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An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Pitch's life was finally going well. He had a beautiful woman at his side, a new home, a new lease on life and, best of all, the Guardians are leaving him alone to live his life. But when Pitch starts being haunted by strange dreams and a shadowy being, he's determined to put an end to it. However, upon finding the source of this problem, his new peaceful life might be turned completely on it's head...
“London, sector 3, bottom left second molar! Sydney, sector 5, top first incisor!”
The sun was slowly descending on the Tooth Palace, indicating the end of a perfect day. The fading light sparkled against the tiles of pillars hanging high in the mountaintops, the colours reflecting off, creating tiny light rainbows all over the walls. The gold decorations sparkling and giving off a warm glow. Tiny, iridescent fairies were busy at work as always, flitting with either tiny tooth treasures or shiny coins. Thousands flew in and out of the every busy palace, the hustle and bustle never ending.
In the middle of it all was the Mother herself; the Tooth Fairy. She darted here and there from each fairy, giving commands, gushing over specific teeth or silently scolding certain children for not brushing properly. However, her eyes were bright and alert; feeling completely in her element as new memories flowed into her Kingdom and were safely stored in sparkling cylindrical cases. Toothania couldn’t be more at peace.
A soft yawn escaped her lips as she rubbed her eyes, not realizing how weary she was from such a long day. Baby Tooth instantly noticed her Mother’s sudden fatigue, and zipped up to her right away, chirping like a bird in her ear. Tooth giggled to herself.
“Baby Tooth, I’m honestly ok. I don’t need to rest.” she smiled sweetly to her companion, but the little fairy was having none of it. She gave her a glare as she angrily chirped again, using her tiny hands to try and push Tooth away. As if that would do anything. Tooth openly laughed.
“Alright! Alright!” Tooth snickered, turning towards the tiny fairy, “I’ll just have a quick nap. You’re in charge while I’m gone. And make sure the daytime workers switch with the nighttime ones! If I’m having a break, I want to make sure everyone else gets one too.”
Baby Tooth gave a small salute, making Toothania beam at her little prodigy.
“What would I do without you?” Tooth smiled, kissing one of her fingers and lightly tapping Baby Tooth’s feathered head. Baby Tooth chittered happily, nuzzling into her finger for a moment before zooming off, determined to make her Mother proud. Tooth sighed happily and fluttered up into the palace towards her room, feeling absolutely high on life and love for her little baby fairies.
Her mind was in a daze as she entered her room, joy filling her heart, but drowsiness clouding her eyes. It was no wonder she had a near heart attack when she realized she was not alone in the room.
“I must say Toothiana, these are really the most luxurious pillows I have ever laid on. You must tell me where you got them.”
Tooth’s tired body instantly snapped awake as she turned to her bed, seeing a long, dark figure casually sprawled on her mattress, surrounded by cushy pillows and blankets. Pitch Black had made himself at home as he admired the patterns on the pillows, not seeming to care at how shell-shocked Tooth was.
“Persian? Very nice; though I shouldn’t be surprised. You always did seem to like this style, just like your mother-!”
Pitch didn’t even get a chance to finish as Tooth suddenly bolted towards him, screaming a warrior cry as she raised a clenched fist. Pitch practically fell off the bed, getting tangled in the sheets as he narrowly escaped a swing from the fairy. He quickly ducked and dodged each of her blows as she advanced towards him, a yelp of fright occasionally escaping his lips.
“Tooth! Toothania stop this! Too-! Moon above! Would you- Ach! Would you stop this?!”
Feeling his blood begin to boil, he quickly grabbed onto Tooth’s wrists and pushed her backwards until she was on the bed, him pinning her down beneath him. Tooth struggled and squirmed beneath him, grunting and angrily crying out. Pitch rolled his eyes as a wave of black sand shimmered over her mouth, silencing her growls. She continued to squirm, trying to escape his clutches, making him all the more irritated.
“For Moon’s sake Tooth! Will you just stop for a moment and listen to me??”
The look of shock and angered bewilderment on Tooth’s face was almost priceless, but given the certain circumstances, this was no time to laugh. Pitch could tell Tooth had something to say, so he hesitantly commanded the sand away, allowing her to speak.
“And why on Earth would I ever listen to you??” she roared, causing even Pitch to flinch ever so slightly, “After everything you’ve done to me?? My fairies?! What more could you want Pitch?!?”
Pitch’s grip on her wrists tightened, feeling his anger begin to grow. But he knew very bloody well that she spoke nothing but the truth. Eventually, his grip on her weakened ever so slightly. He sighed heavily, finally looking her in the eyes again. Tooth was shocked to see such a serious look on his face.
“…. I need your help. Please.”
Now Tooth knew for sure something was seriously wrong. Pitch never said please. Ever. She momentarily lost herself in his eyes as they looked so solemnly into hers. She never realized how fascinating his eyes were: golden rimmed with a cool gray, almost like a solar eclipse. She had never seen eyes so intriguing. She quickly shook her head, focusing back to the matter on hand.
“You can’t be serious. Why in Manny’s name would I ever help you? I should tie you up right now and throw you to my fairies. They would be more than happy to have their revenge on you.”
A smirk slowly grew on Pitch’s face as his eyelids lowered.
“Hmmm. Yes. You would like to see me tied up now, wouldn’t you~?”
Tooth’s face suddenly erupted in heat, her cheeks turning bright red against her pale skin. Suddenly realizing the position she was in, she felt her face grow even hotter and all the more embarrassed. She began to squirm again under his clutches, not noticing the smile of amusement growing on Pitch’s face.
“Toothania! You’re so flushed! My my, are you thinking naughty thoughts?”
Tooth’s heart kept into her throat at those words as she struggled more. She looked up angrily at the shadowed man, trying to keep her composure but finding it rather difficult.
“Get off of me.”
“Hmmmm. No, I think not. This is far too amusing to pass up.” Pitch was practically giddy as he leaned in closer, making her even more shy. Her eyes flashed with anger.
“Pitch-!”
“Fine, fine, I’ll get up.” Pitch finally drawled, making Tooth breath a sigh of relief. But Pitch’s grip tightened, his face suddenly growing very serious once again. “But only if you promise to help me.”
Tooth groaned in irritation. How could she possibly help him? What could he possibly want from her? She continued to struggle, but she found herself trapped underneath him. It seemed she didn’t have much choice. She gave him a sideways glance, still not trusting him.
“If this effects the children in any way, or harms anyone I love-!”
“No. Nothing like that. I promise no harm will come to you, or your precious fairies or Guardians, or, heaven forbid, the children.” Pitch almost gagged on that last point, but made sure to keep his composure.
“Once this is over, I’ll leave you alone. I promise…. I would cross my heart or even go as low as to pinky swear if it made you feel any better, but, as you can see…” His eyes flickered to his hands holding onto Tooth’s wrists, then back to her eyes, “My hands are a little full at the moment.”
Tooth gave him a long, hard stare. She had gotten very good at being able to tell whether someone was lying or not. Children often lied about whether they had brushed or flossed their teeth, and after centuries of being occasionally lied to, as innocent of a lie it was, she had gotten rather good at revealing the truth from someone. Pitch was still staring at her, the smallest of playful smirks on his face. But as she continued her glare, his smile slowly fell, and a look of pain replaced it.
“Tooth…” he almost whispered, making Tooth’s eyes widen in surprise, “… You’re the only one who can help me… Please.”
The sorrow in his eyes baffled Tooth completely. She had never expected to actually feel… sorry for Pitch. Whatever this request was; it certainly meant a lot to him, more than his lifelong goal of creating a new Dark Age. Something personal. And she knew, without a doubt, he was not lying.
After a long hard stare, Tooth finally gave a sigh of defeat and nodded her head. Pitch seemed surprised she said yes, because a look shock and hope suddenly filled his face; a look Tooth wasn’t used to seeing on the dark man. Pitch, realizing he was showing his emotions, quickly shook his head and grunted in irritation, finally removing himself from the feathered female. Tooth immediately jumped to her feet, feeling relieved from finally being freed and out of that embarrassing situation. After quickly composing herself and smoothing down her feathers, she turned to the Boogeyman.
“Alright Pitch,” she stated, “What is it you so desperately need help with?”
Pitch slipped a hand into his dark robe, making Tooth realize there was a hidden pocket in his clothing. Curiosity was getting the better of her. When he pulled it out, he opened his hand and looked at it, and a tiny, fond smile spread on his face. Finally looking at Tooth once again, an amused smirk rose.
“I believe you might remember this little souvenir.”
Laying in the palm of his hand was a white, pearly molar. Of all the things Tooth was expecting, it certainly wasn’t this.
“That morning… on the lake…” She whispered, remembering that fateful battle years ago. When she had decked him right on the jaw before he disappeared in the night. The tooth that she knocked out of him…
She snorted.
Pitch looked on unamusingly as she tried to cover her laughter. She couldn’t help but snicker a little bit; it was one of her most fulfilling memories. She had never been so satisfied. And the look on his face was just the icing on the cake.
“Alright yes yes, laugh it up.” Pitch sighed, “Please, do continue to laugh at one of the most humiliating moments of my life. It doesn’t hurt me at all, I swear.”
Tooth’s giggles simmered down as she wiped an eye, clearing her throat as she collected herself. Finally taking a breath, she fluttered closer to him to look at the tooth in more detail.
It was his bottom, second molar to the left, and Tooth was surprised to see how clean it was. Not a cavity or chip in sight. Not only that, but it seemed polished; as if it was a rare jewel. No dust nor dirt to be seen. It seemed like Pitch had taken good care of it. Tooth wondered how many night’s he spent studying the molar, keeping it close to him almost like a sacred treasure.
… But why?
“You’re probably wondering why I still have this,” Pitch began, jolting Tooth out of her deep thoughts. After a solemn pause, the dark man continued.
“… I wasn’t joking when I said Frost and I had a lot in common. Being all alone, not being believed in by anyone… and not knowing who we used to be.” Tooth found her heart sinking as the spirit spoke, guilt seeping into her bones. She thought about Jack, about how tortured the poor boy was and how awful she felt for him after hearing his story. She never fully realized that, in another life, Pitch was just like him; young, alone, confused, and afraid.
“… I don’t remember the man I used to be… Whether I had a life before this or not, if maybe I was a better man than I am now… I have no idea where my baby teeth have gone; probably turned to dust at this point.” Pitch paused, looking down at the little bone in his hand, “But this… This could be the key to something. A memory locked away in my mind that can only be opened with your help.”
Pitch looked up at Toothania once again, and she had to catch her breath at the look on his face. So full of sorrow, yet the spark of hope that shone in his eyes made her stop breathing for a moment.
“I don’t know whether this will work or not… but if there’s a chance, I want to know. Toothiana… Help me to remember who I used to be.”
A shiver ran down Tooth’s feathered body as the dark figure; the man she had fought for centuries and hated all her life, was basically pleading on his knees for her help. It was such a strange situation to be in. Her mind was screaming for her to refuse; to yell and scream and hurt him, especially after everything he had done to her. She should be furious.
And yet…
Her kind, giving heart. A heart that would leap at the chance to help someone remember precious memories. A heart so motherly, loving, and protective over anyone who seems to be suffering. A heart that, no matter what, would do anything for the sake of others… even if they had wronged her.
Silence hung in the air as the two figures stood still, each looking at the little pearl in Pitch’s palm. Finally, Tooth reached out and gently took the molar, inspecting it more up close before finally looking at Pitch. He straightened up and looked at her, determination in his eyes.
“… Are you ready?” she spoke. Sometimes seeing the memories tied to a tooth wasn’t always easy. Most were good, some not so much. She had to make sure he was prepared for whatever the outcome.
Without even a second thought, Pitch gave a quick nod of his head, as if he had rehearsed it. It seemed like he had preparing for this moment for a long time, and Tooth knew that he was going to go through with it. That being said, she reached out her free hand and slipped it into Pitch’s long, cold palm. Too busy concentrating on the task ahead, she didn’t notice the startled look on Pitch’s face or the embarrassed grunt as he averted his now slightly flushed face. She closed her eyes and relaxed her body, focusing all of her energy on the tooth and Pitch’s hand.
“Let your mind relax,” Toothania breathed, bringing the loose molar up to Pitch’s forehead and pressing the tiny bone up to his head, “Try to think back on the past, as far as you can remember. Delve deep into you subconscious, let memories of the past flow forward.”
A blinding light started to shimmer from the tooth, growing brighter and brighter with each passing second. In a moment, all was white around them, and Pitch found himself scrunching his eyes closed tight against the intense light. Finally adjusting to the new brightness, the Boogeyman slowly opened his eyes and gasped softly as colourful images played before him. Tooth, still holding his hand and holding the tooth to his head, looked around the white abyss as well, watching reels of Pitch’s past float around them, like little bubbles floating by on a summer’s breeze.
A royal family of Lunar people. Pitch smiling in a general’s outfit covered with shining medallions. A woman with long, dark hair and a kind smile. A little girl with that same smile and Pitch’s eyes. Darkling’s surrounding them both, but the little girl barely escaping. Pitch trying to save them, but then being surrounded and consumed by the darkness…
… A little girl, alone and crying on a shooting star.
Tooth watched each memory come and go, amazed by such a story. It was like nothing she had ever seen. She knew Pitch spoke of having a dark past, but this? This was much worse than what she could have ever expected. No wonder he was the way he was…
Pitch could hardly breath as these memories flashed before him, like tiny pieces of a puzzle slowly fitting together into a tragic backstory. He felt his lungs squeeze in on himself as he remembered, tears falling freely as he remembered everything that had happened. He couldn’t breathe, it was like he was drowning, deeper and deeper into the blue. He thought he was ready for whatever may come his way. But not this.
“S-Stop it.” He barely whispered, making Tooth quickly turn back to him, “P-please… make it stop.”
Tooth didn’t need to be told twice. In an instant, she removed the molar from Pitch’s forehead, making the white room and memories softly melt and fade away, eventually leaving the pair back in Tooth’s bedroom. A heavy silence hung in the air, both too afraid to even move or speak.
Finally, Pitch felt his legs give out beneath him as he fell to his knees, the tears never seeming to stop from pouring down his face. He made no sounds, no cries or moans of anguish. He simply knelt there, the tears flowing like a never-ending waterfall. Tooth stood looking over him a moment, still shocked at what she saw, and not sure what to even say to him.
“I… I had a family.”
It was barely a whisper, but as soon as she heard those words, Tooth immediately stooped down to his level, safely placing a reassuring hand on Pitch’s shoulder. He flinched at the contact at first, but relaxed under her warm hand. He didn’t look at her; he simply stared ahead; his mind clearly in another world. She kept his eyes locked on him.
“I… was a warrior hero… I…. I had a wife and-!” Pitch’s voice broke, “My beautiful daughter…”
This was too much, even for Tooth. She knew what it was like to lose someone special. Her own parents were taken from her far too quickly. She knew exactly what Pitch was feeling. Boogeyman or not, she knew what she had to do. She did to him what she had needed all those years ago when she found out of her parent’s passing.
She leaned forward and brought Pitch into a hug.
Pitch’s lean body was extremely stiff against her own soft curves; he clearly wasn’t use to this kind of affection, which made Tooth’s heart break even more. But finally, the man’s long back finally curled up unto her, loosening with each passing second. He never lifted his own hands to reciprocate the hug, but he pressed his head against her shoulder, leaning against her so much she was afraid she would topple over. She felt her heart rate quicken as he melted into her touch, but she immediately pushed it away, trying to soothe the pained creature before her.
Minutes passed between the two until finally, Pitch lifted himself until his back was straight again. His eyes were still damp, and slightly red, but he seemed to have calmed a little as he finally looked at Toothania straight in the eye. His eye’s were still like a solar solstice, but Tooth could have sworn the gold hidden between the grey was slightly brighter; more coloured.
“My daughter…” Pitch finally breathed, “My sweet Emily Jane… She’s still alive…” A broken, single laugh escaped his mouth, which he quickly covered with his hand, but the smallest of smiles still remained on his lips. Tooth gave a sympathetic smile and nodded, trying to encourage the shadowed man. The two sat in silence again as both thought to themselves, reflecting on the night and its events.
Finally, Pitch rose to his feet, making Tooth look up curiously at him and his sudden change of behaviour. Mere minutes ago he looked like the most broken man she had ever seen. But now. Now there was a glimmer in his eye, his mouth set in a determined line as he took a deep breath and stood tall.
“I have to find her. I have to know what happened to her.”
He continued to look forward for a moment before looking down at Tooth. The sudden head swivel made Tooth jump ever so slightly, but she looked up at him awestruck. Suddenly, a small, peaceful smile grew on Pitch’s face as he offered her his hand. Her fluttery heart once again leapt into her chest as she accepted his assistance, placing her tiny bird hand into his own strong one. In one fowl swoop, he gently helped lift her to her feet, both eyes locked on each other.
“Tooth, I-!” Pitch hesitated for a moment, “I never thought I had a real purpose in this world. But you just helped me realize that there’s still something out there for me. That I’m…” not completely alone? “That I’m still around for a reason… And it’s all thanks to you.” Pitch’s free now rested on top of Tooth’s hand, now sandwiched between both of his grey ones. Tooth’s eyes flickered from his hands to his face, feeling some heat beginning to warm her cheeks.
“… Thank you, Toothiana, Queen of Flight. You have my deepest gratitude.”
And with that, the shadowed man sunk to the floor, a mass of black sand shifting and swerving along the floor, up the wall, and flying out into the setting sun, leaving Tooth completely alone, as if it had never even happened.
Tooth stood, dumbfound, trying to wrap her head around everything that had happened. As her mind finally processed everything, the smallest of smiles crept up her face, her eyelids finally relaxing and drawing heavy. What an eventful night it had been; so many different emotions skirting here and there. From anger to peace to sorrow to hopeful. At least it had a somewhat happy ending. Or at least, Tooth thought so.
She still couldn’t believe Pitch had such a past. She still despised everything that he had done to her friends and fairies, but now… not everything seemed so black and white. Some of it was beginning to meld into different shades of grey; just like the shadowed man himself. Maybe he wasn’t so black and white. Maybe he was just a shade of grey himself; maybe Tooth needed to look him over once again before finally deciding who he truly was. An enemy? A loving father? A good man?
A small smile crept up her mouth as she shook her head. She was too tired to think of this any further. She was tired even before all of this craziness had happened; now she was utterly exhausted. Finally beat from such a day, she fluttered to her bed and flopped on her many pillows, sighing happily as she snuggled into the comfort of her sacred haven. She couldn’t help but giggle tiredly to herself as she felt her eyelids grow heavy.
They really were the most luxurious pillows ever.
HELLO HI I’M SORRY THIS IS LATE BUT @heypapergirl SURPRISE I’M YOUR SANTA BEOTCH
I hope this is what you were looking for!! I had so much fun with this prompt ^^ Sorry its long? I got carried away?? And sorry if there’s any spelling errors, didn’t have time to edit ;A;
Anyways, I hope you enjoy!! Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!! :D
@rotgsecretsanta
Pitch is a very unhappy soul, and he's been unhappy for a very, very long time. He hides it well, but sometimes, it becomes too much for him to bear. He's tried again and again to end it, but always in vain. He cuts, bloodies, and drowns himself, but the efforts prove worthless in the end. Death has been his enemy from the very beginning, and she would rather die herself than give him the satisfaction of eternal rest. And so centuries have gone by. Every so often he'll try again, nursing some twisted hope that maybe this time Death will show him mercy, but it is never so. He'll hold it together for a time, but eventually the cracks begin to show. Under the stress the widen, until he breaks. Only this time, someone will be there to pick up the pieces
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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on FFnet and AO3 I have estimated: - there's about 25 people that have written at least 1 cavity shipping fanfic - Less than 10, closer to 5 really, have written more than 1 cavity fanfic. - there's, as of this post, only 23 stories on AO3 with cavity in it - less than that on FFnet. Conclusion - this is the smallest ship fandom I have ever been in and I love you all.
author's note: a 'fill' I did for a prompt on the rotg kinkmeme that I felt like sharing. Prompt essentially asked for Pitch/someone based off the song Daylight by Marron 5. ~*~ It was never truly quiet at Punjam Hyloo. There were too many tiny fairies returning with teeth or flying off with coins for silence. However Tooth's bedroom was located far enough above the unending hustle of working fairies that unless you concentrated, the world seemed at peace. For all intents and purposes Tooth was dead to the world, for once getting the sleep her body desperately needed after their night of carnal pleasure. Pitch felt rather smug about exhausting her into deep sleep (it was a rare feat given how much power from belief coursed through her veins). Any other night Pitch would be passed out beside, just as exhausted by the night's activities. Except Pitch couldn't sleep, or rather, he won't. Sleep would only speed up the inevitable and Pitch did not want this night to end for as long as possible. It was their last night together even if Thiana did not yet know that. Pitch wanted to take the time he had left memorizing her every feature, burning every good memory into his brain so he would never forget. Memories of her smile and her laugh (both so rarely carefree in his presence) were like precious diamonds to him. A smile twisted his lips as he recalled the way Tooth's entire body portrays her emotion, (her plumage adorably puffing out whenever she was surprised or excited). His one arm curled slightly tighter around Thiana's waist as his free hand traced her sleeping face. Pitch's touch was light and gentle, careful not to shock Tooth awake, and yet still she stirred slightly, murmuring nonsense at his movements. I love you. For how long now did Pitch harbor such feelings for Thiana? For how long now did he dare not speak them? He wanted to for so, so long but knowing only rejection awaited stilled his tongue. Pitch was Tooth's dirty little secret and admitting their affair meant more to him than Tooth knew would surely end things. Probably out of some attempt to 'spare' his feelings. As if the love he felt was so weak, so transient that rejection would be a balm and not an open bleeding wound. Part of him wished he had at least said those three simple words tonight. Tonight was their last night. Tomorrow he was ending all they had anyways, one more nail in the coffin could not hurt. Except it would be cruel. With what Pitch was planning, saying such words would be more an attack than a confession. He did not want to end things this way. He had tried for centuries, from that first horrible day he realized Toothiana meant something to him, to avoid this end. For so long he allowed his affection for Tooth to cage him, to domesticate and subdue him in a way the Man in the Moon never dreamed to accomplish. And for what? Tooth cared naught for him except the pleasure he gave. He had tried, so many times that he had lost count, to please her beyond the bedroom. Pitch tried to express interest in her fairies and her collection of teeth; she only eyed him suspiciously and guarded them closely for years. Pitch tried to interest her in his own work but she shied away from any knowledge of him. As if knowing him beyond his body would cross some moral line. Even idle conversation she denied him. It broke him. He loved her so much he was willing to change, to be whatever she desired, and Thiana could care less. Once he dreamed of the other Guardians discovering their affair, chuckling at just the picture of their shocked faces. Now he dreaded such a situation, knew that if forced to choose Tooth would not pick him. She must know something was wrong now. He worshipped her body tonight, did his best to make the most of their final night. Pitch peppered her body with kisses that confessed his love, regrets, and farewells. He only stopped when her body could take no more. If Toothiana did not at least suspect something was amiss after tonight then she was in for quite the surprise tomorrow. There was a good chance he was going to kill her. He did not want to but she, like Sanderson, were the back bone of the Guardians. He could not defeat the other three without first defeating her. And he could not hope to succeed in his plans without first taking out the Guardians. He was anathema to them, well most of them, his very existence a blight upon all they stood for (more than once Pitch wondered what motivated Tooth into starting and maintaining their secret coupling). Dawn was arriving too soon. Already its twilight was coloring the sky orange, red, and violet. Pitch was starting to burn, skin the color of ash melting into shadow. With great reluctance he slipped away from Tooth. His movement and the growing light caused Tooth to wake if sleepily. "Pitch?" she questioned sounding so confused (Would she sound like that tomorrow?). "Shhh," Pitch soothed quickly. "Go back to sleep Fairy Queen. It is not quite dawn yet." I am just leaving. went unsaid like so many other things. "M'kay," Tooth agreed with a sleepy sigh. She shifted slightly to accommodate for his absence and quickly slumbered once more. Her simple dismissal felt like a final confirmation. There was nothing for him here. Pitch took one final look at Thiana. The pre-dawn light made her resplendent. Her feathers all seemed to shine and glow with the growing light. A small smile pulled at her lips as her dainty hands rested across the space he once occupied. Will she miss him? Probably not. At least, not with what misfortune he has planned for her. He's tempted to give her one last kiss but he leaves instead. He had a world to engulf in darkness and fear, there was no time for unrequited love. Later, when his lair was filled with caged fairies and and mounds of teeth puzzle boxes, Pitch tried to remember those good memories he tried so hard to sear into his brain. All he saw was violet eyes wide in shock and betrayal. ~*~ end note: Also, because I am just that much of a vindictive and petty person. Challenge accepted (and hopefully met): post link