Personal Consecration: That Which you Seek is Seeking You
Consecration (n): the act of consecrating (v) - to make or declare sacred
Some religions tell you from the beginning you are Holy, Divinity is within. Some religions tell you from the beginning you are not Holy, but there is a God who may still love you, under certain conditions.
I grew up with the second belief. I found my Truth with the first.
I’m writing a book. It’s about my personal consecration. About finding the Holy within. About (re)connecting back to that which was veiled from me. I want to use the title: Consecration: Finding the Holy Within, just like that, but I realize it has too many religious connotations and many people will never get past the title to understand it’s not about religion at all. It is about Holiness though. It’s about devotion to self - this Holy Being; about living in awe and appreciation of Nature and Life - this Holy Existence. It’s about being able to witness myself in states of confusion, sadness and frustration - and still know the Holiness that holds it all.
In researching consecration, I’ve learned there are 3 steps involved: Purification, Stimulation/Activation, Connection. I feel so connected to this process in a personal way. These steps have happened linearly at times and at other times simultaneously. And it is a process...believe me. Instant gratification be damned.
Purification down to the core of my being. Not because I’m bad, or dirty or wrong, but because I am full of much disillusion, pollution and basic crap beliefs due to growing up in a world in which we are completely (& purposely) disconnected from our inherent intelligence and wisdom, and addicted to external resources for our happiness. It’s not my fault, it’s not my parent’s fault, it’s not society’s fault...it just is. As a dear friend used to tell me, “It may not be your fault but it is your problem.” And a problem it is. I’ve always felt that I was wearing layers and layers of unnecessary emotions, words, experiences, other people, etc. It took me a while to figure out how to begin to dispose of it. I didn’t know what it would lead to, but I knew there was something underneath it all.
Stimulation/Activation -reawakening the core energy that lies within us. It can never be taken away, although it can feel like it. It is merely buried, deeply, sometimes very deeply. I could start to feel sparks of it early on in my journey. The sparks would quickly be moderated...one shouldn’t mess with fire...but internal fire cannot be put out. And the more air I gave it, the stronger it grew. Reading, different practices of yoga, physical stimulation, singing, anything creative seemed to stoke it. Liaising with like-minded others and with others who were well out of my realm of understanding...all stimulated this energy within me. I spent lots of time trying to “figure it out”, what is it? I bought lots of props, went to lots of workshops because at times it felt like it was “that” which activated this energy. And then I started to realize I could activate it on my own...without props, classes, teachers. I believe I needed all of these at first, to get me on the path, and then I didn’t need them any more.
Connection...understanding how intimately personal this energy is. How there is no one on earth that knows “me” more than this energy. That it is completely up to me in how devoted I am to it. At a certain point, no one can take me further than I can take me on my own. This doesn’t mean I never use props, read books or listen to guides and teachers anymore...I do. But never as a substitute for my direct connection. These are all tools for me to use as reflections for that which I already know. It is not separate from me...the flame and it’s heat, although can be talked about separately, cannot actually be separate.
Consecration complete.
“That which you seek is seeking you.” ~Rumi
