#s23ficmas

it’s been one hour and a half since you and megumi started drinking and the silence is beyond excruciating.

you both have many things to say, he and you are aware of that, but somewhat the both of you can’t push yourselves to say any of it. fear holds your words back, locking them in your throats.

after a cheerful weekend with all of your friends, you were left alone; yuta and maki took off first thing in the morning and, since you slept until 1 p.m. and nobara had an assignment to turn in, yuji drove her.

megumi rented the place so, being the one who needed to hand the keys to the renter, promised yuji he would take you home instead.

problem is – by the time you got up and packed your things, a snowstorm started, trapping you and megumi in the cabin far above some mountains.

“uh, i forgot to tell you… yuji apologized for not driving you back. he was your ride, right?” megumi finally breaks the silence, his gaze locked on his empty glass of wine.

he wonders if he should fill it again.

he is a lightweight, but the wine isn’t that strong.

“that’s fine,” you couldn’t care less about yuji. not right now. this is the closest you’ve ever been to megumi, the guy who unknowingly has you on your knees, the reason you suggested drinking together in the first place. “sorry to trouble you, though.”

the raven-haired boy can feel your eyes on him, as if you’re trying to figure him out. if the wine hadn’t tinted his cheeks red yet, you would be able to see the blush on his face.

silence engulfs you again, and it sickens him to hear you gulping down your drink. with the silence, it becomes so very easy to hear all the little sounds you make, even your breathing. he’s not sure he can handle it.

he needs to break it.

“so… you and yuji?”

megumi wants to slap himself the moment the words leave his lips. what kind of question is that? he swears at himself, but he truly wants to know.

he has liked you for so long that, when he started growing suspicious about your relationship with yuji, he didn’t have the stomach to ask about it to his best friend. he would tell himself he was better off not knowing.

but yuji isn’t here.

and you… you are.

he hears it when you laugh – a laugh so genuine it warms his heart – and turns his head to look at you. you seem really amused, but he doesn’t get what’s so funny and a little pout appears on his lips.

“uh, me and yuji are just friends, megumi,” you say when your laugh comes to an end. “just friends.”

“ah,” should he believe you? you aren’t even close. why would you tell him? “i just thought…”

“what did you think, megs?” you’re fast to approach him, now sitting so close together your thighs touch and your breath fans over his jaw. you wear a playful, almost wicked, smile as you press further, “did you think i was fucking yuji?”

the dirty word in your voice makes megumi’s cock twitch. he tries to keep his breathing steady, putting his glass on the table before turning completely to you, although avoiding your eyes. does it matter if he lies? “yes.”

“why do you care?” your ambush has him almost collapsing in front of you. megumi can feel his blood running cold as he tries to think of an answer to give you, a decent one that won’t put him into further trouble. “do you want to fuck me instead, megumi?”

it is so hard to think when your face is so close. are you testing him? have you found out about his crush on you? about his perverted fantasies? are you trying to catch him red-handed?

megumi lifts his eyes to meet yours, a ‘sorry’ on the tip of his tongue when he catches on how you seem to be drowned in lust. your pupils dilated, shining bright, and a silent request you never make.

he kisses you with utter desperation, his hand grabbing the back of your neck to pull you closer and guide you through it. you straight up mewl against his lips, the sound making his blood run straight down to his dick.

as his tongue invades your mouth, you grab his shirt tight and lay down, pulling him with you. megumi doesn’t even know where to put his hands, shaking slightly as he runs them over your sides; grabbing, squeezing, making sure you are really there.

as soon as you part the kiss, your lips are on his neck and he groans, rutting his hips against your legs. he can feel his entire body growing hotter, his cheeks flushing, but you give him no time to doubt himself as you part your legs to accommodate him.

“shit…” he hisses, thrusting in a desperate attempt to have some relief. “can i… can i take these off? is this okay?”

you nod and he immediately retreats, just enough to take your sweatpants off you. too many clothes, he thinks. everything suddenly became so hot.

“take yours off, too,” you say. “please.”

you watch, lust and adoration filling you, as he stands and pulls his pants down with trembling hands. you can see the bulge on his underwear, your mouth salivating at the sight.

but megumi doesn’t wait another second before he’s on the couch again, kneeling in front of you. his hands are cold when they touch your knees, silently asking for you to open your legs again – and you do.

“kiss me again,” you notice he’s nervous so you ask, and when megumi presses his weight down on you and connects your lips again, you become a mess. “megumi…” you whisper between a kiss, moaning softly when he thrusts against you, the wetness in your panties making it feel so damn good. “are you sure you want this?”

megumi knows you can see his anxiety, but you erase it with each kiss. you erase it when you roll your hips on him, making him whimper. “yes. yes.”

you’re not sure he’s answering your question, and he buries his face on your neck as his right hand goes straight to your core. “megumi.”

“want this… want you so bad,” he whines close to your ear, pulling your panties down a little and cupping your pussy. you both moan, “shit– you’re so wet. i did this?”

his question is genuine, taking his face off your neck to look at you. he looks so fucked up and it drives you insane, knowing he was on cloud nine for touching you alone.

“y–yeah. you did,” you can barely express yourself as he massages your lower lips, his eyes locked on your face to gather every bit of your reactions. when he presses his thumb on your clit, it’s your turn to whimper, “fuck, fuck, –gumi.”

“feels good?” he’s so desperate for confirmation you’d find it cute if you weren’t so lost in yourself already.

“yeah, so good,” he hums happily with your answer, playing with your clit and circling your entrance with one of his fingers. you cry out when he pushes it inside, pumping a few times before pushing in another, “‘s so good. so good to me, megumi,” you’re out of your mind, moving your hips with him.

his chest fills with pride as he watches you squirm underneath him, hearing you praise him. he doesn’t even see you moving your hand to grab his cock, making him falter for a bit.

you push his underwear down just enough to free him, almost automatically smearing the pre-cum leaking from his tip as much as you can before wrapping your hand around him, “wanna make you– feel good too.”

he sighs in pleasure, curling his fingers inside you as he thrusts them and massages your clit. you stop pumping him for a second to collect your own wetness before enveloping him again, “fuck, fuck.” he doesn’t know for how long he can last, knowing damn well he looks like a dog in heat as he matches your movements and speed.

your orgasm comes crashing down and megumi eats the sounds you make by kissing you, the way your walls clench around his fingers and you make a mess on them being the last straw for him to cum as well.

you gasp, still coming down from your high as you feel his seed dripping on your sensitive pussy, painting it white. almost as if claiming you.

when you open your eyes to see there’s cum everywhere, you notice it wasn’t intentional. “shit, megumi, you’re so hot.”

he’s still shaking, so you motion for him to lay on top of you, “sorry, i didn’t want to–”

you shut him by taking your hand to your mouth, licking his cum off it with adoration. megumi feels his cock stir, but copies your movements, licking you off his fingers as well.

you don’t even have to think before you put your fingers on his mouth and he puts his on yours. you feel synchronized, eyes locked on each other and mind filled with dirty thoughts as you suck each other’s fingers off.

and then megumi kisses you again, your mouth filled with the taste of you both combined and you sigh, “you’re so good.”

you don’t mind how many times you’ve said it, you want to keep saying it over and over again. especially when his eyes light up like that.

megumi waited for you for a long time and now he truly is going to be good.

to you.

⭐️ Itachi never knew his way around the kitchen so when he suggests you bake Christmas cookies together, you find it amusing.

“Sure, tomorrow we can make some.”

⭐️ Even though he says nothing, your little laugh offends him.

⭐️ So you wake up the next morning with a terrible smell – something is burning.

⭐️ You find Itachi in the kitchen with a batch of cookies on his hands, placing it on the table as he coughs;

⭐️ There’s smoke everywhere, and the cookies are black.

⭐️ The kitchen is a mess.

⭐️ Flour everywhere, broken eggshells and dirty bowls.

“I thought we were going to bake together?”, you can’t help but laugh. Even his face is covered in powder, but you ignore it as you give him a quick kiss, “Good morning, babe.”

“Good morning, love,” he says so sweetly it’s almost like the fire detector isn’t about to go off. “I was going to show you I could make these, but I failed.”

⭐️ He looks so disappointed in himself.

⭐️ You cup his face and kiss him again.

“It’s cute, don’t be sad. I love cooking for you anyway,” you try to take him off his sorrow. “Come, let’s make a second batch and it will be perfect.”

⭐️ It actually works out.

⭐️ Sure, you have to keep him away from eggs and almost hug him from behind as you guide his hands through some of the process;

⭐️ But Itachi thinks that’s just perfect.

⭐️ You explain everything you’re doing and don’t let the cookies burn this time, and he pays attention to everything.

⭐️ When the cookies are ready and you’re decorating them, he pushes the one he’d be working on in your direction.

⭐️ You open the biggest smile when you read “I ❤️ you” on a little Christmas tree cookie.

⭐️ You give him one too, and it reads “I ❤️ my fav baker”.

everything feels out of place as you lay in bed trying to place together pieces of an unfinished puzzle.

two weeks have passed since the last time you and gojo spoke to each other. two weeks since you broke up with him, leaving a part of your heart behind.

you know you have to move on, but it’s hard when you have years of friendship and a one-year-long relationship weighing on your back. you look back to all the efforts you put into it and, foremost, you can’t completely let him go.

you always knew about gojo’s personality, in fact, you fell in love with it. but it became unsustainable when you were the one doing everything while he sat back and watched.

you used to say to him, “you are a good person. you are the best person I’ve fallen for, like a window of light in the dark.” and never once you regretted those words. you made sure to repeat them to him during the breakup.

you truly believe satoru’s a good person, and he never intended to hurt you. what defined the fate of your relationship was his inconstancy, his fear of emotions.

gojo could shower you with kisses and “i love you”s for days, but they were always half-hearted and, whenever the conversation between the two of you took a deeper turn, he would instantly shut down.

become cold, even.

he also didn’t care much about life in general, talking about several topics and simply forgetting to ask simple questions like “how was your day?”

you knew he cared, but it didn’t feel like he did.

it killed you every time he’d disappear for an entire day, especially on days you weren’t okay, not even bothering to reply to your texts, and then replying with a mere “i was busy” – you knew it already, but a text would be nice.

and to match his emotionless self, you were the embodiment of intensity.

you tried to crack up his shell, always paying attention to what he said and remembering it. you dove head first into every interest he had, and supported him in every choice he made.

you cared, you asked and, mostly, you talked.

multiple times, you tried to express how you felt, how you wish he could open up more and maybe just regard you a little more – a few texts not to worry you wouldn’t hurt. gojo said he was like that, but that he would try to be better.

what mined your relationship was that lie.

because he never even tried.

and after another month of dealing with all of that, with not feeling wanted enough, cared enough, you decided to end everything.

you can’t lie a little part of you hoped he would fight for you, ask for you to stay. but as you watched distress filling his eyes, all he could muster was, “i’m really sorry i couldn’t be better.”

and you lost everything you thought you had.

you blink away your tears, trying to escape from your painful thoughts, and get up from the bed – it’s past seven now and you need to start getting ready for a christmas party at one of your friends’ house.

you need to move on.

after taking a quick shower, you put on the red dress you’ve decided to wear – a dress that gojo bought for you months before – before starting to do your makeup.

this is when your doorbell rings.

you frown, “who is it?” you yell as you make your way toward the door, but there’s no time for an answer before you open it.

you almost close it again when you see your ex-boyfriend standing there, but you don’t. you know you need to be mature about this situation, even if seeing him makes all the walls you’ve been building crumble down.

it hurts.

“gojo.”

you don’t look him in the eye, focusing on his christmas sweater instead. funnily, the one you gave him a year ago.

“can i come in? it’s freezing outside.”

if you looked into his eyes, though, you would see the big blue bag under them. you would see how faded his blue irises are, and how fucking anxious satoru is.

you don’t ask further questions, letting him into the house he knows all too well before you close the door. he follows you like a lost puppy, and keeps standing when you sit on the couch.

“you look gorgeous,” he compliments meekly.

“thank you. what do you want?” it takes all of you to not start crying right then and there, but you know you have to be firm.

“i want you back.”

satoru doesn’t beat around the bush, and the silence that follows is so loud it can be heard. you feel your heart beating in an insane rhythm, and your head spins.

“gojo, you can’t–”

“you were right. you are right. about everything,” he interrupts you. “i was a boy, and for that i’m sorry. i acted like you had to keep up with my shit, like you would always be there, and i’m sorry for that too,” gojo speaks so fast you can barely keep up with him, like he’s going to die if he doesn’t say those words. “i thought i couldn’t change, i thought i didn’t have to. because it is easier to live the way i live, but… it is much harder to live without you.”

“gojo–”

again, he doesn’t let you speak, “don’t call me that. please, don’t call me that,” gojo drops on his knees in front of you and grabs your hand. “call me satoru, toru, baby, love for all i care. just not gojo. i’ve been miserable without you, i never thought a person could get so miserable,” his voice cracks, pulling your hand towards his face in a desperate attempt to be comforted. “i promise you i will do better, i will pay attention, text you all the time, tell you all about my past and what made me who i am, scream through my pain for what’s worth. just take me back, please.”

you are so deeply in shock that it takes you a while to register the tears falling down his face, his eyes closed as he expects the worst.

all it takes is for your thumb to caress his cheek softly, and satoru sobs. you grab his face with both of your hands, cleaning his teardrops as your own fall, and you gently kiss his forehead.

it kills you to see him like that, but at the same time it gives you a reason to live to know that he’s willing to try. for you.

you kiss his nose, his cheeks, and then his lips.

satoru whimpers, pulling you into an embrace so strong you’re afraid he’ll never let go.

“toru,” you say when you part your lips and bury your face in his neck, feeling his scent. “everything’s okay now. i’m here, i’ll take care of you.”

“missed you so much, i’m so sorry,” he whispers.

“i missed you, too,” you confess, finally looking into his eyes and frowning when you notice he hasn't slept. “what’s past is past, we’ll be okay. but i guess we should just sleep a bit, hm? it was one hell of a ride.”

“sleep together, right?”

he sounds so clingy, you chuckle lightly.

“yes, toru. together.”

T W O D A Y S A G O

“What’s so important about this bracelet, anyway?”

Your eyes are filled with tears when you look up at Levi, and you try to find words to explain why it meant so much to you without sounding like a fool.

“My father gave it to me before he passed,” your voice cracks, your hand wrapping around your wrist in a failed attempt to find comfort. “It was a constant reminder that he was with me… the only thing I had left.”

Levi doesn’t answer you, averting his gaze instead.

You and the rest of the squad were killing titans when the situation got out of control, so all of you flew out of the forest only for you to find out the bracelet was no longer with you – and you couldn’t recover it, since the area was infested with titans.

Besides, you didn’t know where it could possibly be. The forest was vast, and the bracelet, ridiculously small.

You feel a hand on your shoulder, “I’m sorry.”

It’s Hange, and they really seem sorry.

You try to smile and blink away your tears; crying in front of Levi is something you don’t want to do, even if your heart aches.

No one else says anything, and you hop on your horses to head home.

When you’re riding home and think nobody’s looking, the tears fall down your face.

But Levi sees everything.

N O W — C H R I S T M A S

You can’t stop wrapping your hand around your wrist, trying to replace the feeling of the bracelet – to fill the hole in your chest.

You hate that you lost it, you feel stupid and sad, and even the Christmas lights in your house stay turned off. You don’t feel like celebrating; the only memory of your father is now gone forever.

You sigh in frustration, going to make another cup of tea when you hear knocks on your door.

You aren’t expecting visits. You didn’t plan anything.

Still, you make your way towards your door and open it, a gasp escaping your lips when you see Levi on the other side, wearing casual clothes.

“Captain Levi!?”

He holds a small box, wrapped perfectly, and you wonder what this is all about, “I came here just as Levi. No need to call me Captain,” he says, collected.

“Oh,” is all you can say.

You both stand there for a couple of seconds, looking at each other in silence, before he hands you the box he had with him, “It’s for you. A gift.”

Utter shock fills you. You can’t wrap your mind around the fact that Levi was giving you something.

Why?

“What? Levi, you don’t need to–” the Captain ignores your words, pushing the present into your hands and looking at you with seriousness in his gaze.

You simply nod, knowing there’s no way you can refuse this, and start unwrapping carefully the small box; it reveals a simple little black box, and you look at him once again before opening it.

A soft cry escapes your lips when you see what’s inside.

A bracelet, just like the one you had, placed carefully inside. It shines brightly, and you can feel your eyes burning as you look back up to the man standing in front of you.

“I know it’s not the same thing, since it’s not given by your father, but…” he looks away and, for the first time since you met Levi, he seems uncertain. “I hope this can give you some comfort.”

It amazes you that it is exactly like the one your father gave you, though. To think Levi paid attention to such details and went out of his way to get this for you warms your heart.

“It’s perfect, Levi. Thank you,” you say, smiling through your tears. “From the bottom of my heart, thank you.”

He smiles gently, and you wish for time to stop at that moment; with such a wonderful gift in your hands, and that breathtaking smile.

“I…” you start, heart beating faster. “I just made some tea, do you want to come in?”

Levi thinks for a moment, then nods.

“That would be nice.”

“I’m still not sure if this was a good idea. I may be of assistance in Japan,” Kento Nanami says as the both of you make your way to your hotel room.

“Kento,” you stop in front of the door, looking at him with a serious expression. “You’re not responsible for everything, you’re allowed to get time off and have fun. You’re allowed to relax.”

Nanami sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose as he tries to ease his mind. It’s a conversation you’ve had multiple times, and he agrees with you.

“Now… let’s see our room, shall we?” you giggle, passing the card on the door and opening it for him to see.

You can see a light shining in his eyes when he enters the room, a rare glimpse of a content smile appearing on his lips as he sees the big glass walls, offering you a perfect view of the beach.

Of that beautiful, never-ending sea.

He places the suitcases he was holding on the floor and you do the same, closing the door, and you smile softly when you see him approaching the glass to admire the view.

Opening some of the baggage to start organizing your stuff, you remember something, “Oh, and I brought some books you’ve bought but never got around to reading. I think it’s the perfect moment, huh?”

Nanami looks at you, and he has the most beautiful smile you’ve ever seen on his face. His eyes are closed, and he seems happy.

“I love you.”

“I love you, Kento,” you walk over to him, embracing him from behind. “I want you to relax and have the best two weeks of your life.”

He grabs your hand, that’s placed on his chest, and brings it to his lips, kissing it lovingly while still looking at that wonderful view.

“I just hope this is a one-way mirror glass, love, because what I want to do to you is for our eyes only.”

The Christmas lights are on, but you can’t feel the comfort they usually bring you.

Sitting on your couch, a blanket wrapped around your body while drinking a cup of tea, you try to relax after a long day, to think about happy things.

But you find it hard to do so when your soul longs for the presence of your husband, who’s away on a mission.

The loneliness strikes hard on nights like these, when you have no company but all the things that make you think about him. Your house itself, the one you’ve built together; Levi Ackerman is in each part of it, and you see him wherever you look.

Truth is, you find it hard to live normally without him. His pouty face, witty remarks, and, above all, his love for you. Levi is so integrated into your life that every time he leaves, it’s like he is taking a part of yourself with him.

And with the Holidays coming, your loneliness feels worse than ever.

To think you will have to celebrate it without him, your heart shrinks. It is unfair, and you hate the world a little. You hate it for taking this little moment of happiness from you and, mostly, for taking it from him.

Levi deserves happiness more than anyone.

And yet, he’s out there being the Humanity’s Strongest. Trying to save lives, trying to give his best. You love him for it, God, you really do. But you also want to protect him a little, spare his feelings.

Spare his life.

You can’t even be sure if he will even come back home.

The tears roll down your cheeks like they usually do when Levi’s away, the fear of the unknown taking over as your heart aches.

Curling up on the couch, with only a blanket to warm your body and the tea long forgotten, you cry as the Christmas lights illuminate your face.

And you pray your lover will return safely to you.

nobara <3: don’t worry, he is expecting *someone* to show up bc I told him me and yuuji were going to spend the day in his house lol

You reread the text from your friend at least a hundred times.

Kugisaki and Yuuji were essential for your plan to work, they helped you with everything. Both of them practically watched Megumi fall in love with you over the phone and, when you started a long-distance relationship, your boyfriend introduced you to his friends.

And they became your friends.

So now, with the Holidays coming and the need to be close to your boyfriend, to see and touch him for the first time, you’d decided to surprise him by traveling all the way to Japan.

But at that moment, standing in front of his apartment door, you wonder if that was a good idea.

Sure, you were in a long-term relationship and Megumi always expressed how badly he wanted to meet you in person. But what if you came at a bad time? What if he didn’t mean it?

Closing your eyes, you pushed all the bad thoughts aside and knocked on the door, feeling your blood freezing from anxiety as you let yourself think about how close you were.

Breathing the same air.

How would he react? Would he like your appearance in person? Would he kiss you like he told you he would – multiple times? Would he…

Your thoughts were suddenly interrupted when the sound of the door being unlocked sounded, and you held your breath.

Within seconds, Megumi Fushiguro was in your eyesight.

His eyes widened instantly and, for almost a minute, he just stood there, looking at you as if you were a figment of his imagination.

You wondered if he could hear your fast-paced heartbeat, thumping loudly in your ears as your eyes filled with tears. Megumi wore a simple white tee with black sweatpants, his hair messy the same way you had always seen in pictures when he’d just woken up.

“Megumi…” you start, trying not to cry. Your emotions felt too strong to hide, “I came to spend Christmas with you, surprise!”

You tried to sound confident, but you still didn’t know how he felt about the entire situation and he just kept looking at you.

“I’m sorry if this is too sudden! I know I shouldn’t have come without saying anything first but I wanted to surprise you, and now looking back it really sounds like a stupid idea,” you started rambling nervously. “But I can stay with Kugisaki if this is too much, or even rent a–”

Putting a definite stop to your talking, Megumi said your name.

You didn’t have time to think about what was happening when you felt his hands on your cheeks, and then his lips pressed against yours.

Megumi kissed you like he missed you, like it was the first time, and also the last. He held your face gently and your own body responded to him; your hands moving to his hair and neck. And you fit like you were always meant to be together.

He broke the kiss leaving little pecks on your lips, and his eyes were on yours. Watching, dreamy.

“Gumi… you're not mad?”, you whispered, his hands still on your face, caressing it.

“This is the best gift I could’ve asked for.”