#personal spread

So the top card is the yes or no, upright is yes reversed is no. And the bottom two are the reasons why. And Jesus this deck is ruthless! I love it. I definitely need to bond with it more.

So no it won’t go well, I’ll be filled with anguish because I’m setting unrealistic expectations of this health journey. So the way I see it the cards are telling me that I need to set more realistic goals if I want to have a good health journey. (Bats=swords, Imps=Wands).

This is a personal spread, so there are the positions of each cards. The meaning of each position is revealed alongside the analysis for each of them. You can use it freely if you want. It can be used to see how things actually are in your life, for a weekly, monthly or even yearly reading. Just have the decency to not say you made it yourself. I may modify it and add some components, I am still testing it. You can modify as you please and share it with me if you want.

...................[9]........[17]........[16]..............

.................[5][6].................[14][12].............

.............[3]|c↕️|..........[1].........|c↕️|[10]...........

.................[7][8].................[15][13]...........

...................[4].........[2].........[11]..............

Analysis

Key words: Challenges, adversity, pain, actions, confrontation, choices, decisions, blindness, deception, delusions.

1- Core: Three of Blades

This month we will be visited by the Three of Blades energies, which means lingering pains, suffering and a whole lot of difficulties. It won't be an easy month, that's what it is telling. Either this month will bring new heart aching challenges or past heartaches will come back brutally. To deepen its signification as a core energy, lets proceed to overview life's spheres more thoroughly.

2- Past Energies/ Foundations: Ten of Coins

As an informative note, in this tarot deck, the Ten of Coins upright means the usual Reversed meaning. Therefore this card implies the past energies, likely from September, and foundation of the Core are related to a loss or lack of inheritance, especially concerning family* matters and material aspects. An ill fate has been met by the past and brought you or closed one down, in a bad and vulnerable state. Either it is chasing you this month still, in the form of a mental concern that brings you torments and pain, or it is the foundation of a pain to come. So, take the time to identify this cause to prevent the downfall to take you by surprise and to leave you in a death state.

*Remember "family" means who you consider your family, and not just blood related, despite bearing the classical meaning of blood related individual matters.

3- Relationships overall energies: R. 002. The High Priestess

Concerning relationships at it sums, it indicates a lack of inner guidance and guidance in general, and also a lack of spiritual life. It suggests that there is a disconnection between the self and others, especially a spiritual kind of connection. It can manifest as merging so intensely with others that you lose yourself and sight of your needs or you want so much to be seen as apart that the connectivity between you and other is weak to non existent. It could also be that you are so lost, without faith of your own that you lost your way to connect with others and the world as a whole.

The pain could be the cause of this disconnection, therefore as a recommendation it strongly incline to reconnect with the self and establish proper boundaries within the self and others. Relationships are important and a major support to the inner life. No one should be left in the dark when hard times are taking place. Don't be swept off of reality, reach others if you need it, and know when to offer yourself if it is a significant other reaching out to you, but put the rightful limits you need. Also, spiritual life is an essential sphere of human beings. It is where our hopes lie. It speaks of a connection and faith in a greater whole. It doesn’t mean a god, it could be an energy or a concept, but the lack of it causes you a disconnection with this whole and the world around you.

To deepen yet again this aspect of your life, let investigate four major kind of relationships that affect your life.

4- The relationships foundations: R. 021. The Awakened World

By foundations, I mean the reason why relationships are going this way this month. So, this reason is stagnation, a never ending cycle that asks to be completed. It indicates that if it goes the way it goes for each are due to stagnation and failures.

So, it would be important to assess for this month what makes some of your relationships go stagnant, cyclic, without progression when progression may be needed. Also, I suggest to identify which relationships stop you from growing as a person as it could also mean that.

If you look toward the actual cards we got, work, friendship and romantic relationships seem all to be affected by this foundation. Look forward to each descriptions as I tried to elaborate these especially.

Relationships are an important part of humans as a living being, because we need each other to grow stronger and better. Therefore, a relationship that brings you down or imprison you into a never ending cycle do not fill its purpose. Thus, it has no purpose to last. Sometimes, we end up into toxic relationships because we believe we have a certain need when it is not really one or because we expect the other to fulfill this need because we failed to give it to us, and they superficially succeeded to give it to us... And tons of other reasons. However, truth, in reality, and the fact is, it is not the case, or else you wouldn't be suffering and/or you would grow, and by growth I mean change for the better. Something that doesn't seem to change is a sign it is rotting, dying slowly, but it is invisible to a blind eye... (Refer to the Self Section, I am not using this word for nothing there ;) ).

Be honest with yourself this month, it will be time to clean.

5- Work: R. 008. Discipline

Doubts, lack of confidence and trust, impatience, weariness, weakness... Those are impregnating work's sphere this month. It bounces back to the previous card a lot, to the idea of lacking inner guidance and simply not listening to the inner voice. Therefore, your work environment may be one of the major issue affecting your disconnection within your relationships. Keep an eye on that. 

So, in relationship to you, it means trust issues can come up and bring some challenges into your work environment and with colleague, probably due to a disconnection with the self, and also due to other painful circumstances. 

It can either be superiors or other colleagues lacking trust into you, or lacking patience, or becoming overbearing toward you. It could also be simply discipline, as the card’s name specify, that is lacking into your work environment, be it the workplace itself or yourself. 

However, the foundations indicate at work it may be stagnating because you don't put the effort needed to obtain success, or your work environment is affected in a way you have no control over, thus the lack of progression, but which you can partially counter by overcoming the downside of the 008. Discipline.

However, in any case, it means that you must take control over what you can have control over and be disciplined to overcome adversity and problems such as failures concerning your work or specific individuals in your working environment. Listening to your inner voice and deepen your spiritual world would be the first step to earn the upright aspect of 008. Discipline card and therefore counter the R. The Awakened world, that also suggests you just need a it more effort to succeed. Having a spiritual goal for work should be a must to anyone, so I strongly suggest to ask yourself what higher purpose you aim for and see how it could be applied into your work environment.

6- Family: Page of Cups

Fortunately, this card bears a more positive meaning. It indicates that through the month, within those bonds, you can find emotional receptivity, care and connectivity, which is said to be a lacking component in your relationships this month. Therefore, those relationships may play a crucial role to overcome the possible pain you are to experiment.

It might suggests to look forward a younger individual than you (younger sibling), or just to watch over you if you happen to be this younger sibling, with great care and sensitivity. They may help you center and guide you to your inner voice. 

This card also portends good news, therefore if the Ten of Coins really concerned family matters, those news may be about this situation coming for the better. Or it could just be awaited news or simply good news concerning family relationships coming through this month. 

This sphere is unlikely as affected as the other by stagnation and failure, and probably where you will be able to find some positive development. Or if it was affected badly, through the month, you may see a pleasant and heart warming closure to this or those impasses.

7- Friendships: R. Eight of Coins

Don't be fooled by this card either, alike the Ten of Coins from this deck, it bears its upright meanings when reversed. Therefore, it speaks of crafting your friendships. Thus, they will require of your time if you wish to be enlightened with spiritual connection. It bounces back again to the R. High Priestess which suggested a lack of depth and also R. The Awakened World which suggested stagnation or even failure.

Therefore, it fully implies through work, minutiae and dedication you will meet results. Thus, it is unlikely to be irrecoverable, but only if you put the rightful attention it asks. The R. Eight of Coins strongly suggests the need to work on carefully and with great minutiae to attain "spiritual success" and thus, some depth and growth, in this case, within your friendships. It will be a hard for everyone, so you will need to make extra efforts to maintain the depth and benefices of your bonds.

So, this month asks for a lot of time needed and to be invested toward friendships. Either to form new ones but with deeper meaning or to reinforce your bonds, and healthier ones. 

If the pain you encounter concerns one of your friends, then this card suggests it will ask thorough craftsmanship in order to bring a deeper mutual aspect to your relationship following what you may potentially go through. It is feasible, but you will need to take accountability of your responsibilities and they will need to do as much, if you want both to move forward (think of R. The Awakened World warning).

8- Love life: R. Two of Blades

This card speaks of indecision, turmoil, mental anguish and anxiety. So, this card speaks of anxiety, of choices that can't be taken due to fear, but also seeing things clearly after a period of blindness. It could be very simple and many minor problems that just accumulated over time or it could be more major and the cause of the pain to come. 

Also, the love life seems to be the most affected by the foundation (R. The Awakened World). It is saying you may have hit a more stagnant phase. And the R. Two of Blades suggests you see the truth but you, your partner or both are paralyzed by fear of it and what it implies. You need to speak your mind even if it risks to create conflict. As whether you say it or not, if something troubles you, it will affect the relationship even if you keep it silent, and you risk to create and meet a blockage in your relationship. For most, it is probably not irreparable, if you take the decisions it asks too, even if painful. 

This harsh decision concerning your relationship, or that will affect your relationship harshly, could be simple. It could be one moving in another country for X amount of time due to a work opportunity, cancelling planned vacancy together, etc., or to choose between two choices like Family or your partner, friends over your lover, both of you needing to sacrifice a choice over another for your relationship, etc. Those choices are in either case scaring to make, due to the pain it will cause in either case. But be honest with yourselves and each other. It could also be harsher than that or even more simpler but still painful to you, your partner or both of you. Don't think it is necessarily the worst, that's what is important to understand.

As for those who had hard times since a while, the foundation point out that if you have put this much effort and the results are minimal to invisible and/or unsatisfying to one or both of you, it may be time to end this cycle through the hard way. Thus the anxiety inducing decision it points toward to.

It doesn't mean break ups... But I prefer to warn any person involved in a committed relationship that wasn't going particularly well since a decent amount of time: this month is the Three of Blades. If it wasn't going well and you were avoiding the truth about your relationship, this month will hit you hard. But remember that pain leads to growth. Trust your inner voice, don't avoid it. It can't be for the worst on the longer term even if the "worst" from the present happens.

For the single ones, it may speaks of your issues to engage potential partners or a crush due to fear (of rejection). It could also speaks of a difficulty to commit into a relationship because of fear and overthinking how it will come out on the long run. Or again, it could simply imply you will be overthinking about love and get anxious about the future of your love life. Also, the foundation points you are probably alimenting bad habits or patterns thus the endless cycle of loneliness, anxieties and/or (fear of) failures.

In any case, first see the reason that produces anxiety concerning your love life, don't be afraid of the truth, it is to lead for the better despite how difficult it may be to face. Then, listen to your inner voice. What do you truly need? Do you feel ready for a relationship? What do you fear? What can you do to overcome your fear?

Remember the R. High Priestess here, as this sphere of your relationships may be strongly affected by this lack of concerns of your inner voice.

9- Relationship outcome: R. 015. The Dragon

This can mean two things. Either any issues will be overcome, and even you will be freed of any toxic relationships you were involved in, resulting in spiritual enlightenment. Or you will be prisoner of the weight you carry within some or all of your relationships. This all depends on you and the choices and decision you make.

This card in reversed can mean as much freedom or imprisonment. Seen all the cards given previously, you can see where the issues remain or will likely be encountered and face the adversity you will be confronted with. The Dragon, or known as the Devil, is a card of choice, but a choice that was (or still is) perceived as an obligation. Therefore your perception matters on how you will handle what is to come. Will you choose to own your responsibilities or will you see yourself as the victim of a persecutor? This card is a reminder that you are the one with the power to choose of your own end, and thus that you can free yourself from the suffering that was, is or will be encountered. Therefore this outcome is yet to be revealed by your actions and decisions during this month. Keep that in a corner of your mind.

10- The Self overall energies: 019. The Eclipse

For us, as an individual, without regards to any outer influence, the overall energies indicate very positive ones. It is great energies for you despite everything announced until now. It means that every challenge met this month will have a very positive impact. It also suggests to keep a positive attitude during the month and to not let yourself be defeated. Joy and great contentment awaits you despite all those unflattering cards. 

Also, any lies or deception will be unveiled. So, if you try deceiving yourself, this card tells you truth will avail and for the better of you. It would be futile effort to continue lying to yourself. However, as the following cards to come, it may be realistic to consider this aspect of this card because it was indeed an underlying problem...

11- The Self Foundations: R. Nine of Coins

This card foretells deception, due to insecurity and instability within the self. It is a foundation on which the self was or is lying this month. Seen the overwhelming cards we met, it is not surprising the great turmoil it creates influence you to isolate yourself in white lies. 

You may find yourself clinging to some people (watch out every relationships sphere, especially the outcome (R.015. The Dragon) that is strongly linked to dependencies) because of insecurities and seeking security in other by consequences, thus impairing your development as an independent and autonomous self. This card upright values independence and autonomy, so reversed it underlines problems with those aspects and indicate a sort of “clinginess” to external factors (work, people, an object such as internet or drugs, etc.). It indicates dependency, simply. But it could also refer to the extreme aspect of the upright, such as being so independent and autonomous you reject the outer world to avoid any influence. It is not an healthier habit and also create conflicts between you and the world, and by consequences demonstrate a conflict within you, an instability.

Therefore, this month it will be important to be careful about what you tell yourself. Are you trying to slack off on your responsibilities as an individual by clinging on everything around you? Are you rejecting the world because you want to avoid being hurt (Three of Blades)? What causes you insecurities? What are the lies you tend to tell yourself? Beware of deception. Also, beware of the reasons you believe you do or do not do things. Insecurities underlies the self this month, so you better watch out your intention and be honest with yourself.

12- Challenge: R. 001. The Matrix

This card is known as The Magician, and again, it points out that self-deception seems to be nonetheless the foundation on which you may lie, but it is also the challenge you need to face this month. It speaks of over confidence or even a lack of confidence, resulting in a distorted perception of the world and the self. It is linked to the previous card strongly, to insecurities issues, therefore this cards ask to address those issues that makes you fall for overly confident attitude or to over critical habits toward yourself. 

Esteem and confidence are fundamental aspects that lead to a healthy self. When they are low, whatever the reasons, it will inevitably create problems within you and without, with your relationships and the world around. You need to identify what you need and seek the necessary knowledge to enlighten yourself and allow you to follow a stable, healthy and self development path. Also to destroy any misconceptions or “false knowledge” about you or the world in order to acquire a realistic perception. Some of your relationships are good place to seek advice from where to start, as it is also a recommendation this month that to deepen your bond. If you try to connect with people by sharing your insecurities, you sure cannot mistake that it will be positive for the relationship, unless you are involved with a toxic individual. In the latter case, rather find someone to help you deal with them. An easy way to spot them: they will use your insecurities against you instead of uplifting you.

In the end, the challenge this month directly concerns self knowledge and misconceptions around the self. Be prepared to face yourself, it is a painful path to take.

13- Negative Energies: Ten of Cups

This card represent an energy that will hinder your way. But how come the Ten of Cups be a negative? I know right. I suggest to look out the Ten of Cups in the picture. It represents a man hiding with hands a woman’s eyes. What does it make you think? At which theme may it be linked?

Deception. Family. Romantic relationships. Younger sibling. Manipulation (dependence). Appearances can be deceiving. This card at this position suggests that quite happiness may be the white lies you were warned by the R. Nine of Coins and also the R. 001. The Matrix. When things go so smoothly that you rather not question it, that’s the energy to be aware of, as it is not a positive one. You may desire to believe everything is fine to not suffer from the underlying truth, therefore you, or maybe someone else, blind you from the real state of things. Also, as deception is an important theme and challenge, don’t let the 019. The Eclipse that  is an important aspect of the Self this Month, turns into an obstacle by falling for over positivism and bot wanting to see the negatives or the downsides of an issue. Being positive is important, but wanting to focus only on the positive is a way to blind yourself from reality and simply blind yourself from underlying pains and problems.

Thus beware of tranquility and “perfect” moments. Because are they? Isn’t there something fishy? Yesterday were you and a significant other in conflict and suddenly, without any talk, everything has gone fine? Do not be blinded, face the truth. Conflict do not simply resolve with time. The only reason why it does is because over time, you confront bit by bit the problem. Nothing solve itself on itself, judgments, decisions and actions are needed.

14- Advice: R. Page of Coins

What can you do then? What actions can you make? Well, first you will need to think, not to act. Pause yourself and ask yourself the right questions. What are you facing? What are the problems you were previously involved? Was the case closed? Or are you still feeling wronged somewhere? What have you done and not done that lead you where you are? Where do you want to be?

Usually, reversed, this cards speaks of procrastination, being lazy and avoiding responsibilities. Therefore, as an advice it will suggest to reflect an not act too quickly, but it also warns to not stay too passive. You need to know what is going on, to gain knowledge of the situations you are involved in or will may be involved in before acting. You cannot rush things. The process matter as much as the result, if not more than the result. The result is but a proof your process was meaningful. Thus, it is important to take the time to commit to the rightful actions you need. Both pausing and acting will be important steps to follow if you want to solve any challenge you will be faced this month. So, gain the knowledge but do not avoid your responsibilities, and take actions where they need to be taken.

15- Positive Energies: R. 0.10. The Wheel of fortune.

And how come this card be a positive energy down side huh? Not having every circumstances on your side is not always bad. Swimming against the current is an intimidating challenge, but it will make you extremely strong. Of course, know the limits, however life doesn’t make things easy and sometimes you are forced to swim against life’s events if you want to succeed and live well. Learning the hard way is sometimes the only way to learn, as without those difficult circumstances you would never have waken up from your delusions. Therefore, the fact that things aren’t going your way is the best way for you to overcome the painful circumstances that you may be confronted with. Remember that positivism is key of the Self this month. Look forward for the most positive outcome without loosing touch with reality, with how things are when they come to light.

Also, see this card as a way to commit to your actions. You have done things, or some people have done things in the past, therefore results and consequences will result from them, and you will have to take accountability for them. However, nothing is played until it is. You have the power to choose from now on how you can bring back yourself from this downfall. You are the one that chooses how to react and cope with the situations life throws at you.

16- The Self Outcome- R. Nine of Blades

Again, this card can mean two things. Either you will overcome your anxieties, your fears or whatever was diving you into extremely negative thoughts and perceptions, or you will fall for the darkness.

The will and the power you have is again an important factor that will decide if you will see light at the end of the tunnel or further darkness on a seemingly endless path. If you decide to confront what needs to be, in you especially, you should see that things will become clearer and the fog of deception, delusions and fears will slowly leave your vision. However, remember carefully what you must be aware of and what you must follow if this results is what you seek to attain.

17- Overall outcome: R. Five of Batons

Once again and for a final time, this cards lead to two possible conclusions. Either you will find common ground and solve any conflict that was put in your way, leading to a peaceful resolution after such difficulties, pain and turmoil. Or you will simply avoid a necessary fight. By that I mean, you will simply flee instead of confronting what was put on your way, thus possibly postponing major conflict in your life. 

This month is meant to challenge yourself and your interpersonal problems, it is meant to put many obstacles in your way. Thus, it is meant to challenge you. It is a necessary fight. Don’t believe fleeing means resolution. Ironically and sadly, you may believe it will be the case, but by experiences I can tell you that people tend to confuse avoidance with acceptance and resolution. And also by experience, Karma is a bitch. It will find you and it will give you twice the burden until you decide to take the rightful actions upon this burden to alleviate it. I don’t suggest to test it, Karma is a pretty susceptible bitchy energy.

Day 1: What am I leaping into this month?

The High Priestess I am diving deeper into my subconsciousness, connecting with my spiritual side and preparing my energy to manifest. I’ve also noticed that i’ve become more quiet and reserved this month, feeling like i can’t express my thoughts and feelings coherently. I’ve also ran away from an argument with my partner and she had to drag me out of my shell. So right now i’m feeling this card on simpler level as well, such as getting in touch with my deep emotions.

Day 2: What am I ready to manifest this month?

4 of Swords Reversed I am ready to come back into real world as soon as i’ll connect with my spiritual side properly. I’ve been working on finding energy for job search and future planning but my emotional problems overshadowed these ambitions. Now, after a proper rest and healing i need to start acting instead of dreaming.

Day 3: What am I ready to shed this month?

CARDS: Wheel of Fortune Reversed, Page of Cups, The Unknown Card

Reversed, The Wheel of Fortune card can indicate that someone has lost balance in some area of life. The may feel as though their instincts are wrong, their intuition is off, and their timing is bad. It is important to pause in order to get back into step with the universe. 

The Page of Cups signifies the beginning of a relationship, usually romantic or spiritual. It can also indicate a new birth. The Page is a messenger, a sensitive soul, open to honest and heartfelt communication.It’s important to be open minded and receptive to new opportunities. The figure in the pool of water concentrates on a cup glowing with the message that she needs to receive or convey. She reminds us to be loving, intimate, gentle, and emotional. 

The Crystal Visions deck includes one unknown card, which represents an answer that’s not yet meant to be revealed. It can signify something from the past that one may not fully understand, or something that will happen soon. Wherever the Unknown Card falls within a spread will indicate what area still needs to unfold and that further steps need to be taken in order to clarify the bigger picture. the Unknown Card can also signify the importance of one looking deeper into the issue at hand in order to find answers. It can also represent the importance of moving forward with an open mind and without bias. The figure in the card beckons the querent to take a look into her crystal ball, however, the image in the ball is cloudy and unclear. With time patience, and introspection, the picture will soon be revealed.

A: You’ve been unbalanced, and the intuition you’ve relied on so well is failing as you step into this new environment, fully immersing yourself into a new chapter of your relationship. You are stepping into the unknown, which can be terrifying, and thrilling at the same time. Learn how to differentiate the two.