#rubyroseisms

Yang: Ruby I think it’s time we tell you about the bird and the bees

Ruby: That they can both fly?

Yang: *knows she’s serious* .....Nope I can’t do it. She’s too precious

Weiss: Well when people like each other very much

Ruby: They share cookies?

Weiss: ......... *gets up and whispers as she walks away* I can’t ruin that innocent and adorable little dolt

Blake: What’s important is to always be safe when you’re with someone

Ruby: Nothing says “Don’t mess with me.” like a combat skirt!

Blake: *quietly goes to her bed and goes back to her book*

Ruby: What does any of this have to do with birds or bees? Do they like each other?

WBY: STOP BEING SO CUTE!

Nora: *gasp* RUBY!!!!! *tackles to ground*

Jaune: *light chuckle, pat on the back* Hey, Rubes, good to see ya.

Pyrrha: Thank you! *squeezes tight*

Ruby: *backing up* No no no no no! I know that look! You have another pun!!!

Yang: Relax sis. I just want to know what kind of bagel can fly

Ruby: NONE! I KNOW IT’S A PUN! *tries to run away*

Yang: A plain bagel! 

Ruby: *not so sneakily hiding behind a doorway* .......I WANTED TO BE ROMANTIC BUT IT WOULDN’T FIT!!

Penny: Is this a proposal for marriage?

Ruby: YES AND IT’S RUNINED BECAUSE STUPID SODA CANS LIDS AREN’T BIG ENOUGH AN-

Penny: *hugs Ruby* I would love to

Ruby: *hugs back* I love you

Weiss: What is it Ruby?

Ruby: You’re smart! What time should I go to bed?

Weiss: We’re on winter break. It doesn’t matter whe-

Ruby: No! Dad says the kids need to be sleeping for Santa to visit but I don’t know what time he’d get here so I don’t know when I need to go to bed

Weiss: ........I don’t know why I’m surprised you still believe i-

Yang: *bursts through the dorms door and knocks Weiss out in one punch*

Ruby: YANG!? WHAT WAS THAT FOR!?

Yang: She was going to feed you lies! Blake is smart! ask her!

Ruby: Ok bu-

Yang: Trust me.