I committed to a college but I dont want to go there. Not a bad school just a reputation of being easy to get in and a party school. I got into my dream school, declined because my family couldn’t afford and my health stops me from living away from home. I know I made a smart decision that fits my living situation but im terrified of my peers making false assumptions about me: like Im too stupid to get in anywhere else. How can I handle my fear of judgment and feel more confident in my decision?
You made a smart decision based on your finances and your health. Own that decision! You can spend your whole time at college wishing you were somewhere else with a different reputation, or you can throw yourself into the college experience, work hard, meet people, get involved with activities, and make the most of where you are. There are pros and cons to every college, and going to a more expensive college doesn’t guarantee a better personal experience.
If people you know are voicing assumptions about you because of the college you go to, that’s on them. You don’t need to justify yourself by going into detail about your reasons for being there (”oh I only go there because I had to stay close to home”). You can say “this decision made the most sense to me” and leave it at that, or you can question them and make them feel uncomfortable for making assumptions. “What do you mean by that?”. “Why did you say that?”. “Oh, that was kind of rude to people who go to that school, me included”. “You seem very opinionated on the school I go to, why?”. “Huh, that’s a weird thing to say”. It’s not your job to convince them to change their minds. It’s your job to support yourself in the decision that you made.
If you’re making assumptions about the kind of people who go to your college, try to keep an open mind about the people you meet. Remember that you’re not the only student in the school who factored personal circumstances into their college decision! Some people will be there based on their high school grades (which is not a particularly accurate measure of someone’s intelligence), some will be there based on their financial situation, some will be there because they want to stay close to home for whatever reason, some will be there because believe it or not, they actually like the school, and most people will be there for a combination of reasons. Avoid treating your peers like ‘stupid party animals’, and treat them as fellow people who made the decision to come to your school based on a variety of factors. You’re not better or worse than anyone because of the colleges you get into.
