#proxvent

i know even in this high res week even if i underestimated some of the calories i've DEFINITELY been below my BMR. there is legitimately no physiological way i could be gaining. that's not how body thermodynamics work. i know that.

but i took the belt and wrapped it around my naked stomach as tight as it would go. the fat rolls were disgusting. my stomach is still full from the meal i had today. i didn't even eat all that was ordered. but i feel bloated and disgusting.

i'm not losing fast enough. part of me wants to do a 2 day fast tomorrow. part of me wants to just throw away the leftovers and pretend i ate them. P is asleep. he wouldn't know. but i would feel guilty either way.

i haven't binged or truly slipped up at all since i invoked mother earth to support and guide me on this journey. i've been eating consistently below my BMR, but it's still not enough. i compare the progress pics i took a week ago to now and barely see a difference. i wrap my fingers around my wrists and barely feel a difference. i know the belt showed me i lost quite a few inches for just a month of work but it's NOT ENOUGH.

i'm going to go into a true meditation state for this upcoming low res week. i know i technically have two more days of high res but it's already september 13. i need to lose a significant amount before the clothes shopping day and it's Not. Fast. Enough.

it's not dangerous if my mind and body are synced up and believe that it isn't. AND IT ISN'T!!!! fat people doing IF do three day fasts all the time without any problems. hell, i could even do a week of alternate day fasting where my eating days consist of only eating 1000c or less. i have my vitamins. i have my electrolyte supplements. my nutritional needs are taken care of, and my energy will come from my fat. IT SHOULD NOT BE THAT DIFFICULT TO LOSE ENOUGH IN TIME.

my issue is that i'm not moving enough. i am sleeping enough. i am not eating too much, quite the opposite. i am consistent. but i rarely have the energy to do anything other than lie around all day and wait until it's time to eat.

this changes TODAY.

10k steps at the very least. every single day. no exceptions. daily forest walk or compensatory nighttime block walking. 10k steps. every. single. day.

do 5k steps in the morning and 5k steps in the evening if you have to. half while fasted and half to burn off anything you ate that day.

if steps are too much, DAILY. FOREST WALK. once in the morning and once in the evening if you can. but at LEAST once a day. no exceptions.

you've done well sticking to a routine so far. the only things throwing a wrench in your routine are the people around you. YOU are in it for the long haul, i know you are.

10k steps a day. continue with alternating low res and high res weeks, but continue with daily forest walks even in low res. this is the only way you will lose enough by the end of the month.

for your fast from tonight to the end of tuesday, continue walking. take food out in some picnic basket and tell P you're having picnic days where you eat outside. throw it away or hide it when you come back in, but CONTINUE THE FOREST WALKS. if you feel faint (which isn't likely because your body will definitely be accustomed to the fat giving you energy; you've done this before, convince your body it can do it again), then you are allowed to get home asap and drink broth for electrolytes, but that's IT.

last two days of high res will be a fast with daily forest walks. then you'll be back on low res, also with the daily forest walks. keep. at. it.

you can still have significant progress by the end of the month. but once again,

only

if

you

are