#random incorrect quotes

Ajax: really? that's cool...

Tyler: do you think she'll notice me?

Ajax: *looks him up and down*

Wednesday and Enid: Can you knock that door down so we can enter inside?

Tyler: I want a doghot.

Wednesday: You mean a hotdog?

Tyler: NO. I WANT A DOGHOT. RIGHT NOW.

---

A few moments later

Tyler:

Enid: Why, they scare you or something?

Tyler, still chewing: No. They taste funny.

Enid: *Looks down on her nuggets*

Enid: ...Do they taste like chicken nuggets?

Tyler: Not at all silly. Ooh, what do you think serial killers taste like?

Enid: I don't know, probably like you???!!!

*Our three favorite redheads are trapped in the school basement*

Austin Q: *After Simon accidentally destroys some old school trophies while trying to escape* Ooh! You're in trouble!

Nathaniel: Hey! Nobody is in trouble! When it comes time to confess about the old trophies- and the confiscated candy- we'll just blame it on the evil basement shark.

Austin Q: The what?

Nathaniel: *Points to Austin Q's shark plushies sitting in the corner of the room*

Austin Q: But... That's not real! Jaws is my friend!

Nathaniel: No, Austin. Jaws is anything but your friend. They say these demons come alive at night and swim around through the air. Then it shall devour the souls of teenagers!

Austin Q: ... Yeah right! I don't believe that.

Nathaniel: And when the lights go out. The evil basement shark comes to life! *Cuts off the light, and every time he turns it back on, the plushie gets closer to Austin Q until it's on his head*

Austin Q: *Screams* IT'S EATING MY SOUL!

Simon: *Laughs* I love male bonding!

-

Austin Q: We're goners! *Cries*

Nathaniel: Relax! We'll just call someone to come get us out.... Except my phone's upstairs.

Simon: Mine too.

Austin Q: I've got mine! *Pulls out his phone and sees the battery is almost dead* But the battery's almost dead. I'll just text Armbruster to come save us. *Starts texting* Hey, blonde bitch. Come and get us out the basement. Also, tell Tomassian he still owes me fifty bucks, or I'm gonna kick his ass- Battery's dead.

Simon: Well, maybe if you didn't text like a grandma!

Austin Q: At least I had my phone!

Nathaniel: Guys, calm down. Now the one thing we can all agree on is... Austin is the worst texter ever!

-

Simon: Someone's at the door! *He, Nathaniel, and Austin Q rush to the door and knock as loud as they can* Help!

Nathaniel: We're stuck!

Austin Q: Get us out of here!

*Marc is on the other side*

Marc: Oh, God! The evil basement shark! It followed us from Greece! *Runs away* Curse you, shark! Curse you!

Kidnapper: I have your partner. Allison: What? I don't have a partner… Kidnapper: Then who just called me a lowlife b**** and spit in my face? Allison: Oh my god, you have Brodee.

Allison: What? I'm not aggressive! Brodee : Last Tuesday, you wacked me with a pair of crocs and stole my chocolate chips? Allison: Survival of the fittest, b****.

Allison: Good morning. Cole: Good morning. Lloyd: Good morning. Raelyn: You all sound like robots, try spicing it up a bit. Brodee: MORNING MOTHERF***ERS!

Lloyd: What do rainbows mean to you? Allison: Gay rights. Brodee: There's money. Raelyn: The sign of God's promise to never destroy the whole Earth with a flood. Cole: It is an optical phenomenon that separates sunlight into its continuous spectrum when the sun shines on raindrops.

Zane: Mice are having sex in my walls. Jay: Tattletale! Kai: You're just being ungrateful. Cole: It's their home too, you know. Lloyd: So what? Don't slutshame them. Zane: The mice are fucking AND now I'm getting heckled.

Kai: You know what? Kai: When I join this friend group I thought you guys would be dealing with my bullshit. Zane, Cole and Jay continue screaming about mold water Kai: Not the other way around. Lloyd: I dunno, sounds like you need to drink the mold water.