#robconquest

Yeah, you had a clue that maybe you should be concerned when you spotted Invincible shifting rubble. But it’s been a few weeks since the Invincible War, and he’s been to plenty of cities, not just this one. Tends to flit between the worst effected.

So it was no major warning sign, just a catch at your attention as you worked with the small crew you’d been assigned to. With the world how it is, any work you can get was gratefully taken. And not many have the stomach for uncovering and clearing bodies, despite how good the pay is. Means you also get a roof over your head, instead of the refugee shelter, and-

Should’ve stayed in the damn shelter, huh.

Okay. Chances of dying? Sky high. Could run, but they’ll be levelling the city soon. Big ka-boom.

You don’t have powers, because fuck you that’s why, and there’s no handy dandy helicopter to hop a ride on. You also can’t pilot a helicopter, but that’s besides the point.

Invincible is straightening up, and you vaguely hear Conquest’s dissatisfaction with the lack of, y’know, his namesake. A few of the workers are backing off as they realise something’s up, and one lady tugs at your arm. They don’t know there’s no point in moving. They don’t know you’re all about to die.

Shit.

Alright, then. Hail Mary, full of fucking grace.

“I am Conquest, and I am your last chance of-”

“Did you say your name is Conquest?” you call out, jogging over. “The Conquest?”

Wow, dude is huge. Not helped by the hover he’s rocking, but that is one big beefy guy.

The gauntlet is a duller kind of metal than you thought it’d be, looks solid enough to casually shatter a building just by being dropped on it. The eye that turns to you is - and you hate to be cliche, but c’mon - screaming hardened killer, your sole hope in the faintest hint of bemusement in his expression.

“You’ve heard of me?”

“Of course I have.” You slow and hold a hand over heart to express utmost sincerity. Which you’re capable of. On a good day, probably. “Big fan. Biggest fan, in fact. I wish I could say I’ve followed your career since day one, but I wasn’t so lucky to be born at the start of your meteoric rise-”

“Are you-” Invincible cuts himself off, shifting so he’s partially in front of you and keeping a wary eye on Conquest. “You need to get out of here. You’re in danger.”

You glare at him. “I know, dude.” Yanking a smile back on, you look up at Conquest again. “It’s an honour to have our planet visited by such a legend. I assume you’re here for the takeover? This guy, uh-”

You step forward and pat Invincible’s back. Hard. For a human; this fucker can probably barely feel it. “As you can see, he’s been hard at work. Look how destroyed this city is! So many dead bodies. Ask anyone, and they’ll confirm Invincible is responsible. But it’s a work in progress. It’s his first time - he isn’t experienced like you, y’know? So, could we get an extension?”

Conquest is looking at you like you’re a very odd insect he’s never encountered before. Not great for gauging success, but you have absolutely nothing to lose at this stage.

“I’d also love to pick your brains, if you have a minute,” you add with- okay, maybe a bit more genuine curiosity, come the fuck on. “I know you must be a busy guy, high demand and all, but I have so many questions.”

“Such as?”

Wait, he’s humouring you? Oh. Cool. You drop your hand from Invincible’s tense back and step past him, wishing you had a notepad.

“Okay, what’s the coolest thing you’ve ever fought? And I don’t just mean the toughest battle. What actually shocked you, across all those planets? And who made your gauntlet? What’s it made of? Do you ever get that phantom limb sense, or are you used to it by now? What was it like growing up on Viltrum? Did you have siblings-”

“Enough,” he says, but he doesn’t look pissed as he lowers down until his feet are on the ground. Gooood sign? Like, he’s totally looming over you, but you yet live. Huzzah. “You’re human?”

“As far as I know.”

He hums, then looks over the top of your head at Invincible. You idly hope you’re not about to have something in common with another Robin in a superhero universe. The temptation to go directly for a good fight is pretty fucking obvious.

Ah, fuck it. Go big or go home.

“I’ve heard a lot about you, but no one ever mentioned how lovely your voice is,” you say, and his attention snaps back to you so fast it’s kind of hilarious. “Or how handsome you are. That scar really distinguishes you, I’ve gotta say, and that eye colour…I’ve never seen anything like it.”

Seriously, though. It’s a cool colour. Legit looks gold, and especially noticeably with the wide, startled look.

“What…What are you attempting to-”

You wince. “Was that too forward? Sorry, sorry. I’m a little overwhelmed, is all. Getting to meet the Conquest is very exciting. You must get this constantly, after all the amazing work you’ve done for the Empire. I’ll stop.”

“No.” He pauses, as if he didn’t fully mean to say that. But then he continues, “If there’s…no need for a correction here, I have the time to speak with you.”

…That worked?

Holy shit, that worked.

Wait. He’ll actually answer your questions? Awesome.

“Then I’ll make the most of it. How long do you have? Because I have a lot of questions, and I’m pretty sure I’ll come up with more- Hey, do you mind if we go somewhere we can sit down? I’m not a badass warrior like you; being on my feet all day is killer-”

-

“…What the fuck just happened?”

We've had wife guy Sinister, we absolutely deserve wife guy Conquest. I generally see him doing this weird combo of folding hard in the face of interest/flirtation/lack of fear, but also retaining the fact he's. Y'know, Conquest.

Luckily Robin's both invested in the tragedy of violence and attracted to it, so you get the balancing act of "here's another way to live, and wow isn't hero work a great way to channel violent impulses and feed into the need to be of use/have purpose? And- uh, okay, I guess you can...also find purpose in being Best Boy. That's a choice you can make. No objections on this front, chief." thumbs up.

Robin you strange person.

"Do you not fear my strength? I could kill you before you even realised what was happening."

"Hot. Haha, sorry, I'll take this seriously - I'm pretty confident you won't hurt me, so I'm not worried about that. And you might've noticed my fear response is..."

"Non-existent?"

"Hey, it's there. Just not very active. We've used up our quota for the year, try again later."

Oh no Robin in space. Conquest "this is my wife, I refuse to leave her" and Mark shrugging when Nolan looks to him for some form of explanation because hey, he doesn't know wtf is up either.

Conquest "I wear bright tropical shirts to symbollise my loyalty" and stickers all over his gauntlet. And at least one Robin signature. A very sturdy friendship bracelet.

Robins are fully capable of attachment to other people and can somewhat stabilise through that, depending on circumstances, but she'll usually have at least some draw to Mark (just not necessarily romantic interest). Also, it's funny.

For that snippet AU, some shade of poly is also the funniest option, so you can guess where I'd likely veer xD Conquest over the course of one (1) chat going from ready to destroy Earth, to 'I believe I understand your affinity for these creatures' while heart eyes at Robin.

First time in his life that someone has expressed interest in him, combo'd with awe over his accomplishments but also- his thoughts and opinions? And then also keeps complimenting him? Appearance included?

"So uh, okay, maybe I lied about Invincible taking over Earth. But I did really want to chat with you. Would you...be open to sticking around on Earth?" oh shit there's no way he'll go for this. goodbye cruel world-

"I will consider it." Ten more minutes of conversation pass, and it's turned into Conquest therapy hour with Robin both fascinated and sympathetic, and it's decided, he's staying.

"You deserve to be loved and appreciated for who you are. Say it with me, dude."

"I...deserve to be loved and appreciated for who I am."

"Good boy."

????...❤️

I have no idea how RobMark would happen in this crazy timeline. Maybe he takes it on himself to keep a close watch on Conquest, which means Robin-exposure, and we know how that tends to go.

And where Robin goes obviously Conquest goes - he's having to reckon in real time with the fact that she is small, delicate, and human, and could be taken out by a "particularly determined goose"

"That- that was a joke, sweetheart, I won't actually die via goose. Unless it's a mutated or possessed one - have those happened yet?" pulls out phone while Conquest frets

Conquest "this bond is a weakness...it's weakening me....I should-" Robin takes his hand while still more focused on her phone, to keep him walking alongside her "....I'll just compensate for her inability to fight, with my superior strength."

(If they make it to RobMark con through the poly loophole, Viltrumite Mark from MB will be nodding along to that thought process)

Superhero route jeeez Robin and the struggle not to suggest Thanos as a hero name. Robin passively mass manipulating public opinion 'for the fun of it' (and also sure, motivated to reduce conflict at the same time by working on his PR, but the real motive is always 'does this spark joy').

custom matching tropical shirts omg that's how you really know they love her.

William "You look like you're all on the same lame bowling team" and immediately invites them out to bowling, because duh. He's gotta see how this goes.

Poly route = a Robin blessed to actually get to be bisexual (instead of just having constant tension with Eve I can't help writing I have no control-).

Huh wait. The plot. Ohhhh.

It’s an impulse, the way a lot of things are for you lately. One crops up? Gotta seize the day, because fuck knows how long the thread of want will last.

It’s your turn, and you did good today. Often takes a couple days after a break to really get into the swing of sparring with Conquest; adjusting to whatever threats you’ve been dealing with recently is a real problem.

Can’t be too soft, not with the Empire’s expectations - but also, stay controlled and don’t obliterate anyone you shouldn’t. And try to find the fun in it, because otherwise, what’s the point?

So you’ve got a few picks for a blood source. The gash in the side of his neck, where you sank your fingers in when he got a hold on you. Various scrapes and slices on his arms and chest, because even if you both usually keep to blunt force, it adds up when you’re blasting apart the landscape.

The spot that catches your attention is the bleeding gap where you knocked a tooth out. You’re very proud of that one, even if it broke your knuckles in the process. Ah, no one appreciates how hard it is to be such a physically weak Viltrumite - you’d totally be easy pickings if you weren’t considered valuable enough to keep alive.

This might test that a bit, but hey. Whims are made to be indulged.

Conquest hasn’t noticed your careful, rational consideration. He’s often less, hmm, overly aware? Yeah. The spars seem to chill him out the most after the first day, massive shoulders loose and no impatient rush for you to finish the freaky little ritual.

You floating closer makes no difference there, other than a mildly expectant tilt of his head as you rise to his eye level.

“Hold still, fruitcake.” Let’s see if he returns to kicking your ass for this - you’re one big aching mess now, but only one of your arms is broken. The other’s more than capable of cupping his cheek as you lean in to kiss him.

Interesting. That’s the word to describe the experience. His lips are rough, like most of his skin you’d wager, but the blood makes them slick and warm as you trace the shape with your tongue. Taste him, and that’s the real hit - visceral familiarity you’d almost believe is tender, if such a thing was possible to Viltrumites.

His surprise isn’t a sound. It’s the change in pressure in the dense air around you, the subtle tension in his cheek. The satisfied grin faltered when you leaned in, even if his lips remained parted.

But he doesn’t move. He lets you lick into the wet wound of the tooth you knocked free, and already a new one is beginning to push through his gums.

You pull back and smile at his narrowed eyes, the low set of his eyebrows. It’d read as angry, if you didn’t know him so oddly well.

“What was the purpose of that?” he asks, and you think most would miss the genuine confusion, the hint of curiosity.

He indulges your eccentricities more than Kregg does. It isn’t like he knows what a kiss even is, given it’s a relatively rare thing across planets. Though he might pick up the crossover of implications with some species, due to your tongue being involved.

Then again, you’ve been exchanging blood for years now. Who fucking knows what baselines he has in mind.