#researchtext

On the 23rd of May, Nihan and I presented a seminar on Craftivism. 

Craftivism is about marrying craft and activism. Craft is about the process, material, and form and we’ve mentioned how activism can be applied to these aspects of the craft. 

Unbreakable moment of feeling good

Creating events on a smooth surface

Going with the flow

But clever

To take the right one

Instead of not having it all

It is unbreakable

It is solid

It shouldn’t be tagged or

“Defined”

But

It can be

At somewhere

In the corner

As a gem

As a waiting priest

Giving constant birth

Inside in

Not possible to be away

But not with it at all

In the corner

Like a gem

Inseparable

I took this photo last night in my room. 

These are pink tulips that I brought to my room, even though they are not for indoors, to make good wishes for my mom’s little operation on her waist. 

Anyways, at night, with the light coming from the street, I loved the way they look in this setting. They meant to be alive, bright, shiny, colorful but under the dark light, they shine in such a silent and poetic way. They look way more beautiful to me rather than under the daylight. 

This sense of hidden/waiting beauty under the dark setting is such a good metaphor for my work. Great references and dots are connecting together. I need to find a way to clarify it for the summer show. 

I want to talk about the piece of text I’ve found on London Bridge.

I was there to throw 2 little spring coming wish notes to the river. And found this text. 

I am actually a person who is really tired of these positivity images but the was it talk about the ‘it gets better’ phrase way quite impressive for me. How these phrases are overly used, how they don’t mean what they need to anymore, how positivity started to lose its meaning, how mental problems should be considered and analyzed in terms of solutions?

It’s such a profound subject and positivity shouldn’t be the only way. Melancholia has a part of this healing process. That what I want to talk about in my project. This is what I do. 

I want to talk about these 2 photographs. These are taken by photographer Charlotte Dumas. She is Dutch and 41 years old. My friend C sent her other works and I found out horse photographs.

Horses are such inspiration for me. Even their physical presence is quite big, the way they stand, look and act is extremely divine. 

I think they are melancholic.

I think they are wise.

I think they are silent by birth.

I think they imagine themselves on a sphere while they’re running.

I think they always feel young.

I think they are not insisting but they know what they want.

I think their ability to hear the music better than a human being.

I think they are sad.

I think they are not looking for happiness.

I think as much as they get freer, the pain in their gut gets bigger.

I want to talk about this painting.

It is created by Belgian artist Max Vanderleenen in 2012 and it is titled: “Man falling forward”

I’ve found it while I was researching on exhibitions subjected to melancholy and depression. It is from Dark Chambers exhibition at Museum Dr. Guislain in Gent, Belgium. The museum is also converted from a mental health hospital. 

The reason that this painting impressed me a lot is that the action of “falling” can be seen as a “forwarding act’. Even though emotions are taking us away from what we have to deal in our daily lives, slow down us, stops us; emotions must be embraced because they can cause solitude that may enlighten profound ways in our lives.

The way artist depicts such poetic “fall” in forwarding direction is such a clever way of using visuality to talk about what I want to say emotions. It shouldn’t be negating. It is more than that. 

Melancholy is the opposite of what is expected of the modern ego

Failure as a notion can be about not succeeding but, it can also be a way to find new opportunities to accomplish the idea. It can bring unplanned directions and bring surprising conclusions.

But I want to talk about failure as intention; As a purpose to not create certain shapes, not trying to complete a pre-imagined figure, not starting with aim. It is almost a full allowance to intuitions to give directions to the path. Intuitions bring the coincidences and it tells you to where to finish the work. It tells where it needs to stop. Maybe failure as the intention is an introvert conversation. Maybe it is a performative act.

I'm thinking about what is the importance of it. And I think most appealing part of this intentionally-failing-practice is its closeness to reality. French sculptor and performer, Olivia de Sagazan choose these words to talk about his work: "I am flabbergasted in seeing to what degree people think its normal, to be alive. Disfigurement in art is a way to make face to face to real life!"

If I would expose failure in terms of existence, I would bond it with absence. Because I believe absence is also a way to exist in the world like a still shot in a movie or a silent interlude in music composition. So maybe, failure as intention, as the aim itself, is a way to exist; rather than only an -accident-.

Below image is from one of Sagazan’s performances; Transfiguration. What I see in this image is allowing messiness, disfigurement, failure to transform his body to express his ideas. For me this image suggesting failure as intention, as almost an entity.

Image from: http://olivierdesagazan.com/