#s158

Scratch really doesn't get it at all, does he?

Yes, Scratch, Slick absolutely does want to kill Snowman - but I encourage you to examine your assumption that he can't also want to kiss her.

You see, the problem is that when the subject of Carapacian romance is broached, your considerable puppet intellect-

EB: do you know if rose is ok? EB: did it work??? CG: SHE'S FINE. CG: SHE WOKE UP ALIVE ON DERSE.

And she’s still Horrorterror-boosted, which is not a good sign. Evidently, even death wasn’t enough to break her dark pact, and it's clear the Gods aren't done with her yet.

Hey, at least she’s no longer in Grimdark Mode. I’ll take my victories where I can get ’em.

CG: THAT'S THE RULE, JOHN. YOU KISS A DEAD PLAYER IN TIME, AND THEIR DREAM SELF TAKES OVER, ASSUMING THEY STILL HAVE ONE. […] EB: it would not have worked on my dad then? EB: or rose's mom… :( […] CG: IS THAT YOUR GAME, EGBERT. HAVE YOU HAD YOUR EYE ON MADAME LALONDE, AND YOU'VE BEEN WAITING FOR A CONVENIENT RESURRECTION OPPORTUNITY TO BUST OUT YOUR MOST PASSIONATE SMOOCHMOTIFS KEPT IN RESERVE? […] EB: i am frankly pretty upset about finding them dead in the magic castle, and i guess i was wondering aloud if something could have been done.

Hang on, let me whip out the ol' Johnspeak translator again.

CG: WE CAN'T HAVE YOU GETTING ALL MOROSE WHILE WE'VE GOT SO MANY IRONS IN THE FIRE. CG: FUCK, LOADED PHRASE, FORGET I SAID THAT.

Pfffft

So Karkat took on Gamzee, and lived to tell the tale? Color me extremely impressed.

Upon reflection, it makes a sort of sense that Karkat would be able to counter Gamzee's mind games. A huge part of Gamzee's threat is his sheer intimidation factor - but if Karkat managed to work himself up into one of his classic ragefits, he might simply have been too angry to be intimidated.

CG: OK, I'M DONE HERE. TALK TO YOU IN ONE SECOND FOR ME, ONE LONG WINDY FUCKING JOURNEY FOR YOU. carcinoGeneticist [CG] ceased trolling ectoBiologist [EB] carcinoGeneticist [CG] began trolling ectoBiologist [EB] […] CG: LET'S GET DOWN TO BUSINESS. EB: aren't you going to ask me how my journey was? CG: NO. EB: it was long! and windy. but a lot of fun. EB: i really like flying, it's so much fun.

EB: is something wrong? […] EB: a while ago you talked to me and it sounded like you were in danger, and it sounds like some people died, but you never told me what happened! […] CG: A BUNCH OF US DIED, THE END. CG: I DON'T REALLY WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT. […] CG: [..] AND NOT JUST BECAUSE, OH, THE CLOCK IS RAPIDLY TICKING DOWN TO SOMETHING WE'RE CALLING THE CRITICAL MOMENT, AND NO, I DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT IS, SO CLOSE YOUR REEKING QUESTION GEYSER BEFORE IT ASKS. EB: but, i'm your friend. aren't i? CG: OH GOD. EB: well? CG: JOHN, I CAN'T HANDLE TALKING ABOUT IT, OK.

But notably, you did not deny that he's your friend.

I think we're past that, by now. Karkat's finally willing to admit, implicitly, that he's pretty fond of this guy.

CG: I JUST GOT DONE CG: UH CG: DEALING WITH GAMZEE CG: AND I'M FEELING PRETTY EMOTIONAL ABOUT IT.

Furthermore, I don't think it's a coincidence the moment John asserted their friendship, Karkat actually started to open up a little. <3

CG: GAMZEE WAS MY VERY GOOD FRIEND, WHO WAS THIS GOOFY LOVEABLE BULLSHIT CLOWN UNTIL HE WENT PSYCHO AND KILLED SOME PEOPLE. I LIKED HIM A LOT. […] EB: so he killed some people… and then what? CG: SO THEN I EB: it's ok, you can tell me. CG: JOHN, TRUST ME. YOU WOULDN'T UNDERSTAND. CG: IT'S JUST A TROLL THING, HUMANS WOULDN'T GET IT.

I don’t think you’re giving John enough credit, here. He’s just told you that he already knows about Vriska’s murders, and they were a lot less justifiable than yours.

Not even a Green Sun weapon can put a dent in Jack. The Streetsweeper is probably closer in strength to a Uranium Imp - undeniably powerful, but still a far cry from true divinity.

EB: karkat! […] EB: why are you snooping around her computer! CG: BECAUSE CG: WOW OK CG: SO LET ME ASK. CG: DID YOU BOTH ACTUALLY LIKE EACH OTHER. […] CG: LIKE I MEAN SOMETHING VAGUELY RESEMBLING ACTUAL GENUINE MUTUAL SENTIMENT OR WHATEVER, NOT SOME LOPSIDED PINING BULLSHIT. EB: what are you talking about? CG: DID YOU LIKE HER, YOU WINDSOCK HEADED SHITMOUTH.

You’ve wormed your way out of similar questions before, but that’s not an option this time.

Come on, John. The shippers need to know.

EB: well… EB: yeah. why?

Huh.

Well, there you go, I guess. I honestly thought it was more likely that John just wanted to be friends with her - but no, there really was a spark of romance there. We'll never know how it would have ended, because it didn't have a chance to get started, but there could have been something between the two.

CG: THAT'S FINE CG: THEN CG: WE'LL TALK ABOUT IT LATER. EB: talk about what? CG: I NEED YOU TO BE ABLE TO THINK STRAIGHT.

I think it’s very clear what Karkat’s implying here.

John's not stupid, but he is more than willing to shove uncomfortable truths into the vault. He's already repressed his Dad's death, and will undoubtedly do the same with Vriska's.

Fucking hell, Doc!

I guess when he snaps, he snaps hard. Did losing the clock really piss him off this much, or is even this part of his grand plan?

Heh. Dave knows what’s up.

The Blackout’s still up, then. I expected it to have died alongside Rose, but I guess there's still some residual Horrorterror energy in the area.

CG: LEAVE NOW, I'LL CONTACT YOU IN A WHILE, ONCE YOU'VE LANDED. EB: landed where? CG: LOHAC. OBVIOUSLY. EB: oh, obviously. CG: WELL HOW ELSE DO YOU THINK YOU'RE GOING TO CAUSE THE SCRATCH, IDIOT. CG: DO YOU EVEN HAVE ANY CLUE WHAT'S GOING ON? CG: WAIT, OF COURSE YOU DON'T, YOU ARE WEARING PAJAMAS AND GIGGLING AT CLOUDS LIKE EACH ONE WAS SHAPED LIKE THE RUDEST BIT OF NAKED ANATOMY A HUMAN CAN RECOGNIZE.

I’m usually sympathetic to Karkat’s crabbiness, but even I have my limits, and I'm sure John's approaching his. The poor kid's dad just died, and he does not need this bullshit right now.

Honestly, I kind of hope he falls apart emotionally, once the current crisis is dealt with. The alternative would be for him to keep repressing things indefinitely - and the longer he holds it all in, the harder it's going to be to let it all out.

Is that a Fraymotif? Let’s go!

Adagio denotes a song with a slow tempo, and redshift is a phenomenon where the speed of an object's movement through space alters its perceived color. It’s fantastic name for a Time/Space Fraymotif.

Just as an added bonus, one of the main applications of redshift is to measure the relative velocities of distant stars - so it's doubly fitting for this fight against a star-powered supervillain.

I sometimes forget that Scratch is still speaking to us from one of Alternia’s moons.

Jesus, Dave! I know Terezi was getting on your case about not facing your own mortality, but this feels like a serious overcorrection!

I guess you already knew it was part of the Alpha Timeline, so you didn't really have a choice. But even so, what does it say about Dave's mental state that he was actually able to go through with this? To pretend to Jade that everything was fine, when his body's outline had already been drawn in chalk?

He can multitask!

Anyway, that's my theory solidly confirmed. Scratch is hiring Spades Slick to assassinate the universe, unwittingly summoning Lord English in the process. I can only assume that Scratch, for some reason, is unable to kill Snowman himself.

It’s still unexplained how any of this is possible in the first place, though. Why, exactly, was a Black Queen chosen to be the universe's detonation switch? What exactly is the nature of her connection to the Alternian Genesis Frog, and how was it forged?

EB: did she kiss him too? :O CG: YEAH. […] CG: HE WOKE UP ALIVE ON DERSE, AND MET WITH ROSE. CG: THAT WAS THE END OF THE LINE FOR ALPHA DAVE. TO MY KNOWLEDGE, HE DOESN'T TIME TRAVEL AFTER THAT, AND HE AND ROSE STAY ON DERSE WAITING FOR THE BOMB UNTIL YOU START THE SCRATCH. […] CG: REGARDLESS, HIS JOB IS TO PLOT A COURSE THROUGH THE RING TO FIND THE SUN. CG: WHEN HE DOES, EITHER HE OR ROSE WILL DELIVER THE BOMB. CG: I DON'T KNOW WHICH.

My money's on Rose.

See I don't expect either Derse kid to die for good here, and Rose seems to have the greatest chance of survival. Both the blondes have lost their Dream Selves, but Rose still has the support of the Horrorterrors, and, with their help, has temporarily resisted Green Sun energy before.

What is it with First Guardians and making Jade shoot her loved ones?

The deudlyest firearm at all.

I guess I shouldn't be surprised that Scratch is a SBaHJ fanboy. He is Cal’s son, after all.

CG: WE WERE TALKING ABOUT SOMETHING IMPORTANT. CG: ROSE, REMEMBER. […] CG: SHE IS WAITING ON DERSE FOR YOUR BOMB TO BE DELIVERED. […] EB: how do you know it gets there? CG: JADE TOLD ME. […] CG: I TALKED TO HER ACROSS PRETTY MUCH THE FULL SPREAD OF HER TIMELINE, UNTIL THE SCRATCH STARTS AND THE FEED CUTS OUT. […] CG: ANYWAY, SHE AND DAVE DO A LOT OF FROG BREEDING, ACCELERATING THE PROCESS SIGNIFICANTLY BY EXPLOITING TIME TRAVEL, WITH HELP FROM ME AND KANAYA, SINCE WE WERE IN CHARGE OF FROG DUTIES IN OUR SESSION.

Sounds like Jade is actually going to pull off the tadpole speedrun. I suppose she is being mentored by a frog breeding veteran, which must be an extraordinary rare privilege in sessionspace.

Interesting that Kanaya and Karkat were in charge of frog duties. Jade's getting help from Dave, but that's because he's a time traveler, and it doesn't sound like Aradia contributed at all. I did speculate that Blood could be the Aspect of genetics, though, so maybe I was actually on the mark there, and Karkat turned out to be particularly good at sequencing frog genes, or something.

EB: wait, which one is kanaya again? […] CG: OK, KANAYA IS MY OTHER BEST FRIEND, AND SHE WAS THE HERO OF SPACE LIKE JADE WHICH MEANS SHE'S THE STOKER OF THE FORGE AND IS BASICALLY IN CHARGE OF FROGS, WHICH SOUNDS RETARDED, I KNOW. YOU BREED THE RIGHT FROG TO MAKE THE UNIVERSE YOU WANT TO MAKE, WHICH IS A LONG ARDUOUS PROCESS AND I KIND OF FUCKED IT UP IN MY GAME, BUT THAT'S A WHOLE OTHER STORY WHICH I'LL GET TO LATER, OK?

That’s new.

Sure, the kids' session is a mess, but I we've been given no prior indication that there are issues with their universe as well.