"We're Not Cops."
--ROOKIE MOVES BY PEU_A_PEU

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"We're Not Cops."
--ROOKIE MOVES BY PEU_A_PEU

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Rookie Moves by peu_a_peu [E, 75k]
“He was absorbed in his little object permanence experiments when something incandescent and impossibly large exploded toward him.
At first Harry thought the door had flown open and admitted the moon. But he could see through the gargantuan shape to the still-shut door; it was translucent and shimmering with magic. The bright mass resolved before him as he backed away from it.
It was over a meter across, scaled, spiky, pinning him with eyes as big as quaffles: a dragon’s head, attached to a long neck that went right through the door. A life-sized dragon, he realized, composed of silvery light, so enormous that only the head was in the room with him.
There could be no confusion on whose this was.
“I knew a Patronus would work!” Harry exclaimed. “Jesus, it’s huge!”
“You’ll say that again before the day’s out,” came Malfoy’s voice from the dragon’s enormous maw.”
“You can hear me?” Harry asked, half-expecting Malfoy’s blond head to pop out from between the rows of glossy fangs. “How are you doing that?”
“I’m excellent at charms, nitwit!”
“And yet this one eluded you for the longest time,” Harry said, smiling giddily as the full implication sank in. “You must have an exceptionally powerful, exceptionally happy new memory to fuel it.”
The dragon’s great face betrayed nothing. “I don’t think we’re at all far apart, I’ve still got the tail in here with me. I’ll pull it back and you follow.”
The dragon began to shrink back; Harry dived through it, receiving a dose of minty invigoration, and pulled open the door so he could keep it in view as it slithered backward down the corridor, losing size. He pulled open another door, maddeningly identical, as the now-hubcap-sized dragon’s head phased through it, and caught a last puff of smoke as its snout slipped back into Malfoy’s wand.
“Hello again,” Harry said, spreading his arms wide. “It’s me, your wellspring of happiness.”
Carey ‘W’ Recs Wednesday presents (੭˙꒳˙)੭⁾⁾*✭: Rookie Moves
by
peu_a_peu
Chapters: 10/10 Fandom: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter Characters: Harry Potter, Draco Malfoy, Ron Weasley, Hermione Granger, Gawain Robards, Andromeda Black Tonks, Teddy Lupin, Original Characters, Theodore Nott Additional Tags: Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Auror Harry Potter, Auror Draco Malfoy, Auror Partners, dumb cop and dumb cop - they're dumb cops, Post-Canon, Humor, Romantic Comedy, Enemies to Lovers, Slow Burn, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Case Fic, Magical Artifacts, Paris (City), Draco Malfoy Speaks French, Cigarettes, Alcohol, Canon-Typical Violence, Incompetence Porn Series: Part 1 of Twenty-Two Cards
Summary:
Aurors Potter and Malfoy crack the case.
(੭ˊ͈ ꒵ˋ͈)੭*⁺˚. * ・ 。゚☆
Excerpt:
No one can help me. Malfoy, years ago, at the crisis point of his life. Face twisted up. No you can’t. No one can.
In the past, Harry had been accused of having a saving people thing. He was suddenly in possession of a dense little nugget of certainty. It recalled, of all farflung things, the Philosopher’s Stone dropping into his pocket. What a bizarre and wonderful life Harry had. He was about to make it more bizarre and more wonderful.
He barely stopped himself from laughing aloud in delight, and he did grin. “What else am I gonna do, break in a new partner? I’ve nearly got this one working.”
It was Malfoy’s turn to choke out a laugh. Then he frowned and looked at his feet. If Malfoy were a fellow Gryffindor he would have ended the impasse between them then, Harry thought. But he wasn’t brave like that. He needed Harry’s help.
Something within Harry ignited powerfully. Unsuppressable from this point.
“What about law and order?” Malfoy sneered, going defensively cold. “You don’t care about the assignment?”
“Malfoy,” Harry said. “I don’t care about the assignment more than I care about you.”
Malfoy stared at him.
Harry took a step forward. “I’m gonna kiss you now. Okay?”
Just to be annoying, Malfoy beat him to it.
Harry had meant for it to be sweet and reassuring. Brief, a promise for later. But Malfoy’s mouth was lush and hot, avid against Harry’s, opening for him like he wanted Harry’s tongue. Harry gave it to him and he made a wild little noise. After a few seconds it was already not brief, and from there it just kept on. No end in sight. Malfoy’s hands found Harry’s shirt and bunched in it.
Harry would have to keep kissing him until he ran out of breath. They would stand here until French people started to boo them. They would snog until twelve hours were up and the Clock chimed: forget something, dummies?
“We have to—” Harry tried, sabotaging himself by putting his hand on the small of Malfoy’s back. “Malfoy, we have to—”
“I know, we have to have sex,” Malfoy said, and licked Harry’s mouth. “We have to do it right now.”
“No…that’s…not…” Harry said, overwhelmed. Malfoy sucked at his jaw and somehow now had a hand up his shirt. They were in the middle of a pedestrian throughway. It was, as recently confirmed, three-thirty in the afternoon.
“Yes it is,” Malfoy said, arguing the point even though Harry hadn’t even successfully articulated one.
With effort, Harry pulled away enough to look at him and speak. That was a bad idea. Harry did not need to see Malfoy’s kissed-red mouth, the blond eyelashes that swept down as Malfoy’s huge-pupiled eyes looked from Harry’s eyes to his mouth, then still lower as he tried to subtly check if Harry had an erection. It wasn’t subtle, and yes Harry did, and Malfoy did also. Harry closed his eyes so as not to look at any of this because he actually had an important point to make. “Not until we deal with the Clock! We’re under a deadline!”
“So what? Haven’t you ever left your work to the last minute? What’s two or three hours?”
“Two or three hours?”
“What, you’re not up to it?”
“Malfoy, you could die,” Harry insisted. “It has to wait until after.”
“I could die anyway,” Malfoy said. “And then won’t you feel stupid you didn’t indulge yourself?”
Indulge yourself made Harry feel very overstimulated. He shook his head to clear it, backed away, went back around to the window to retrieve the pointless Extendable Ear.
“Let me touch your dick at least,” Malfoy said, following him.
“No! We’re in public!”
“Just for a second,” Malfoy said, crowding in so his body blocked Harry’s from public view. “I need to. For morale. I could die.”
He was only being obnoxious, but it was true that minutes ago he’d been ashen and tongue-tied with fear and stress, and now, well. Vim hardly covered it.
“Over the trousers only,” Harry said, and Malfoy’s open palm immediately pressed against him, fingers discovering the contours. Harry exhaled shakily.
“Feels kinda big,” Malfoy said, smirking. “For a guy your height.”
“My height is average,” Harry said, although he was undeniably glaring upward at Malfoy’s face when they stood so close together. “And it is kinda big.”
“You can touch me back. Aren’t you curious?” Malfoy breathed, tilting his mouth toward Harry’s, daring Harry not to kiss him.
Harry kept his hands by his sides. “No.” Over Malfoy’s shoulder he caught the eye of a Parisian passerby, whose judgmental frown told him that the nature of what was going on was eminently clear.
“Liar,” Malfoy said, his hand’s slow and lingering movements approaching handjob territory. “Such a bad liar. I can always tell.”
“I don’t start something unless I plan to finish it. When I’m done with you, everybody in our hotel will know my name.”
“Is that a promise?” Malfoy’s mouth, which he cruelly refused to close, widened into a condescending smile. “Potter, I’m gonna fuck you so hard your dead parents feel it.”
He squeezed. Harry’s eyelids fluttered but stayed open.
“Now are you gonna keep humping my hand until you cream yourself in the middle of the street or can we get to work?”
“Ingrate,” Harry muttered. He turned to face the wall and rearranged himself so his dick was trapped behind his belt.
✧(σ๑˃̶̀ꇴ˂̶́)σ❥✧¸.•*¨*✧♡✧*¨*•.❥
Crack This Thing Wide Open by peu_a_peu
I'm so incredibly delighted to have found this.
https://archiveofourown.org/works/46376056?view_full_work=true
This is why I love fanfiction
It is so warm and so kind, so clever and so astute, so laugh-out-loud funny and so fabulously witty!
Draco's underhanded characterization is brilliantly written, so, so crafty - with such an shrewd eye for all the small things - the little gestures, the pointed pauses, the meaningful glances.
I've never delighted in a "Draco meets the Weasleys for the first time" moment more than in this one - and I adore this trope if done well. This is the best I've ever read.
And best of all:
The deep lore peu_a_peu spun up after the (brilliant) chapter "The Knight of Lies" is the BESTEST and DEEPEST lore! It made my heart sing.
YES, Draco writing a psychoanalytic essay in his forties, followed by a slew of lay-friendly textbooks, I literally couldn’t ask for more. This made me incredibly happy. I feel deeply seen ;-).
I love this fic with all my heart!