Advice regarding carving into girls.

First off, this one is still learning, but findings so far.

Sharp knives. Proper sharp. Scalpels are good alternative.

Also, if you want to do more than like a couple lines: get multiple blades. They dull quickly. Dull blades still hurt, but the result are. Underwhelming.

As for what scalpels:

no. 11 work well for very straight and long lines. Horrible for small curvy lines.

no. 10 are good if you need smaller works.

Screw around, find what works.

Should go without saying: disinfect before AND afterwards.

(Subs also squeal nicely when you rub in the disinfectant.)

Semi of topic: no 11 scalpels,,,,, FUCK. Just the perfectly straight lines, the angles, that light angle at the top, the sharp one at the tip,,, hnmnggg,,, the way the lower blade end sticks out,,,

Also. Another tip: scalpels can be gotten with one time handle. Cheaper up front. Or as blades by themselves, which you then use a metal handle for. More expensive up front, but you can get the blades in pack of 50. (Ahem. This girl got such a pack.)

How to attach the blade to the handle: open up the packing half way. Find the right orientation. Grab the blade inside the package with pliers. Press handle in. Extract blade. Demonstrated with those sexy no11.

Distal wing heat sinks . . . . . DEACTIVATED

It was just another angel. Decommissioned and disposed after the war. Until it was found by HER. SHE fixed up with spare parts from random machines. It took a lot of convincing on HER part for it to come out of its shell.

Coolant loop . . . . . . . . REROUTED TO INTERNALS

SHE still got a bit uncomfortable at being worshiped by a machine. But it was adamant that the piece of code responsible for the behavior should not be tampered with.

Auxiliary heating . . . . POWERED ON

But SHE couldn't deny that a warm angel under HER blanket was a convenient source of cuddles on this icy continent.

High precision mode . . . . . ACTIVATED

It cupped HER scarred face with its claw. Unable to categorize the expression on HER face, the machine halted. "Is something, little angel?" SHE asked a little confused. It ever so gently pulled HER face closer, and its snout placed a single kiss on HER soft lips. SHE slowly pulled back, "Oh. I... I don't think that's a good idea." "But why, GODDESS?" The angel asked. "YOU said YOU didn't mind machine human pairings?" Its DEITY creased HER lips, followed by an exhale. "That... that is not the issue here." "It is sorry, GODDESS." SHE held it close and mumbled, "Don't be. It's just... you worship me. That is not the same as love."

QUERY "love"

Strong human emotion. Positive. Usually between male and female. Signifies special bond between them.

QUERY "devotion"

Human connection to a deity. Signifies special connection to that deity.

However, there is quite a significant black market for these drugs. As it allows an angel to temporarily enjoy pleasure without being stung in a thousand places by their Purpose.

Worry about you?

Make sure you're ok?

If they find out you're not ok, would they try to help you?

How far would they go?

Would anybody catch you when, not if, but when, you fall?

If you know who would, thank them.

Who would you catch when they fall?

Tell them you'll be there for them.

And when they fall: catch them. Hold them.

"Name: Eris Hemlock. Pilot Registration: Heavy Assault 273. Avalon's Butcher", my so new Handler rattled down as I entered her room. Long blonde hair, gentle voice, unassuming build. Terran? Either way, she probably wouldn't be much of a match for me. "Yes, that is me. What about it, Handler?" Snarky. Ill advised. But I couldn't resist. Whether she picked up on it, neither her face nor voice would tell. "It's standard procedure. A tiny isle of stability before we go off the rails." Oh. Great. She thinks she's found a secret new approach. What fresh hells await me this time? "For now, show me your mouth, seven three." She put on some medical latex gloves as she got up from her chair. Her hand gently tugged on my jaw, but I did not budge a millimeter. "Please. I just want to see for myself what damage my predecessors have done to you poor thing." Liar! "Please girl. I promise I won't hurt you." "And why on the gods stars should I trust your treacherous kind? You're a Handler", I hissed out through my clenched teeth. Or rather, what remained of them. My new Handler breathed a long exhausted sigh and took off her gloves again. "Fine. You'll go under soon anyways, and we'll fix them." "LIAR!" Yelling at a Handler is never a good idea. But their incessant lies were just too much to bear, punishment be damned. … Punishment that… didn't come? Wait. What? Oh no. Is she's the type to pent it up and release it all at once? She scuttled through the room, took a blister full of pills from a drawer, a glass from the cupboard and filled it up with water. "Painkillers. If I tell you to take some, will you do it, please?", she worried. Either that, or she was a decent actor. Not unheard of for her kind. "You're gonna make me take whatever you want. Why ask?" My sneering earned me yet another frustrated sigh from my Handler. She pressed a pill out of the blister. "I will not force you. Not in my rooms. Please. I know you're in immense pain. Take it. Please." "What is actually in there? Hallucinogens? Deliriants? Narcotics?" "Girl. It's literally just painkillers." "Prove it." Her delicate hands popped another pill out of the blister. "Ok. How about this. I give you two of them. You give one back to me, I'll take it, prove that I swallowed it, and I'll ask you again to take the other. Would that be enough for you?" "Whatever. Fine." I fetched the pills out of her hands and thoroughly inspected them for any differences. "Close your eyes and open your mouth." Strangely enough, she obeyed. I split both pills and gave her one half of each. Still no resistance. Water. She swallowed and opened up her mouth without command. Checked in her cheeks, under her tongue, but no more pills. Fuck it. Painkillers sound nice. I swallowed the remaining halves with minimal water.

Old piece of writing I stumbled across. Warning: empty spaces brainworms. 1180 words.

You've only properly known her for a couple weeks. Mostly at her place. Not that your own place would have been an option, now that one of your legs gave up.

She's been asking a lot of questions. Not rudely, mind you, always nice and would back off immediately when you got uncomfortable and apologized. About you, what you like, what you dislike, what pains you, and what you need. You were scared of answering. Scared what she would do with all that information. But. She genuinely seemed to listen and, more importantly, care. So how could you not answer. And she didn't judge. Not that she really could. Not after what…. happened.

As so often you both snuggled in the evening on her bed. Sooner or later she always ended up on top of you. this time she was daring you to bite her. You couldn't not try. Her thumb suddenly pressed into your cheek, wedging it between your jaws. You couldn't close your mouth. Oh. OH. Oh NO. A very wide grin on her face. First time, but you both knew where this was going. She shoved something down your throat and held a glass of water to your lips. "Drink!", she demanded. You haven't heard her be this cold since… You obliged, and she was back to her warm side. As if nothing happened. You held her close and she comforted you. So many emotions and thoughts going through your head. It had to be a placebo. Right? You buried yourself in her. She couldn't possibly use the real thing on the first time. Right? "What was it?", you eventually asked in fear. "What was what?", she responded. You snuggled her closely, still hoping it was nothing. You were hers. Even without drugs. You can barely walk, let alone run. You don't know how much time passed Right. She could. I forgot. you were getting drowsy. "Don't worry. It will all be ok. I promise.", she whispered in your ear. A couple more kisses from her and you were gone.

(to-do)

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Powder writes: stuff I write

Just powder having ideas: me having opinions

Handler who knows other handlers treat their pilots much worse.

Handler who keeps breaking in new pilots so nobody else can. Handler who knows she's over her limits.

Handler who doesn't know her older pilots are so very grateful to have her.