#pthc2016

Finally got to sorting all my stickers from the Philly Trans Health Conference!! I have SO many OMG✌🏻️#pthc2016 #trans #transgender #freestickers #stickers #phillytranshealthconference #aclu #glsen #hrc #transcafe #phillyaidsthrift

I forgot to up lap some photos from the #pthc2016 ! I got to finally meet @jake_graf5 and meet up with @gorillashrimp once again! #pthc2016 was one of the best times of my life and I can wait to return next!!! #ftm #ftmtransgender #ftmmagazine #transman #brotherlylove #philly #thisiswhattranslookslike #trans #transgenderpride

Thanks for the memories Philly, until next time. It was also the most amazing to meet all of you

Philly last year vs this year. #PTHC #pthc2016 @alionsfear @skylarkergil @uppercasechase @bee

What you should have grabbed at #pthc2016 #hopeafter20 #samfect #authorcashmere #krushpains

I'm already missing Philly so much. The energy and just plain badassery was life-changing to experience and be a part of. Especially @itscharlierose. His performance had me hype AF and so proud to be a trans man of color!! #philly #phillytranshealth2016 #phillytranshealthconference #pthc #pthc2016 #pthc16 #Philadelphia #ftm #trans #lucascharlierose #lgbt #philadelphiatranshealthconference #tpoc #qpoc #queer (at Philadelphia, Pennsylvania)

So I just go back from the Philadelphia trans health conference and its got me thinking a lot about white transness, but specifically white trans masculinity. I attended the conference because I wanted to meet a bunch of famous trans folx that I've grown up watching on YouTube and seeing on tumblr etc. I didn't really see much about the history of the conference, but tbh, I didn't really look into much either- that was my fault. Anyway I get there and there is an over powering presence of white trans men. It felt like a very trans masculine dominated space where everyone wore snap backs, fitted caps, septum rings, stretched ears, tank tops and "self made" or "trans voices matter" or ".5cc" t shirts. There was definitely a theme. Anyway, I attended a panel of all PoC trans women where they spoke more on the origins of the conference, their hard work that had gone into making the conference a reality and basically (like anything else that brings life and culture into this white binary bullshit of a queer community) let us know that PTHC was founded and kept up by black trans women and GNC folx. It was sad to hear that and see how much space these white trans men were taking up in the comin spaces at the conference, at the tables, vendor spaces etc. it was also embarrassing to identify the discomfort I was feeling. I spent the second day just kind of observing the white trans masculine folx. They all greeted eachother with a lot of "dude, bro etc. " a fist bump or confident hand shake and other strange white cis male adopted mannerisms behaviors etc. some of them went to a few workshops (where many PoC and trans women were presenting), but most, particularly the YouTube/tumblr famous trans masc. folx @uppercasechase (I don't know the other guys urls) ty turner, the @flavntstreetwear twins @seethestarsablaze and Aiden D. stayed in the common spaces (not even necessarily at their booths, but just walking around trying to get people to notice them. The conference became more of "how can I show off how hot I am and get the most looks because of how well I've achieved my masculinity" and less of "how can I support the trans feminine artists and organizers who made this space for you, do the work to keep it going, and hold the best interests of abolishing the Eurocentric bullshit binary that was brought into the world through colonization (yeah this is the same system that forced you into the situation you're at: having to 'come out' from the boxes this European whiteness made for you) This goes with also saying that all of these guys have been called out by myself and other folx for using appropriative language (mostly all AAVE- taken from black trans women), wearing appropriative jewelry, and promoting mostly only white trans masculine dudes. Oh also how was that one flavnt twin even allowed in the space with dreads? We all know how often she's been called out and still refuses to do anything about it. Keeping this also all in mind that these people were making the most money and profiting from the conference more than basically any of the PoC or trans feminine focused booths. White trans men hang out with, idolize, and BUY FROM other white trans men. The weekend was followed by many selfies of these YouTube famous white trans guys with the shirts off showing "what trans looks like" once again with a very white, very masculine, Fatphobic presentation. This was disappointing Anyway- as a white trans masculine person it was definitely a wake up call to how spaces get stolen and changed. My role in that. What things to look out for coming out in myself as far as: that ego trip and turning the movement into a fashion show to exploit trans bodies. With all of that anger being said. I'm having to work through a lot of these things for mysel because white trans masculinity in myself is inherently going to give me the tools to create that type of space (imperialism, misogyny, racism, colonialism, Fatphobia, ableism etc). It's really hard to realize my actions and deal with that accountablity and consequence. we are given tools to ignore accountability and get away with it. Point is. I think is white trans guys need to pick it up and celebrate the black trans women and GNC folx who allow us to exist by taking the revolution on from the front lines. We need to be careful to not take up space and be aware of the power we have been given and how to not exploit that.

I got to meet all of my idols at the Philly trans health conference this year. I can’t wait to go next year! @cha