#premarin mare

To the Lovely Laydee Lucille La Don

5/6/89 - 3/21/17 

            I remember when I first saw you in 2007. You were in an email flier from the Animali Farm horse rescue. It was a photo of you nuzzling the neck of another horse and the paradox of your greatness and softness got my attention. You were eighteen years old and had completed your service as a Premarin mare and were up for adoption. There was a price tag around your neck from the meat buyer.

           In that moment I knew I wanted you. Not than I needed another horse, but something about you stayed with me and I waited anxiously for two weeks for you to arrive from Canada.

          When you finally arrived I noticed the trailer was too small for you and your tail had rubbed off. You looked bewildered and exhausted. The other horses immediately felt threatened by you, and it took a couple of years before they finally accepted you into their herd.

          I was surprised to find you so open hearted and loving considering your past. All the foals you bore, year after year, taken from you prematurely and sent off to the feedlot to be sold for meat. There was an underlying sadness in you but you displayed no defensive behavior. I only felt love from you Laydee.

         There was nothing complicated about you Laydee. You loved to be groomed and massaged. If I had a brush in my hand you followed me around until I had to take notice of you. How could I not? Your gentleness and beauty was intoxicating.

         You were the first horse the kids rode. The giant white horse who made the kids feel like they were in a real life fairy tale. When your legs were too tired to give rides I retired you from the kid’s program and you became an exceptional therapy horse. Your empathy and generosity of spirit touched the lives of many.

        I’ve witnessed you as the angel, the matriarch the light bearer and in your last constellation, less then two weeks ago, you represented death. What you showed me is that death is inevitable. It appears unmistakable like an illuminated shadow demanding respect.

       Laydee your consistency was re assuring, which I took for granted. It’s a day after you left and the space you leave behind is vast and empty. To say I miss you is an understatement.

       I’m glad you passed on you own terms and I was fortunate to be with you when you took your last breath. As we laid together on the ground I felt the moment your spirit left your body and followed the smoke trail from the sage. There was a palpable feeling of peacefulness as your spirit exploded to it’s full potential like the genie being released from the bottle.

Joann: years of suffering to a life of sanctuary

To say this being has had a rough life is a huge understatement and the scars both physical and psychological are still evident.  You see, Joann lived many lives before arriving at a sanctuary and another life since Farm Sanctuary took over her care.

When Farm Sanctuary arrived at what would become our Los Angeles-area location, many of the animals were not receiving the individual care they needed and Joann was one of those animals.  

Let’s start with her past.  Joann was rescued from an illegal horse-tripping rodeo, which is cruel event that involves the roping of the horse’s feet.  Her front right joint still shows those scars.

Before her days in the rodeo she was a Premarin mare; she has the tattoo from the farm where this part of her story took place.  Premarin mares are horses kept pregnant so their urine can be collected to create a drug called Premarin, used for the treatment of menopause. As such, Joann would have spent most of her 11-month pregnancy confined to a stall so small that she could not turn around or take more than one step in any direction. She would have worn a rubber urine-collection bags at all times. Once her foals were born, she would have been re-impregnated so the cycle could continue – often up to 12 years. After enduring that phase of her life, Joann was likely sent to auction where she was purchased and put into an illegal rodeo.

But the saddest part of her story is likely before that.  She was someone’s horse; someone’s companion. Someone somewhere in her life actually cared about her.  And her story is not unusual.

Kids go to college, families realized the high costs of care and boarding for horses and they are sold.  And where a horse goes after they are sold depends on the buyer.  In Joann’s case, life – no matter how good or bad it might have been –went from secure to hell likely in a matter of days. 

Years later, after Joann was rescued from the rodeo, she ended up at the facility that would become Farm Sanctuary’s Southern California Shelter.  It was here where the final chapter in this beautiful being’s life began.

When we arrived, Joann was terrified of humans (and rightly so), but unfortunately she also needed medical attention.  She had open wounds on her front legs that were covered with flies. She was also suffering with an enlarged front right joint, lameness, and overgrown hooves. 

We assumed that we could simply jump in and provide the care she needed.  But Joann had different feelings about this. She backed into us, kicked, and would run herself into fencing to get away when we entered her corral to attempt to treat her.  We sought advice from multiple horse vets who said she was not treatable and one finally suggested we bring in a horse gentler. And we found one who changed her life — and ours.

His name is Joel and within 30 minutes of meeting Joann he had a halter on her and was able to treat her many wounds.  And more importantly, he treated her psychological pain and helped her learn to trust us.  Four years later, Joel still visits weekly to work with Joann, who continues to improve.  She lets us treat her and groom her, and he has worked with our Acton caregivers to learn how to allow her to continue to trust. 

And now she has a new equine friend to help her continue to thrive.  Zoe came from a loving home and thankfully did not experience the horrors that Joann endured. Zoe trusts us, and like Joel, is helping us help Joann.

We are collectively blessed to have witnessed the physical and continued psychological healing of this amazing being, who through pain and suffering came out on the other side. 

Amy came on Sunday to our Horse Constellation event to have her constellation performed. Amy had never had a close encounter with a horse before! As you can see it didn't take long for her and Diva to make a connection.