"why did you have to leave?"
Ā Ā Ā He didnāt want to, he didnāt want to, he didnāt want toā¦ HE DIDNāT WANT TO HE DIDNāT WANT TO HE DIDNāT WANT TO - HE DIDNāT FUCKING WANT TO. Bony fingers grip the rims of the wheelchair so tightly that the tips of Ginshiās fingers were turning white from the pressure. HEāS ANGRY, HEāS UPSET. The range of emotions he was feeling was too vast for him to explain, let alone understand them for himself. He doesnāt know what he should feel anymore. Hatred, regret, that aching in his heart? What exactly was that? To be found in such a position by someone who heĀ admiredĀ could never want to see him in such a pathetic position was in some ways TRAUMATIC.Ā
Ā Ā Ā To be seen with such judgemental eyes ( had he changed? had Kuki Urie changed how he saw people? would he see Shirazu as something more than he was now? Or less than he was before? ), the very same eyes he knew would look down on him before, for those eyes to see him in a stained hospital gown, for those eyes to see him pale as a ghost, for those eyes to see him aimlessly moving about in this fucking chair. Was it shame that Ginshi felt? Embarrassment? What was it.Ā . .WHAT WAS IT?
Ā Ā Ā ā Donāt look at me like that. ā Words are spoken sternly, filled with nothing but aggression. Teeth grit and his head tilts to the left. HE LOOKS LIKE A DOG. Small dog, tiny dog, big down, large dog, lost dog, good dog, bad dog, sad dog, mad dog, puppy dog, doggy dog, fighting dog, guard dog, attack dog, Matsuriās dog. Whoās the dog? URIEāS THE DOG. A dogās nose has up to three hundred million olfactory receptors, thatās forty times greater than a human, and even at that a Quinx squad memberās number of olfactory receptors would be increased after going under the knife. If Urieās the dog, why couldnāt he sniff out Ginshi? FIND GINSHIĀ FIND GINSHIĀ FIND GINSHI!Ā Or was that too much of a hassle? Or was he all bark no bite? Howling hounds in the night who would scatter in the daylight.
Ā Ā Ā Other things came first, more important things came first, better things to do came first, everything came first before finding Ginshi. Why bother looking for a man everyone believed to be dead? His carcass was stolen. Why bother looking? Heās dead. DEAD DEAD DEAD DEAD! HEāS A FUCKING DEAD MAN!
Ā Ā Ā ā Donāt put the blame on me, you heard? ā Anger rushes through him, and heās wheeling himself towards the other. Hands pushing the chair faster and faster till he can no longer grab hold of the rims. GinshiĀ canāt stop now, heās flying from the seat right onto the ground. PATHETIC BOY. Heās laying face first on the ground, you could hear his skull hit the concrete, face busted open, he broke his nose. STUPID BOY. Fists bawl up and Ginshi can feal thick hot tears rolling down his cheeks. WEAK BOY.Ā ā Iām sorry Iām sorry Iām sorry Iām sorry Urie, iāmsorryiāmsorryiāmsorrryiāmsosorry. .Ā . ā HEāS SOBBING NOW, HE WANTS TO GO HOME.
Ā Ā Ā Kuki Urieā¦take him home. Please for the love of god, TAKE HIM HOME!
