#personal2

Honestly 1 of the big reasons im scared to go on hormones is bc im so short (4"9) an SO much pressure is put on guys to be tall and i feel like ill still b invalid if i go on T and im just this 4"9 toe lookin boy......, i hate when ppl bring up my height or joke about it, theres not a moment that im not self conscious about being short. Sometimes i look in the mirror @ work (where i feel most valid) and feel good and that i actually pass and am respected, but then i realize how short i am and it ruins everything?? Dont reply to this with "wear platforms" bc boy thats all i wear

When i was at the bar the other night i was with my friend and his husband and they introduced me to some guy that works w/ nightlife here and he was on a first date with a guy and the guy was asking which one would be the "daddy" and i was kind of drunk off of gin n tonic and i just kept staring at him straight in the eyes saying that im the daddy and there was a nirvana cover band playing in the background and its the only thing i remember also the guy from 30rock/ broad city was talking to me bc my friend is friends w him and i just remember yelling in hebrew at him lmao ??

All i do is think about how better off id be living in nyc and ever since i went there its been haunting me more and more every day i dont even think about what job id get after school i just think about making looks for myself and what would look good in nightclubs. It makes me so anxious i feel so trapped in boston i just wanna follow my gut and go to nyc and i KNOW i would be so much happier there and i have sooo many connections that tell me like every day how much i belong there and how much i could put into the scene:( people kept telling me i looked like i belonged there and wouldnt have even guessed that i was here in fucking boston UGHHHHHH