#ramblog

Attempting to be rational is admirable, but emotion itself is not meant to be logic'd away.

Anyone who tells you that how you feel is wrong, is, themselves, wrong.

How you feel is how you're supposed to feel.

What you do with what you feel is what you're supposed to use logic for.

"I feel like nobody likes me" is a complete, coherent thought. It can be a rational reaction to an irrational feeling, or an irrational response to a rational worry. There are a lot of variables.

Logic and common sense is not "That's stupid/wrong" in this case.

It is to determine why you feel like that in the first place; "I feel like nobody likes me because I haven't seen anyone in a while. I haven't seen anyone in a while because school has been keeping me really busy," and reminding yourself that that is a reasonable reason to feel like nobody likes you, but that it turned out, after all, that that wasn't it, and you just haven't seen anyone in a while. 

Being insensitive is not being honest. It's just being rude.

An example of being insensitive is to tell someone they *should* feel x way because x reason. Now, a lot of you have been told that that's not insensitive, it's just the truth. It's not. It's just how you feel. Ohhhhhhh.

Here's WHY that's insensitive; No matter how logical it would be for them to stop feeling sad that their mom died because it won't bring her back, not only will it not make them stop feeling sad, but it will make them feel bad for being stupid as well. You might not know this- I certainly didn't when my abusive ex boyfriend did it to me. Onision, however, certainly does.

"Should" implies that something isn't how it's supposed to be, but that's a pointless word most of the time. Nine times out of ten when used in terms of emotion it's negative and it makes absolutely nothing better. Not only that, but if you're talking about the past tense, it already happened! What good is harping on the past going to do?

"You should be happy right now!" "I should never have..." "He shouldn't have..." 

If you find yourself using the word "should," you're probably imposing or presuming a little bit too much on yourself or someone else. So just stop a moment, think really hard about what you're about to say, and maybe ask a question about it instead. Here's an example. "You should be happy right now" > "Why aren't you happy right now?" It might change a lot about how you see those 'irrational' emotions. SO TO SUMMARIZE Emotion is "I am so depressed. I will never be happy again. Everything is the worst it has ever been and it will only get worse and never get better." Logic is "I know that this is because my brain chemistry is genetically predisposed to make me a black void of sadness sometimes. It's not going to get better right now, so I might as well get up and shower before I get bedsores and my cats starve to death. The smart thing to do is to tell someone about this before it gets out of hand."