Here are some guidelines for those who find that their chores include accepting an Academy Award:
1. Look pleased and grateful, but not hysterically so. The person who bursts into tears and sobs that this is the greatest moment of his or her entire life is overdoing it.
2. Thank two or three key individuals and perhaps a supportive group, but not your parents, grade school teachers, and everyone else who has ever touched your life. That suggests that you are crediting those people with having created something magnificent (you).
3. Understand that you are being honored for one ability and not for being a general national treasure, and therefore keep any utterings of wisdom to your profession, instead of sharing your politics or philosophy of life.
If you can't manage all of this, you might want to consider losing, instead.
**The Fuzzy Blue Alien who runs the blog will respectfully point out that if your name happens to be Meryl Streep and you are a class act who can manage to be eloquent and witty under severe pressure and emotional upheaval, then you should be exempted from the last rule. XD