jj: are you ok?
penelope: no, my man whose not really my man was almost blown up by a bomb
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jj: are you ok?
penelope: no, my man whose not really my man was almost blown up by a bomb

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emily, disgusted: you two hooked up on my office floor?!?
luke: well not directly on the floor
luke: i’m classy, i brought a blanket
penelope: luke is my enemy
luke: i am literally in love with you
jj: oh my god?! penelope’s pregnant! how did this happen?
luke: i think you know how it happened.
penelope, pointing at tara and luke respectively: emily, i’d like to see more of her and less of him.

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luke: here’s a picture of penelope yelling at me
luke: do not send help, i’m exactly where i want to be
penelope: luke and i are not dating, that was accidental intercourse!
emily: accidental? what were you trying to do?
penelope: return a book
emily: and your pants fell off?!?
luke, walking by: hey ladies!
garcia, to jj: i’m gonna lick that man from his toes to his head