containing the watch from the bathroom cabinet.

She carried the gifts and card downstairs, placing them under the Christmas Tree. Leigh saw two gifts under the tree. She grinned, thinking,

"We both decided not to honor the decision to get one gift for each other." Bill was sitting on the couch."

"Go ahead an' open your presents, Baby. I hope ya like 'em." Leigh got her gifts and placed them on the coffee table, along with the card from Bill. She bought his gifts and card, placing them on the coffee table next to her presents.

Leigh got the larger box and remarked,

"This is beautifully wrapped." She removed the paper, saving the ribbon and bow to use again, and opened the box. Leigh was extremely surprised to see the red wiggle dress.

"Honey, this is a wonderful surprise! I wanted to put this on layaway, but the store doesn't do layaway on items. Oh, Bill, this is beautiful and very extravagant." She hugged and kissed him, "Thank you. I never thought that I'd have this dress."

"I'm glad ya like it, Baby. That dress was made for you." Leigh handed Bill the large box.

"I hope I got the right color for you, Honey." He removed the wrapping paper and opened the lid. He wasn't expecting a new suit. Bill took out the suit coat and trousers.

"Baby, the color is perfect." He tried on the jacket and held up the trousers, adding," It looks custom made."

"It is custom made by one of the best tailors in Philadelphia for his son. I paid Pop for his work since this is your present. Plus, I didn't want to take advantage of Pop's generous nature."

"Leigh, you're an angel, ain't no way you would take advantage o' anybody. It's sweet o' you to pay Pop for his sewin'. You're real thoughtful, too. I needed a good suit." She returned Bill's embrace,

"When we had our portrait made, you said that your dress uniform was the only good suit you had." She opened the next present,

"Oh, Honey, it's gorgeous! I'm looking forward to modeling it for you." Leigh gave him a passionate kiss. After the kiss ended, she handed the second gift to Bill.

"You have another present, Honey." He opened the gift and grinned as he saw the watch.

"You know I needed this. It's shock proof, the glass is unbreakable an' it's even waterproof! Ya went all out 'cause this is a really good watch. I'm puttin' it on right now." Guarnere set and wound the watch before he put it on. He embraced and kissed her.

"That's a classy lookin' watch an' suit. Since we wear nice clothes for Christmas, I'm wearin' my new suit to Ma's and Pop's house." He gave Leigh her card and she handed Bill's card to him.

She read the message and hugged him,

"It's beautiful and I love what you wrote, Honey. Marrying you is the best thing I ever did, too. I want to display my card on the table before I get cleaned up. I'm wearing that exquisite dress today and I plan to model that lovely set for you soon."

Guarnere opened his card and read the message written by Leigh. He tenderly kissed her.

"That does remind me of the livin' room in Aldebourne. We had a hot time on that couch. Baby, even then,I was hopin' that you would be my wife someday. You make this house a home for me, too. That was a sweet thing to say."

There was a small gathering at the Guarneres' since Julia and Maria were spending Christmas Day at the homes of their in-laws. Both sets of parents and Leigh's grandparents thought Leigh's new dress was very pretty and that Bill looked very handsome in his new suit. Joseph was proud to hear his daughter-in-law say that one of the best tailors in the city made Bill's suit.

Augusta was surprised to have her favorite robe replaced and she also enjoyed the card Leigh gave her. Bill and Leigh had given their parents and her grandparents 8x10" copies of the portrait they had made shortly after their wedding.

The newlyweds were glad to get a gift of frozen steaks and some other cuts of beef from Leigh's grandpa. Cal and Louise gave Bill and Leigh a $25 gift certificate from Popi's restaurant. The Spencers also gave a gift certificate in the same amount to the elder Guarneres. Teresa liked Bill's gift of a new purse. Leigh helped him pick it out in one of the local department stores.

Before Bill and Leigh returned home for the evening, Augusta gave her a gift from Julia, since she got Leigh's name for the gift exchange.

"Sweetie, Julia said that you might want to open this at home. That's why I didn't bring it out earlier." Leigh was both eager and curious to find out what her sister-in-law bought.

Once they got home, she opened the box from Julia and was surprised to find a red silk robe that matched the lingerie set from Bill. One of Julia's friends worked in the store and she saw Guarnere buying the gift. She let Julia use her employee's discount so she could purchase the robe.

Bill was pleased to see that Leigh had the matching robe to the set. He wasn't aware it was for sale and he guessed that it went on sale after he bought the lingerie for Leigh. The day after Christmas, Leigh called and thanked Julia for her gift, telling her,

"It was a perfect match for a set Bill bought." Then, Julia told her about her friend who worked in the store and saw Bill buying the red satin set.