#pseudochat

AND THEN LITERALLY DID A FALCON PUNCH RIGHT AFTER

this started out with an hc of “what would the first time be, between kaneki and touka, once he has his human hands back?!”

i loved the idea of touka entranced by the softness of kaneki’s hands and the “natural” warmth. when i first wrote a version of this hc it was something like “and she can’t get enough of him touching him —”

but when i wrote out the hc fully here, i had this feeling that the description of kaneki’s kagu hands (”the caress feels like a caress”) starts from a perspective like “i thought they might feel artificial...but they feel ‘right.’” in the end it didn’t really sit right with me to go from there to “getting touched by REAL HANDS feels so nice!!” it feels kinda,, ableist? not sure that that’s the right word in this case, but maybe you get it, that i didn’t want to privilege “the feeling of ~real hands~” in this tiny story which is primarily about just intimacy between two people. in this fic i hope it’s clear that his hands are different but each enjoyable in their own ways.

in the end i liked the idea of kaneki feeling some awe about it but touka deflecting in a funny way but still being fascinated by his body.

when i first wrote this, i also started with the thought that touka, when being first touched by FleshHands, was surprised at their warmth — but it was a lot funnier and maybe accurate that kaneki’s hands were cold instead lmao.

i also love looove kaneki teasing touka as he gets more comfortable with her. <3333333 

Rules: tag 9 ppl I might know on this site

Colors I’m currently wearing: gray....black;;

Last band shirt I bought: uhhmm...a Beyoncé shirt!

Last band I saw live: Beyoncé isn’t a band huh...? but i saw her last. oh, wait, maybe it was Corinne Bailey Rae...who also isn’t a band...;;

Last song I listened to: Wake Me Up, Aviicii

Lipstick or chapstick: chapstick//// i don’t really wear lip colors

Last movie I watched: hmm...isle of dogs

Last 3 TV shows I watched: omg. it was Nightmare Tenants and Slum Landlords. and The Big Ward. and Crazy Ex-Girlfriend. 😂💦💦💦💦

Last 3 characters I identified with: k...aneki ken......?? probably after that...yuuri...violet evergarden, a bit.

Book I’m currently reading:  Wizard of Earthsea and Steering the Craft by Ursula Le Guin~~ as well as The Economist’s Diet because i happened to spot it in the library...and yesterday i finished The Hate U Give 🤗