I'm afraid to move on with my life because then I won't have my old life. It's weird. Instead of my future feeling like it's still the same life that I've had, it feels as if it's detached. I'm so terrified to leave my only home that I've known (even though I think I need to) because then when and if I come back, it will never be the same. My childhood/adolescence will have officially died. No going back no matter how hard I try. It's so weird how your new experiences paint the world around you so differently each time. I suppose I'm afraid to go on with everything because I've never gotten closure of  my childhood being over in a healthy way ever since my dad left.