#rftv

         What better distraction than focusing on non-mission bonding time with his godson?

         “You want to learn how to cook?” Harry questions.  “Why?”

         “Well, A) because I should be taking care of you rather than the other way around…”

         “You are!” Harry insists.  “You’ve been great with everything so far – particularly the fact that you got me away from the Dursleys – you gave me a home, you don’t need to do anything else.”

         Sirius laughs, “Fair, but my second thing was that I wanted to bond with you regarding something other than the mission.”

         “We’ve been bonding with other stuff – going on rides, going out with our new identities, and telling me stories about mum and dad… you’ve been doing great.”

         Harry’s praise has Sirius feeling like a good dog that made his owner happy, and he almost blushes, but instead just smiles.  “Okay, kid, you win.  I just thought it could be something else…”

         Harry pauses his game to turn to him, “I’d be delighted to teach you, I just like the idea of you keeping me around ‘cause I feed you.”

         Sirius laughs because he’s half-sure Harry is joking, “You don’t have to feed me for me to want you around kid.”  He ruffles Harry’s hair.  “Besides, we do have Missy, who’s been taking care of things.”

         “So, you tell me every day,” Harry blushes.  “I was only half-joking.  I know that you don’t need that.  I’m just… I kind of like the idea of … this being something I do for you...” he trails off and mutters something about ‘earning his keep’ which causes Sirius to frown.

         “What was that last bit, Harry?”

         “It’s not important,” Harry states.  Then because he clearly wants to avoid whatever he said, he adds, “You know, I learned that you liked crosswords from spying on the Minister when I snuck into Hogsmeade and almost got caught.  He mentioned it and the fact that you’re my godfather.”

         Sirius grimaces, he hadn’t realized that was how Harry had heard, he had hoped it had been Petunia or Remus.  “Oh kid, that’s how you found out?  At the same time that you also discovered what the world thought I did?”

         Harry nods, “I was pretty angry at you – it hurt to think that they were betrayed by their best friend and the day after Ron and Hermione had to talk me out of going after you.”  He pauses, looking down, “I wanted you dead – I am still surprised that I couldn’t do it after the things first and second year and then… I talked you into not killing Pettigrew and now…”

         “Hey, kid, it’s not your fault,” Sirius states, stopping him from thinking that he was responsible for the war just because he had stopped Sirius and Remus from killing Pettigrew.  “You did the right thing – if we had killed him, then we wouldn’t be here right now because I would’ve gone back to prison and that would’ve sucked for all of us.”

         “Yeah, true, but he –”

         “Is at fault for his own actions.  He chose to go after Voldemort and that’s his own damn fault.  It’s not yours.  You are not responsible for other people’s actions,” Sirius states.  “Otherwise, it’s really my fault – I could have gotten him from Ron sooner or Remus could have remembered his potion or something – it’s not on you, you made the right decision.”

         Harry shrugs, “I guess.”

         Sirius nods, slightly before giving him a look when he realizes that he had gotten distracted from Harry’s muttered words.  “So, kid, back to what you mumbled before…”

         “It’s not important – have you always loved the crossword or were you just bored because you’d gotten enough of your magic back?”

         “Kid,” Sirius states, giving him a look.  “I want to know what you said and then I’ll answer your question.”

         Harry sighs, clearly annoyed.  “Fine. I said that I wanted to earn my keep.”

         “What would make you think –” he stops, realizing that Harry likely cooks because it was one of his chores.  “That bitch. Harry, listen to me, you do not have to do any chores to ‘earn your keep’.  I take care of you – you don’t have to do anything that you don’t want to do – I don’t need you to ‘earn your keep’ any good guardian would never make you feel that way.”

         Harry looks up at him, surprised.  “So, you – you don’t want me to – to cook or clean and stuff?”

         “Only if you like to cook, but if you don’t then – that’s just fine. We’ve got Missy and we don’t need you to cook.  I thought you liked it – if that’s not the case…”

         “No, I do,” Harry assures him.  “I just also figured that I could earn my keep, too.  Make sure that I was worth it to you.”

         Sirius’ heart breaks at those words.  His godson should absolutely not feel like he has to earn his keep or make sure he’s worth it to Sirius because he was just for being Harry.  “Aw, kid, I’m so sorry that you felt like you had do earn it or something because you are worth it.  Just for being Harry, my godson.  You don’t – you never should’ve had to feel that way.”

         Harry frowns, “But you – you wouldn’t let me pay for anything and you bought me all these things…”

         “Things that you should’ve had from the get-go and things that you deserve. Things that I should’ve provided for you a long time ago.  You deserve so much better than this, Harry.”  

         Sirius is upset by the revelations, determined more than ever to make sure that Harry feels love and gets to have the best summer of his life.  

         Harry nods, uncertainly.  “Thank you, Sirius.  You – you have done so much for me, and I appreciate it.”

         “And you deserve it, you know that right?”

         “I do now,” Harry assures him.  “And you know if you’re … if you wanted to learn how to cook so that we’re doing something together instead – I do think it’d be cool to show you.”

         “Yeah?” Sirius questions, liking the idea.  “Because I think we could make it fun – even make a huge mess that Missy will enjoy cleaning up.”

         Harry grins, “It’ll be nice to have that rather than being the one that has to do the cleaning up.”

         “Good. Then let’s do it.”

***

         The kitchen was a mess.  They’re both laughing their arses off about the fact that they are both covered in flower and somehow managed to get it everywhere.  

         “Is this really how you make biscuits?” Sirius teases.  

         “It’s not my fault,” Harry jokes, flicking some flower at him.  “You’re the one that took the mixing bowl from me trying to show off your lame mixing skills.”

         “They’re not lame!” Sirius insists, laughing.  “How hard is it to mix ingredients together?”

         “Judging by the state of the kitchen – very hard.”

         “Cute, kid,” Sirius states, still smiling.  “Maybe we should try something simpler.”

         “I picked something that I thought was easy to teach you – you didn’t you say that you used to watch dad cook?” Harry questions.

         “I did,” Sirius states.  “It’s just – I didn’t memorize how he did it… besides you’re the teacher here.”

         Harry laughs, “Are you saying that I’m a bad teacher because I’ve got some references that say otherwise.”

         Sirius laughs, “I suppose you do… maybe you’re better at teaching DADA than teaching me to cook.”

         “Maybe I had better students,” Harry teases, flicking more flower at him. “But seriously, we can try again? Maybe try cooking dinner instead?”

         Sirius grins, “Sounds brilliant.  Let’s get Missy to clean this up first.”

         Missy appears and it’s clean within moments.  

         Harry laughs, “Wow, I love magic.”

         “Me too,” Sirius states.  “I have certainly taken it for granted, but I love it.  Makes life easier.”

         “Definitely.”

         Once they’re both back on their feet, Harry says, “Let’s cook something simple – pasta with meat sauce and garlic bread.  Since I like homemade sauce, we can make a whole pot of it and then whatever we don’t eat we can save for later.”

         Sirius grins, “Sounds good, Chef.”

         Harry laughs, “I’m not a chef, I just … happened to enjoy cooking.”

         “I’m glad you managed to like something that you had to do.”

         “Me too,” Harry states, before pulling him to beside the stove. “So, cooking a new sauce from scratch is going to take some time.  We start breaking up the ground beef into this large saucepan with the onion, garlic and green pepper until it’s all cooked.  It’s only going to take a few minutes.”

         “And then what?”

         “Well, then we’ll put it in a nice pot with tomato sauce and a few other flavors and simmer it for a while, cooking it nice and slow.”

         “Alright then,” Sirius shrugs.

         Harry smiles, “And once we feel like we’re close to having it ready, we’ll boil some water for the pasta and cook it.  It’s the easy bit and we’ll turn on the toaster oven for garlic bread.  We can spend some time mixing the ingredients for the garlic part of the bread in the meantime.”

         “Okay, sounds good.”

         A little while later, the sauce is starting to finish, so Harry puts on the pot of water and turns on the toaster oven.  He helps Sirius coat their garlic bread before offering him a taste of the sauce.

         “What do you think?”

         Sirius smiles, “I think you’re a good cook.  How do you know it from memory?”

         Harry smiles, “I didn’t really get to keep many things that I liked – they weren’t big on me being happy.  So, I had to think about it and sort of get the idea of it without help.”

         “Well, you did a great job,” Sirius praises.  “Because this is really good.”

         Harry preens under the praise reminding Sirius that Harry hasn’t gotten a lot of praise growing up and that he should do it more often.  “Thanks, Sirius.”

         It’s quite for a bit before Sirius says, “Oh, look, the pot’s boiling.”

         “Right, so we take a fistful of the pasta and break it in half like this and put it in the pot,” Harry says as he breaks the pasta and puts it in the pot.

         Sirius smiles as he, too, grabs a fistful and does the same.  Then he watches as Harry puts the garlic bread into the toaster oven.  “The pasta usually takes twenty minutes so we’ll have some time before it’ll be done – we just have to watch it, stirring it and such.”

         “And what would you like to do while we’re waiting?” Sirius questions.

         “You could tell me more about your crossword habit?” Harry probes, clearly caring enough to get to know Sirius more than as his protector, which makes Sirius smile.

         “Well, I – I was always curious and sort-of needed distractions sometimes, and I stumbled across the crossword.  Suddenly, it kept my attention for a while and helped me a lot. It’s like it gives me a focus away from my other thoughts sometimes.  You know – like needing to forget about my mother’s howler or my brother’s distance at school.”

         “Oh, that makes sense – I used my broomstick servicing kit that Hermione bought me for my thirteenth birthday to distract me from Marge’s tirades about me or my parents when she visited… it didn’t work the last night though.”

         “That’s the night I saw you?” Sirius questions.

         Harry nods, refocusing on the sauce.  “It was – I had enough.  I accidentally blew her up.  I thought I was a fugitive because Dobby had gotten me into trouble the year before… it was a mess, but it worked out.”

         “Hmm-mm,” Sirius hums.  He can tell that Harry doesn’t want to go into the details and he won’t force it.  “Well, yeah, like that.”

         “So, then, we should get you some more crosswords – muggles have entire books of them, so you don’t have to get them just from the paper,” Harry offers.

         “But wouldn’t they include muggle things – things that I wouldn’t know.”  Harry frowns, looking upset that Sirius didn’t like his idea, so he adds, “But you know, it would be great to learn.  We could do them together?”

         His offer is rewarded with a grin, “Don’t worry, you’ll know lots of muggle things by the end of the summer!”

         Sirius grins, “Good, I look forward to it.”

         “Dinner’s done,” Harry states after a minute.  “Time to eat the delicious meal we cooked.”

         “Good. Thank you for teaching me, kid.”

         Harry laughs, pushing him off, “It’s too early for cake!”

         “It’s never too early for cake,” Sirius jokes.  “Just kidding, but I do have breakfast in the kitchen.”

         “You come to someone else’s house, and made breakfast?” Harry asks, uncertain.

         “Andy told me I could because, and I quote, ‘I’ve never seen you cook anything, and I’m curious.’”

         “Curious about what?” Harry asks.  “Your food isn’t going to poison me, is it?”

         “Of course not,” Sirius states.  “And apparently, she didn’t think I knew how and wanted to watch.  Now, come on!”

         Sirius doesn’t bother to let him get dressed, pulling him down the hall, where a clearly exhausted Remus is sitting with Ted, Andy, Tonks, and surprisingly, Ron and Hermione.

         “Happy birthday, Harry!” Hermione yells, jumping up and giving him a hug. He also gets hugs from everyone else in the room.  While they say, ‘Happy Birthday.’

         “Thanks, everyone,” Harry replies.  He sits down next to Sirius.  

         “Sorry it’s so early, but Ted and I have to go to work, and Sirius was bursting with excitement since he flooed in this morning…”

         “It’s the first birthday since he was born that I actually get to be a part of, naturally, I was bursting with excitement,” Sirius states, and Harry smiles. It was the first birthday that he found himself with people that actually wanted to celebrate with him.  He’d be fine with just an acknowledgement of the day by Sirius, he certainly didn’t need the over-excitement, but he did appreciate it.  

         “I appreciate it, Sirius.  Really, thank you all,” he says as they dig into breakfast, and chat about various things. The Daily Prophet arrives half-way through, but they try to avoid looking at it, not wanting to bring everyone down with mentions of dementor attacks or missing people.

         Shortly after Ted and Andy leave, content with the promise that Harry and Sirius stay until dinner so that they can have cake with them to celebrate Harry’s birthday. Remus goes to the guest room to sleep, leaving Tonks, Sirius, Harry, Ron and Hermione to play games in the living room. It hadn’t exactly been what he wanted (he wanted to go to the amusement park, but they couldn’t go without their other identities and Harry did not want to share with anyone that would tell Dumbledore, which obviously included Ron and Hermione).  Still, he was relatively happy with the low-key party.  

         Ron and Hermione, although mostly Hermione, had many questions about how he’d ended up at the Tonks’ for his birthday.  Apparently, no one had told them that he’d been at their private cottage for the entire summer so far, which made sense, since it was a secret. He gave them the answer that he, Remus, and Sirius had come up with, basically that during Tonks and Remus’ guard duty, Andy made a visit and offered them to come to her house.  Given Andy’s connection to Sirius, and the fact that her daughter was in the Order, it made sense.  At no point did he tell her that he’d never been to the Dursley’s this year because he knew she’d be upset about it, considering her questions that sounded like she was upset that he wasn’t at the Weasley’s…and dead set against going there this summer for more than a visit.

         Since he hadn’t spent as much time with Ron and Hermione since Sirius had returned from the veil, Sirius encourages him to play some games with them as he talks and spends a bit of time with Tonks.  Thrilled with his encouragement, he’s surprised when after only a few minutes of their time alone before Ron continues what he started at Hogwarts.

         “Are you sure that you shouldn’t be hanging out at the Burrow?  We’d be happy to have you.  We’ve been disappointed when you didn’t come a couple of weeks ago,” Ron offers.

         Harry shrugs, “Sirius and I have been doing great on our own, bonding and all that, and it’s been great.”

         “Yeah, but do you really want to spend so much time with a mental case?” Ron asks.

         Harry frowns, “Sirius has been a lot better, the veil really helped, and frankly, you didn’t really care while we were with the Dursleys.”

         “Yeah, well, there were others around to help, right?”

         “I think what Ron means is that if Sirius is brooding or something, you had someone to step in, whereas being alone somewhere with him probably isn’t good for you,” Hermione offers.

         Harry’s frown deepens, “Sirius has done a lot for me in the last six weeks. He’s been great to me, for me, he’s a lot healthier and focused on helping me than he was before but even so, he was pretty great when he supported me during the tournament.”

         “It’s not that we think that you shouldn’t spend time with him,” Hermione rushes to assure him despite the fact that she looks like she’s lying.  “It’s just that you’d be better off not spending as much time with him and – and if you came to the Burrow…”

         “I don’t want to go to the Burrow,” Harry states, getting more and more upset at the implications that Sirius is somehow failing Harry or that they should be supervised or something.

         “Well, I mean, maybe some time away or with a proper adult…”

         “Sirius is technically an adult.”

         “Yeah, but he’s not like Mr. Weasley or even Lupin,” Hermione offers.  “He’s not exactly responsible.”

         “He’s perfectly responsible.  He takes great care of me,” Harry retorts.

         “Does he, really?” Ron asks.  “It’s not like he did much of that in that house.”

         “That’s because he wasn’t allowed to take care of me because everyone kept us apart,” Harry replies, bitterly.  He’d been angry to realize that there had been a subtle plot to keep them separated.

         “That was for your protection, Harry,” Hermione states.  “You know that he’s a little bit…”

         “Mental?” Ron supplies.

         “… unsafe sometimes.  He’s just – no one knows what he’s going to do – if he’s going to do right by you – I mean, he is the reason that we were hurt in the DOM…”

         “No, he is not, the Death Eaters are, and you didn’t have to come,” Harry states, angrily.  “I told you that I would go on my own.”

         “I wasn’t going to let you walk into a trap alone,” Hermione states. “Besides, if he had been a little more responsible and a little less reckless, you wouldn’t have thought it was possible that he was even in the DOM.”

“Okay, I’m done.”  He’s not interested in hearing this, why did they hate him?  He did not appreciate that they did this on his birthday – his first birthday with Sirius.  He was too angry to be rational right now and he needs some space.  

         Sirius, clearly sensing something is wrong, looks up, “You okay, kid?”

         “Yeah, I just… need some air,” Harry says, looking for and finding his broom. “I want a break.”

         “Okay, kid.”

***

         It’s sometime later, after Harry’s much calmer, clean and dressed after his long flight in which no one joined him, likely because Sirius knew that he needed space that they have lunch.  He’s pointedly trying to avoid Ron and Hermione, as Tonks and Sirius prompt the conversation.

         “So, what was his first birthday like?” Tonks asks.

         “Uh, well, it was a small birthday,” Sirius states.  “I didn’t get to be there.  I was on an order mission, and they were in hiding, so obviously not a lot of people could visit, but I bought him his first broom.  It only hovered a foot or two above the ground, but Harry chased down the cat, and I got a kick of that.  Lily sent me a picture and told me that James was excited that Harry was going to be a quidditch player, said he was a natural on a broom – I imagine that he was beyond cheering when Harry was made the youngest seeker in a century.”

         “It was a funny memory to see.”  Harry laughs. “And I get the feeling he was based on excited he was at the possibility.  You mentioned that cat before, it looked terrified.  That poor cat.”

         “You saw the memory?” Hermione asks.  “How?”

         Harry doesn’t want to answer her, but says, “Okay, well, technically, it was a similar memory rather than the original, but he said that it was close enough.”

         “Yes, I did,” Sirius says, to stop further questioning that would only annoy Harry, “But I didn’t tell you about the day you were born…”

         Harry knew that Sirius had been there on the day he was born.  Given the special circumstances, the Prophecy, someone was with his mother at all times, so if James was gone, basically Sirius was there.  James had been gone on the day he’d been born, and Sirius had taken her to the maternity ward.

         “You were there?” Tonks asks.

         Sirius nods, “Yeah, I um, I was …I got hurt on an order mission, so I was healing at their house…”

         “Why were you healing at their house?” Hermione asks, as if it were her business.

         “Well, Lily was always insisting that we heal at their house…mainly because I spent a lot of time at their house in general.  I had spare keys…and kind-of lived there -”

         “Why?” Tonks asks.

         Sirius looks a little embarrassed, “I – I never really liked staying alone at my flat, and whenever I got into a fight with my partner or my partner was gone (which was rather often), I’d go over to their house, and spend time with James and Lily, besides, they found out fairly quickly that they needed to go into hiding, so I was helping them not go as stir crazy.  That meant that I basically had a guest room at their house. There was even a name plate on the door.”  He pauses, “And it also meant that I was with Lily when she found out that she was pregnant, and when she had Harry.”

         Harry tries to smile, he can’t help thinking about that information that Remus had been using him a bit made the ‘fights’ even worse.  The fact that Remus fought with him if he wasn’t getting any wasn’t a good look.  “Did you and Remus get into fights that often?”  

He knew that although they weren’t ‘together’, just sleeping together, that he and Remus lived together (in separate rooms, except when they were sleeping together).  He wondered if Sirius and Remus had realized that they were essentially in a relationship – an unhealthy one given it’s origins – (they lived together, had sex, and were friends, they just didn’t go on dates or talk about feelings).  It had started with payback, which means that it could never be a proper relationship – especially given Remus avoiding him if he wasn’t getting any, but that doesn’t mean it wasn’t a relationship.  This is probably why Sirius and Remus settled for just sleeping together after Azkaban (it had killed Sirius that the person he’d been sleeping with for years had been so willing to accept that Sirius was a death eater – even if they weren’t in a relationship).  

         Sirius gives him a look, and a second later he realizes that Sirius hadn’t named his partner because he was keeping it a secret, whether it was from Tonks, Ron or Hermione, he wasn’t sure, but he just blew it wide open.  He knows that none of them would understand a sex-only relationship and may not even understand that they’re both men and it’s acceptable (Sirius had confessed to thinking that Harry might not be accepting hence not telling him because he was a little worried about that).  So, he needs to cover up his mistake.

         “So, where was my dad if you were there?” Harry asks, trying to cover up his slipup.  He knows that Sirius wouldn’t want to get into it here.

         “Oh, he was -” Sirius starts, but Tonks interrupts him.

         “Wait a second, you dated Remus?  I thought – and he – but no…” she stammers.

         “Did I say that?  I didn’t say that.  I never said…”

         “You said, ‘Partner’ and Harry said, ‘Remus’,” Tonks states.

         Harry shrugs, “Maybe it’s another Remus.”

         “Yeah, yeah, I mean, I know other Remuses…”

         “Name another one, then,” Tonks demands.

         “Um…”

         “You know, you two are horrible liars,” Tonks states.

         “What are they lying about?” Remus asks, appearing in the doorway.

         Before either Harry or Sirius could say anything, Tonks asks, “When were you going to tell me that you were in a relationship with Sirius?”

         Remus goes bright red, and says, “We weren’t in a relationship, we were just sleeping together.”

         Sirius hits his hand on his forehead, “Is that really something you want to just… announce?”

         Tonks gives them both looks, “Are you kidding me, right now?  I was half-living with you blokes, what the hell?”

         “I’m sorry you didn’t notice that Remus and I shared my bedroom when he was there.  I’m sorry you didn’t notice the awkwardness between us – we weren’t hiding it but we weren’t exactly making it obvious either and it sucks that you didn’t notice.” Sirius looks at Remus, who still looks like hell, then Tonks, before looking at Harry.  “Look, it’s really none of your business,” Sirius states, plainly, “And if you and Remus decide to be together than you should have that conversation in private, not at Harry’s birthday first birthday party that he can remember.”  He pauses, and asks, “Today’s Harry’s birthday, it’s the first birthday that he gets to spend with us, can we focus on him, please?”

         Tonks looks fairly angry, but Harry gives her a pleading look, and she nods. “So, tell us more Harry’s awesome flying at a year old…”

         “Gladly…”

***

         The rest of the day went by rather fast, Harry was relieved that the discussion about Sirius and Remus ended in favor of stories about Harry or his childhood. Sirius told the story about Harry’s birth.  

         Apparently, James made it to the delivery room just ten minutes before Harry was born, and Sirius, trying not to intrude on something so intimate, tried to leave, but Lily wouldn’t let him.  

         “You didn’t get me this far just to leave,” Lily yells.  “And you’re not missing this!”

         James grabbed ahold of Lily’s left hand and together, he and Sirius coached Lily through Harry’s birth, and Sirius was rewarded with holding Harry first.  

         “You first,” Lily says, exhausted, and looking up at Sirius.  

         “Are you sure?”

         “Yes.”

         Sirius accepts the baby from the healer, looks down at little baby Harry. “Hi, Harry.  You look just like your father, except those eyes.  Look at that, Lily, he’s got your eyes.”

         Lily laughs, “When then it’s a good thing that he’s named after his father, too. Harry James Potter.”  She pauses, glances up at James, before turning to Sirius, “And we’d like you to be his godfather.”

         Sirius was genuinely surprised.  Despite being the best man, and best friend to James, he hadn’t expected the honor of godfather.  “Are you…”

         “Yes, Sirius.  You’ve been supporting me and James, not to mention Harry, since I found out I was pregnant.  You kept us both calm with…everything.  This is what James and I both want.”

         Sirius smiles down at Harry, “Hiya, Harry, I’m Sirius, I’m your godfather.”  

         James laughs, “Yeah, and I’m your father, but you might not know that since you haven’t seen me, yet.”  He moves to Sirius’ side, and looked at his son, “Think I can hold him now, Padfoot?”

         Sirius looks at his godson, before looking at James, “Are you sure I can’t just keep him, Prongs?”

         “Pretty sure.”

         “I love you, Pup,” Sirius says, before reluctantly handing the baby to James.  

         “We love you, too, Prongslet,” James says.

         Lily laughs, “Pup?  Prongslet? What’s next, fawn?”

         “Oooh, fawn, I like it,” James teases.

Lily chuckles, “What’s wrong with Harry?”  She’s teasing.  She knew that the boys would be calling him nicknames, after all, they’d done that since she discovered she was pregnant.

         “Nothing, like there’s nothing wrong with James, but I always call him ‘Prongs’,” Sirius states.  

         “And I call Sirius, ‘Padfoot’, besides, Harry’s now a marauder, so he needs a nickname,” James teases.  

         “He’s ten minutes old,” Lily remarks.  “And you’re already planning on turning him into a little troublemaker?”

“Well, I mean, with me as his father and Sirius as his godfather, it’s destined to be.”

Lily laughs, “Alright, although really, ‘Pup’, Sirius?”

         “What? He’s a baby…and Pup is short for puppy, and since I’m …”

         Lily laughs.  “Alright.”

         The story had made Harry feel absolutely loved.  Knowing that his parents loved him, Sirius loved him, and he finally knew the story of his birth.  They really loved him.  

         Once they were home and alone, laying in bed, Harry says, “Thank you for today.”

         “You don’t have to thank me for giving you a birthday party,” Sirius smiles, slightly. “But I wish I could’ve done it for you sooner.  You deserved that.”

         “You’ve done enough, Sirius.  You’ve been so great to me since you offered me a home the first night we met, and I – I love you so much.”

         “I love you, too, kiddo.”  Sirius smiles at him.  

         Harry feels good hearing that, he already felt loved due to the stories, but it’s nice to hear it for Sirius, again.  He’d never tire of it and he could go to sleep happy.  “Good, good night.”

         Sirius clears his throat and gets up with the help of Regulus, who had been standing on Lily’s other side.  “We don’t have long, Sirius.”

         “What do you mean?” Sirius asks as they take turns hugging him.  

         “It’s not your time.  Harry needs you, but he needs the you from before Azkaban,” James replies.

         “He needs the you that was strong enough to run away at sixteen, and stand up for what he believed in,” Regulus states.

         “He needs the Grim in you, Sirius, the one you’ve lost during the war,” Lily states.

         Sirius is confused, “What?  I don’t understand.”

         “Remember when we looked at your Animagus form?  The Grim, the companion to Death, but protector of the Innocent?” James asks.

         Sirius nods, “Yeah, but I don’t…”

         “Sirius, you lost your purpose.  You were supposed to protect the innocent… like you did with me, when we were kids…” Regulus starts.

         “But then what happened with Remus and Snape…” Lily starts.

         “I wasn’t trying to…” Sirius says, shaking his head.  He never meant for things to get out of hand with Snape and the Willow incident.  

         “We know.”

         “And the war pushed you further and further away from that, and then you…the protector of the innocent…went to Azkaban as an innocent…” Regulus starts.  

         “And spent twelve years there…and only broke out when you knew that Harry needed you to protect him,” James finishes.  “He needs you to protect him, Pads.”

         “From who?  Voldemort?” Sirius asks.  Of course he’d protect him from Voldemort, it was what he’d been trying to do.

         “Yes and no,” Regulus states.  “He needs protection from…”

“From Dumbledore, who wants to manipulate him,” Lily states.

         “From the Ministry, who want to use him,” James states.

         “From Voldemort, who wants to destroy him,” Regulus states.

         Sirius is confused by the mentions of protecting Harry from Dumbledore and the ministry.  He looks through the veil and no longer sees Harry.  If he could protect him, he would be he’s dead.  “How am I supposed to protect him if I’m dead?”

         “Because you’re not staying, Pads,” James says, smiling slightly.  “I know a part of you wants to – and after the year you’ve had, no one supporting you, stopping you from being there for Harry when he needed you – I completely understand.  I know you’ve been suicidal, only holding on for Harry, and a part of you wanted to die so that you could be with me.  It’s part of why you came here tonight, but Sirius, he’s needs you more than I do.  Lily and I, Regulus, we miss you, and I know you miss us, but Harry can’t lose you, too.” James pauses.  “He’s lost too much already.  I want you to let go, and move on, be happy with Harry, live your life with Harry, stop hurting yourself by not letting yourself grieve and move on. It’s okay to miss us, but don’t keep punishing yourself.  And for the love of Merlin, stop drinking.  It’s not helping.”  He stops again, with Sirius nodding.  Sirius understood him.  If he has this chance to go back to Harry, he would make damn sure to make it count.  “I love you, Pads, but the life you’ve lived in last year – isn’t what I would’ve wanted for you.  I want you to be happy.  I want you and my son to be happy.”

         Sirius nods and opens his mouth to respond, when Lily interrupts.

         “We’re running out of time, James,” Lily states.  “Look, Sirius.  We need you to protect Harry.  You’ll go back, and be sixteen, so that you can be by his side to protect him.”

         “That’s the age you started losing your purpose,” James explains.

         Sirius nods, it made sense to him.  

         “One more thing: Dumbledore already knows this, but hasn’t told anyone, Voldemort made horcruxes.  One of them Kreacher saved – it’s at Grimmauld place…” Regulus starts.

         “One of them Harry killed – ask him about the Basilisk,” Lily offers.

         “Basilisk,” Sirius mouths, but no one responds, James just continues.

         “And another that Dumbledore’s onto – he should find it this summer,” James offers.

         “And Bella had another one – try claiming her vault when you’re freed,” Regulus finishes.

         Sirius looks at him.  “Horcruxes? What – how?  How many?  Is that why you died?”

         “You know that letter you’ve been refusing to read since you found it after the New Year?” Regulus asks, and Sirius nods.  “It explains everything I know.  Read it.”

         Sirius nods.  He looks over at the three of them, “How much time do we have?”

         “Not much.  Harry needs you more than we do,” Lily replies.  “We love you, Sirius, and we love Harry.  And we are so proud of him.  Please tell him that.”

         “I love you, too, Lily-pad, and I will,” he says after Lily hugs him.  

         “And we don’t blame you for what happened with Peter.  None of us saw that coming,” James assures him.  “I know that the dementors made you think otherwise, but we don’t blame you, and you can’t change the past.  Take this second chance with Harry and make sure that he kicks Voldemort’s ass – if he wants, it’s okay if he doesn’t.”  James pulls him into a hug.  “I love you, Pads, you’ve done great with what you’ve had to deal with, and now, you have a real chance to be what always should have been with Harry, a family.”

         “I love you, too, Prongs.”

         “Also, tell the bitch Petunia that I plan to haunt her,” James states.  Even knowing that he can’t.  

         “James!” Lily yells, but she doesn’t correct him.  “Although, I don’t disagree after seeing her treatment of Harry, actually that reminds me, you forgot about our cottage by the sea.  You forgot our plan in case the worst happens.  New identities, a safe house only the three of us knew about, and our plan to be put Harry’s safety first.  I know that you have had many missteps in your memory lately, so I’m reminding you, go there – do not go back to Petunia.  He was never supposed to go there in the first place and she doesn’t deserve safety or compassion after the way she treated my son.”  He’d never heard her voice so hard and cold, not even through the fights with James before they were together.  “If Harry wants to protect her, then warn her, but don’t go out of your way for her, although I would suggest not telling Dumbledore.”

         “I wouldn’t tell anyone, Pads,” James adds, stressing the word anyone.  That must mean Remus as well.  Clearly James wasn’t too happy with him.  Then again, Remus had failed Harry more than Sirius had, of course he’d be angry with him.  

         Sirius nods before turning to Regulus as he speaks.  “Read my letter and know that I wish I had been brave like you. Remember to kick Voldemort’s ass for me, too – if you want,” Regulus hugs him.  “I love you, brother.”

         “I love you, too, Reg.  Really, I wish I could have done more for you,” Sirius says.  

         “I know, I know, and what you can do for all of us, help Harry kick Voldemort’s ass…”

         “But you don’t have to, Pads.  While you can, it’d be nice, but I don’t want you or my son here earlier than necessary, so…”

         “So, if you want to – it’s okay not to finish Voldemort, as long as you keep Harry protected,” Lily states.  “We love you, we love Harry, and neither of you deserve to have this war on your heads. It’s a choice, and we will respect that.”

         Sirius nods, “Will do.”

         “Now go, protect my son,” Lily says, and Sirius nods, again.

         “Thank you, all of you.”

         With one final look, he walks back out of the veil.  He feels clearer than he has in years, and ignoring everyone in the veil room, he runs after Harry.  As soon as he can he transforms into Padfoot, determined to find Harry as soon as possible. It doesn’t take long before he’s up in the atrium, and he sees Harry on the floor, the crowd by the fireplaces, Dumbledore in the middle, and Voldemort apparating away with Bellatrix.

         Harry looks in his direction, and sees Sirius as Padfoot, “Sirius?”

         Padfoot jumps up on him as soon as Harry stands up.  Harry hugs Padfoot, who turns into Sirius.  “Harry!  You’re okay. I’m okay.”

         “You’re okay, but you…” he gasps.  

         “It’s a long story.  For another time, another place.”  

         “You died,” Harry says into his neck, he can feel the tears that tell him that Harry’s crying.  “I lost you.”

Sirius doesn’t let go, as he says, “But I’m here now, I’m back, and I’m not going anywhere.  I promise.  I’m never leaving you, again.”

“But you –”

“I’m never leaving you, again.  Don’t think about what almost happened.”  He leans back just enough to look Harry in his eyes.  “I’m meant to be here to protect you, okay?  So, don’t think about it.  I’m here, and I’m not going anywhere.”

It’s hard to see if Harry believes him, even as he hugs him, again, clearly not ready to let go – not that Sirius blamed him, he didn’t want to let go either.

         “Sirius, I need to send Harry back to school…” Dumbledore starts, moving towards him.

         “Then I’m going with him.  I’m not leaving him, again.”

         Sirius stares Dumbledore down, and he relents if only because there’s an audience. “I’m sending you to the entrance hall, and I’ll send you a note for a meeting once I’ve cleared things up here to discuss things.”

     Harry was currently flying around the yard with Tonks, who’s not nearly as skilled on a broom.  Although that didn’t matter.  To Harry, all that mattered was that he was in the air, flying again, after a year of being banned, it was amazing to be on his firebolt again.  Especially when Sirius let the practice snitch go, and he caught it within a minute.  He let it go and caught it again, repeatedly.  Tonks tried to beat him to it, but he was just too good.

         “Well, it’s a good thing you’ll be captain,” Sirius states as he lands.

         Harry laughs, “Well, I’m surprised it’s not Katie since we’ve been on the team for the same amount of time, and she’s technically older…and you know…wasn’t given a lifetime ban.”

         “You know it wasn’t actually legal what Umbridge did, right?  She can ban you from playing for the house team, but if you wanted to play professionally it was never going to stick, and stealing your firebolt…”

         “Like the ministry would care that she was doing illegal things.”

         Sirius frowns, since he knows about Umbridge’s attacks on Harry (having seen the scars and attempting to heal them to no avail), but he just throws an arm about Harry’s shoulder, and ignores the mention of her.  “Well, regardless, you’re an amazing flier.  Well, I knew that …I watched you your third year, and even fourth year against the dragon…but seriously, you were doing circles around Tonks, you caught the snitch a dozen times in an hour…you definitely deserve captain.”

         “Thanks for the vote of confidence…” Harry starts.  “Wait, you watched me at the first task?”

         “Of course I did.  I was already back in the country and living in that cave…I wasn’t going to wait for a letter…that’s too late to do anything, so I …snuck on the grounds and watched as Padfoot,” Sirius states.

         Harry smiles, “I wish I had known that.  Just knowing that I had more than Hermione in the stands…would have…made a lot of difference.”

         “I should’ve told you…I just…you were dealing with enough, that’s why I didn’t see you on the trips into Hogsmeade…until March.”

         Harry nods.  “It’s nice to reflect on it, now.”

         “Just another reason you’re a wonderful godfather, Padfoot,” Remus states.

         “Yeah…not everyone thinks that way…” Sirius trails off, and Harry knows he’s talking about the order and Mrs. Weasley.  Well, Harry didn’t care what anyone else thought, Sirius was a wonderfully amazing godfather.  The only adult that had ever truly been there for him.  The only adult Harry truly trusted from the beginning, and he wasn’t going to let the order’s or the Weasley parents’ opinions cause Sirius to doubt himself.

         “I do,” Harry says.  “And as your godson, I’m the only one that matters.”

         Sirius smiles, obviously happy that Harry thought so much of him.  

         “He’s right, Padfoot.  Only one hell of a godfather does what you did that year,” Remus states.  “And I have to apologize, Harry, I should have been there for you as well.”

         Harry nods, stiffly.  He’s trying to forgive and trust Remus, but it’s hard.  “It’s nice for you to apologize, but uh, well, it’s a little…pointless now.”  Although it helped.  After talking to Sirius and realizing his issues, Harry knew that he needed the acknowledgment that it wasn’t okay.

         Remus nods, “Well, since Sirius will be with you this year, I could write you instead…”

         “Me too!  Me too!” Tonks insists as she runs back from putting her broom in the shed.  She links her left arm with Harry’s right.  “I can be the big sister you never wanted.”

         Harry snorts, “How about you could be the big sister I always wanted?”

         She smirks, and her hair flashes a few different colors, “Even better!”

         Harry smiles, “And I would like that, Remus.  Hedwig might actually like me again if I start writing more. Sometimes, I think she gets affronted by my lack of using her.”

         “I agree.  Although we wouldn’t be able to share sensitive information… unless we encoded them like we were joking about the other night,” Harry offers.  

         “Or we can always use the mirrors that Prongslet forgot about…” Sirius says, trailing off, reminding Harry about the mess that could have been avoided had he known about the mirrors.  Harry frowns, upset at the reminder and a bit upset that he’s giving his mirror to Remus, but he could understand that it doesn’t make sense for Sirius to keep his when he’ll be at Harry’s side for the foreseeable future.

         “It wasn’t my fault!  You weren’t very clear, and I was worried that you’d so something reckless like barge into the castle and get yourself arrested or killed…I couldn’t lose you, so I… no matter how badly I wanted to talk to you…I just…didn’t …” Harry says, suddenly upset.  

         “Oh, kid, look at me,” Sirius says.  Stopping them in their tracks and looking directly Harry.  Harry looks up at him.  “I’m sorry that I made you think I would’ve done something stupid…and I’m sorry that you thought – that in a way – you lost me.  But I’m here now, and I’m not going anywhere, okay?”

         Harry nods.  Even after weeks of having Sirius by his side, he still dreamt of losing him, still worried he’d wake up one day and Sirius would be gone, still worried that somehow this was a dream.  Sirius often had to remind him that no matter what happened in the past, he would never leave him, again, but his fears were real.  He couldn’t shake those thoughts; those worries and he’s trying so hard to move on.

         “I want to hear you say it.”

         “I know you’re not going to leave me,” Harry says, automatically.  It was something he ended up saying nearly every day, at Sirius’ instance whenever he begins worrying again.  

         “Good.”  Sirius gives him a hug, and as odd as it is, Remus and Tonks join in.