#ruby sela

No, not missing. She had to be on Green Bit. That’s where they agreed to meet if they hadn’t met on the shore. Ruby was smart and skilled, she was very good at what she did and had spent years avoiding marines, pirates, and the World Government. She was just late once again. He was going to lecture the shit out of her when they were alone.

The bridge was exactly as Ruby described, aside from the mysterious small voice that drug the fish away. Ruby had mentioned the ridiculous notion of fairies in the town. She even said that something of hers went missing more than once but Law just assumed that she was being an airhead and misplaced it. 

God, he would love to see that airhead on Green Bit in her heels and short skirt.

But, as fate would have it, she wasn’t on Green Bit either. 

Where was she?

His heart sped up in anxiety. He winced when it squeezed in pain. The damn thing was being a hassle. He had repaired the tear! He had gotten three days of rest. He should be fine!

Fucking Vergo.

Law hadn’t planned on that bastard showing up and his heart ended up the loser in that scuffle. He gritted his teeth, trying to mask the pain as he stood on the shore with Ceasar, waiting for Doflamingo.

Ruby was going to murder him when she found out about his heart. Not that he minded. Them giving back each other’s hearts was the best decision he’s made in a while. He remembered her hurt but understanding face when he told her that they’d have to switch them out again. At least on his list of fuck ups, that wasn’t one of them. 

Of course to make matters even worse, this was a trap. Doflamingo never resigned from the Warlords. So what was he supposed to do now? His plan had failed and Ruby was nowhere to be seen.

Law’s eyes widened and his stomach dropped. Sweat rolled down his cheek and he ignored Nico-ya as she popped up from the ground.

Shit.

Doflamingo had to have done something to Ruby. There was no doubt in his mind now. It was all starting to come together. Ruby wasn’t at either meeting point and hadn’t called him to explain anything. She may be someone who was the opposite of punctual, but she always, always tried to keep him in the loop. She was a woman who loved talking and sometimes it took him taking her face in her hands and squeezing her cheeks to get her to just be quiet for five minutes. 

Only now he wished she was talking his ear off. Makeup, chocolate, raunchy novels, anything . He just wanted to hear her voice again. He needed to see the light in her eyes as she spoke about things that he didn’t care about but was willing to entertain because it was her .

 Dammit. Dammit. Dammit !

He knew he should have never agreed to her stupid fucking plan. He should have overruled her, he should have tied her up and kept her on the Tang as she bitched and moaned, he should have done absolutely anything to keep her away from this island and Doflamingo. How could someone as clever as Ruby be caught? How could Doflamingo find her? She knew how to stick to the shadows in any situation. How was this possible?!

Law let out a breath that was close enough to an almost sob. He clenched Ceasar’s clothes in his fist and jerked him in anger. The idiot complained but Law didn’t care. 

Just to make sure, just to be safe. He stared down at the den den mushi . He needed to rule out Ruby being kidnapped. If she had been kidnapped then she would be used as bait, as a weakness, as a hostage situation. She was a valuable asset and Doflamingo probably understood that. He would use her to get to him and Law needed that not to happen.

He knew Ruby could take care of herself, surely if she was captured she would find a way out. Surely this was just a minor setback. There’s no way she would do anything that would harm this plan. Law took a deep breath and started to call her when Nico-ya interrupted him.

Law snapped back to reality. He needed to focus on himself rather than endless ideas and possibilities of their situation. He saw Doflamingo and realized he was out of time. Nico-ya disappeared and Law took a deep breath. 

Focus on this meeting. Focus on the plan. Focus on making sure that he could correct any mistake that had already happened.

“Ruby,” he sighed. He held his injured arm and gritted his teeth in pain as it screamed at him. “I have to do this.”

“You don’t have to do shit, ” she snapped and Law saw a fury in her eyes that he had fallen for long ago. The anger and rage died in her eyes in moments and was replaced by desperation and fear. “I can’t lose you. I can’t…” Her voice shook and she blinked away tears. “You’ve done enough, mo chuisle. I’m begging you to just rest .”

“ Please let me do this,” he begged her. He reached out with his good arm and cupped her cheek. He leaned in and kissed her forehead slowly. “I love you,” he whispered. “I love you,” he said again, a lump forming in his throat. He wanted to tell her over and over that he loved her. He wanted this to be over. He wanted to hold her. He wanted their injuries and pain to fade away. This never should have happened. 

“I love you, too,” she whispered. Law leaned down and kissed her lips. The first taste of her in months, and the taste of blood was heavy on her tongue. He frowned deeply and pulled away. “Law,” she said desperately. “I just got you back, I can’t handle losing you.”

Law rubbed her cheek with his thumb. “I won’t die,” he said. “I just have to do this, Ruby. This is almost over, just believe in me for a little bit longer.”

Law watched Ruby fight a battle within herself. He could see her fiery anger and stubborn nature try to duke it out with the reasonable and calm thoughts. She stared at him with tears in her eyes and blood on her cheeks, so clearly hating what he was doing. And she was right. If their roles were reversed he would have never allowed her to do what he was trying to do. 

He always teased her about being a sensitive cry baby, that she went with her emotions too often instead of rational thought, but right now he understood. He understood how fucked this situation was, how tired she was, how badly he wanted to just lay with her once more. 

But as he watched her take a deep breath and straighten her back, he knew what she was about to say.

“Okay,” she sighed out. He pulled her in for another kiss, just a simple, chaste kiss. They laid their foreheads against each other for a moment before pulling away. “I trust that you will come back to me.”

“If I don’t, you can take my skull and put it on your mantelpiece in your seaside cottage. Label it as “a man who wouldn’t listen to his girlfriend.””

She let out a short laugh. “I can do that.”

Law pulled away from her and frowned at the blood on her face. He stared at her; clothes ripped, hair a mess, dirt, blood, and injuries covering her body. He took her in before closing his eyes slowly. She was here. She really was here. If he did anything right today it would be making sure she survived. He took a deep breath and steeled himself. He opened a room and opened his eyes. “I love you,” he told her one last time. 

“I love you, too.”

Her brows twitched and furrowed. Who would be bothering her now? Everyone she knew was either still asleep or already at their jobs. She approached the door. Her body shook with anxiety, her brain sending signals to her to not open the door, to run away. She swallowed, cursing her anxiety and opened the door.

Her eyes widened and a cold sweat rolled down her face. Her body shook and she let out a breath that was close to what could have been her stifling down a cry for help.

Doflamingo stood outside her apartment door, grinning at her. No wonder her brain told her to leave. 

“Sela D. Ruby, I believe-”

She closed the door on Doflamingo casually. There was a moment of silence before her door burst into pieces. Ruby ran to the window and jumped out of it, not caring about the shattered glass. She landed on the ground and ran down the street, ignoring the screams and shouts and shocked gasps, instead focusing on the amused laughter that followed her. She felt his strings pass through her body and she quickly turned a corner...only to fall flat on her face. The bastard tripped her with haki coated string. 

“A logia! Now it makes sense why Law would have you as a spy.” Ruby glared up at the obnoxiously tall man. “I’ve let you live on this island for a month now-” Ruby swallowed –she’s been here for almost two, so she managed to get by on her own long enough. “But now it’s good to see that Law is on his way, too.” Ruby’s glare hardened and she stood up, brushing off her clothes. “Tell me, what’s Law’s plan?” Ruby didn’t answer. “If you tell me, I might just let both of you live.”

“Bullshit,” she snapped. “Law told me what happened; I’m no idiot. However, if you think I’ll believe you’ll let either of us live, you certainly are.” 

He snickered. “You’re unbelievably incomprehensible.” He talked down to her. “I still saved the Heart Seat for him! You wouldn’t even have to leave him and could be part of his army.” What a universe that would be. “We could always use a powerful logia on board.” Patronizing ass. 

Ruby lifted her middle finger up and stuck her tongue out. “I’d rather die than call you my captain, Doflamingo.” She reacted immediately, turning her arm into wood and covering it in armament haki . His strings hit her arm, sending sparks flying.

“You’re fast.” 

“I am Law’s spy; he wouldn’t just send me to look pretty,” she pushed away his strings before throwing her Sceana Duille at him. A small cut appeared on his cheek and he looked mildly annoyed. She ran off and he followed after her, manic laughter filling the alley. There was no way she could meet Law and the Straw Hat’s at the meeting point now. She could only buy him time and pray that he could get to her before…

Ruby knew that her and Law’s relationship wasn’t perfect or amazing or sweet or…well anything particularly normal, but! their relationship was definitely better than Doflamingo’s. Absolutely. Completely.

Yeah.

Ruby literally rolled out of bed. She laid on the shitty carpet, her cheek pressed onto the floor. She let out a very loud groan, one that Law would definitely express his annoyance at. She could practically hear his scoff and beration.

Act like an adult. She could hear him say.

She huffed, getting annoyed at him for being annoyed at her in this fake scenario where he was with her in that moment instead of on Punk Hazard doing god knows what with that Caesar Clown.

She wouldn’t know of course. She hasn’t spoken to him in over a month.

A whole goddamn month.

Not a sentence or word or even a strained breath as she tried not to cry.

Nope. Nothing.

Because they needed to be “safe”. They needed to be “quiet”. They needed to be “discreet”.

Which was, of course, the correct path. Law was right. She hated admitting to him that he was right. The smug bastard and his ego that she unfortunately found quite hot and attractive and she definitely wanted to kiss his stupid lips.

“UUUUGHHHHHH,” she let out an incredibly loud groan and slammed her hands on the cheap carpet that smelled of cigarettes. “I’m so annoyed at him!”

She had moved on from severe depression to absolute fury.

Anger at Doflamingo. Anger at Corazón. Anger at Law. Anger at herself. Why in all of the layers of hell did she decide to do this? To leave her nakama and safety? To come to this damn island that was so happy and joyous and thrilling. Where the people were so kind as long as you didn't cheat on them.

And sure the toys were creepy but…she supposed they weren’t so bad.

And it was nice and sunny most of the time. Wonderful weather, actually. Maria had dragged her to many outdoor parties and to clubs that had a dance floor on roofs. Ruby usually felt so guilty about going to these things when she needed to be laying low that she barely had fun.

When had she become such a drag? She would have lived for this type of island in her early twenties. She would have partied all night, drank all night, probably found some random person and slept with them for a portion of the night!

Oh, she was so angry. So, so angry.

She didn’t want this island destroyed. She wanted Law to drop this whole scheme and leave this island alone. These people didn’t deserve this island destroyed because Doflamingo was an awful, terrible, shitty person.

If he would just see what she saw, if he would just feel what she felt, he would understand. He couldn’t be so wrapped up in his revenge that he would hurt…

Oh, fuck her, of course he would hurt people. He was a pirate and not a good person. His epithet was The Surgeon of Death.

And it’s not that she was an angel either. She’s hurt people. She’s killed people. But…

She’s changed! The Heart Pirates changed her. Her wonderful crew, who were full of somewhat kind people! Right?

Well, no, that’s not true is it?

They were pirates.

They hurt people.

They weren’t just having fun on the sea, were they? Sure they weren’t raping and pillaging, but, damn, they weren’t really great people. Goofy? Funny? Having fun? Sure!

But, no, they were pirates.

Had Ruby grown tired of pirating? Had she began to resent the sea, her home? She loved Law, she loved her crew, but she was tired.

She placed her palms on the ground and lifted herself up. She sat cross legged on the ground, her bare back cracking as she leaned forward. She sat down, in her grey sweat shorts, and sighed.

“Guess I’ll take something for the headache and eat breakfast,” she mumbled like she had a hangover despite not having one.

She stood up and started to get ready for the day. She threw on a camisole and slipped on fuzzy slippers. She threw her long hair up in a bun and then brushed her teeth in her tiny bathroom.

She had finished her yogurt and was sipping her fucking terrible coffee when she heard a loud cheer from outside. She walked to the window and stared out of it.

There was a parade.

Floats, balloons, clowns, dancers, confetti, food. It was so very bright and joyful. And fun, she supposed. Not for her, of course. She was bitter and hated Doflamingo and Lucia. They were terrible, evil people.

She sighed and started to walk away from the window when the largest float caught her eye. Her breath hitched and she hid behind the curtain.

“Shit,” she hissed. “What a fucking dumbass move, Ruby.”

Of course Doflamingo would be on the float celebrating him. She peered through the curtain and saw the obnoxiously pink feather coat. Her heart sped up and her stomach clenched in anxiety. If he saw her…

She looked over the float and blinked when she saw a tall woman in an elegant dress. Ruby did her best to get a clearer view of her without showing herself.

That was Lucia.

She was tan. She had long black hair. She was very tall. Not as tall as Doflamingo but still quite tall.

She looked quiet and serene. Like the celebration meant nothing to her. Ruby wondered if it was because she didn’t want to be around the citizens, not enjoying being around those beneath her station. Royalty tended to be like that.

But she was quite beautiful. At least from what Ruby could see.

Then again Ruby’s boyfriend was also tall, tan, and had black hair. Ruby wondered what Lucia’s eye color was but wouldn’t dare leave her flat to find out.

She huffed and closed the curtain. She was no longer interested in seeing a celebratory parade and had definitely cut it too close by watching what little she had.

She placed her mug in the sink and filled it with water. She let out a long sigh before placing her hands on her hips. Once the parade was over she would…what would she do?

Perhaps she would go to a restaurant. She knew there was no way she could grocery shop. It was her fault for being an idiot and not buying groceries before she ran out of food.

There would be plenty of events to keep her busy, a ton of food, but she probably shouldn’t leave the flat. If the Family was out today, then she could be caught. She was sure that they would recognize her. If she had been just some random pirate then they wouldn’t have cared, but she was a pirate on Law’s crew.

She was a pirate on Law’s crew, who had a bounty, and who also destroyed a slave trade that Doflamingo had owned. She also killed Knotely but she doubted Doflamingo cared about him.

At best, Ruby was an annoyance. At worst, and this one was probably closest to the truth, she was a weakness for Law and would be used against him.

She sighed and walked to the bed and collapsed on it. She would stay in and read the new romance books she bought the other day. She would make a cheap meal with the rest of the rice and some seasoning that she had. She would stay safe, she would stay hidden, and she would stay quiet.

Ruby sat on the bed as she reached the end of her second novel. The sun was setting in the distance, turning the sky all sorts of pretty colors. The celebration was still going strong. Cheers and music and happy people.

She sighed and closed the book. She laid back on the bed and stared at the ceiling.

“This sucks,” she said. “Really fucking sucks.” She laid on her side and looked out of the window. “Maybe I’ll just fall asleep. I have some sedatives left.” She reached over to the nightstand and grabbed the bag of pills when there was a knock on the door.

Her skin pricked in fright as she stared at the bag of pills. Who was at her door? Was it Doflamingo? Was it Maria? Did Law somehow make it Dressrosa and completely ignored the plan they had set up for their meeting!

Ruby got out of bed, her heart racing. She walked to the door, her hands shaking as she looked out the peephole. She immediately relaxed.

She opened the door and smiled at her neighbor.

“Julia,” she greeted. “How can I help you?”

“Ah!” The very small older woman grinned. “I came by to give you this!” She shoved a paper plate covered in foil into Ruby’s hands. “I know how hard it is to enjoy celebrations when you’re grieving. I thought that since you may not want to enjoy the parties today that I might bring you something to have a…private celebration.”

“Oh,” Ruby said, her throat squeezing as she tried not to cry. “Thank you. This is…this is very kind of you,” she said.

“You’re welcome,” she said and turned. “Have a great rest of your evening.”

Ruby closed the door and breathed. She smelled the garlic in the dish and her mouth watered. Rice really wasn’t enough to sustain her. She stood at the counter eating her chicken with such energy that she was certain that Julia had put some sort of magic in it.

After she finished the food she took a shower. She washed her face, brushed her teeth, brushed her hair. She laid on the bed in her grey shorts, stretching her arms and breathing.

She laid back onto the pillows and closed her eyes. The food that she was giving had settled into her stomach and she felt good enough that she would fall asleep.

And she almost had.

She had begun to drift off when her den den mushi rang. She blinked open her eyes and stared at it.

“Why is he calling?” She muttered.

She reached for the snail on her nightstand and took in a breath.

“Hello?” She answered.

“Ruby,” Law’s hushed voice said. “Are you alone?”

Ruby swallowed. “Yeah,” she breathed. “Are you?”

“…somewhat.”

Her brows scrunched together and she stared at the snail. “What does that mean?”

“I left Punk Hazard,” he said and took in a shaky breath. Ruby knew that breath.

“Why are you hurt?” She asked.

“That’s not important,” he said. “I’m on my way to Dressrosa,” he said. “With…allies.”

“Allies?” She questioned. “Who?”

Law was silent for a moment. “The Straw Hats.”

“The who?!” Ruby shot out of bed.

“Pipe down,” he hissed. “It’s a long story,” he sighed. “One that I’m too tired to go into right now,” he huffed and then a small hiss came from his mouth in pain.

“Law,” she said softly. “You’re in pain.”

“I’ll be fine,” he croaked. “I can handle this.” He sighed. “I’ll be there in about three days, according to Nami-ya,” he said. “I’ll meet you at the port we discussed.”

“Okay,” she said, her heart leaping out of her chest. “I-I…I missed your voice,” she admitted. “I missed you.”

He sighed. He didn’t respond for some silent moments. “I missed you, too,” he whispered. “I won’t speak to you again until I’m there. So continue to lay low until I do.”

“I will,” she said with a nod. “Get some sleep, Law, you sound like you need it.”

“I do,” he said with a half chuckle. “Ruby,” he breathed. “I love you. I hope you understand that. I love you more than…” he trailed off. “Well, it doesn’t matter. I’ll be there soon. Good night.”

He hung up.

Ruby stared at the snail and heard the dial tone through the speaker. She swallowed and let out a breath.

He knew he hadn’t always been good to her. He knew that he could be a complete asshole to her and she had given him far more chances than he truly deserved. He also knew that she was very much out of his league, especially when she always made herself up so beautifully and he looked like he hadn’t slept in days and only had coffee and indeterminate drugs to keep him chugging along.

There were probably tons of men and women in Dressrosa vying for her attention. She probably had already been proposed to. He wouldn’t blame her if she ran off on him, releasing the den den mushi into the wild and leaving him and their plan behind. Maybe she would finally find someone worthy of her, of her smile and her laughter. Someone who didn’t make her cry in despair or anger. Someone who didn’t drag her down into the deep, cold depths of unmistakable fury and sorrow.

She deserved so much better than him.

But he loved her. He loved her so completely, so fully. So deep within his soul that he would never be the same without her, he would never be able to move on. His heart would always be hers, even if she didn’t want it anymore.

He turned on his side and stared at where Ruby should be sleeping. It was her spot. Her pillow was still where it belonged. 

“Law,” Ruby mumbled into her pillow one morning. He hummed and pulled her in closer, burying his face in her thick air. He palmed her stomach, pushing his hand under her tank top. “Why are you still here?” She yawned. “I figured you’d be half a pot of coffee in by now.”

He breathed her in. “I want to spend some time with you,” he admitted.

She grabbed his wrist and pulled his arm around her. He curled into her, kissing the back of her neck through her hair. “I feel so spoiled.”

“You should,” he said with a smile. “I don’t like missing out on the first pot of coffee.”

“Yes, I know. There’s nothing you love more than the first sip of black coffee unspoiled by milk or sugar.”

Law opened his eyes and stared into Ruby’s chocolate brown hair. She didn’t say anything more, she only relaxed against him. She laced their fingers together and let out a tired sigh. “There is something I love more than that.”

“Oh, right, Corazon, of course.”

Law opened his mouth and closed it. He frowned. How many walls and layers did she perceive herself to be behind? Did she just accept that she would never be in at least his top five most loved things? Did she think she even made the list? She was the love of his life, the woman who he slept next to every night, the woman he bore his heart and soul to. 

“You,” he tried. “I love you more.”

She was silent and she didn’t move. Did she not believe him? Was she unsure of his devotion to her? 

Of course she fucking was. How could she not be?

He had dedicated his life to revenge; to avenging his savior, to killing Doflamingo. It was his priority, it was his whole life. Ruby had just barely come into it. She had only just become one of his top priorities and after hearing about his past and his goals there was no doubt she had put herself low on the list of things that he loved.

“I see,” she said after some silence. 

He needed to be better to her.

He pulled on her, turning her so that she laid on her back. She stared up at him, blinking a couple of times. A curious look formed in her eyes and her brows knit together like she was asking him why he wanted to look at her face.

“I love you,” he said and kissed her, pressing his lips into hers. “You deserve to hear that as often as you breathe.”

Her lips formed a line and a flat look spread across her face. “And yet I’m with you,” she said. Law frowned. She sighed and a soft smile spread across her lips. “Look, I know who you are and I love you as you are. Don’t worry about changing for me. I know that I’m somewhere on your list of important things.”

“You’re high on that list.”

“Mmhmm,” she hummed and started to sit up.

He laid her down and kissed her. He kissed her with everything he was, with all of his strength and affection. He tasted her like he’d never do it again. “I love you,” he breathed onto her lips.

She chuckled. “I love you, too.”

Law was out of sorts all morning. He stared into his black coffee begging it to do something to his energy levels. Maybe even serotonin levels. Although that had even less chance of happening. When he looked into the mirror earlier that morning it was like the first time he saw himself in years. 

He looked ragged, he looked exhausted. He looked like he was some long-forgotten pathetic shell of a man who had a broken heart and was grasping at straws to beg his lover to come back just once. 

Ugh, he needs to lay off Ruby’s trashy novels. 

It had been a month and a half, or he thinks it had been. Maybe longer? Time was such a blur as of late. All he knew was that he had figured everything out. 

He did it! 

The plan was in motion! Soon he would be on Punk Hazard! He would carefully move things along so that Doflamingo would never figure everything out. Doflamingo would be dead soon!

And Ruby…

And Ruby could come home . She would go to Zou and be with the people who loved her again. She would be surrounded by love and warmth and happiness. 

And more than likely not him, but that didn’t matter. He didn’t matter like she did. Someone like her could easily find happiness again. Her quick wit and her personality was wonderful and he knew anyone and everyone would be fighting just to hold her hand. 

Law huffed into his beer. So absolutely annoyed on Ruby’s behalf. Did no one have the decency to ask if she was actually interested in them?

“Law,” Ruby called with a smile. “Don’t look so annoyed for just me.”

“How do you not find it annoying? Isn’t it insulting they only see you as something to have sex with?”

She rested her chin in her hand with a curious smile. “Does it insult you?”

“Yeah.”

“Why?”

“Why? What kind of question is that? Because you’re smart, funny, and enjoyable to be around. You’re more than a damn vagina. You deserve better than these assholes.”

Ruby’s smile softened. “Thanks, that means a lot coming from the guy I’m sleeping with.”

Law breathed into his beer glass, the glass fogging up. “You’re more than that to me.”

Her smile grew. “Hm? What’s that? I don’t think I heard you.”

He shot her an annoyed look. “Don’t push it.”

She giggled. “You’re right, I’m sorry. You’re just fun to tease and I didn’t expect you to be a jealous person.”

“I’m not jealous ,” he scoffed, offended. “I am merely annoyed that you are being seen as an object.”

“Uh-huh, not even slightly jealous that people are hitting on your girlfriend and you can’t do anything about it?” He stared at her. “Alright, fine, you’re not jealous. You’re annoyed on my behalf that I’m being objectified even though I don’t give a shit.”

He huffed and chugged his beer in annoyance. Ruby hummed and sipped from her own glass, waving off another drink being brought to her. “Why don’t you give a shit?” He asked. 

“You have seen the way I dress, right? I know you stare at my ass. People treat women who dress like I do like they’re just an appendage. I’ve learned to live with it. I can’t start throwing punches because someone doesn’t respect me. I’d have knocked out half the population by now if I did.”

Law glowered. She didn’t deserve that. She deserved better. She deserved to be treated with honor and love and respect. “Maybe I should start throwing punches.”

She snorted. “My knight in shining armor,” she teased. “How about this? We head back to the Tang.” She cocked her head with a smile. “We can just put on our pajamas and go to bed! Nothing more and nothing less.”

“Rube,” he sighed. “Are you saying that we should go home and cuddle ?”

“Well, if you’re wanting to be specific, sure.”

He stared at her for a moment. “Let’s go.”

Law shoved his dinner in his face, chewing on the spicy, crispy tofu thoughtfully. He knew Penguin was staring at him. He knew that Penguin was staring hard at him. But what was he supposed to do? Just start a conversation? That would require him to be a pleasant person.

“How was she?” Penguin asked. 

“She had been drinking.”

“Was she drunk?”

“No.”

“Tipsy?”

“She had been but had sobered up.”

Penguin hummed. “And her mental health?” Law didn’t answer. “Did you ask how she was doing?”

“Didn’t need to. She was annoyed and asking stupid questions.”

“Like?”

Law glared at him and Penguin’s lips stretched into a thin line. “She asked if I loved her.”

“So she wasn’t annoyed, she was feeling insecure. And you obviously responded with “yes, of course. I love you more than anything else and can’t wait to see you again,” right?”

Law groaned and rubbed his eyes. “Does that sound like something I would say?”

“No, but a man can dream.” Penguin sighed. “Did you at least say that you loved her?”

“ Yes .”

“Well, at least you did that. I can’t imagine how she’s feeling right now. She’s at her worst when she’s alone.”

Law sighed. Knowing her she was probably only thinking of the bad things between them. The arguments, the times where she wanted to throw him into the ocean, the times he made her cry. “I know,” he said and stood up with his empty bowl. “She’s strong. She’ll get through it.”

Penguin stared up at him. “How many times are you going to say that?”

“Until it no longer needs to be said.”

“Rube,” Law called to her softly. 

Ruby jumped and started wiping her face quickly. “Oh, I thought you had gone to sleep.” She sniffed. 

“Did you think I wouldn’t notice you leaving the bed?”

“I…no?”

Law stared at her for a moment before sighing. He walked over to her and sat down on the ground beside her. He spread a blanket over her body. She was only wearing a nightgown meaning she got dressed in a hurry. He sighed and heard a wave hit the Tang. 

Law stared at the crescent moon and listened to Ruby’s sniffles. It was a clear sky and fucking cold. He knew Ruby must be freezing. 

“Why did you come out here?” She asked quietly. 

A confused expression grew on his face. “Why wouldn’t I?”

“I…I don’t know,” she said in a watery voice. “I’m not thinking. Of course you would. You’ve caught me crying on my own more than once and sat with me all those times.”

“And why are you crying now?”

She sighed. “Everything is a bit too real.” He stared at her. “I had a moment recently, a moment where I realized that I’m happy.”

Law narrowed his eyes at her. “And that makes you sad.”

She groaned. She leaned on him and he wrapped his arm around her. “I don’t know what to do with happy,” she said. “I’ve been miserable for as long as I can remember. I had accepted that I was always going to be alone and miserable. And then you guys showed up and you made me part of your crew and I’m suddenly forced to not hide away because I have friends who care about me for some unknown reason. Months later you tell me that you want to be with me, that you enjoy being around me, that you find me attractive. And that makes me happy .”

“O…kay?”

“I don’t know how to be happy,” she said and started to cry. “It feels wrong. Do I really deserve to be happy? After everything I’ve done and everyone I’ve hurt. Do I deserve to let people love me?” She wiped the tears that wouldn’t stop falling from her cheeks. 

“Yes.” Ruby looked at him and stared. “You don’t know how to be happy? That’s fine. I will be here while you figure it out. You don’t know how to be in a relationship? Okay. We’ll take it slow and go at whatever pace you want.” He sighed. “But you deserve happiness. You deserve to relax.” He sighed. “The crew loves you, I love you, so just breathe for a moment and let yourself be loved.”

Ruby wiped her cheeks. “That was actually really kind of you to say, Law.”

“Yeah. I hated every minute of it.” She laughed. She sniffed and wiped her cheeks. She let out a loud sigh with a smile. He watched her for a moment before letting out a breath. “Do you want to go back to bed?”

“Yeah, I think I do.”

He stood up and turned to her. He held out his hand for her. She stared at it for a brief moment before placing her hand in his. He pulled her up and into him, kissing her forehead as he did. 

Law was staring at himself in the mirror again. He looked sick and dehydrated. He looked pathetic. What would Ruby say to him? She’d probably take him by the ear and nag at him until he drank some water and rested. He could see her annoyed but very concerned expression. 

“I love you. I want you to be healthy.”

Law huffed. Right. Like that would ever happen. He’d always be too skinny. He’d always look exhausted. He’d always look slightly sick. And his always was coming to an end soon. There’s no way he’d survive this ordeal, no matter how genuine his promise to Ruby was. All he could do was make sure Ruby made it back to the Tang. 

There would be no one there to save him. No friend, no partner, and certainly not anyone who cared enough about him. Ruby would be the only one and he planned on tying her up and shipping her off the island before she got a chance to even think about arguing. 

Law rubbed his face and walked out of the bathroom. He stood in his bedroom, feeling lonely. She should be painting her toenails at the table, she should have a bowl of grapes to snack on, she should look so pretty in her grey shorts and white tank top. 

But she wasn’t here. She was in Dressrosa. She had left in order to save his life, and Law was starting to realize she set off on an impossible mission.

He sat on the bed and rubbed his face in exhaustion. His eyes thrummed in a sore pain, his head hurt as the beginnings of a migraine settled into his skull, his joints ached like he had just run a marathon. 

He truly had become a pathetic excuse for a human. 

He blinked when the den den mushi rang. Why was she calling so soon? 

He walked over to the snail and picked up the receiver. He breathed out. “Ruby?”

“Yeah,” she breathed. “I have information on Green Bit.”

Law’s eyes widened and he grabbed pen and paper. He took a deep breath and readied himself. 

It’s always hard to lose someone you love, even temporarily. It wasn’t like when there had been that one guy who had been on the crew. He was an ass. He was cruel, even by Law’s standards. He had been harassing Ikkaku and Bepo, and if it wasn’t for Ikkaku decking him one day Law would have never known. Ikkaku thought she could handle it on her own and Bepo was far too timid to say anything. Law hoped he had proven to both of them that the comfort and safety of every crew member was far more important than numbers. Ruby would’ve hated that guy. She probably would have killed him.

No, this was depressing. This was missing her laugh and the way her heels clicked down the hall. Her thick accent and the way her hair got on everything. The crew was already talking about having a big reunion party when everyone was back together. Law still couldn’t bring himself to tell anyone he wasn’t sure if he would come home. There was still doubt creeping in his heart. He knew, he knew, that Ruby would try to keep them both alive, but he really couldn’t make any promises. There’s always a very large chance of him dying, of them both dying, and he couldn’t be irrational and try to say there wasn’t.

The best decision he had made was making sure his crew got to Zou. They should be safe in Bepo’s original home. They would be able to move on and find a new life where he didn’t drag them down with suicide missions. 

He heard his alarm go off and groaned. It was already morning again. Another night of no sleep. Another night of overthinking. He sighed and turned to sit up. He stared at the metal floor of the Polar Tang, his toes twitching against the cold. He ran his fingers through his hair and then rubbed his temples. He had a migraine coming on and it was definitely because he wasn’t sleeping. 

He let out a huff and stood up. He walked over to the window and stared out of it. He squinted his eyes in the early morning darkness before relaxing. Hakugan apparently had sailed them to an island. He tried to recall the islands that were nearby but came up with nothing. He wasn’t the navigator but he wasn’t sure that even Bepo knew the name of the island. There were so many on the Grand Line after all.

He dressed himself. He washed his face and brushed his teeth. He took a deep breath before leaving his empty bedroom, no naked Ruby to kiss awake. He sadly walked towards the kitchen and more specifically, the coffee pot. Caffeine was what kept him going most days, although coffee was hardly making a dent and he was running out of caffeine pills. Or someone was hiding them. He wouldn’t put it past Shachi to do something like that. 

Clione was already prepping breakfast, probably making something filled with carbs and protein since everyone would be busy running around and exploring the island. Law wasn’t interested in eating but he knew if he didn’t it would probably cause an intervention and he would be threatened by the crew saying that they would tell Ruby. So he would eat breakfast and drink his morning coffee. He would search for caffeine pills and if he couldn’t find any he would buy some from the island. That seemed like the perfect plan for the day.

As he sat at a table and nursed his coffee his crew started filing in. First it was Hakugan, wanting the second mug of coffee. Next was Jean Bart and then it was Bepo. Then they started to come in groups. Erina came in with Ikkaku, which was a relief. Law couldn’t force Ikkaku to go to her, but he really wished she would go. Ikkaku had been an absolute wreck without Ruby, and Law, being the hypocrite that he was, took care of Ikkaku instead of himself. He gave her advice that he wasn’t going to follow himself.

What he also noticed was that Jun came in by herself after everyone else. And then she sat aside by herself, not engaging in any conversation. Law pinched between his eyes. He was going to have to deal with that. 

After everyone had filled their plates and walked back to their seats, Law walked over to Jun with his plate. He sat in front of her with a flat expression. He popped a grape into his mouth and savored the taste of his girlfriend’s perfect vegetation. He sighed and ate another grape, watching irritation on Jun’s face grow.

“What do you want?” She asked quietly, knowing if she was too loud with her irritation she’d be faced with the wrath of Shachi. 

“Want?” He questioned. “I just want to sit with one of my crew members.”

“I don’t want to sit with anyone.”

“Which is why I’m sitting with you.” The irritated look on Jun’s face grew but she said nothing. “What is happening?”

“It’s none of your business.”

Law raised his brow. “Tell me,” he started. “Out of the two of us, who is the captain and who is the subordinate?”

Jun’s face grew red. She picked up her fork and pushed her eggs around. Law ate another piece of fruit, waiting for his wounded crew member to speak up. She huffed with a glare towards him.

“Why do you care?”

Law stared at her perplexed. “Because you’re a Heart Pirate.”

Jun rolled her eyes before shoving scrambled eggs into her mouth. “There’s nothing you can do,” she said while chewing. 

“Try me.” He had finished his fruit and was starting on the potatoes. 

Jun scoffed like she was a teenager and he was her father. “You really wanna know?” Her voice started to raise but she cleared her throat and quieted down. “Ikkaku…Ikkaku she…” tears filled Jun’s eyes and her bottom lip shook. Law started to understand what had happened.

“Have you two actually talked or has it just been you two being pissy and bitchy?”

Jun glared at him through her tears. “It’s not my fault she only loves Ruby.”

“So no.” He sighed and continued to eat his potatoes, silence growing between them. He had told the two of them to not make it an issue and now it was becoming one. He finished his potatoes and then looked up at Jun and her pathetically depressed expression. “You two need to sit down and have an adult and mature conversation. Don’t isolate yourself from the crew, we’ll give you space but you’re nakama , we’re here for you.”

Jun crossed her arms. “I don’t want to."

“Don’t be petulant. You two made each other happy. My girlfriend leaving shouldn’t stop that.”

Jun narrowed her eyes but said nothing. They continued their meal in silence, apparently Jun had no retort to that. Law finished off his perfectly runny eggs and wiped his mouth with a napkin. He stood up, taking his plate and mug with him. 

“Trafalgar,” Jun called him quietly. He turned to look at her with a raised brow. “What if it doesn’t work out?”

Law sighed with a frown. He didn’t really know the answer to that question. He knew how he would react if he and Ruby didn’t work out. He knew how Ruby would react if they didn’t work out. But that was him and Ruby, they were different people from Jun and Ikkaku. “We’ll see what happens if that happens. No point in immediately thinking about the worst possibility. Just try talking first.”

Great answer! He was quite proud of his masterful avoidance there. 

He walked away and placed his dishes in the sink. He turned and jumped when he saw Bepo at his side. He forgot how quiet polar bears could be.

“Bepo,” he greeted and then cleared his throat.

“Captain,” Bepo said. “You didn’t sleep again.”

Law frowned. “I’m fine,” he said. He rubbed his temples, that almost migraine coming back. “I just have a migraine. I’ll need to go to a pharmacy and pick up more pills to deal with it.” He walked behind Bepo and started to walk away, passing by concerned looking Heart Pirates.

“You’re running out because you have a migraine all of the time from not sleeping,” Bepo said as he caught up with him. He nervously wrung his paws together. Law chose not to answer that. “Let me come with you today.”

Law closed his eyes and sighed. “Okay,” he said, unable to deny Bepo anything. Law opened his eyes and saw Bepo’s ridiculously concerned stare. Law had to stop himself from rolling his eyes. “I’ll be fine.”

Bepo didn’t look like he believed him but the hope in his eyes made Law want to try. God. The two cutest members of Law’s crew had him by the heart strings. Bepo followed Law out of the cafeteria and towards the deck. Law was already ready to leave the Tang, not needing much other than Kikoku and his wallet. 

He figured that they wouldn’t stay long on this island. Everyone just needed to stretch their legs on land and maybe have a nice night in a tavern. It had been so long since they had fun in a tavern that Law barely remembered the last time they did. It seemed like they used to do it so often, but it was such a rare thing these days. 

Law guessed that he hadn’t really thought about it in months…maybe longer. Weren’t they pirates? Weren’t they supposed to get drunk on land and ruin the town? What had happened?

Law sighed. He knew that answer. Hard to go out and have fun when you’re constantly plotting your next step. Hard to enjoy yourself when your girlfriend is constantly getting hurt in some way and you want to stay home to take care of her. Hard to get drunk when you need to be sober enough to watch out for any impending threats. A lot had changed since the Heart Pirates entered the New World. Some things were for the better, some things, however, seemed to just dull the crew’s enthusiasm. 

Not that they’d ever say anything like that to Law. Not even Shachi, who had always been the hard-ass voice of reason, would argue with him over this. Law supposed he should be grateful for his crew’s sympathy, but Law never wanted to stop them from having fun. So Ikkaku had trouble talking to him about her problems, Jun had been distressed and isolating herself, and his crew had been stopping themselves from having fun because he was pulling away from everyone. Great. What else had he missed while he was in the middle of selfishness and self pity?

“Hey, Bepo,” Law called. “Let’s get everyone together tonight and go to a tavern.” It wouldn’t fix everything, but it should help his crew relax. Besides, spending as much time as he could with them is what he should be focusing on. Once Ruby was on Dressrosa and fed him the right amount of information, he would be on the way to Punk Hazard. After that…well…

“Aye aye!” Bepo saluted dramatically like Law had given him some serious order.

Law walked onto the deck and into the sun. He squinted his eyes in the bright sunlight and sighed, it was way too hot for him. If Ruby was here she would undoubtedly be sunning. He stared at her sunchair before moving to leave the Tang. Bepo caught up with him again, stating that he told Hakugan and Hakugan was going to tell Shachi and then word would spread. 

Hopefully it would cheer up the crew, especially the more depressed members. Ikkaku was the worst, of course, she was the one who threw a tantrum. It wasn’t just Ikkaku, however. Jean Bart and Penguin were both feeling down since Ruby’s departure, but they were being silent about it.

And definitely not taking it out on anyone. No, that job was reserved for Ikkaku and Jun.

Law and Bepo started to walk towards the direction of the nearby town. Of course they weren’t actually at the port. They were pirates after all and the last thing that Law needed to bring attention to the crew or, worse, a fight. So they were docked at a seemingly secluded beach. Nobody cared. They were just happy to run around on an island for a day.

The Heart Pirate captain and navigator made it to what seemed like a large town. It seemed like a relatively simple town but with busy people. Fairly standard for many islands. There were plenty of shops where the crew could shop, which would keep them entertained for the day and Law had already spotted a tavern where everyone could meet up later that night. What was next was finding a pharmacy.

He asked for directions as calmly as he could while the townsperson gaped at the walking, talking polar bear at Law’s side. He rolled his eyes and didn’t bother to thank the person before walking towards the direction that was pointed out to him. He needed to get those migraine relief pills if he was going to survive the rest of the day, let alone a night of loud music, drinking, and fun. 

After arriving at the brightly lit pharmacy he sighed and rubbed his temples. How annoying. It was warm, bright, and now there were even more bright lights in this store to make his temples want to explode. He walked in with Bepo in tow. He looked around noticing the uninterested teenager behind the counter, snacking on potato chips. He walked towards the back, ignoring Bepo staring at the chocolate bars. He easily found what he needed, scooping up armfuls of each bottle. 

He knew he looked like a crazy person as he dropped the medicine on the counter in front of the stunned pharmacy tech. He stuttered in what Law thought was protest but stopped when Bepo slid a chocolate bar onto the counter next to the mountain of pill bottles. 

The pharmacy tech snapped out of it and cleared his throat. “Is that all for you?” He asked as calmly as he could but Law knew that he was terrified of him and his stupid amount of pill bottles. 

Law looked at Bepo. “Is there anything else you need?” Bepo shook his head. Law turned back to the pharmacy tech. “This is it.”

The pharmacy tech took a deep breath. He started to count the bottles with a shaky hand and then added the chocolate bar last. “2002 berries.” Law laid down the money on the counter with no expression. “D-Do you want a bag?”

Law held back a smirk. “Yes.”

Law left with his bags of pills followed by Bepo and his chocolate bar. They walked around the town, grabbing lunch, going to a bookstore, and then going to a coffee and tea shop. Law bought a pack of coffee beans but didn’t buy any tea. Ruby had left behind plenty of tea that she had made and Law was sure nothing could ever beat the taste. He had to buy coffee because of how quickly the crew went through it. Ruby would never keep up with the Heart Pirates’ coffee intake. 

They left the store and Law stared at a crepe vendor. He blinked and looked to his side. He blinked multiple times to get rid of Ruby's image, grinning up at him. The grin that spread across her face when she was about to tell him to buy her something.  

“Captain?” Bepo called and Law blinked back to reality.

Law cleared his throat. “Let’s go back to the Tang and drop everything off.”

Bepo said nothing but the look of concern did not fade. Law chose to ignore it, not really wanting to explain that he was missing Ruby again. 

Law hadn’t realized that they had been out all day until he noticed that the sun was sinking closer to the horizon. He stared in the distance behind the Tang, looking at the vast ocean that was his home. The temperature was starting to drop and it seemed like it would be a nice evening. It would’ve been nice for a picnic to watch the sunset. Ruby would’ve liked that. She would’ve been overjoyed that he thought of her like that, as if his mind wasn’t occupied with thought of her at least 50% of the time. 

“Captain?” Bepo called him from the Polar Tang. 

Law switched to Bepo and his seemingly permanent concerned gaze. Law sighed. “I’m fine, let’s drop everything off and go to the tavern.”

It was best that they were headed to the tavern now. Law was starting to become hungry and greasy tavern food and an ale might actually cure his loneliness for a night. 

Law dropped off the bags of pills in the infirmary while Bepo dropped off the other items. Law was so lost in his thoughts about missing Ruby that he was surprised to see Jun standing in front of him with a flat look. He swallowed and then raised his brow at her.

“Did you need something?” He asked her.

She shifted. “I…don’t know…” she said slowly. 

“Why are you here? Did you know I was in here?” Jun looked uncomfortable. “Well?”

“My chest hurts,” she said with a frown. “It’s tight and hard to breathe. I dunno, maybe I’m having a heart attack.”

Law grunted. “Let me see. Get in the bed.”

Jun did so. She waited patiently while he ran his ECG test. He checked for all signs of a heart attack. Looking at his results and what Jun had told him, he had a theory. He had a feeling what this actually was so he was going to prod. Gently.

“How long have you felt like this?” He asked.

“For the past, like, 30 minutes maybe?”

Law nodded. “What all did you do today? Don’t leave out any details.”

Jun looked uncomfortable again so he raised his brow at her. She huffed. “After breakfast I went looking for Ikkaku but she had already left. She was hanging out with Jean Bart, of course. Now that Ruby isn’t here she had to hang out with the other one,” she said scathingly. She winced and then cleared her throat. “I was going to just stay on the sub today but Clione asked if I wanted to go grocery shopping together. I dunno, maybe he felt bad for me since Ikkaku didn’t want to hang out with me. I agreed and we went to go get groceries and then lunch. When we came back with groceries and were putting them away Ikkaku and Jean Bart came in. Jean Bart offered to help but Ikkaku got really quiet.” Jun frowned deeply. “Ikkaku looked like we just fucking shot her. Like putting up groceries was some goddamn crime against humanity. Clione and Jean Bart asked her what was wrong but she shook her head and said she needed to wash her face. She ran away and I followed after her.” Jun went silent. Law’s theory was starting to seem like it was a reality.

“And?” He prompted.

“I caught up with her, wanting to make sure she was okay. She wasn’t. She was crying. I asked her what was wrong and if I could help.” Jun frowned. “She yelled at me and accused me of trying to get rid of Ruby. She said she was tired of me trying to replace Ruby and that she was done with me. I was so confused and hurt. I…almost started crying because I didn’t know what else to do. That’s when my chest started to hurt. Before I could ask Ikkaku for help she walked off, saying she didn’t want to be around me anymore.” Tears filled Jun’s eyes. “I don’t even know what I did wrong! And now my chest hurts! I don’t know what to do!”

Law pinched between his eyes. “Well, I think I know what Ikkaku was on about. Did you buy any produce?”

“What? Yeah. Didn’t I say we went grocery shopping?”

“Ikkaku is upset that we’re buying produce that we don’t have because Ruby isn’t here.”

“That’s-”

“I know. Don’t worry, Ikkaku is working on becoming more emotionally stable again. Now, as for your chest, have you heard of takotsubo cardiomyopathy? Or even stress cardiomyopathy?”

“Uh, no.”

“It’s also known as broken-heart syndrome,” he said. Jun made a sour face. “Whether you like it or not you’re having heart problems because you’re stressed. You have the symptoms of it. You and Ikkaku are in a tiff. You’re getting into fights and causing each other stress. Ruby’s gone and it’s become a wedge between you two. Instead of talking it out, you’re both just arguing more.”

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

“And Ikkaku does. So you’re ignoring each other’s needs and are at each other’s throats.” Law gave her a serious look. 

“Well how do I make it stop? I hate this pain.”

“I’ll give you some aspirin and diuretics to see if that helps, but you also need to relax. I also recommend just talking to Ikkaku.”

“But I don’t want to talk about Ruby!” She shouted before wincing.

“Part of being in a relationship is talking about the shit you don’t necessarily want to talk about. Do you think I want to talk about shopping and nail polish and what fucking shampoo smells best in my hair? No, of course not. I do it anyway because it makes Ruby happy.”

“Those are not comparable.”

“Fine. Do you think I want to talk about my past? About her past? About all the bullshit we went through growing up? Of course I don’t. We have to talk about what hurts and how we can help each other. You both are being selfish for not listening to each other but for fucks sake the least you could do is listen to Ikkaku cry because she misses her best friend.” Law huffed. He walked to the cabinet and pulled out the medicine he needed to give Jun. “These should help. You’re banned from the tavern tonight. Eat a light meal and get some rest.” He looked at his pitiful crew member and held back a groan. 

“Fine,” Jun said stiffly. “Whatever you say, Captain.” Jun stood up and walked out of the room with a sniff.

Law did not hold back from groaning after she left. What a fucking mess. He can’t even keep two of his nakama from being upset at each other over something so easily fixable. 

“Captain?” He heard Bepo walk into the room. 

“Ugh, sorry, Bepo. I had to take care of Jun before-”

“I understand,” he said with a smile. “Do you still want to go out?” 

Law stared at his oldest friend and sighed with a tired smile. “Yeah, let’s go.”

Even though the tavern was loud and rowdy, and his crew was singing sea shanties and drinking until they dropped, Law read a book in a corner booth. He kept the den den mushi to his side, never letting it out of his sight. He smiled nostalgically, thinking of those early months when he and Ruby would sit in a booth together, brooding and bonding. Of course, she’d be eating her greasy food but back then she didn’t drink much.

He looked around at the crowd, the whole tavern in a tizzy. Everyone was here except Ikkaku and Jun. It seemed this was exactly what the crew had needed. A night to forget their troubles. To drink to good health and be merry. This was good.

Over the course of the night the Heart Pirates drank the tavern dry and many ended up needing to be carried home. Law, Bepo, Penguin, and Shachi walked back together. Well, Law, Bepo, and Penguin walked, Shachi was on Bepo’s back being carried because he was too drunk to see straight. He was still singing a song as they made their way back home.

“He’s drunk as a fish,” Penguin snickered. “Hope he doesn’t barf on you!”

Bepo made a disgusted noise. “Don’t say that! He might actually do it now!”

Penguin laughed and Law chuckled. “How are you feeling, Cap?”

“Fine.”

Penguin looked at him. He took off his hat and rubbed his head. “Are you sure?”

“As sure as I can be.” Law looked at Penguin’s now fully revealed face. “How are you feeling, Peng?”

He was silent for a moment. He sighed. “I miss her. I kept expecting her drunk ass to start singing in her thick as fuck accent.”

Law felt himself smile. “She could be pretty tone deaf.”

Penguin laughed and put his hat back on his head. “She sure fucking is.” He sighed. “Tonight was good. We need to start doing this more often again.”

“Yeah, we do.” Law patted Penguins back. They smiled at each other before making faces as Shachi vomited and Bepo cried.

After Penguin assured that Shachi would be safely put to bed and Law helped Bepo clean his fur, Law went to bed. He showered quickly before getting into his clean bed. He stared at the den den mushi on his desk before sighing. He had to keep telling himself that she couldn’t have made it to Dressrosa quite yet. That she would surely call when she was safe.