#rip nan

I was stuck on the M25 wondering if my nan was going to die.

Going back and forth like we are passing trains in the night.

You say good morning I say good night.

Trauma is a collective therapy.

If you are upset by the following please leave.

My grandad says he wants to die, have you got any new tricks?

Ringing up everyone trying to play the entitlement card.

It's a privilege for my presence it's not a requirement.

Why do you think your entilted to a opinion when you haven't a clue about the economy or welfare?

How is that nan calls for reform, is that why a 1/2 of the country are in unrest, unfulfilled and overworked.

Should young people be deployed, you somehow think I'm lazy, when my brain is crazy, I'm clumsy when I'm tired, anger when I'm depressed.

Idk if will all turn to dust, please don't bury us, you think that your the host of our bodies, just as sexism made women follow blindy on sedation.

Shatter me pour me a pineapple crush if time is ticking like sand washing away our sight.

Have I found a ninth mental that I can tick or bore you to death with my expertise?

I'm sitting here why do the people I love burn, like hidden bodies I'm just discovered, reading their wishes as if they were my own?

You love me don't you, running round in circles, who am I, do you remember me as I caress your face.

The selection I can't deal with deception, decit with you lies, I will remember you as when you first loved me, what we shared, our history of privilege, royalty our shared devotion.

Illuminae your radiance or excellence you light up the night when it's quiet, insomnia wakes me, what would daphne do? What would hillary say? How can you show up I'll ask Sophia, if I want a country song to sing along I'll ask bethany.

I'm a girl who takes eye for eye so I'll put posion in your lungs, I'm a pest, I'm trouble, you take pity on my kindness like its a token of charity. To you I hope you get clarity I would ask for payment, if I'm your form of a pet that needs to be tamed, exchange me for something easier to control.

If melancholia is lurking around like the force of dark matter, trying to say my nan your alive, get dressed, have some substance, go out and live your life.

She's possessed the illness has come back just as a self critical narcissistic are like weeds, just as you sign of the deeds, they collect everything that you own, not that you could moan.

I’m putting this under a read more as it may be upsetting for some, especially for those who have lost a loved one in a similar way. 

R.I.P Nan (Elizabeth Todd 1930-2017)

Yesterday, God called you home, and though I was only a little girl the last time I saw you, I remember your strong personality, your yorkshire puddings and your gentle, and firm nature that taught me how to be kind and confident (and how to love broccoli LOL!). You participated in WW2 at 15, got struck by lightning twice in your life, raised my Dad and his brother as a single mother, and lived alone for fifty years, you had a tough life but in the long years since I’ve met you, you were never bitter, you were humble, sweet, kind and had a strange sense a humour and you had a natural knack for child-care. Nan, you were and are an inspiration, and for that one month my brother and I met you all those eighteen years ago at ages 6 and 5, you left us with very fond memories that will stay with us till the end of our days! You leave behind 4 grandchildren and 1 great-grandchild and 2 sons.