#roxto angst

Your brother, Ao’nung, had been overprotective for as long as you could remember. It seemed as if you two had the same argument every single day. Ao’nung absolutely refused to let you hang out with the males of the clan, only entrusting you to a few people, his mate being one of them. 

Nawi was a elegant and beautiful Metkayina girl who had always been a very well-respected clan member. Although you and Nawi had never been close growing up, the more your older brother began to bring her around, the more you had grown fond of her.  

No matter how hard she tried to calm Ao’nung down, it did not change how stubborn your bother was. He did not accept that you were old enough to make your own decisions and the fact that Tsireya had fallen for the Lo’ak, a boy from the Ometikyia clan whom he did not accept, made him even more unreasonable.

"You are not my father! I am allowed to do what I want!" You yell back at him. Both of your hands clenched into fists as Ao’nung cocks an eyebrow, arms crossed in front of his puffed chest. 

"Stop being so dramatic Y/n, I am only protecting you." 

You practically scream at him, completely in disbelief. “Protecting me from what?!” 

Nawi, who had just finished fishing, noticed the two of you arguing a couple feet away and began to walk over, silently asking herself if this would ever come to an end. 

"From other men!” Ao’nung shouts back, “I do not need them to get any ideas about touching you or worse. You will thank me for this when you are older." 

Nawi quickly pushed herself between the two of you before you could wrap your hands around Ao’nung’s throat. Unfortunately for her, seeing your brother’s mate only brought up another point on how unfair the situation was. 

"So I am not allowed to have my first kiss but it is okay for you to fuck around with Nawi before the two of you were even mated?!" 

Ao'nung hisses at you, now even more furious that you dared to bring up Nawi's name in such a way, "That was different and you know that!"

"Both of you, stop it." Nawi says quickly, glaring over at her husband then sending you a scolding glare. Ao'nung huffs, but stays silent at her command, you doing the same.

She gently takes your hands into hers and tried to loosen up your fists, not taking your words personally. She understood both sides, being the younger sister of 2 older brothers and the eldest of 2 other sisters.

"Y/n, I understand your frustration, but you two have this argument every day. Maybe we can find a solution-" 

"The solution is for her to stay away from boys!" Ao'nung interfered, earning a smack from his mate's tail against his stomach. 

"Ao’nung," She snaps at him, "You are not helping. At least try to show some empathy." Nawi hissed in a low volume, then turning back to you. 

"Why don’t you go for a walk, hm? I will stay and reason with your brother." 

You don’t answer, only ripping your hands away from hers. You stomp away still frustrated, leaving the mated couple to themselves.

The frustration did not cease to rush through your every vein as you heard Nawi trying to talk some sense into her thick-headed husband.

Almost instinctively, you head for Rotxo's marui. Without a word you walk in to find the only man you were actually allowed to talk to. Rotxo glanced up at you from his seated position, immediately knowing what had happened just from your expression. 

Rotxo had gotten his tattoos after finishing his iknimaya almost a year ago. He had not only become a very skilled hunter but was known fro being the kindest person on your whole island. When he wasn’t fishing he spent time helping out around the village. Rotxo was the only boy who made you feel comfortable, and you’d be lying if you said you didn’t find him attractive. From his tattoos to his hair, every part of Rotxo was all you could ever want in a man.

But he was Ao’nung’s best friend.

Not to mention all the Metkayina girls who practically threw themselves at his feet. You knew he would never look at you the way you looked at him. So, you ignored your feelings. For years. To you, it was better to ignore the way you felt then cause a problem.

Rotxo's eyes follow you as you silently sit down in front of him, mirroring his crossed legs as you cover your face with both hands. A soft sigh left his lips.

"Ao'nung will not let go hunting with the men, huh?" He mumbled quietly. Roxto spoke without even looking at you, his focus on tying the ends of the bracelet he had in his hands.

"Of course he will not. He says I am not allowed to go because he is not going, and he does not want me to be surrounded by guys, whom I clearly have no interest in!" You ramble with a mocking undertone.

Rotxo sighed at your complaints. Ao'nung was simply unfair. Your brother was allowed to mess up and make mistakes but you could not even let anyone be interested in you for a second.  

As you continue speaking Roxto continues to examine the bracelet before reaching out to take your hand, securing the bracelet on your wrist.

"Ao’nung is just making sure you do not get hurt, Y/n. I am sure he only wants what is best for you." He says softly as you sigh, exhaling deeply.

These words weren't just hard for you to hear, but also hard for Rotxo himself to say. Since he was Ao'nung’s best friend, Ao'nung was sure that Rotxo would never even dream of ever courting you. He was certain Rotxo had too much respect for him to even think of you in such a way, but oh was he wrong.

Seeing you made his heart flutter, the butterflies in his stomach almost starting to turn into a painful sting in his guts whenever he told himself that he could not have you. There was not a day that Rotxo didn’t think of you or your smile and every single think about you.

Ao'nung would kill him on the spot, which left him with no other option to hide his feelings for you. Sometimes it got unbearable to conceal what his heart had been screaming for. Yearning for. But what could he do? Talk to Ao'nung? Never. That was a death sentence. But it was moments like this were Rotxo was especially vulnerable.

"He does not want what is best for me! He wants the opposite of that. He is just so- argh! I hate him so much sometimes. He is totally unreasonable." You spat, your eyes almost filling up with tears at how angry you are.

"I am going to end up alone, Rotxo. Without a mate for the rest of my life. No one will ever even dream of courting me and, thanks to my brother, hardly any male has ever even looked to me, let alone talked to me.” 

Rotxo could not help but smile. You did not even know how wrong you were. His hand hesitantly reached out to your face, stroking over your pouted cheeks with care. 

"That will not happen, Y/n, I am sure of it." His voice was so gentle and soft even if his heart were about to break his bones by its heavy pounding. 

You sighed in defeat as you turned to look up at Rotxo. His beautiful blue eyes stared into yours as you felt the emotions you had tried so desperately to push down resurface once again. Blush filled your face as he looks at you with the softest expression you had ever seen a man give.  

He moved his hand away as you broke eye contact with him. You suddenly looked up at the boy scrunching your eyes together. 

"Rotxo, how is it that you do not yet have a mate? The girls in our clan adore you and since you have finished your iknimaya you should be allowed to choose a mate. Do you have anyone you like?" You question softly. 

Rotxo huffed, straightening his back as his face began to warm up at your words. "I do like someone. But I cannot choose them." 

For a second your heart stopped, "Oh? How come? Does she not like you as well?" You say, stopping yourself from choking on your words. 

"I do not think she acknowledges me as a potential mate." He answered quietly, looking into your eyes.  

At the start of his evolving feelings, he found it ridiculously hard to look at you without bursting out in emotions but after all these years he had gotten used to hiding it. 

“Hm.” You mumble, avoiding eye contact with him. “Maybe you should tell her. Perhaps she likes you as well.”  

Rotxo chuckled dryly before dropping his smile. His expression turns into one you have never seen before as he whispers out, "Her brother would kill me, Y/n."

"Oh." You frowned. Rotxo only glaned down, not saying a word. You felt awful. It did not matter whom he liked, he deserved to be with someone who made him happy. Even if it was not you. 

“Well, that is okay. Uhm, how well do you know her brother?” You ask genuinely, trying to figure out whom he had feelings for. You did not know any siblings that were not both mated already. 

"He is my best friend." Rotxo smiled before laughing at your facial expression. 

"I thought Ao'nung was your best friend?" You asked, his laughter drawing out a smile from your lips.  

"He is." 

"Wait. I do not understand." You said shaking your head. “You like someone who’s brother would kill you if he found out. And that person, the brother I mean, is your best friend. But if Ao’nung is your best friend, then....” 

You gasped suddenly. “Rotxo!”

“Hm?” 

"Tsireya is already dating Lo'ak!" You hiss-whispered, causing him to laugh for the second time. 

"I know, Y/n.” He smiled at your shocked expression, “I do not have feelings for Tsireya." 

"Huh?" You spoke, “Well then that makes no sense. If you do not have feelings for Tsireya then....” You stopped talking as your face heated up at the possible realization of what he was saying. 

“Wait..” You whispered shaking your head softly, “Rotxo. That can only mean-” 

"That I like you." 

At his confession you could only stare at him in silence, completely and utterly shocked. Your whole life you had felt so many feelings towards the man that sat in front of you, never daring to say a word about it and suddenly you find out that this entire time he had felt the same.

“Are you joking?” You ask softly gazing up into his eyes. Rotxo’s eyes met yours as he shook his head.  

“No, Y/n. I have liked you for years, I-I just could not bring myself to say anything. I did not think you felt the same.” He muttered, quietly. “Do you... feel the same?”  You're speechless.

"Yes," You say quickly, “I do. I-I thought it was you who did not have feelings for me. This whole time I had no idea. This whole time I liked you too.” 

"Really?" 

“I always have. Always.” You spoke tenderly. 

He smiles, a beautiful, real, smile.

“Is this why you never mated?” You whispered gently, eyes locked on his.

He felt his ears flushing at your question and they stood up straight to you for a moment before tilting backwards and lying flat against the sides of his head. 

"I spent all of my time looking at you, Y/n. I was waiting for you." he admitted, his body subconsciously leaning towards your lips.

The butterflies in your stomach intensified.

"Really?" You asked again, lips only centimeters away from yours. Rotxo inhaled softly. Ao'nung was going to kill him if he did this.  

"Y/n, Your brother." He whispered, your face inching closer to his as you shushed him softly. 

Rotxo breath was shaky against your lips as he leaned his forehead to yours. His hands trembled. So many years he had waited for this very moment. Regardless of how wrong he knew this was, how messy it was going to be, he simply could not listen.  

"Fuck." He breathed out ever so quietly. Rotxo pushed his lips against yours as you kissed him back as passionately as you could.

You could feel your guts toss and turn in the best way possible as he kissed you back. Both of your arms found their way around his strong neck, fingertips tracing over his tense skin. Rotxo finally found the courage to pull you on top of him by your waist, heart fluttering as one arm wrapped around you and the other guiding your lips to his.

The kiss itself was not perfect but it felt so unbelievably great to kiss him. As you pulled back you watched his lovely half lidded eyes being glued to your lips before he took a deep breath to engage in another kiss.

And another, and another.

There was not an inch on your face that had not gotten all showered in his love. It had taken a while until you both managed to figure out how to kiss. You could not help but whimper quietly as you felt his tongue slipping over your bottom lip before his teeth gently tugged at the soft flesh, leaving you completely breathless.   Hours passed in what felt like seconds as you two sat there until the eclipse neared, wrapped in each other's embrace, gasping for air in between lovely, innocent kisses.  

"Y/n? Y/n!?" 

Nawi's voice rang out through the village. She was looking for you. Only then did you notice that it was getting dark. 

"Oh no." You said, drawing away from Rotxo immediately, panic rushing through your veins.  

"What am I going to say?" You cursed under your breath before you got up on your feet and you peeked out of the hut. Nawi and Ao'nung were on their way, heading straight to Rotxo's Marui, guessing you would be here. 

You turned to Rotxo who now stood and was just as stressed as you were, if not even more. He cleared his throat and tried to hide his nerves. He had done so all these years, so he would do the same now, as he always had. 

"Rotxo. What are we going to do? Fuck, my brother is going to kill me." You say looking up at him, fear spread all over your face.

"Hey, we got this, okay? Just follow my lead." He ensured.

You watched as he left his Marui to face your brother and his mate. They were relieved when they saw you finally step out of his home shortly after him, trying to adapt to the calmness Rotxo showed. 

"Y/n! Where have you been? We were worried sick about you!" Nawi exclaimed, running up to you as she engulfed you into a warm hug.

"You are so irresponsible, Y/n! First you want to go hunting then you disappear out of nowhere. What is wrong with you? You should have told us where you were going!" Ao'nung started to scold you immediately, but you only pursed your lips. 

"She was with me, there is nothing to worry about." Rotxo interfered, which seemed to calm Ao'nung right away. 

"Thank Ewya. Y/n when I said go take a walk I did not mean disappear for 5 hours." Nawi says, her own scolding tactic seeping though her lips as she gave you a disciplinary look.

"I hope that is true, because if I find out you were out hunting you are going to be in so much trouble." Ao'nung spoke bitterly.

You only rolled your eyes. How ironic. As your brother continued his speech, Nawi stared at you, her eyes squinting slightly. Holding your chin in her hand, she tilted your head up slightly, examining your plump, swollen lips. You avoided all eye contact as she stared into your eyes.

Out of the corner of your eye, you noticed Rotxo watching the two of you wearily. Nawi glanced over to Rotxo's nervous expression, then back at you, then over to her husband, whom was still speaking. Her eyes widen slightly as she connected the dots. She pursed her lips, letting go of your face.

"This has been fun but we should get going. It is almost near eclipse and we all have water training with the Sully children in the morning." Nawi spoke. Relief flooded through your veins as you heard Rotxo exhale softly behind you.

"Thank you again, Rotxo." Ao'nung spoke, patting his best friend on the back before turning round to leave.

"Yes. Thank you, Rotxo." Nawi spoke, eyeing the boy carefully then hooking your arm into hers and following her mate. You allowed her to pull you away from Rotxo, beyond grateful that she did not say anything. As the three of you walked away, you glance back, Rotxo still gazing you softly. Your stomach gets warm at the sight of him, smiling back gently before turning around and walking away.

Your mind continues to race replaying Rotxo's kisses as your face flushing as you realize what had just happened.

You had finally gotten what you've always wanted. Him. Even though you were happy, you couldn’t get rid of a small thought that invaded in your mind.