#relective

"The thing you must understand about me, my dear. Is that deep down, at the core of my being, is massive self loathing. Its responsible for my bloody knuckles and the scars on my skin. My bad habits and my laziness. Its responsible for thousands of messed up situations and missed opportunities. It is why that I will really never be able to love anyone. I've always been more preoccupied hating myself to give a shit about you. Shortness of breath, and mood swings. Never saying what i mean and putting myself in terrible situation cause i think i couldn't deserve any better. It is the voice in the back of your head that asked why do you even fucking bother? every time things could get better It is all encompassing and inescapable. So ill ask you again, Why do you want be be anywhere near me? Just let me die in peace."

Essentially the process started off when we were told that we had to get into groups to plan and produce a radio show that included music and subjects of discussion of our choice. We could choose the percentage of music and the percentage of discussion, but we were told for the purpose of this project that we would have to have more discussion than music, but this didn't really happen in the end of our radio show as we ran out of time and didn't have enough subjects to discuss or expand on.

We obtained information about local bands and solo artists as well as ones that used to be local. This information was from various sources including the internet and the Bridgwater Mercury newspaper. My group was a group of four and the target audience were 16-35 year olds due to the type of music played and the topics of discussion would appeal mostly to that age group. We also listed some local gigs in the area. Our show was called 'Access to Avalon'.

A particularly useful source was lemonrock.com which is a website that lists gigs, bands, solo artists and DJ's. To find information about past and future gigs, bands, solo artists and DJ's in our local area we typed in the search term 'Somerset' into the search box provided on the website's home page and it displayed loads of useful information, some of which we used and other bits we didn't. This source was recommended by one of our group members. We also used Facebook to communicate effectively with fellow group members and to find local solo artists and bands and ones that used to be local.

To make sure there was a natural flow it was decided not to have a proper script for our show. Instead we used improvisation so it seemed like a genuine real conversation. We also used a combination of notes and my rough introduction that I typed up that developed into more of a rough outline of the whole show rather than the introduction. These were used as prompts and pointers to guide us so there would be less delays and pauses, and there would be less risk of people not knowing what to say.

We had limited resources at the location where we were situated so we had to make do with a newspaper and making notes as there were no computers whatsoever apart from the laptops which people brought in. I think our team worked well under pressure under the circumstances and with the limited time that we had, so we managed our time well and effectively, especially since this was the first time any of us had worked at a proper radio station.

The kit and equipment was hard to handle and I mucked up with the SFX as I played the wrong beds at the wrong times but my group members assisted me on changing them to the correct beds in the end. We didn't even get far enough to use a single punctuator (which separates songs) or sweeper (which separates commercials). We had a lowdown segment at the start before our show started followed by a music positioner which was a compilation of the type of music played on the station. We didn't have any promos. Another group member used faders to fade between the discussions and the music. He was operates the mixing/sound desk. He answered questions, added the occasional comment and talked about a recent interview he conducted with a local act. The whole show was hypothetical so it will never be broadcast on their radio station and the interview the group member conducted was made up as he has never really met the local artist and he never really conducted an interview with him.

My role was originally going to be one of the main people speaking into the microphone but I was demoted to the person who operates the touch screen (which has software on it which was especially created for the radio station) and the person who adds the occasional comment when asked questions. We had three microphones and two headphones as the third set of headphones was taken by a person recording in a different studio. We had two main presenters.

I didn't really 'get' the whole experience and it's just made me think radio is harder than I originally thought. It makes me not want to go into it more so now. People treated me like I was stupid but I never done anything much like that in my life. I felt like they expected too much of me and for me to know it off by heart. There was an issue raised of time wasting but I didn't think that was really my fault as it wasn't made clear who should go down to the studio to inspect the technical aspects where and when. It was really discreet with people just slipping off whenever really. We did swap roles and nobody was prepared for that and it wasn't mentioned whether we could swap roles or not so we did anyway as we thought it would be easier that way in the long run. It would've been better if all of us could have gone down in groups into the studio before the day of the actual recording regardless if whether your role was technical or not. They could've explained the technical aspects to everyone rather than just the technical people to avoid any mess ups or confusion so if the chance of a role change arised there wouldn't be an issue. It just seemed the whole thing was too much sitting around and not enough action just waiting for the studio to be available. We could've been doing something more constructive but we couldn't because of the lack of resources.