#published 1987

It's about an intersex kid.

It's about a little girl born with a staff.

And that's Not Right.

The adults in the room- her father, the 'medical professional'- attempt to remove the staff, by blade and by fire. The fresh little baby SCREAMS. So they agree to pretend it doesn't exist. She'll probably grow up just a regular little girl.

right?

But just around the onset of puberty..... it becomes apparent, not to her, but to the adults, that she's not going to be Regular.

The medical professional tries again to rectify matters. She tries to destroy the staff while the girl is unconscious. The girl screams. The adults give in. They aren't monsters.... but life will be so much harder, so much less foreseen, for this strange little girl....

They try to raise her 'right'.

If she won't be a conventional woman... maybe an unconventional woman. A Powerful woman- in the way that women can be powerful. Are permitted to be powerful.

But she's not a woman- she's a child. What will she be, when she's grown? A Witch. A Wizard. She can't be either. She can't be neither.

(The term 'warlock' is repeatedly invoked and scoffed. The etymology of 'warlock' is 'breaker of oaths'. Counter to the covenant. Rulebreaker.)

Really enjoyed this! I like the idea of using time loops as a way to explore the human condition. …Which sounds cliche and a little melodramatic, but that really is what the book is doing, and it does it well. Seeing big emotional and philosophical themes explored from the biased and unreliable perspective of a character who’s not very in touch with himself emotionally and is less empathetic and wise than he thinks made for an interesting contrast. It made me wonder about Pamela, his love interest’s, interior life, which we only ever get fleeting glimpses of but seems to have much more depth than our narrator’s. The main character is just such a man, and it really shows in the choices he makes and the way he thinks throughout the loops.

The way Jeff, the main character, talks about women throughout the book seemed more like a male-author thing than a commentary-on-men-and-period-typical-sexism thing, and I found it pretty grating sometimes. Everything about the way Sharla was depicted, and the unchanging way young women are described no matter how old or philosophical Jeff starts to feel were especially gross and annoying.

I really enjoyed how the book explored the specific times in history it was set in. I liked feeling immersed in a culture I never lived through, and it was interesting to see a late 80’s (when the book was written) perspective on the 60’s, 70’s, and 80’s. The way the book talks about the 80’s feels laughable from a 2020’s perspective, so some of this book is unintentionally bleak.

I liked the ending and it suited the book well, but I still wish we got some answers. Specifically, SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS, I at least wanted to know who responded to their ad from Australia implying that they had to wait for the next replay to make contact. SPOILERS OVER! As a reader it was so frustrating that the characters seemed to just forget about that!