#reverse pinescone

Fight! Dipper: Leave it to me.

Fight! Dipper: Centaurs have six limbs and are therefore insects. Discuss.

Rev! Dipper, Bill and Fight! Wirt: *Immediately begins arguing*

Well just imagine Rev! Wirt

Instead of being a shy and serious guy he’d be the overdramatic theatre kid everyone either really loves or really hates.

He’d wear loose shirts that that aren’t completely buttoned up and constantly have the hot, messy I-just-woke-up look and he won’t clean his messes.

Instead of being the one getting Bill (or in this case Will) and Dipper out of violence/trouble and calming their arguments down he would be the devil on your shoulder encouraging it and maybe starting some fights and getting in trouble himself.

He would abuse the power of being Dipper’s (and Will if you’re a poly/multi shipper) boyfriend without hesitating and not be polite or respectful to anyone, including to Dipper.

Except Will. Will would be the exception.

He flirts with everyone, mostly Dipper though, and is in constant need for attention. He would be the incarnation of “IM GAY AND IN NEED OF ATTENTION!”

He would still write poems, but instead of them being romantic like canon Wirt, they would be the type to cause a one-night stand.

He is the town’s charmer and playboy, yet no matter how many people he flirts with, his eyes are only set for Dipper (and Will)

He is well-read like his canon counterpart, but enjoying the sophisticated or famous works of Sylvia Plath, Edgar Allen Poe, Earnest Hemingway, and Jane Austen would be a secret he takes to his grave (until he finds out Will and Dipper actually like those writers and decides to be somewhat more open about his romantic poet side)

He definitely a Hamilton nerd because canon Wirt definitely is and you cannot tell me otherwise, but for different reasons.

He loves Hamilton for its active, go-crazy songs like Lafayette’s rapping or the king’s possessive songs (while canon Wirt likes the more poetic, romantic or serious songs like Burn and Who Tells Your Story)

Rev! Wirt would defiantly be the type to keep up with fast-paces songs and knows the entire playlist to his favorite musicals and songs like the back of his hand.

He’s not afraid of challenges, especially drinking or singing contests, because how many lyrics he knows and how high his alcohol tolerance is.

He doesn’t get along with Rev! Pacifica that much because before he started dating Dipper, she would constantly streak his attention from Wirt when Dipper still had a crush on her.

Also yes I do ship Rev! Pacifica and Rev! Mabel whether you like it or not.

So I’ve seen like one post about Reverse! Wirt and reverse Pinescone and how he’s a tall, messy crackhead theatre kid

And I would like to add my own

(I may have done this before and accidentally deleted the post idk I thought I did this once but I couldn’t find the post so if I did do this before someone tell me)

I’m also gonna do one for Fight! Wirt

Because if there’s a Rev! Wirt, there’s one for Fight Falls

His poetry is good, but not the slow, romantic gentle kind normal Wirt likes. His is more sensual, visual the kind to start a hook up. Like you better watch out for poetry man or before you know it you’ll be in his bed

He regularly reads and quotes Shakespeare and no Romeo and Juliet isn’t his favorite (it’s his second favorite)

His favorite is A Midsummer Night’s Dream because crazy witch and fairy shit just happens in it and he loves it.

He has a habit of running his fingers through his hair when he’s nervous and usually doesn’t do this in front of people which is why his hair is constantly messy

He constantly flirts with Mason but it either fails to land everytime or he just flats out ignores it

He likes to dramatically spread himself on those long velvet chairs when he’s upset

He definitely spoils himself during Mason’s parties and uses the “I-know-the-rich-guy” advantages to their full extent

He (this is going with a Will Cipher Headcanon I mentioned sometime ago) definitely knows Will is a masochist and Mason has no clue and just finds it really fucking funny and regularly congratulates Will

He likes gossiping with Rev! Mabel a lot.

Abstract art. Museums, making his own, he likes it. It’s chaotic, colorful, and random. Perfect.

Whereas Wirt is naturally more romantic and sexually awkward, it’s the total opposite. He can get laid whenever he wants with whoever he wants, but the moment he gets romantically close to someone he panics.

He’s an expert on tropes and cliches, and can quote any vine from memory. Anyone who has had a good 10 minute conversation with him where he’s not flirting with you can vouch, he is a fucking meme dispenser.

Mason and Will always fret over his messiness and he knows he’s messy and half of it is just because he knows it ticks them all off and he enjoys every second of it

He and Bill would be best friends though—gay wingmen. They would regularly complain and whine about their Dippers if they met.

Never give him those long stripes of streamers. Don’t even think about duct tape. You don’t want to know the damage he can do with glue involved.

He and Regular Mabel would also be best friends.

He enjoys the sweetest and coldest tea ever! He will physically cringe at the smell of coffee get that shit away from him.

He’s very flexible. Very flexible. And yeah, good for in bed but what he does to stretch is the TRUE HORROR.

Y’know silk dancing? Where people wrap themselves on a long strand of silk really high in the air? It’s like pole dancing but with silk. I don’t know if it’s supposed to be erotic like pole dancing, but I just think it’s pretty cool and elegant, so yeah. He can do that.

You also know acrobats and all those stunts Zendaya pulls of during that song Rewirte the Stars from the Greatest Showman (which I think is a great movie, great music) with all the ropes and the hoop and stuff? He also can do that.

Someone do an animatic of him and Reverse Dipper with that song. I would, but as I mentioned several times before, I can’t draw worth shit.

You know those white silk shirts with low v-necks and very loose and float long sleeves? He’s almost never seen without one. His addiction had become an urban myth. No one can figure out if he has several of the same shirt or constantly washes that one, not even Will the demon. No one knows and no will ever know.

One that ominous note, y’all reblog this with your own headcanons

Rev!Wirt: I'm trying!

Rev!Paz: Yeah! Fuck- wait what?