#ritter rambles

Im damn near entirely burned out on hetalia. The community causes me a lot of stress and anxiety, but leaving it would mean starting all over from scratch at 0 with a different blog, which idk if i could do that. I also do this for free, and use my own free time in order to do it. Its a lot of work, and i dont feel appreciated doing it for one, and I dont feel as if it...BENEFITS me. I dont GET coffees or commissions. I dont get many compliments. I dont...have fun hardly any more drawing. Plus, ive never been the best at drawing people. I have little faith in my abilities to get better at it, and i never learned anatomy except for what ive picked up from shitty How 2 Draw Animu books as a middle schooler. I want to get better, but i lack the desire for something that stresses me out. And im really sorry if my art reflects that. I never draw side angles for a reason. And I feel constantly like my art is in that weird point of "This is adequate and they can make certain things really well, so ill just hop along for the ride."

My story in this is...not the best. And relatively pointless. The whole story regarding the curse is probably only about the 4th most like, interesting thing about it. Its not too interesting and its probably been done to hell. Plus I worry a lot. I worry that people will begin to use it as a way to brush off how mean and awful Beel is. How cold, cruel and heartless she can be. Im afraid that it will be used in an apologist way, or a way to excuse how truely vile she is. Yes, what happened to her is tragic, but she literally did all this to herself and allowed this to happen, not to mention she CHOSE her own behavior.

I dont want Beel to be another Snape, another Kylo, another Villain excused of their actions because they Hurt on the inside. I want her to be hated, but loved because shes so awful and horrible. And it worries me because ive given her 0 positive attributes other than Pretty and Smart.

Ill be back one day, I guess. Im worried my depression is getting my feelings all fucked. I want to love this blog again and want to have fun drawing again. I want to like my own creations again. And this sadly applies to Olivia as well.

1: How The Grinch Stole Christmas (Both)

2: The Polar Express

3: The Santa Clause

4: The Muppet Christmas Carol

5: Elf

OOF sorry friend i might not be the best person to ask. I tend to just gather an amassed learning and run wild with what ive got. Ill give you a short rundown of what my understanding is for the broad gist of things and maybe a peice or two from me from how i see and write the characters.

UNDERFELL: a darker, more serious and "edgier" au, where monsters fight each other and are violent threats. Papyrus is sharper and meaner, prideful, but is more of a grump than anything. He wears black and has a red cape, i believe? And has a disdain for humans and is obsessed with lasagna but cant cook, as it seems he often adds vinegar and glass. Sans is more wary and a bit raunchier with the jokes, and can seem more hotheaded. He comes across as a big bully but both seem to have a heart of gold. Nicknames for Pap tend to be Boss, Edge, Fell. For Sans, I normally see Red, but occassionally see Cherry and Chomper or even Rust.

Mine: Noir is the name i gave paps, and i see him more as a very prideful and cunning bastard, whos a tsundere and secretly wants to just....help. He also is an excellent chef. Rome however cant cook to save his life and is a serial flirt, having issues with commitment. He plays up being dumber and weaker than he really is, and is super proud of his bro.

UNDERSWAP/SWAPTALE: This one is a bit of a topsy turvy mess. Everyone is....swapped? But not really? Its really weird. The king is the one in the ruins, the queen is the one killing humans, alphys is buff and undyne is a nerd, ect. Where it gets MORE confusing is the skelebros tbh.

The excitable, energetic one is always sans, and the lazy one is always papyrus. Seems cut and dry right? NO. SOMETIMES SANS IS THE OLDER BROTHER, SOMETIMES ITS PAPS. SOMETIMES SANS IS STILL THE JUDGE, SOMETIMES ITS PAPS. SOMETIMES SANS IS STILL A SCIENCE FAN, SOMETIMES ITS PAPS. SOMETIMES SANS HATES PUNS, SOMETIMES PAPS. GOOD. LUCK.

The common conception, regardless though, is that Blue or Blueberry is incredibly childish and immature and Stretch or Pappy is incredibly aloof and overprotective of Sans.

Mine: Zephyr (once u get farther along in my story) has a bit of a boyish charm who CANNOT stand being treated as a baby. He is a bit rowdy and very energetic, and LOVES a challenge. Hes very technical and likes taking stuff apart and putting them back together. Cass is his lazy older brother who is a romantic, but also has severe trust issues. He will defend his brother egardless of if hes in the wrong or not and that honestly gets him in more trouble than not.

SWAPFELL/FELLSWAP: lmao good luck. Theres so many different versions of this au. Its a swaped version of the fell universe, i suppose. So edgy swap. Black/Razz is bossy and bratty and a lot of times abusive and Rus/Mutt is honestly a mix bag depending on what one u go with. He can be a douchey thug who does what he wants, an anxious mess, a money hungry asshole or a horndog.

Mine: Corvid seems bratty and bossy, but its mainly due to their high amounts of insecurity and fear of failure. They tend to push people away, but crave attention and affection. Dante is the name i gave papyrus. And i guess hes the anxious mess version. Hes an empanth to the highest degree and is afraid of a lot if things, though when he finally gets Serious, he wont stop attacking until you stop moving.

Horrortale: A spooky, very dark version of undertale where after the human leaves with the souls and kills asgore, undyne takes the throne and magic reserves begin running low causing a widespread famine. Sans (Axe, Blood, Blade) is a lot more...sadistic and cunning, and papyrus (Crooks, Maws, Sugar) seems to play sweet but can be sarcastic and very, very twisted. The original creator i believe is sourapplestudios.

Mine: Butch, aka sans, is Slow, but ingredibly tough and strong. The injury to his head made his thinking a tad delayed, but hes sharp and picks up on stuff you wouldnt notice. Papyrus aka Hickory is agile and lithe, and an fast, fast monster. His puzzles border on the dangerous side and he has learned to never question a meal. He is exceptional with kids and has vision issues. However, hes very patient and generous.