#pretszel

𝐈𝐧 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐜𝐡 𝐝𝐚𝐳𝐚𝐢, 𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐨𝐫𝐭 𝐦𝐚𝐟𝐢𝐚, 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐬 𝐚 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐬𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫.

ᴄʜᴀʀ: ᴅᴀᴢᴀɪ, ᴋŌʏŌ

𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 𝟏.𝟓𝐤

ᴛᴡ: ᴀʙᴜꜱᴇ

Chapt.1 | Chapt.2 | Chapt 3 | Chapt 4 | . . .

Dazai had a sense of disappointment when he first saw you. Not necessarily a dislike towards you specifically, but towards mori.

He didn't have to ask mori how long he knew or if he found out recently, mori keeps things from him a lot and he has to set back the betrayal he feels. It hit twice as hard this time, considering he actually had family, but that family was kept from him until she was ready to be shaped into a weapon like he was.

So it was evident this wasn't new information.

He didn't want to bother asking you questions, not even about your ability, either. He doesn't even want to be a part of any training you'll go through, and doesn't want to have anything to do with you.

Yes, he's distancing himself. Emotions mixed between uncomfortable and irritated.He has a title he doesn't want to care about, but he has to uphold that title no matter what.

In other words; get over it.

Now, here the both of you are at a stand still.The silence was heavy, and neither of you looked away from echother, as if waiting for someone to say the first word or make the first move. Your bright eyes never leaving his dull ones, and the same could be said for him.

Although when he looked at you, he saw how the light reflected your eyes, creating a hue in them that made you sickeningly alive. An opposite reflection of him. He saw that flicker of determination, and it made him wonder when that determination will simmer into ash.

You could already tell you were wasting time, there was no point in dragging him here if neither of you were going to talk it out..So, your hands began to glow, and you walked up to him brfore he could pull away. Not that he needed to, but you didn't know his ability, either.

And the second your hand wrapped around his wrist, to enter his mind and erase what had just happened..your ability slipped into a vast void of nothing.

"What-?" You reeled back with a hitch in your breath, then snapped back up to him to see the expectant expression on his face.

"Why can't..what did you do?" You demanded, and the former boy just blinked before turning away.

"I nullified your ability." He simply stated, not an ounce of pride in his voice when he spoke about his power, as if it was a mere curse than a blessing.

You stood and stared at him, his indifference, and couldn't help but wonder why.

Why be so..cold to such an amazing ability? There's so much good he could do with that, so many people he could help.

A feeling of a burning sensation flared in you as the realization hit once more, but instead it felt like boiling water.

This is the mafia, and you're thinking of outside terms. Terms he probably hadn't even thought of or considered when he joined the mafia, you have to have lost your damn mind to join a mafia.

You must have been in your lowest state to have joined..it'd be easier..to mold someone when they're this broken. Taking their pieces and shaping them into something they weren't made to be.

You didn't feel sad, but on his behalf, you felt an anger he didn't have the time to feel, an anger he didn't have the right to have. Apparently.

And as he stood on the shadowed side of the room where the curtain hid the rays of the sun, you stood in the light, open to the burning blazes.

"What's it called?" Was all you could say.

"..no longer human."

"I..see." and the name seemed to hurt more.

"Don't give me any of that...bullshit anymore." You scoffed out, face twisted in a concoction of emotions, even ones that contradicted themselves.

It was jarring, to see someone sharing the same blood as him have the exact humanity he possessed nothing of.

"Whatever you wish." He shrugged, his voice laced with a sarcasm and laziness that showed little ounce of care.

After that, he just walked past you, figuring he's looked at you long enough that he's felt a feeling of disgust bubble inside him.

And you didn't stop him, everything needed to be said was said and gazes that told more than words were held. You felt like you were left with nothing after, though.

𑣲.

By this time, a week has passed, and you've barely seen him at all. Instead of dazai training you, kōyō took that initiative, although you made it clear you weren't going to be complacent with her.

"Such a shame." Kōyō's lips curled into a frown, looming over the girl on the floor who had multiple injuries from acting out of line.

"Whatever bullshit you spit is only that.." you coughed, clutching your side where you had been hit by her ability; golden demon, who loomed behind kōyō like a threat.

You could feel your anger spiking slowly as you stared at the tiled floor, the misery of the pain you felt tying in with your unnwavering anger.

Towards this place, towards these sycophants, towards the bitch in front of you.

"The light in your eyes makes me feel deeply saddened.." kōyō began, feeling a sense of pity for the poor girl in front of her, who she believed she could save from the torture of hope.

"I can help you, you just need to let me. I know it's difficult, but the sooner you get this over with, the easier it will be to see that you belong here." Kōyō smiled, a gentle, vile, smile, and gracefully crouched down to be eye level with you.

You slowly looked up to the woman, and didn't say a word, although your mind definitely had a lot to say.

"Nobody is coming for you." Kōyō sighed, raising a hand to put your hair behind your ear and cup your cheek. "You can bloom in darkness just like him." She 'assured.'

"..what?" You quietly spoke up, "i know nobody is coming for me..i only have myself." You cough again, moving a hand up to your mouth, while kōyō leaned back the tiniest bit, her eyes widening just the slightest as to show she had clearly underestimated your commitment.

"I see.." she hummed, removing her hand from your face, and raising it to slap you instead. "Foolish, disgusting." He scoffed, standing up and stepping back.

"You're related to dazai for a reason, i hope you know. You're just as hopeless as him, which is why you're here. You're here because this is built for you, and if i have to.." kōyō continued on, raising her hand to gesture to golden demon who took its stance beside her.

"I'll make sure to use force." She threatened, "you've been blossoming in the light long enough, petal." She chuckled, moving her hand to cover her twisted smile.

You slowly raised your hand to your face, feeling the burning sensation of the slap, and to be honest, it didn't affect you the way she wanted it to.

Before joining the mafia, you already lived in a hell hole of a home. You already had the thoughts and feelings of someone who had so much determination, but felt a twisted sense of satisfaction at being hurt, because it was something to get used to.

You liked pain. It was a sensation that made you so twistedly miserable, that it felt so close to home, and you enjoyed feeling like you deserved it for whatever reason.

You didn't believe you were a bad person, but it felt deserved, and it felt nice. You don't want to be miserable, but it felt..amazing. and you didn't know why.

Because of course you had to be the one here, sitting in a mafia, with a brother who's an executive, you had to be the one to be hurt this bad because you always were, and anything anybody did was hurt you, whether that was indirect or intentional.

It always had to be you.

So, as you sat there, you didn't cry and you didn't lash out. You just slowly turned your head to look at the red haired woman and snorted.

"I may as well go into your memories..and replay every single moment where you lost your hope, over and over until you beg me to stop. Until you feel the same misery i do." You smiled, not a single blink or stutter interrupting you as you happily watched the once confident kōyō slip into a look of horror.

"Because you seem real comfortable making me feel your misery." You sighed, eyes dropping to the floor once more. "I don't think it's quite fair."

Kōyō had realized two things at once.

One, you already had your trust and hope broken over and over, for you to threaten to do the same to her, that whatever hope you had was purely burning on an angry determination. You were running off of nothing but pure spite.

And two, she hadn't known what your ability was until now, assuming that maybe it'd be like dazai's or maybe you hadn't had one at all, if it was something important mori would've told her..

Or maybe he didn't tell her at all, because he knew that if kōyō made you act out like this, he'd get to see exactly what you were capable of doing to other people.

And at that realization, kōyō's blood ran cold.

' Would you actually..do that? '

Tags : @cinnamncornflakes