My edit Two men in love reached 500k views. Thank you so much to everyone watching and loving this edit still so many years after it was posted. This is probably the biggest milestone it will reach for a long time and I want to take a minute to talk about this edit.
Two men in love is the reason I started editing jikook. I was a baby army back then, new to jikook. I had just spent some months going down the rabbit hole and watching all the content there was. I was already convinced jikook were a couple.
Just a few months before, I started back my channel after years of hiatus with my Slytherin House edit. And I discovered BTS while crafting this edit (BS&T had such Slytherin vibes).
I didn't know what I would edit next after the Slytherin edit. I intended for my channel to be multifandom. But then jikook hit me right in the guts.
I observed their love closely and got so many feelings from them. I saw something sooo beautiful in them. So genuine and pure.
And one day, out of the blue, I got this idea of a trilogy of video. It honestly felt divinely guided, I had this urge to make it, like this was vital for me. I had to pour those feelings out in some way.
So that's how was born the trilogy Beautiful Crime -> IDFC (How it started) -> Two men in love.
If you know anything about editing you would know that this trilogy is more advanced than basically any jikook videos I made on the channel. Probably because it is the only one where I felt such divine inspiration for it.
Ending on Two men in love, was supposed to showcase the core of their relationship. Pure unfiltered unconditional love.
I honestly thought I would stop editing them after this. For me that was it. But of course I became even more obsessed with jikook over time, and got more ideas for edits, so I have been continuing to edit them for the past 8 years. My channel became mostly jikook (even if sometimes I dabbled in other fandoms to switch things up) but jikook and editing became my main source of joy.
I come from an art background, I was an art director and webdesigner. At my former job my creativity had always been smashed under the weight of corporation, of big luxury brands who didn't care about what I wanted or how I wanted to express myself. I hated my job. I didn't find any joy in it.
But when I was editing, I had no one to tell me that was I was doing wasn't good enough. I had no one breathing on my neck about technicalities. I could do whatever I wanted and express exactly what I had inside of me. It didn't have to be perfect. Hell I know that from a technical standpoint my edits are far from perfect. But it didn't matter to me, because I didn't have to please anybody other than me, and it allowed me to just have fun.
Editing allowed me to find freedom and joy of creating back.
And it was mine, no one else's. That's why this channel is so precious to me still. And it was all thanks to Two men in love.
When I first posted those edits, I didn't know anybody would watch them. And I didn't make them for people but for me. But when I saw they blew up (Especially Two men in love), I was surprised and touched. So many people were giving me and jikook so much love.
For one of the first times in my life, I felt like what I created mattered, that it could reach people and make them feel things.
Since I didn't like my former job and always had imposter syndrom for having no passion for it, people loving my creations made me feel like yeah, I could be an artist somehow. That I did have creativity and it was not a fluke.
My channel helped me so much over the years to gain some confidence in my own self. It helped me have more self-love, and be kinder to myself.
People started following me after I posted the edits, and at first I was a very small accounts who minded her business in a small corner, but then the following grew.
It was a bit shocking to me at first because I never liked to be exposed. I don't like having attention to myself. But I thought that if people followed me for my creations it was ok.
Since then I met so many lovely people, made long term friends, had so many incredibly sweet moments with each of you in our journey of supporting jikook.
All of this, is very very dear to me. Y'all are very dear to me.
Because you helped me in so many ways.
I made Two men in love at the darkest time in my life. In 2019, is when I had this whole experience of spending 3 weeks in hell. When I was editing Two men in love, I just came out of it. I had heavy PTSD. I couldn't even close my eyes because of the fear. I was having nightmares. I was still tormented day and night. I couldn't even form thoughts yet because my psyche and being had been entirely destroyed, broken into million pieces.
And yet I was at my computer making Two men in love.
Because I guess that in the midst of all this darkness, I wanted to create something beautiful. I wanted to reach for the light. And jikook was it for me. They shined so bright.
And even if I was at my worst, what I wanted to share was unconditional love. That's truly what mattered to me. And it was for nobody. It was a lifeline I was holding on to.
It helped me remember that there were still some things worth living for. And that this pit of darkness I found myself in was not the end.
It was the beginning of my healing and integrating journey that lasted 5 years.
I went through some incredibly painful things while I healed. And continuing to edit jikook and enjoy the fandom allowed me to keep a pocket of light that was just mine, away from any BS I was going through.
So thank you. To everyone who loved this edit. To everyone who kept sending me messages, telling me this edit helped them when they were depressed.
Thank you because each of you helped me in a tremendous way.
Two men in love will always be special to me because of all of the reasons I said.
I'm grateful I got to make this, and that thanks to it I got to grow into the person I am now, with the help of all of you.
1 million next? 🤣 probably in 8 more years!
Thank you, thank you, everybody, from the bottom of my heart.
I love you all 💜
