#proceed accordingly

so i stress not eat and I'm underweight because eating is so unappealing and makes me nauseous. Even when i eat regular sized, three meals a day 2,000 calories seems like a really hard number to reach. i have the complete opposite problem to everyone else; theres only like three websites on how to gain weight healthily with the same wikipedia jargon reiterated and its just i feel really helpless. It's mostly a side effect of depression. I've just found out that its foods high in protein that are making me nauseous because I'm simply not used to it. Which makes me feel a little bit better, knowing. so now I've started taking an antidepressant thats supposed to make me hungry. and my mom is so anti- buying me protein shakes regularly and "why can't you just eat more?" and "now that you're on this new medicine you can stop drinking those shakes." I'm kind of obsessively concerned about how much I'm eating. i feel like i should be eating all day. i spend too much of the day just sitting in the kitchen. and its not helping that everything in my house in non fat and low in calories: slim inches off your waist! I don't feel i have the right to ask my mom to change some foods and to not always make high protein, ultra lean dinners. I'm worried this is starting to become unhealthy, because for the past few days eating is the only thing I've thinking about.

when i was a freshman in college the guy who lived next to me got half a cake for his half birthday in the mail from his mom and every year since then i've given my mom so much shit for always forgetting mine it's hilarious