#pre fall 15

My badge was freshly cast, still warm inside my bag when I showed up to the beach for my first day of work. I quickly realized that ‘special’ shouldn’t be put anywhere near my name, even if ‘detective’ came directly after it. There was nothing special about me, standing over the body of a young teen, slain, face half-submerged in the sand. The receding tide had left behind little shells around her naked body that glistened under the morning sun. Some appeared trapped in the netting of her blonde hair which tentacled away from her head towards the water. Of course something so beautiful—those golden strands—wanted to get as far away as possible from such an ugly scene. I could relate, though this was my job. I was studied in the scrutiny of detail, understood as someone who’d be capable of seeing past the crusted blood and scrapes across her pale skin, and that frightened stare. Before glazing over, I imagine her eyes appeared as deep as the ocean she now stretched still in front of.

Finally, you came. We’ve been waiting here for hours—watched ten other trains unload into the station before you got here. Be careful with my sister Elsa’s bag. Inside, she keeps the heads of the last Mommy and Daddy who came to pick us up. I’m kidding… kidding. We have to inject a bit of humor into this whole mess of a thing, honestly. As I’m sure you know, you guys aren’t the first, and given the degree of streets with houses we’ve called home and schools attended with their mottos engrained in our minds, you likely won’t be the last. You see—I’m Trudy by the way—we don’t exactly take to being cared for. We’re more the injured fox type, chased away by torment and taking shelter within the forest somewhere deep inside. We will remain this way even as you try and get to know us. It won’t be easy, but I promise you, you’ll try and try, always to no avail. This is who we are, and that pretty dolly and stuffed bear you’re holding won’t make us any different. Here, let me show you what I have inside of my bag: the cotton skin of a teddy and the melted corpse of Sally-Smiles-a-Lot.