Itās always so loud in his dreams, and maybe thatās why Cas has trouble sleeping. At night, the bunker is pitch-black and completely silent, and while heās exhausted every morning, at least heās not haunted by endless visions of that which came before.Ā
He wishes this was easier.
The adjustment to being human has been like trying to claw his way out of a pit. It wasnāt enough to find out that they managed to save the world, after all, no more apocalypses and no more uncaring God, and it wasnāt enough to find himself awake in the Empty, rough hands he knew well wrapped around his wrists, pulling him to some semblance of safety. Heās not sure what will be enough.Ā
Right now, as he lies in bed, he contemplates his newfound humanity and freedom, and as he does, he notices small sounds in the silence. Most notable is Dean breathing beside him, fast asleep with his face mashed into his pillow. Dean still sleeps like the dead, still gets grumpy when you wake him up. Now, after a tear-stained welcome back, Cas is privy to those habits, among others. And there are other things, besides the man beside him, that Cas is privy to now. Everything is sharper, deeper, and itās an adjustment, and itās not easy, but itĀ has to be worth it.Ā
Slowly, the quiet, punctuated by Deanās breath, lulls Cas back to sleep, and for once, he doesnāt dream at all.Ā