#rf ondorus

Ondorus woke the next morning smiling from what he thought was nothing but a warm dream until the sleep fell off him like a shroud and he realized it hadn’t been a dream. That the night he’d spent with Carlos was real, and warmth and dread spread through him in equal measure. He wished it didn’t have to be like this. He wished he could have woken next to Carlos this morning with no guilt or fear; just love and comfort between them. He sighed, and rose from his bed, dressed quickly, and exited his tent, pouring into the heat of the desert. He hadn’t realized how long he’d overslept until he looked around, seeing most of his comrades out and about, the sun high over their heads. He hoped his absence hadn’t been noted too deeply. Tentatively, he made his way into the settlement. 

He hadn’t made it two steps from his tent when Zaid came up beside him, looking him over slowly.

“Long night?” he asked, and Ondorus’ throat squeezed tight.

“You could say that,” he said, slowly. Zaid looked him over for a moment.

“Are you sure you’re okay? You’ve been really...twitchy.”

“I’m okay, Zaid. I promise,” Ondorus told him, rubbing his temples. At least he hadn’t lied about the long night. He’d lain awake in the afterglow for hours after returning home, not able to sleep.

“Are you sure?” Zaid pressed again. Ondorus smiled at him.

“Absolutely sure.”

Zaid didn’t say anything else, just nodded. They parted ways after a few comments about inane things, but Ondorus couldn’t shake off the shame of lying the rest of the day.

When night fell, Ondorus slipped out quietly as always, looking behind him to make sure no one followed, and made his way to his and Carlos’ spot. He was already there, and any negative feelings melted away when Ondorus saw his face. It was like coming home, and he wondered when the settlement stopped feeling like home. This was where he belonged, right here with Carlos. They kissed as soon as they saw each other, warm and sweet, and Carlos’ arms closed around him like a warm blanket. 

“Miss me?” Carlos asked, a cheeky smile on his face. Ondorus pretended to think about that, until Carlos shook his head and kissed him again.

“Of course I missed you,” Ondorus conceded. “I always miss you,”

“I know, bro, I miss you all the damn time.”

“Are you still going to refer to me as ‘bro’ after last night?” Ondorus laughed.

“You prefer ‘dude?’“ Carlos shot back, a goofy smile on his face. Ondorus shook his head with mock disapproval, but the smile at the edges of his mouth gave him away.

They sat, holding hands as though they didn’t want a moment to go by when they weren’t touching. The rest of the night, they simply talked, telling each other about their day, laughing together about Zaid’s fight with one of the woolies in the settlement 

“Wait,” Carlos said laughing, “like the white fluffy ones? How do you even fight with those.”

“Woolies are surprisingly eloquent,” Ondorus said, and they dissolved into giggles again. 

“Are they?” Carlos said after a long moment of companionable silence.

“Are they what?”

“Woolies. Are they eloquent?” 

“Oh yes,” Ondorus said. “One in particular, actually, has a very interesting point of view. He doesn’t live in the Settlement, but he pops by.”

“That’s cool man,” Carlos said, looking a little taken aback. “I guess it’s weird knowing they can communicate with you guys.”

“I suppose from your standpoint, it must be, but they’re simply our comrades in the Settlement,” Ondorus explained. 

“Gotcha, bro,” Carlos said, easy as anything, and Ondorus felt a wave of affection wash over him. He wasn’t sure why he kept thinking Carlos would have a breaking point, with how different they were, but he never seemed to.

They parted that night with a lingering kiss and the promise of tomorrow. Ondours made his way home, free of whatever worries he had had before. Within a few short hours, Carlos had melted away all of his fears, and that night he slept warmly, safely, and woke the next morning early and bright.

When he exited his tent, Zaid was there waiting for him. He looked white, and Ondorus felt his stomach drop into his toes. 

“Zaid? What’s the matter?” he asked, quietly. 

“You wouldn’t lie to me, would you Ondorus?” Zaid asked, slowly, meaningfully.

“No, Zaid, of course not.”

“Then why haven’t you told me you’re consorting with a human?” Zaid accused, and Ondorus felt the blood drain from his face.

“You followed me,” he said simply. Zaid looked away, pursing his lips.

“I shouldn’t have had to, but you’ve been so secretive. So I figured I’d find out why and I see you...” he trailed off, shaking. 

“How much did you see?”

“Does it matter?” Zaid snapped, turning back to him. “A human, Ondorus! How could you?”

“Please tell me you didn’t tell Kuruna,” Ondorus pleaded. This was bad. He imagined Kuruna’s face as Zaid told her what he’d seen. The disappointment, the anger. 

“No, but I should,” Zaid spat. 

“Please don’t.”

“I won’t,” Zaid said. “I should but I won’t. As long as you never see him again.” Ondorus floundered for a response. Never see Carlos again? How could he? Not when he’d fallen so hard and so absolutely. But if Kuruna found out...

“Okay,” Ondorus whispered. “Okay.” 

Zaid nodded, and turned away.

“Now don’t talk to me for a while,” he said coldly, and left. Ondorus turned back to his tent, hiding the tears that had quickly ran from his eyes. 

“Goodbye Carlos,” he whispered to the winds. “Goodbye.

That night Carlos sat in the cold desert air, waiting for Ondorus. He stayed until the night grew long, and the sun rose from the horizon. 

Ondorus never came.