#rollerboy

So, we rock up and in my head I did the same thing that happened with Laurie,

“Hey Jordaaaaaan” the stupid romantic part of me said “what if…. You get a datemate here…. In a veeeeeeeeery fanfic fluff scenario place??????? HMMMMMMMMMMMMM???????”

And I’m like “no brain very unlikely”

Which is also what I thought when I met Laurie.

So, we’re waiting outside, eager to go and skate and I start examining the potential datemate candidates.

Because I’m a lonely pan that just wants a FUCKING DATE

Plus, the last mass group meeting thing I did, I didn’t know I was pan. So that meant everyone was an option

I tap my friend who I have mentioned before as BTSfan or if you watch my YT videos you’ll soon find out her name, (I’m not saying it here because I don’t know if she’s cool with her name on tumblr, but you know who you are), and I’m like “Is that (Name of other friend who we haven’t seen in ages and TBH isn’t exactly relevant in this but it makes sense later why I’m mentioning him)” and she’s like “Holy shit, he’s way taller now” and we start talking to him and being like “hey HOLY SHIT YOU’RE TALL” and I stop looking for datemate candidates.

Thank god.

If I noticed the guy I’m about to mention now, I would have died on the spot.

So, we go in and I realise out of the friend group I’m in, four of us, I’M THE ONLY ONE THAT KNOWS HOW TO SKATE

So, I skate on roller-skates because I feel safer on them and I actually own those white 90’s looking ones

Not joking I own this exact pair, fuck rollerblades I’m out here looking old school AF

So, I don’t really know how to teach rollerblades, thankfully my friend BTSfan and her sister Prettyfriend’s mom knew how to skate rollerblades so she taught Prettyfriend and Tallfriend how to do that while I taught BTSfan

And thennnnnnnnn

Cuteboy appeared

Cuteboy (I swear to god I’m obsessed) was wearing like a sans jacket but it looked like denim

Like imagine this but denim

That’s what he was wearing

And I was like HOLY SHIT HE’S REALLY CUTE

And I tap my friend and I’m like “Not to freak you out, but there is a REALLY CUTE GUY SKATING BY US” and she looks at him and literally says “OKAY WOW”

And then he did the most amazing thing that probably isn’t that amazing to people who roller-skate a lot but to a pretty much casual skater this was amazing to me

He skated a FUCKING CROSS STEP TURN

I’M NOT FUCKING KIDDING

I WAS LOSING MY MIND

AND MY FRIEND WAS LOSING HER MIND

AND WE WERE LIKE HOLY SHIT THAT WAS AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!

So, for the whole hour we were there I stared at this boy CONSTANTLY like he would skate past and I would just stop and stare at him until BTSfan was like “Uhhhh Jordan! You’re drifting off!” I would drift away from her, I nearly crashed into a wall, I WOULD NOT STOP STARING AT THIS BOY

I started trying to build up the courage to ask for his name because either I wanted his name or for him to know his cross step looks FUCKING AWESOME

And I just couldn’t ask him, I couldn’t say anything

Then BTSfan needed a break halfway through, (Understandable we’d been skating for half an hour straight and she was a newbie), so I started skating on my own

God, I missed the feeling of just skating

When we did that session in November, I hadn’t skated since January, I hadn’t skated on a driveway, a tennis court, nothing

And it just felt really nice to skate again

Plus, I got to dance skate and dear GOD I MISSED THAT SO MUCH

Dance skating is basically me skating to the tune of the music.

On tennis courts that’s really hard to do, so being on a smooth concrete surface made me move really fast.

And then Cuteboy skated past me at one point and was like fiVE CENTIMETRES AWAY FROM MY ARM

AND THEN I REALISED HE WASN’T WEARING THE JACKET

HE WASN’T WEARING THE JACKET

HE WAS WEARING A CAMO T SHIRT

I WENT INTO FUCKING PANIC MODE

I skated over to BTSfan and just whispered “HE’S NOT WEARING THE JACKET” and she was like “I wondered when you’d notice, are you okay?”

“NO, I'M GOING TO HAVE A HEART ATTACK”

And she was like “do you want me to take a photo?” and I'm like “No, RESPECT PRIVACY” and she’s like “OKaaaaaaaaaaaay” and then I get back to dying

LAURIE WAS NOTHING LIKE THIS

AT ALL

Laurie was cute and he’s still going to have a place in my heart, but my emotions toward him more like extreme butterflies

One thing I say a lot when it comes to my crushes is that I can easily talk to them, meaning they have no clue I like them.

IF THIS BOY HASN’T NOTICED HE IS EXTREMELY BLIND I NEVER BLUSH THIS MUCH

Like I’d look at him, and just—

Everything speeds up and I struggle breathing and just

WHAT IS WITH ME

But then, unfortunately

Time ran out

And I wouldn’t see him for another month

So, I’m taking off my skates, hoping to see him and be like “Hey your cross step looked awesome” but he doesn’t show up.

Because he left the rink through the other gate not facing me to return the skates he borrowed from the rink.

I only know this because afterwards I saw him and my friends talking to him.

Well more specifically, Prettyfriend because she knows how to socialise and talk to other human beings

I know I found one of those “extroverts” I’m amazing

And then just as I’m admiring how fuCKING PRETTY THIS BOY IS

BTSfan comes running over

And I’m like “are you okay—” “I have just done God’s work”

And I’m like ????

“his name is Edward”

Not his real name but equally beautiful

I immediately hug her “I love you and you’re the greatest human being on this planet and don’t you dare think otherwise”

I mean I normally say those things to her but like this was a joyous moment

So, I go over with her to where our other friends are taking off their skates when Cuteboy has to leave

He waves at us and says bye and I inSTINCTIVELY WAVE AND SAY BYE BACK BECAUSE I’M A PERSON WHO’S ETERNALLY AFRAID OF BEING RUDE

He leaves and I just realised that’s the first time I spoke to him

And heard his voice

And I’m just going red and just processing this

“Jordan are you okay?” Prettyfriend totally knew already, “I don’t know” I reply bringing my hands in the fucking anime pose of covering blush

 LIKE EXACTLY THIS 

And so ends the november Rollerskating session

It was when I checked instagram later I realised I left a pretty gaping loophole for BTSfan

I said I didn’t want her to take photos of him for me

I forgot she thought he was cute too

So I open up the tagged photo of all the selfies and right at the end there is a small 20 second video of him skating

I LOST MY MIND

Not in anger at what she did, she had said earlier she has a bit of a stalker side

But more of

HOLY SHIT I CAN LOOK AT HIM WHENEVER I WANT

So yeah

That was the first Rollerskating session

Now you’re probably wondering “why do you wait a month to post this, you said you’d do it after a week!”

Yes I know.

But then before I knew it the december session arrived

Which as I’m writing this at 11pm it is the day of

AND I'M ACTUALLY GOING TO DIE

I JUST

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Alright a bit of backstory on this,

1)      When the video I recorded with BTSfan comes out everything we talked about at the end of the recording will have already happened

2)      BTSfan was dared by another friend to either use a pickup line on one of the guys there OR ask them to brush her hair which is how her parents met

So…

She was really nervous about it and she was like

“If I do that dare, you have to at least say hi to Edward, I don’t care if that’s all you say and then leave, just say hi to him”

And so that was what I set off to do

And holy shit did I FAIL THAT TASK

What I didn’t expect was that 1) I would really miss him after a month and 2)

I HAVE LIKE A SENSOR ON HIM

We walk in a bit late and BTSfan is like “I wonder if he’s here” and I’m like “No, he’s here.”

WE HAVEN’T EVEN PAID ENTRANCE YET, CAN BARELY SEE THE RINK AND I ALREADY DEFINITELY KNOW HE’S HERE

AND I WAS FUCKING RIGHT TOO

This also happens later when we’re playing a game the roller rink people set up and there’s like 30 people on the rink.

I get eliminated and go sit next to BTSfan who realised that rollerblading actually hurts your feet more

“Is he still in the game?” “Yeah.” “how do you know?” and then without looking told her exactly where on the rink he was standing (the game was like musical chairs) She looks behind me and I'M RIGHT

“I DIDN’T EXPECT YOU TO ACTUALLY KNOW!”

“WAIT WHAT??” I was shocked at myself tbh

But my mission was to talk to him

And goddamn it I couldn’t do it

If you guys have seen that one OZMAFIA episode on my channel where Kyrie finally confesses to us and I have to read out that line IT WAS LIKE THAT BUT IN REAL LIFE

I JUST HAD TO SAY HI ITS NOT THAT FUCKING HARD

I would get the word, make my voice get ready to say it, sense where he was, time it, see him and—

The words die in my throat

Wonderful Jordan fucking brilliant

BTW BTSfan did ask a boy to brush her hair and it WORKED???? Like, he accepted. And then it got awkward and my friend never talked to him again but hey she did it! and she’s shyer than me!

I JUST HAD TO SAY HI

NOT

THAT

FUCKING

HARD

So, it gets to a point, where I tell BTSfan “okay I don’t think I’m going to do this, physically,” and then……

At the worst

And I mean the worst possible timing ever

He destroyed any possible chance that I would be able to say hi to him

God I’m blushing thinking about it

Okay

So, he’s doing his cross-turn thing

And I of course go and look at him

And its when I realise he’s blocked by a bunch of small children

He has only one direction to go

Which is the wall

Its’ safe and he won’t run over children

What he would do is crash into ME

LIKE

I noticed this and started to move out the way, but the children blocked ME

AND SO HE CRASHED INTO ME DOING A FUCKING KABEDON

EXCEPT WAY MORE AWKWARD AND LIKE CRASHING INTO ME

SPECIFICALLY PUTTING HIS HANDS ON MY WAIST IN AN ATTEMPT TO MOVE ME (didn’t work)

HE JUST SAYS “sorry, are you okay?” AND I’M LIKE “yeah I’m fine” AND SKATES OFF NOT REALISING THE EMOTIONAL TRAIN WRECK HE JUST PUT ME THROUGH

And BTSfan is like “are you okay?” I knew she meant physically because you know someone just crashed into me

BUT AT THAT POINT I WAS JUST FREAKING OUT

I'M FREAKING OUT AGAIN JUST WRITING THIS

“Physically, yes. Mentally, no.” I actually could not breathe properly, my heart was pounding out of my chest, I was losing my MIND

The guy I HAVE A CRUSH ON

JUST GRABBED MY WAIST

I WAS NOT EMOTIONALLY OR MENTALLY OKAY WHATSOEVER

“BTSfan, I am having a heart attack and I am not going to be able to speak to him now. At all. Not happening”

And I just skated

And just

Tried to ignore EVERYTHING OR ELSE I WAS GOING TO ACTUALLY DIE

It nears the end

And the final song is playing

And I brace myself for the final song because last time it was a Bruno mars song that I really hated and I so far they were playing nearly the exact same songs

And then….

SOME

BODY

ONCE TOLD ME

And I was like “ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?”

Fun fact: the last time I heard All Star it was Laurie singing it, so yayyyyyy

And I just kept skating and honestly I hated that song before Laurie, it was good for memes but repeatedly and as a song I hated it

But after Laurie I did genuinely start to enjoy the song so I’m singing and skating to this song and I notice Edward dance skating to the song and just

He’s adorable and I really like this boy

So, by this point I’ve accepted the fact I won’t be able to speak to him and thank every god under the sun that the flashing rainbow lights were still on when he crashed into me

I’m skating, I’m singing, I’m trying to ignore the memory in my head—

“Jordan!”

And instantly I turn my head around and

It’s Edward

Its FUCKING EDWARD

“How are you?”

“I’m doing good, how have you been?” “Doing good, only fallen over once so that’s pretty good!” then he waves at me “See you later!” and skates off

I find myself the nearest wall and just process what the EVER-LOVING FUCK JUST HAPPENED

HE SPOKE TO ME

HE KNOWS MY NAME

HIS VOICE IS WAY HOTTER THAN I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE

HE

KNOWS

MY

NAME

AND THEN PRETTY FRIEND COMES OVER AND SHE’S LIKE “How’d go~?” and I’m like “If I die, you know the cause, HOLY SHIT HE KNOWS MY NAME”

So, I just hit blushy mess mode and just

I don’t even remember the rest of what happened

Afterwards I’m putting on my shoes

By myself

Because I’m the only one that actually owns skates and doesn’t have to return them

And then because I’m still sneaking glances at him, he makes eye contact and waves

And just

I wave back because I’m a polite person

And I hope and pray he mistakes the blush for overheating

Just

And then my brother who already knew and came about fifteen minutes earlier comes up to me and is like “I saw you talk to him” “Byakuya I’m going to flip a table help me” To explain his name by the way he’s a reincarnated 9year old Byakuya Togami

In other words, an emotionless bitch.

He has never cried at a movie. We’ve watched Lion King with him

THE FUCKER DIDN’T CRY AT MUFASA’S DEATH HE IS AN EMOTIONLESS HUSK

About an hour after all the roller-skating happened Byakuya told me that Prettyfriend had asked him to talk to me

Which is fine

It’s just that if I die we all know who the murderer behind the scenes is

I did say “thank you for doing that and also thank you for giving me a heart attack”

So then after all that

I’m here

At 12am

Writing this

Because otherwise I will implode from all the emotions

If ya’ll read this whole thing then holy shit you are a legend and I love you you’re amazing thank you for caring enough about my rambles that you read through almost 3000 words when that could be spent on fanfiction

Thank you

Will there be an update next month? Most likely

I will probably be dying then as well

Anyways

I guess this goes under Edward Stories now huh

Or RollerBoy

Eh I’ll do both

Alrighty then I’m going to try and sleep now so yeah

Oooh wait Imma tag @cubedtriangle​ in this, girl this is a ride and half, like I thought Laurie was a ride but damn if this ain’t a fucking death roller coaster then I don’t know what it is

Okay then everything seems to be in order

Have a good night or morning wherever you are!

Maze Girl out