#pick-apart

Again, there are bits of this that ...don’t quite land for me, but going through the structure here:

(~4:30)

Bow: “If my helmet were that adorable, I’d leave it on, too.”

Catra: “It is not!” [comedic struggle to remove helmet ensues]

(~5:40)

Bow and Glimmer: [spinning a visibly uncomfortable Catra around between them]“Catra’s first mission! Catra’s first mission!”

(~10:15 ET)

Bow: “The angrier you get, the cuter you are!”

Catra: [lunges at Bow]

Throughout the first 1/3rds of the episode, we have Glimmer and Bow engaging in “good-natured teasing” that visibly upsets Catra - which only means they escalate it until Catra has a go at Bow.

This is, frankly, kinda shitty behaviour from Glimmer and Bow. It’s them violating boundaries Catra has implicitly set (“I’m not cute!”, discomfort with touch) because to them the boundaries seem silly and arbitrary. Haha, look how funny it is that Catra gets upset over being called cute, let’s do it again!

That said, given the structure of the episode, I am going to be generous and assume the intended read is:

Bow and Glimmer really are being good-natured, and are attempting to bond

They are misreading Catra’s behaviour as playful ‘mock anger’/minor irritation, because Catra deflects (with sarcasm, avoidance, arguing), rather than acknowledging and addressing her emotions.

This failure to meaningfully manage her internal experience leads to Catra becoming increasingly agitated, and eventually responding to minor provocations by lashing out.

(Structurally this is a difficult needle to thread, because you want the severity of Catra’s upset to be obvious to the audience, while believably hiding it from the other characters. Which is why it doesn’t quite land for me - Catra’s just not doing an objectively good job of masking her anger/discomfort here, so Bow and Glimmer ignoring it feels more callous/malicious than they likely intended.)

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Now, a PSA about anger:

Anger is not Abuse

Anger is an emotion. Abuse is a [pattern of] harmful behaviour. They are not the same thing.

Anger is a real, valid, normal, healthy emotion, just like all the other emotions. There is nothing wrong with getting angry or being angry, and experiencing anger does not make you a bad person. I’m intentionally not qualifying this - you get to be angry over trivial, irrational, unreasonable things! There’s no moral threshold you have to cross before you’re allowed to feel your feelings.

What you don’t get to do is blame your feelings for the actions you decide to take. Your feelings are an internal experience. They are not an alien force that controls your behaviour.

=================

(~16:00)

Bow: “It’s just so cute!”

Catra: “It’s not cute!”

Melog: [turns red, spiky and aggressive]

Bringing this back to the children’s cartoon: Melog’s dramatization of Catra’s feelings isn’t there to make the BFS go “Golly gee, I didn’t realize Catra was so upset”. An outside observer should be able to tell that, without needing an animate mood ring.

No, the person who needs visual feedback on Catra’s emotional state is Catra. Who struggles to recognize her own emotions, because she spent a lifetime being told (overtly and covertly) that her “negative” feelings were invalid and unreal, and that she should just stop having them (leading to cycles of deflection/repression followed by destructive lashing out). 

(~16:10)

Catra: “I’m sorry, I got angry. It’s something I’m working on.”

Adora: “Oooh, you are?”

Catra: [irritated] “Yes. Now can you please--” [deep breath] [brittle cheerfulness] “Yes, I am. I think this thing responds to emotions.” [normal tone of voice] “So, can you not give me a hard time right now?”

The “therapy” function Melog fulfills isn’t “teaching Catra to not be angry” - no one uses that brittle tone if they’re not fuming - it’s “Helping Catra recognize and acknowledge when she is angry, so that she can manage her internal experience in a healthy way, rather than an impulsive and destructive one.”

By recognizing that she is angry - and that her anger is real and valid, even if it is over something “silly” like teasing - Catra can then manage her feelings and the situation constructively (apologize for initially lashing out; own her emotions; deep breath to re-center herself; unambiguously establish her needs and boundaries).

Again, can’t stress this enough - Catra gets to keep feeling all her feelings. She gets to be angry, including at people she loves (Because the people we love can be infuriating). She gets to be sad and anxious and frightened and frustrated. The change is is how she deals with having those feelings. That she is finding ways to manage her feelings that don’t involve hurting other people to make herself feel better.

Adora: “No. Sorry, sorry. Do your thing.”

(For her part here, Adora accepts Catra’s assessment of her own emotional needs, rather than either demanding she stop having needs or insisting her needs are for Adora to determine. which is another check mark on the “Adora has mysteriously resolved her bullshit, despite continuing to have less self-knowledge than your average rock.”* list.

Sailor Eris, huh? Let's see how you do!

Civillian Name: Aurelia Eris

Pretty first name... But don't you think her last name kind of gives away who she is...???