#pleome.pdf

Retris couldn’t be clearer here.

Pleome wants some soft, picturesque ideal of a relationship where he’s the gardener in control of something beautiful. The maintenance of a rose bush to keep it alive but in captivity is notoriously difficult. Endless pruning to make it pretty and manageable and acceptable to the HOA and Instagram photos, but unnatural and unrecognizable to what would genuinely survive in the wild. Roses themselves are grossly impermanent but the symbol of a perfect romance. Retris is gripping the thorns, the only aspect of the rose that is permanent and stable no matter where or how it’s being kept, the part you shave off when you’ve severed a rose to present to a loved one. It’s substantial, but it’s ugly, and it can hurt you if you lack respect for it and the nature of the rose stem.

It’s too difficult for a gardener to handle, though. They wear gloves for a reason.

This direct communication of Retris’s wants and needs is met with hostility. Immediately after Pleome spends a fraction of a second doubting himself,

He cancels out the idea that he could be in the wrong and starts gaslighting Retris outright.

He keeps crossing lines and teetering on the edge of a realization that he’s in the wrong but immediately shuts the thought down to address the consequences of his actions as the problem, not the actual root. Again, the roses - he’s concerned with appearances, not substance.

This turns into open dehumanization. Retris isn’t a person, he’s one of Pleome’s pet projects. He’s a broken computer that needs to be fixed. He’s something to be retrofitted to suit Pleome’s needs. The image of a rose bush is at least pretty. There’s nothing beautiful about cracking open a computer and ripping its guts out to figure out what the hell is wrong with it. That’s not a struggle that can be glorified.

Pleome’s idea of ugly and substantial conflicts directly with Retris’s. To grip the thorns is to request to be left unchanged and respected. It’s wild, and it can hurt sometimes, but that’s only if you forget to treat it with care. Pleome would rather perform a symbolic lobotomy than take Retris as he is.

Entirely Correct Assumption!! Unfortunately, I'm not much of a Coffee Person, so I've only ever really had one drink from Starbucks. I'd give him one if I could, but I may just have to leave that one up to Headcanon. 👀

orry for the tmi i just needed you to understand the context

Hi, this is up there on the list of funniest anons I've ever received, and I'm obsessed with it. I sent it to the Developer Server for a group consensus, and we've reached some verdicts.

Pardus is the most likely to canonically play Pikmin Bloom, as she is already canonically deeply invested in the Pikmin franchise. She's located in a major city, lives by the Dandori way, and is really into parkour, so her activity levels on that game would be insane. He is so fucking efficient.

Ajax and Pleome play Pikmin Bloom for Pardus reasons.

If Retris were to play it, his Friend Code would get leaked on the Internet somehow, and he'd get a bajillion fucking friend requests in an hour because everyone wants to know his exact location. He cannot rest from hell.