#parent!bucky

But this, this was what was going to crack the former brainwashed assassin, ex winter soldier. A three foot tall miniaturized version of you, looking up at him with chubby little cheeks, a big bright smile and his blue eyes, wearing a princess dress and her Bucky bear -a gift from Uncle Sam- tucked under her arm. She had her little hand up, nails painted sparkly pink -like mommys- making a ‘gimme’ motion. Why was she doing this, because mommy needed a coffee from starbies -he’s pretty sure that’s what she said anyway- and apparently the coffee here wasn’t good enough. 

The funniest part of this whole display as you listened about ten feet away was you didn’t even mention wanting Starbucks, you had been making your iced coffee and huffed because someone -James- used the last of your ‘too sweet coffee creamer’ in his coffee. And your endearing little girl took it upon herself to rectify the situation and well if mommy got starbies, she would get her little pink drink -non-caffeinated of course- and a cake pop and we would probably go to the TJ Max that was across the street. She was learning very quickly how to get what she wanted. The biggest problem with that was the fact  her daddy couldn’t say no to that adorable chubby cheeked toddler. He had an easier time saying no to you, a feat in itself. 

He caught your eye, your smile hiding behind your hand, sparkly pink nails matching their tiny terror and your wedding rings glinting in the sun from the window. He looked torn, almost betrayed thinking you set their precious baby up to go and ask for Starbucks. Which was frankly ridiculous because he and you both knew if you wanted it, you’d go get it. You figured this was coming from her watching you always let Bucky know you were going and where, and in her toddler brain that meant asking daddy for permission and monies as she called it. It was incredibly adorable. You shook your head, shrugging. As if to say ‘this is all her,’ and he let out a defeated sigh. 

“Here baby,” his card was laid in her tiny hand and she triumphantly cheered and turned, running up the hall toward you, you crouched and scooped her up. “Looks mommy, we’s gots daddy’s monies, we can get starbies now!” She cheered, proud of her negotiation skills, your heart swelled at her endearing little face. Your eyes filled with happiness. 

Who knew two former assassins could find this kind of love and normalcy in their life. 

And yes, you got Starbucks, she got her pink drink and cake pop. And you went to TJ Max and bought some fun nail stuff for you guys to try.

Their relationship held a lot of darkness. It was built on the death of someone they both loved very dearly. But that was why Y/N realized they needed to keep as much fun in their relationship as possible. And after all these years together, it was vital.

Bucky’s laughter slowly quieted and he stared at her lovingly.

Y/N sipped some of her wine to get away from his gaze. After all this time, she couldn’t help but squirm and blush when he looked at her like that. “What are you staring at, mister?”

“Will you marry me?” He asked softly.

“Oh my goodness!” Y/N practically screeched in laughter. “You haven’t given me a proposal in so long! I forgot how entertaining they are!”

Bucky set his beer on the coffee table and crawled toward her on the couch. Then he carefully took her wine glass out of her hand as well. He gently gripped her hips, holding her in place. His lips found her collar bone first. It was peeking out from her baggy flannel that actually belonged to Bucky. Then his lips danced up her neck.

“Are you sure you don’t want to marry me, doll?” He hummed and finally kissed her lips. “Y/N Barnes…it’s a sexy name.”

She huffed at that. “Yeah… Well, I’m old with two kids now. Sexy isn’t really my thing anymore.” But she happily intensified the kiss.

“Oh, I beg to differ. Especially when you wearing my clothes.” Bucky gave her a devilish smirk and he undid the top button of her shirt.

“Someone’s getting handsy…” She breathed.

“We have the house to ourselves. Frankie’s spending the night with Jimmy at the compound…” Bucky was already down a few more buttons.

Y/N could barely think straight as she faintly nodded and wrapped her legs around Bucky’s waist, pulling his groan closer to her. Soon their clothes were coming off.

Raising two kids, enhanced ones at that, was exhausting and time consuming. Bucky and Y/N’s relationship was still filled with love and … desire. But it was just hard to find time for themselves like they could before Frankie was born. Their relationship started with a kid already in the picture. But their daughter was definitely more of a handful than Jimmy ever had been.

Soon the living room was filled with soft moans and grunts. Y/N’s breathing became heavier and quicker. Just as she was about to reach that point, the front door flew open.

“Mom! Dad! Jimmy got called out onto a mission so I figured I’d come home and sleep in- JESUS FUCKING CHRIST!” Frankie screamed out. In her panic, her telekinesis power had a mind of its own and flung a pile of newspapers into the air to obscure the traumatizing view in front of her.

“Oh my god!” Y/N yelped in embarrassment and shock.

“Are you two seriously having sex on the couch!?” Y/N screamed with her back to them. “I sit there!”

Y/N, not really knowing how else to handle the situation, just started laughing uncontrollably. Meanwhile Bucky, still a man of the past (no matter how long he lived in the future), was bright red and covering his face with his hand as embarrassed groans came from the back of his throat.

“I am deeply disturbed and I am going back to the compound.” Frankie mumbled. “Hopefully there’s a bottle of bleach there I can pour all over my eyeballs. Too bad Wanda went on the mission too, maybe she can make me forget I ever saw THAT.” Without waiting for a response from her parents, Frankie slammed the front door behind her.

The tension in Bucky’s shoulders lessened when he heard the sound of Frankie’s Honda Cafe Racer roar to life and speed away.

“You know…she gets that sailor’s mouth from you.” Bucky mumbled.

“Guilty.” Y/N giggled, now having Bucky’s flannel on her again. “You're really mortified right now, aren’t you?” She playfully poked him in the nose.

Bucky nodded with a dazed look in his eyes. “Did we just traumatize our daughter into a lifetime of therapy?”

Y/N rolled her eyes. “You really think Frankie doesn’t know about sex, Buck?”

Bucky glared at her. “I’d like to think that she doesn’t.”

“She’s 17 Bucky!” Y/N laughed at his ridiculousness.

“Wait, is Frankie having sex with someone!?” Bucky cried out.

“Calm down. I’m not about to discuss our daughter’s sex life with you. I promised it would remain a mother/daughter conversation.” But she saw how desperate Bucky was looking at her. “When you need to know about a guy in Frankie’s life, I’ll tell you. Deal?”

He nodded grumpily.

“Should-Should we go to the compound and talk to her?” He asked softly. Now the guilt was seeping in. The situation was probably more embarrassing for Frankie than them.

“No. We should give her some space. I’ll talk to her tomorrow.” Y/N shrugged. “Unless…you want to be the one to talk to her.”

“Look, I respect your whole sex-positive and progressive thing. It’s one of the things I love about you.” Bucky sighed as he ran a hand through his hair. “But I’m stuck in my old ways, no matter how long I live in this time period. And when I say ‘old ways’ I mean parents didn’t talk about sex with their kids back then and we all pretended it didn’t exist.”

Y/N scoffed teasingly at that. “Well, that’s why kids get pregnant at 15, Bucky. But I understand.”

“When did she get so grown up?” Bucky sighed. It took half a glimpse for Frankie to comprehend what she walked in on. What happened to his little, innocent girl?

Y/N pat his shoulder. “It happens fast, Buck.”

Then a thought suddenly occurred to him. “Has she ever had a boyfriend?”

Once middle school came around, Frankie got closer to her mother. She would always be a daddy’s girl. But there was just some things Bucky wasn’t equipped to handle when it came to being a pre-teen girls in middle school.

 It was hard to see some distance grow between the two of them. But he understood that Frankie now had things in her life that she wasn’t comfortable talking to him about.

“No.” Y/N stated firmly.

“How are you so sure?” Bucky pushed.

“Because she’s picky, like her mom. Well, picky is not the right word. She knows her worth and she refuses to settle.” Y/N smiled, thinking about the few times she’s seen her daughter around boys her age. “There’s not a boy at her school that doesn’t have a crush on her though.” Bucky growled. Y/N laughed at his response and jumped off the couch. “But she’s not interested.”

“Why not?”

Y/N cringed, knowing Bucky wasn’t going to like the answer. “Well, she’s like me in that way too.” He narrowed his eyes, not following. “She likes older guys.” Y/N giggled at Bucky’s horrified expression. This was almost too much fun.

He was clearly deep in thought and going into crazy, over-protective dad mode.

“Bucky!” Y/N snapped, bring him back to reality. “Do you want to keep talking about our daughter’s love life? Or do you wanna finish what you started…in the bedroom…with the door locked?”

That finally brought Bucky out of it. He grinned and stood up from the couch. Before Y/N could predict his actions, he threw her body over his shoulders. She yelped out in surprise when he added a slap to her butt.

“James Buchanan Barnes, did you just smack my ass?!” She screeched.

“You bet I did, doll.” And he carried her up to their bedroom. 

Bucky was covered in sweat, having just got back from basically running a marathon. He’d been off active duty for so long, but his body never showed any indication of it. He finally started showing some small signs of aging: some grey in his scruff and little creases around his eyes. But people were still frightened by his strong stature and threatening posture. Somehow just by looking at him they knew he had the ability to kill them in seconds.

Bucky stopped abruptly in the doorway when he saw Frankie sitting at the kitchen counter with her phone in her hand and a coffee mug in the other.

Her whole body froze when she saw him.

“Look, we don’t have to talk about it. Mom already gave me a speech. I’d really prefer if we pretended it never happened.” The words rushed off Frankie lips.

Bucky just nodded and looked at the ground. “I’m sorry we made you uncomfortable.” His words were so quiet and unlike him.

Frankie couldn’t help but laugh lightly. “Sometimes I wish you and mom didn’t love each other so much. Why can’t you be like all my friends’ parents?”

Bucky raised an eyebrow in amusement. “And what exactly are they like?”

“Oh you know. They barely tolerate each other. Probably haven’t had sex in years. Their kids have just completely desexualized them at this point.” Her tone was sassy, but her words were true. “A couple of my friends once told me they’ve never even seen their parents kiss…” Her face dropped, suddenly realizing that it was actually sort of sad.

“What about kissing?” Y/N practically danced into the room. Without getting an answer, she kissed Frankie on the forehead and then spun to Bucky, kissing him on the lips. “You get two,” laughing before kissing him again. She disappeared from the kitchen just as quickly as they arrived.

Bucky saw his daughter’s expression change. “Do you really wish we were more like that?”

Frankie gave him small smirk. “No. Without you and mom, I’d probably think love is dead. I’ve never seen any of those other dads look at their wives the way you look at mom.”

She downed the rest of her coffee and put her mug in the sink before heading out of the kitchen.

“Hey Frankie?” Bucky said hurriedly.

“Yeah?”

“If you ever do want to…talk…about you know…” He stumbled over his offer. Why was it so much easier to talk to Jimmy about this stuff? Because he’s a boy, an annoyed voice reminded him in his head.

Frankie looked utterly amused. “Dad, I can stick with mom on this certain area. But I appreciate you saying that anyways.” Then she chuckled. “Jeez, she was right: you really are old-fashioned and uptight about sex.”

Bucky groaned.

“Sex!” Frankie yelled, loving the reaction it caused from him. “Sex, sex, sex, sex, sex!” She chanted as she ran up the stairs into her room.

I thought this request was hilarious. If you didn’t pick up on it, my parents are definitely the opposite of Y/N & Bucky. lol

Bucky moves the load of laundry Natasha had started for him into the dryer. It smells clean but there will forever be a slight stain from puke on the ladybug print sheets. He can try his heavy duty stain remover on it later, but he knows there is only so much that can be done for white fabric and bodily fluids. There’s a reason most of his scrubs are black. After checking in on Becca, Bucky begs Natasha to stay a little longer so he can run down to the bodega to pick up a few things for when Becca wakes up. He would have sworn they had an extra bottle of Pedialyte, but apparently they’d used it up during Becca’s last bout with the flu. 

Natasha waits patiently, listening to Bucky complain about his shift while he quickly changes out of his scrubs into a pair of soft grey sweats and an old Blink 182 tshirt. She’s been his best friend since their first year of college when they met in Intro to Biology. The two of them have been inseparable ever since, both even choosing to stay in Brooklyn after college instead of going back to where they were from. Natasha’s family was from Russia but traveled a lot so she was happy staying in the city that felt like home to her, and Bucky would have done just about anything to avoid going back to the tiny town in Indiana where his parents were still selling drugs out of their trailer and making each other miserable. 

Bucky had thought he was free of his family forever when NYU accepted him into their nursing program. It was his way out of a poverty stricken little town that people rarely escaped from. Bucky had left home at eighteen with no intentions of returning, and he probably never would have, but during his last year of nursing school he found out through Facebook that his thirty eight year old mother was pregnant. To no one’s surprise, his mom was still dealing, still with his deadbeat dad, and was too far along when she found out she was pregnant to have any other option than having the baby. It was a repeat of the situation she’d found herself in at sixteen when she had Bucky. Knowing what it was like to grow up in that house, Bucky couldn’t allow another child to be brought into such a toxic environment. As soon as his mom confirmed the news was true, he hopped on the next flight out to Indiana and started the process to legally adopt his sister once she was born. 

When Rebecca Grace Barnes came into the world nine weeks early the doctors said it was a miracle she survived. She was so small, just barely three pounds, and needed to stay in the NICU for just over a month. Bucky had made arrangements with his professors to turn in exams and papers online, barely managing to finish up his nursing degree while biding his time before he could go back to Brooklyn with his baby sister. It had been a wild ride trying to get his nursing career started while caring for a newborn but Natasha had been a life saver. She and their other friend Clint had stepped up in a huge way, helping to watch Becca when he needed to work and daycare wasn’t open. Their schedules had gotten even messier recently when Becca started preschool. Bucky is counting down the days until kindergarten starts so their schedules will align enough for him to only lean on Nat and Clint one or two days a week at most. 

“Are you even listening to me?” Natasha throws a balled up Minnie Mouse sock at Bucky who’s too tired to dodge and instead gets a face full of pink fleece. 

“Yeah, Nat,” Bucky sighs, wishing he could take off his aching prosthetic but knowing he’ll need both hands for shopping bags. “I’m getting you a choco taco and a red bull this time. I got you.” 

Natasha nods happily, completely unphased by Bucky’s eye roll. She’s getting her wake up juice and her crunchy chocolatey sugar, and that is all that matters.

Bucky rushes around the bodega grabbing everything he’ll need to deal with a sick kid, throwing things in the basket without even bothering to check price tags. His bank account will hate him, but he doesn’t exactly have time or options to find the best deals. Grabbing Nat’s items and an iced coffee for himself, he waits in line as an older man chats with the clerk while the teenager rings up his order. The television in the corner is playing the local news, apparently Captain America visited a rec center in Brooklyn recently. There are sound bites from elderly residents and young kids fawning over him, and one of the Captain himself extolling the importance of community and keeping kids off the streets.

Bucky thinks his eyes will get stuck in the back of his head with how hard he rolls them. “This fucking guy.” Bucky grumbles as he places his basket on the counter, unloading his stuff. 

The clerk nods in silent agreement.

“I’m sure he was a ‘bright shining beacon of hope’ back in WWII but he has no clue what’s going on in the real word nowadays.” Bucky continues.

The clerk nods once again and Bucky, feeling particularly exhausted and grumpy, yells over at the TV, “It’s not all rainbows and sunshine Captain Clueless!”  

“Captain Clueless?” A deep voice rumbles from behind him, “I’ve been called a lot of things over the years, but that’s a new one.” 

Bucky sees the clerk's face go pale and the kid freezes, confirming what Bucky feared when he heard that rich baritone behind him. Oh fuck. 

Turning around, Bucky prepares himself for the worst. Instead, he finds an extremely amused looking Captain America holding a bottle of water and a bag of swedish fish. 

“I’m… I… I didn’t mean…” Bucky stammers. He doesn’t know how to politely explain I meant every word but never meant for you to hear it. 

The register pings as the clerk frantically finishes ringing up Bucky’s order, trying to get both men out of the shop before the situation can get any worse. The sound startles Bucky and he turns around to see the green blinking $58.79 on the little box. His stomach sinks, there went grocery shopping for the week. But, he reasons, Becca won’t want much for a few days while she recovers and he’s no stranger to a ramen-only diet. They’ll get by, just like they always do. 

Before Bucky can hand over his last three twenties, a sleek black card taps against the card reader and the machine starts blinking, processing it. Bucky spins around in surprise only to literally face plant into a solid wall of muscle. Muscle that smells like tea tree and mint, yum. Bucky moves backwards in surprise, bumping into the counter but getting himself away from the giant of man who’s also moving backwards after their collision. 

“It’s on me.” Steve tells him with a shrug. 

“You didn’t have to do that.” Bucky insists, “I insulted you.” 

“You were just being honest.” Steve reasons, “I don’t get to hear people’s honest opinions all that much.” 

“That has to be weird.” 

Steve chuckles, “Pal, you got no idea.” 

“Well, thank you. And I am sorry you heard that.” Bucky collects his bags, still dumbfounded by the whole experience. 

“I’d like to hear more about why you said it. Whatever you think it is I’m missing about the twenty-first century. I’m just out for a run so if you don’t mind company on your way back to wherever, maybe we could talk?” 

Bucky shakes his head. The man actually wants to learn how to be a better person after being insulted by a random grungey stranger in a bodega. “You really are Captain America.” Bucky murmurs, still stunned. 

Steve chuckles again; a deep, throaty sound. “Yeah, guilty as charged. But you can just call me Steve.” Steve winks conspiratorially and Bucky thinks he might actually combust. No one should be allowed to be that good looking. 

Bucky waits as the cashier rings Steve up for his things and Steve taps his card again to pay. “I thought it was weird enough getting a card that swiped when I came out of the ice, but now this one doesn’t even swipe. It just taps and poof, done.” Steve says with a faint tone of awe. 

Bucky can’t imagine how many things Steve needed to adjust to after waking up from the ice. “Far cry from what you were used to, huh?” 

“Well, it sure beats keeping coins in old coffee cans.” 

Bucky glances over at Steve as they leave the bodega together, “You do that whole ‘awe shucks, man out of time’ thing really well. Is it real though? No offense, you can’t really be that well adjusted. You’re still human.”

Steve meets Bucky’s eyes for a moment, crystalline blue piercing into smoke grey-blue, assessing him. After a few beats he decides Bucky is someone who can handle the truth. “It’s a lot easier to do that than to curse up a storm every time some piece of tech pisses me off. Plays out a lot better with the whole Captain America image too.”  

“I didn’t think Captain America even knew how to swear.” Bucky teases. 

“He doesn’t, but Steve Rogers does. I grew up in Brooklyn, I know how to curse.” 

Bucky laughs, swinging his bags idly as they walk in silence for a few steps.

Steve breaks the silence, reminding him of why they’re walking down the street together in the first place, “So really, why do you think I’m so out of touch? Because I thought SHIELD did a bang up job teaching me about the world and what I missed while I was out.” 

“I’m sure they did, but SHIELD is still an agency with their own ideas and agendas. I promise you, you got a watered down version of real life. Do me a favor; when you get home look up what they say about The Great Depression and WWII. Do a little research on how we look back at those times. Then think about how it really was back then when you were living it. I would bet you lunch that the two don’t line up.” 

“I never thought about it that way.” Steve admits. “I’ll look it up today, promise.”

They arrive on Bucky’s stoop and he climbs up a step, looking down at Steve instead of up at him. He wants to know what Steve thinks once he does some research but doesn’t know how to ask. Luckily, Steve beats him to it. 

“I’m going to need your number if you’re taking me out to lunch.” Steve says casually, a light hint of teasing. 

Bucky blushes, trying to remind himself that he was the one who threw the lunch bet out there. Steve Rogers would never just ask him out like that. “I… uh… um…” he fumbles anyway.

Steve takes a step back in retreat, his own cheeks flaming. “I’m sorry, that was. I’m sorry. You clearly have a sick kid to get back to, and I’m sure a lovely wife waiting for you too.” he motions at Bucky’s bags. “Thank you, for being honest with me.” Steve turns to hurry off and, thankfully, Bucky’s brain catches up with him.

“Steve, no.” he blurts out. “No wife. Sick kid, yes. But no, um, no one else. If you want my number, I’ll give it to you. My schedule is a little weird because of my job but I do want to know what you think when you get done looking things up.” 

Steve smiles up at Bucky, soft and hopeful and genuine. It isn’t the All American facade grin he uses for the cameras, and it feels all the more special to Bucky because of it. Steve hands over his phone to Bucky so he can enter in his contact info and then sends him a quick text so Bucky has his number too. “So, I’ll call you later then?” Steve tries, sounding a little unsure still.

“Yeah, I’ll look forward to it, Steve.” Bucky looks up at his doorway, knowing he needs to get back to Becca but not wanting Steve to leave quite yet. 

Steve takes the hint and gives him another soft smile and a small wave as he turns and heads off down the bustling city sidewalk. 

Bucky stands there a moment, collecting himself and trying to process it all, before hurrying back upstairs to his little apartment to relieve Natasha of babysitting duty.

“Whoa, calm it down little miss.” Bucky grumbles. 

“I’m gonna be late!” 

Bucky looks over at the alarm clock and realizes she’s right. “Shit.” 

“Bad word!!” 

“Becca!” Bucky snaps and instantly regrets it. “Quieter, bug. Please. Come on, let’s get moving.” 

Bucky hurries Becca through her morning routine, grabbing her tiny backpack and breakfast on their way out the door. Bucky knows he’s a mess, hair sloppily thrown up in a bun, sweatpants and a hoodie because he just can’t take the time to find real clothes. He doesn’t even bother to throw on his prosthetic. Becca nibbles at her string cheese and mini muffins as they hustle down the busy city sidewalks to her school, just finishing as they round the last corner. He gives her a quick hug and kiss before she runs into the building screeching hello to the teacher at the door. The teacher gives Bucky an odd look that he chalks up to him looking like a hot mess and he gives her a small wave and terse smile in return. 

It’s early yet and Bucky doesn’t have to worry about work for a few more hours so he decides to splurge and stop for coffee and a breakfast sandwich on his walk home. One treat won’t hurt and he’s still holding on to the warm feeling in his chest from last night’s date with Steve. Waiting in line a few other people give Bucky strange looks and he wonders how rough of shape he’s in. He prays there isn’t a giant rip on his clothes or something but after a discrete check he doesn’t think that’s the case. Just a weird morning then. 

The hoodie actually comes in handy once Bucky realizes he can’t carry both a sandwich and his coffee when he’s down an arm. Tucking the sandwich in his hoodie pouch, he sips the pumpkin spice latte slowly enjoying the sweet fall flavors on his way home. His phone starts chirping at him but with no free hand Bucky is forced to ignore it until he gets back to the apartment. It was going off earlier too and he figures who ever needs him so damn bad can just wait five more minutes. 

Bucky stretches out on the sofa to enjoy his breakfast, throwing on a random movie from his queue, when he finally looks at his phone. He wonders if the world is ending and he missed it somehow. Eight missed calls from Steve, two voicemails, and four texts. Two calls from Natasha, one voicemail, and two texts. Three texts from Clint. 

Natasha wants to know if he’s seen the news, if he’s okay, and what she can do to help. 

Clint also asks if he’s okay and tells him he’s an ass for not sharing the deets. 

Steve asks him repeatedly to call him, frantically apologizing in between. 

Still confused and becoming increasingly worried, Bucky brings up the news on his phone and finds his own face on the front page. The picture is from the night before, he and Steve walking back to his place with Becca on Steve’s shoulders. They look so happy that it tugs at Bucky’s heartstrings before the realization of what this means sinks in. He shoots a quick text to Natasha assuring her that he’s fine and he’ll catch up with her tonight. Clint gets two emojis in response: a thumbs up and the middle finger. Steve, he actually calls back. The blonde had sounded so worried in his voicemails. 

“Bucky, thank god.” Steve blurts out in lieu of hello. 

“Well good morning to you too.” Bucky jokes. 

“Are you okay? Is Becca okay?” 

“Yeah, Steve, we’re good. I just dropped Becca off a preschool. I don’t know what you’re worried about, it was a normal morning outside of a few funny looks. But honestly that was probably me going out looking like a hobo because I overslept.” 

“Buck…” Steve falters, “It won’t be long ‘til they figure out who you are. We can keep the press at bay here in the tower but you’re going to have some serious issues as soon as a reporter gets your name. You and Becca could come stay here for a bit or I can have a security team allocated to you both until the news dies down.” 

“Whoa, whoa, whoa. Slow down a minute. We don’t need security and I’m not dragging Becca to Manhattan just because some dudes with cameras may or may not come pester us. We’ll be okay.” 

“I’m just worried about you guys. You didn’t sign on for the shit storm that’s blowing up right now. I’m so sorry, Buck.” 

“Actually, I did.” Bucky points out, “I’m not stupid, Steve. I knew what I was signing on for the minute we started talking. It’s gonna be okay, nothing lasts forever and Becca is a resilient kid.” 

Steve is quiet for a long moment, trying to compose himself to say what he knows he needs to say. “If you need to take some time apart until this all dies down…” he chokes up and lets the sentence lie. 

“No.” Bucky’s voice is firm. “I’m not running on you again. We’re gonna deal with this together.” 

“Okay,” Steve sighs heavily in relief, “I’m going to be tied up today doing interviews. Apparently there’s no hiding the fact that I’m bisexual now. It’s funny that I’ve never tried to hide it but the news is claiming I’ve been ‘publicly outed’ by the tabloids. I’m not going to say a whole lot about you, about us. I don’t want to speak for you or anything. But if you’re okay with it, I would like to confirm that I’m in a relationship and that I care about you very much.” 

“Aww, you big sap. Yeah, of course that’s fine.” 

“Can I call you later when I have time?” 

“I’m working tonight but I’ll have a chance for a quick break around 10pm.” 

“I’ll talk to you then. If you need anything, I mean it Buck, anything, just call me. I’ll pick up on national TV if I have to.” 

Bucky rolls his eyes and hopes Steve can feel his exasperation through the phone lines. “Get going, ya punk. You have a country full of conservatives to horrify with your secret homosexual agenda.” 

Steve laughs, the first bit of happiness he’s had since waking up to the news. “Will do.” he says quickly and hangs up before his overly dramatic heart can blurt out something terribly stupid like I love you. He pushes down the tender, fledgling emotion, knowing it’s too fast but feeling the gentle flutters nonetheless. 

Natasha arrives at Bucky’s apartment a full hour early that night so he can get her caught up while making dinner for her and Becca, while Becca watches an episode of Wonder Pets in the living room. Natasha apparently watched a few interview clips of Steve’s and teases Bucky over how completely smitten they both are. It’s nice and normal, the teasing and banter over a new relationship with his best friend. It makes him think Steve really was just being overly concerned with his fears.

It’s a blessedly slow night at the ER and no one seems to recognize Bucky as he hops from one patient to the next, getting people stabilized and ready to be seen by one of the doctors on shift. When Steve calls at ten he sounds better than he had that morning. He’s exhausted from the media circus but pleased that he was able to get the story out in his own words. He asked for privacy for all their sakes but knows it won’t last long. Bucky continues to assure him that they’ll handle things as they come and to not worry. Steve can’t help but feel like it’s the calm before the storm. 

The calm only lasts until 2am. Dr. Strange pulls Bucky out of a patient room, pushing Darcy in to take his place and dragging him down the hall to the staff break room. “What the hell?” Bucky demands once the door is shut. 

Strange’s face is grim, “There are currently fifteen reporters in the lobby all asking if you’re working and if anyone has a statement they’d like to make.” 

Bucky’s stomach drops, “Fuck.” 

“Yes, fuck indeed. I’ve already made some calls and the police are on their way to clear house. We don’t expect that to last however. HR is willing to give you the rest of this week off, paid, while we sort out protocol for this sort of thing. Amanda will call you tomorrow to talk details once the board meets and decides what we can do to protect both you and our patients. We obviously can’t have reporters milling around every time you work.” 

Bucky doesn’t even know what to say. 

“If you want to go gather your things, Paul in security will escort you out the back away from the reporters.” 

“Okay,” Bucky agrees, because really what else can he do?

Darcy catches up with him as he’s packing up his locker, “They’re sending you home?” she cries, pulling him into a hug. 

Bucky nods numbly, “Rest of the week, yeah. They have to, there’s too much going on right now. It’s paid at least.”  

“Well that’s something.” Darcy concedes. “How are you getting home? It’s a madhouse out there.” 

“Paul’s gonna have me go out the back. I’ll be okay.” 

“Call me if you need me.” she insists, giving him another tight hug. 

Bucky promises he will and then follows the kindly old security guard through the maze of hospital halls and outside. 

The air is bitter cold and Bucky’s thankful for his heavy jacket as he hurries down the mostly empty streets home. Natasha is tapping away on her laptop when he arrives. She does cyber security work and swears she gets most of her work done after midnight anyway. It works out well when he needs help on his overnight shift rotations. 

“What happened?” she demands and slams the lid of her laptop down. 

Bucky shucks off his jacket and joins Natasha on the sofa. “Reporters showed up at the hospital, like a lot of them. Strange was on tonight, thank god, he’s a tough son of a bitch and he wasn’t putting up with crap from anyone. They snuck me out the back while the cops got rid of the reporters.” 

“But what about tomorrow? Is this gonna affect your job?” 

Bucky shrugs, trying to ignore the low level fear humming in his veins over that exact concern. “I honestly don’t know. HR is gonna call me tomorrow once they figure out ‘protocol’ for this. Somehow Strange got them to give me the rest of the week off with pay. I don’t even know what I’m going to do with myself for the next six days.” 

Natasha raises an eyebrow, surprised and happy for him. “I vote catching up on your Netflix queue and being a lazy ass. You never take a break, Bucky. And you of all people deserve one. Maybe go spend some more time with that gorgeous boyfriend of yours. Some kid-free time, if you know what I mean.” She wiggles her eyebrows until Bucky throws a pillow at her. She ducks easily, laughing. “I’m just saying! It’s been a long time since he-who-shall-not-be-named.” 

Bucky bristles at the mention of his ex. He should have seen Brock for the piece of shit he was, but he’d missed it at first, too wrapped up in the bliss of a new relationship. In the end, Brock’s true colors had come out and Bucky had ended things before it could become even more toxic than they already become. He sighs, pushing the ugly memories away. “It hasn’t been that long. And you’re forgetting Micah from the hospital cafe.” 

“It’s been four years since him. And Micah doesn’t count. That was a year ago and it didn’t go past a lunch date where he, and I quote, kissed you like a St. Bernard.” 

Bucky shudders at the memory. “Okay, so it’s been a while. Maybe I will go see Steve one day while Becca’s at school.” 

“That’s more like it!” Natasha cheers quietly, cautious to not disturb Becca. “So, do you want company or should I scoot and let you get some rest?” 

“I love you for offering but I just wanna crash. If I can get a few hours now I’ll be able to get back on daytime hours easier.” 

“Love you too.” Natasha leans over to hug him before packing up her stuff and heading out. 

It was a crazy day but as Bucky climbs into bed, he’s still resolved that it’s going to be okay again soon. 

Bucky is groggy when his alarm goes off at 7am but it’s better than he would have been if he hadn’t gotten any sleep. Becca is thrilled that he’s home and even more so when he tells her that he’ll be home the rest of the week. They make plans over breakfast for things they can do after she gets out of school since they have all the time in the world now. Bucky compromises with one quick park trip, which he cringes thinking about but he’ll just have to pack her inhaler and make sure she takes breaks, two trips to the library, and one night they’ll grab dinner at the neighborhood diner for their kids eat free night. 

The week flies by and Bucky gets the all clear on Thursday to return the following Sunday once the hospital is able to put additional security in place. He’s thankful they’re not just letting him go to avoid all the hassle but several nurses and doctors apparently made their opinions loud and clear that he was worth the additional security measures. Bucky is eternally grateful for his coworkers and makes plans to take in a tray of thank you brownies on his first shift back. 

A second round of good news comes in a few hours later; Steve is back early from his latest mission. They make plans for the following day, unwilling to wait any longer to see one another again. Steve will be, in theory, just hanging around the tower wrapping up some post-mission paperwork from earlier in the week so he’ll be able to take most of the day to show Bucky around the tower and spend time with him. He also offered to take them all to The Met after Becca gets out of school and Bucky said he’ll consider it. It’s a little extravagant, but something about picking her up together and going on an outing tugs at his heartstrings. It’s so perfectly domestic, like a real family would do. Bucky tries to ignore the longing he feels for something he’s never let himself consider before. 

There’s a lone reporter lingering outside his apartment when Bucky heads out to pick up Becca from school. There were a lot the first two days but their numbers dropped off drastically when they realized he really wasn’t all that interesting. “Hey man.” Bucky gives the reporter a little wave. He has to give the guy credit for determination. “Still not going to do anything interesting, sorry.” 

The reporter huffs a laugh, “Ya never know!” 

Bucky laughs in return and heads off, trying to ignore the fact that the man is following him a few steps back. He gives the guy a few more days before he gives up too. Bucky is a single parent with a full time job, he doesn’t have the time to do anything interesting. 

Rounding the corner to Becca’s school he spies the little girl talking to a man in a long beige wool coat. The man is tall and thin with greying hair and wire framed glasses. His appearance screams of wealth in a way that would make him fit right in as a parent of someone at the school, but something is off and Bucky steps up his pace. Becca hasn’t spotted him yet but he hears the man ask “Your daddy is friends with Captain America isn’t he?” 

Becca, all proud smiles, informs him, “He’s my brother, not my daddy. And Captain America is his boyfriend.” 

“Isn’t that nice. Hey, I have something you can give your brother for me, okay? Can you be a big helper? It’s right over here.” Becca looks unsure so the man smiles brightly and takes her hand, leading her down the sidewalk away from the school. A black van pulls up at the end of the block, a door swinging open and the man hurries her along. 

Bucky screams Becca’s name and breaks out into a full run. Icy fear consumes him, driving him to move faster than he ever has before. Please God no, please, don’t let them take my baby girl. 

The reporter realizes what’s going on and sprints right along with Bucky. They collide with the man and Becca at the same time. The reporter tackles the man, pinning him to the ground, leaving Bucky to grab Becca and roll to the ground shielding her in his arms. A teacher runs over with her phone out yelling “The police are on their way!” to them. 

The man writhes underneath the reporter, trying to free himself while looking panickedly at the van. The van door slides shut and then the vehicle flies off with screeching tires. Once it’s out of sight the man lays his head back on the pavement in defeat.

“Just stay put buddy.” the reporter grumbles. 

Now that Becca is safe Bucky is filled with a depth of rage he didn’t even realize he was capable of. Somebody tried to snatch his baby girl right in broad daylight. Bucky checks her over one more time before passing her off to the teacher who’s still holding on the line for 911. 

Bucky stalks over to where the reporter still has the man pinned. His movements are predatory, his voice low, practically a grow, when he demands, “Who the fuck do you think you are?” 

The reporter just stares at the man, also waiting for an answer. 

“I am one of many.”

Bucky shakes his head. God, he just wants to punch this guy in his smug face. “Fine. Who do you work for?” 

“Cut off one head and two more take its place.” 

“I’m getting real sick of riddles and I still got at least two minutes before the cops show. Last time, asshole. Who the fuck do you work for and why do you want my kid?”

“The child, or you, it matters not. Either will get us the captain. We are everywhere. We will come again, and we will succeed. Hail Hydra.” The man crunches down on something and within seconds he’s foaming at the mouth, his eyes rolling lifeless back in his head.

Bucky looks to Becca, thankful the teacher is shielding her away from what took place. Ice cold fear runs in his veins. He knew there could potentially be a risk dating Steve, but it was an abstract sort of knowledge. Up until minutes ago he’d thought the only real concern was pesky reporters. Most of which, he has to admit, are actually good people just trying to make a living. A real threat, a fucking terrorist threat, is something he’d never really put much thought into. That name too: Hydra. Everyone knows of the Nazi group who Captain America has been trying to destroy since the 40s. A threat from them is very, very real. 

The cops arrive and start dispersing the crowd that’s formed. It seems like forever until they’ve taken statements from everyone and the body is removed. Becca holds up as well as a four year old can trying to answer the police man’s questions, and Bucky fills in gaps as he can. They take his statement too and let him know they can provide a security detail if he wants. The officer looks sheepish but also recommends he call Steve because Shield and the Avengers can likely provide better security than the NYPD can. Bucky thanks the officer and agrees to call Steve as soon as possible. 

Becca is shaking so hard by the time they head home that Bucky scoops the little girl up to carry her the whole way. Two uniformed officers follow them back and do a full sweep of the apartment just to err on the side of caution. Buck appreciates the security but as he stands in his too quiet apartment he realizes he can’t do this every day. He adopted Becca to give her a better life and now he’s put her in more danger than she ever would have been in being raised by their parents. All because some small part of him still held on to the hope that there was someone out there that he could love and would love him back wholeheartedly and forever. That despite his upbringing, he could have a perfect family of his own one day. Bucky feels painfully childish that his pathetic longing for a partner had almost cost him his sister. 

Ever the responsible parent, Bucky stifles the emotions whirling in his chest and puts on a good front for Becca’s sake. She falls asleep halfway through Frozen II and Bucky doesn’t even bother trying to wake her. He knows there’s no fighting the adrenaline crash she’s feeling. His own crash will be equally brutal when it comes, but for now it’s still nowhere in sight. Bucky is too keyed up, restless and desperately trying to find a solution that keeps all of them safe and happy. He drags a cup of coffee and a blanket out onto the fire escape where he sits to watch the sun drop lower and lower among the roof tops. He’s almost finished his drink when a knock sounds on the door. 

The security detail is supposed to be vetting anyone going near his apartment so the odds are good it’s someone he knows, but it doesn’t stop him from slipping a kitchen knife into his hand on the way to the door. Peering through the peephole Bucky sees red hair, black leather, and a very pissed off Natasha. “Let me in.” she says, it sounds like a warning. 

Bucky opens the door and stands out of the way. It’s not worth arguing with Natasha when she gets like this. 

“You turned off your phone.” She comments without emotion. 

Bucky nods. “I don’t want to deal with it right now.” 

Natasha follows him as he heads to the kitchen to return the knife, seemingly pleased by his caution. “By it, you mean Steve.” 

“Amongst other things.” 

“You know I’m here for you. Whatever you need, just name it.” 

“That’s just it, I don’t know. I keep coming to the same answer and I hate it, Nat. I just… I can’t do this to Becs.” Bucky’s voice cracks on the little girl’s name and Natasha wraps her best friend into a tight hug. 

“You’ve gotta do what you’ve gotta do.” 

“I don’t even know how to do what I want to do. I’m sure it’s not nearly as easy as movies make it out to be.”

“Let me help. You and Becca mean the world to me. Whatever it is we’ll figure it out together.” 

Bucky sighs heavily, still leaning on Natasha. “We need to disappear.” 

Natasha goes still, “Are you sure?” 

“No. Yes. I don’t know. I can’t think of any other way to keep her safe. Even if I break up with Steve, Hydra can still use us as leverage. Feelings don’t just disappear... But people can.” 

“Okay. Give me four hours.” Natasha pulls back and starts texting rapidly on a small cell phone Bucky has never seen before. 

“What the fuck, Nat.” 

“Working in cyber security has some perks.” She shrugs. 

“I don’t think it’s normally supposed to have those kinds of perks.” 

“Well, it depends on who you’re keeping secure.” Nastaha’s smile is cheshire. 

“Damn. Okay, then. What do you need me to do?” 

“Stay put. I’d say try to get some sleep but I know you won’t. Pack a duffel bag for each of you. No more than that, I mean it. Think in terms of what you absolutely can’t leave behind, this is not packing for vacation. You can buy basic stupid shit when you get where you’re going. Two outfits and whatever else you can’t leave that fits in two duffels. Got it?” 

“Okay, got it.” 

“Oh, and your phone. You won’t be needing that anymore.” 

Bucky holds the phone out but doesn’t let go. “I have all of Becs’ baby pictures on there.” 

Natasha gives him an understanding smile. “I’ll move them all to an online cloud storage site. You won’t lose a single one.” 

Bucky releases the phone. “Thanks, Nat.” 

Natasha hugs him tightly again. “Four hours. Be ready.” 

And with that Bucky is left alone in his living room in shock. He supposes he shouldn’t be all that surprised. Natasha has always been a badass. He used to joke she was really a Russian spy and their friendship was just a cover for her real identity. Bucky now wonders now how close to the truth he might have been. 

Four hours later, down to the minute, Natasha is striding through his door once again, a large envelope tucked under her arm. There’s no warm welcome or pleasantries, Natasha has her game face on and Bucky is still too rattled to try for levity. Spreading the papers out on the coffee table Natasha organizes everything quickly. “Birth certificates, immigration paperwork, social security cards, school records, medical records, a resume with work history and references, and a quick life history fact sheet for both of you.” She places a wallet from her pocket onto the table as well, flipping it open quickly to show him it’s fully filled with cards, cash, and an ID card.

Bucky scans over the documents, unable to believe she had pulled this off so quickly and how real everything looked. “Sebastian Stan?” he asks, nose wrinkling. 

Natasha nods, “Yep, you’re Romanian. You moved here with your daughter Elena when she was two months old. Your wife died in childbirth and so you brought her here to start over.” 

He spies the address on the drivers license. “Rochester? Is that where we’re actually going?” 

“No, of course not. You and your daughter have recently moved to Cape Elizabeth, Maine. That’s where you’re headed. You’ll be happy to know their local urgent care center is looking for a new triage nurse. The pay is pretty good and it’ll be enough to cover rent for the cute little apartment that you just put a down payment on.” Natasha pulls something from her pocket, it’s flesh colored and rolled up tightly. She hands it over with a simple, “Here, you’ll need this too. Don’t want that guy drawing too much attention to you.” 

Bucky stares at the silicone sleeve, realizing it’s a perfect fit for his prosthetic. The details are down to an art, from light arm hairs and tiny freckles. It’s soft enough too that as long as you don’t grasp it very hard, it’ll feel shockingly similar to his right arm. “Damn. You don’t miss a thing, do you?”

“Of course not. Who do you think you’re dealing with?” Natasha glares at him affectionately.

Bucky chuckles, of course she’s the best at this. She’s been the best at everything since the day they met. “What happens to Bucky and Becca Barnes then?” he’s afraid to ask but he needs to know.

“They got on a flight to Moscow two hours ago. There’s a few nice security officers and cab drivers who will all verify they were sighted leaving the airport about eight hours from now.” 

“That works for the rest of the world, but what happens if Steve goes looking? He has an awful lot of friends in high places.” 

“Steve isn’t going to go looking right now. And even if he did, the alibi will hold up. Trust me.” 

A tiny piece of Bucky’s heart shatters that Steve would just let him go so easily. 

Natasha recognizes the look on his face and quickly adds, “He called you non stop after the news broke. Sent you dozens of texts too. You very nearly had the full force of SHIELD and the Avengers on your doorstep if it wasn’t for Tony Stark.” 

“What happened?” 

“Tony convinced Steve that if you weren’t calling or responding that he was as good as dumped. The rumor mill always hinted their relationship was strained but Tony really is good at kicking Steve when he’s down and Tony played his cards right on this one. Steve has been holed up in his apartment all night, he’s not doing too great.” 

It kills Bucky to know he’s putting Steve through this pain, but he’s firm in his decision. He’d be more disappointed in himself but he’s too tired. Things got tough and he’s doing exactly what he’s been doing since he was a kid to protect himself: he’s running. “How do you even know all this?” Bucky asks, realizing Natasha shouldn’t have this level of detail on the goings on at the tower. 

“I hacked into the security feed at Avengers Tower. Jarivs was a handful but not more than I could handle. Tony Stark is brilliant but he’s also arrogant, and that’s his downfall.” 

“You are, without a doubt, the scariest person I’ve ever met. I’m gonna miss you.” Bucky can’t hold back the tears at the thought of leaving Natasha behind. 

“What do you mean, miss me? You went to college with Natalie Rushman, you’re even Instagram friends. You haven’t seen me in a few years but we still keep in touch regularly.” Natasha brings out yet another little black phone he’s never seen and shows him Natalie’s Instagram account. 

“How many of those little phones do you have tucked up your sleeve?” he teases.

“The world will never know.” she quips in return. “I do need to go though.” she adds in a more serious tone.

Bucky nods, he knew this was coming. He can’t get words past the lump in his throat.

“You have a train to catch in about forty minutes. That one will take you as far as Boston and there’s more tickets from there. Try and get some rest, you’ll be getting into town in Maine around eight in the morning.” 

“I’ve gone longer without sleep pulling doubles at the hospital, this won’t be nearly as bad.” 

Natasha gives him a half hearted smile, “You’re all set then.” 

Bucky pulls her in for one last hug. “I’ll message Natalie when we arrive.” 

“Mmm, yes. Sebastian would definitely snap a pic of his new hometown when he arrives. I’ve heard it’s very Insta-worthy.” Tears shine in Natasha’s eyes but they don’t fall. She swallows thickly. “Be safe.” 

“You too.” Bucky manages to croak out through the overwhelming tide of emotions. He holds her for one last heartbeat before she slips out the door like a ghost. 

Bucky goes through all the documents Natasha left behind and finds a thin red iPhone in the stack. There’s a post-it note stuck on top warning “do not activate until after you are on the second train”. So much for keeping himself occupied while he waits. In the end he spends most of the time pacing around the apartment and double checking his bags. He checks the time again, making sure he’s down to the final few minutes when he finally goes to get a sleeping Becca from her bed. She barely stirs as he carefully slides her into her warm purple jacket and slips socks and shoes on her feet. He slings her over his shoulder and collects the two duffels with his free hand. It’s a little jarring to see tan skin where he’s used to seeing shiny steel but he appreciates that Natasha thought of everything. 

“Hey sweet girl, take a minute.” he says quietly, rubbing a hand along her back soothingly. 

“Where are we?” she asks, looking around.

“We’re on a train, it just stopped in Boston. This is where we’re getting off. I promise you I’ll explain everything once we’re on the next train but I need you to do two things for me, okay?” he waits until she nods before continuing, “Okay, good. I need you to stay real close to me and don’t use our names. Can you do that?” 

Becca scrunches her nose in a confused expression Bucky knows she gets from him. “Okay?” 

“We’ll be on the next train soon, promise. Just be a big girl and hang on ‘til we get there.” The attendant comes through to let them know they can exit the train and Bucky stands up to once again juggle a sleepy four year old and two duffel bags. Becca is thankfully more cooperative now that she’s awake, holding onto him and making the whole ordeal much easier. They have just enough time to use the bathrooms and buy some snacks and a picture book on Boston to keep Becca occupied on the next leg of their trip. 

On their next train, from Boston to Portland, Bucky finds they once again have a whole compartment to themselves. He wonders how Natasha manages to pull off this kind of stuff but figures it’s better not to think too hard on it. Becca is happily munching through a pack of teddy grahams while Bucky gets them settled in. Not a great breakfast, but it’ll tide them over until they get to Maine. He cracks open his can of cold brew coffee and tears into his own pack of teddy grahams. Kid snack or not, they’re freaking delicious. 

“Bu... uh…” Becca starts to say his name but catches herself. 

“Good girl, bug.” praises the little girl. “What’s up?”

Becca looks around unsure before quietly asking, “Why can’t we use our names?” 

It’s a simple question, one he knew was going to come up sooner rather than later, and he’d spent a good portion of the first train ride figuring out how he’d explain this to her. “Well, those aren’t our names anymore.” he starts simply. 

“What? Why?”

“Because we’re moving far away where those bad guys from yesterday can’t find us. I need to keep us safe and this is the way it needs to happen. New names, new apartment, new school, new everything. It’s going to be really nice and I promise you’ll love where we’re going.” He hopes.

Tears well for a moment, “What about Auntie Nat and Uncle Clint and Steve?” 

“They’re staying in New York but we’ll still talk to Auntie Nat sometimes, okay?”

“What about Steve? You liked him. I liked him. Why can’t he come?” 

Bucky sighs, he won’t throw Steve under the bus for this. “Steve has a really important job in New York so he needs to stay there.” 

“I’m gonna miss home.” Becca grumbles sadly. Bucky pulls her onto his lap to hold her close.

“I know, I am too. But we’re gonna have a great new home. Want to know your new name?” he tries for a distraction. 

“Sure!” Becca takes the bait. 

“Your name is Elena Stan. My name is Sebastian Stan.” 

“Seb-bast-tan?” Becca tries his name out slowly.

“Close enough. But you know how you asked if you could call me daddy when you were little?” 

Becca nods. That had been a rough phase for both of them. She had wanted to call him daddy so badly but it had made him uncomfortable at the time so he insisted she call him by his name. 

“Well, now you can. In our new lives Sebastian is Elena’s daddy.”  Part of him still dislikes that the effort he put into making sure Becca knows her own identity has flown out the window overnight. When she gets older he hopes she’ll understand why he’s doing this. “It’s gonna be hard to remember at first, but we’ll get used to it.” 

“Okay.” Becca shrugs and goes back to her snack, her curiosity sated for the time being. 

Bucky settles in, starting to feel the weight of the previous day pressing down on him. He prays the coffee kicks in soon so he’s not a zombie by the time they get where they’re going. Becca seems happy enough keeping herself occupied with her new book and he makes plans to buy a few toys once they get to the next stop. Just a few things that will keep her busy at their new place so he can catch a quick nap. He doesn’t know what their financial situation is but he can’t imagine Natasha wouldn’t have moved over his money for him. There had been two hundred in cash in the wallet so that will at least tide them over until he can check the card balances. He’s lucky Becca is an easy kid and he just hopes that she’ll take this all in stride like she does most things. And if not, well she’s a four year old, distractions and redirections still work at this age thankfully. 

The second train ride is half the time of the first but Bucky is starting to feel worn out and grimy. The last leg of their trip is a twenty minute bus ride from Portland to Cape Elizabeth and once again they have just enough time to use the bathroom and hit up a train station gift shop. He buys a plastic tea set, a stuffed ladybug, and breakfast sandwiches before they have to race over to catch their bus. Becca is more awake now and she’s keeping up on her own, hugging the ladybug for dear life while she settles into their bus seats. 

Maine is different than Bucky expected, colder sure, but the water even looks different than back in New York even though both places connect to the Atlantic Ocean. There’s something about the clear, turbulent water that seems more powerful and deeply elemental than the easy going tides back in Brooklyn. Bucky’s captivated watching the ocean out the bus window while the old Greyhound travels down the coastal highway. After two long train rides, the bus ride feels like it’s over in a blink of an eye. The bus stop they’re let out at is small, barely more than a little hut alongside the road outside of town. 

Becca is full of wide eyed curiosity as they make their way into town. Bucky has the address of the apartment, but with no clue of the little town’s set up it’s not very useful. He misses his phone and being able to GPS his way around. It’s a few minutes later that he remembers the phone in the package Natasha gave him. He’d forgotten about it in his sleep deprived state, having stashed it in his bag since he wasn’t able to use it until after the first leg of the trip. Booting up the sleek red iPhone, Bucky’s relieved to see it has a full charge and it finds a GPS signal quickly. The apartment is only a fifteen minute walk away at that point and Bucky happily tells Becca they’ll be home soon. She nods but she’s clearly distracted by her new surroundings. 

The little seaside town is quaint and reminds Bucky of something out of a movie. Small brick and glass fronted shops line the town’s main street, brightly colored banners and awnings announcing the businesses inside. There are a lot of artisan shops and Bucky finds himself looking forward to exploring the town more when they have time. The first priority though is getting settled in. Becca is tired and starting to whine a little by the time they turn onto their street. It’s as picturesque as the rest of town, tree lined sidewalks and charming old brick homes. Finding their house number, Bucky pauses outside, not entirely sure how to proceed. Natasha hadn’t given him a key, just an address. He’s still standing there, thinking out his next moves when an older woman pops her head out the front door. 

“Are you Sebastian?” the woman calls out with a smile. 

“Yes, I am.” Bucky replies easily, the new name less foreign than he had expected it to feel. 

“I’m Anne, from the emails. You two made good time getting up here. Come on in and I’ll get you set up.” The woman stands back from the doorway letting them through and Bucky is thankful Natasha set things up so thoroughly for them. 

Anne, as it turns out, grew up in the large Victorian style home before she and her sisters renovated it back in the 70s and turned it into apartments. She still lives in the bottom floor apartment but rents out the second and third floors now that her sisters both passed on. She’s chatty and grandmotherly, doting on Becca by plying the little girl with blueberry cake. Becca doesn’t bat an eye at being called Elena and Bucky couldn’t be more proud of his girl. 

“You both must be exhausted from the trip.” Anne says after Bucky has finished signing all the paperwork for the apartment. “If you need anything, I’m here. Like I said in the email, it’s fully furnished but if you would rather bring in your own things just let me know and I’ll move the existing pieces into storage. It’ll at least get you started though.” 

Bucky stifles his yawn but nods, “Yeah, I think we’re both due for a nap. I’m sure what’s there is fine, we’re not super picky.” 

Anne gives him a smile and shows him outside to the stairs that lead up to his apartment. Bucky thanks her again and makes his way up the narrow wooden stairs. After the long trip and lack of sleep the stairs feel like Everest and a grumbling Becca clearly agrees. The door is cheerfully decorated with a sunflower wreath and the apartment inside is instantly welcoming. The living room has a little tile entryway where they shuck off their shoes before padding across the fluffy beige carpeting. The dining room is off to one side after the hallway, connecting to the kitchen which is brightly decorated in white and yellow. The hallway leads to two bedrooms, and a bathroom decorated with beautiful tiles reminiscent of mermaid scales. Becca falls in love immediately and begs Bucky for a bath. He promises her one that night once they can buy soap and things at the store which seems to appease her for the moment. The bedrooms are both decorated in the same neutral colors as the rest of the house and Bucky thinks it’ll be easy to add a few homey touches to the place to make it feel more like theirs. 

Becca throws herself on the twin size bed in the first bedroom announcing it’s the best big girl bed ever. Though she slept well and hasn’t needed a nap in ages, she agrees to lay down for a little while to rest. There’s a small play table and dresser off to the side and Bucky sets her new toys down on the table. He makes Becca promise to come get him right next door if she needs him and gives her a coloring book and box of crayons if she’d rather draw quietly too. Seeing her favorite coloring book from home cheers her up a bit but she still burrows happily under the fluffy comforter. Bucky gives her a quick kiss and heads over to his room at the end of the hall. It’s larger than his bedroom back in Brooklyn and the bed is larger too. He’d been fine with his old full sized mattress but seeing the king sized behemoth has him throwing himself on the bed much like Becca had done in hers. Bucky lets out a groan, this is a real adult bed. The grey duvet is impossibly soft and fluffy and the mattress itself lets him sink into it, unlike the spring mattress he was used to. Bucky is in love with the bed and allows himself a few happy moments to roll around in it. 

Eventually, needing to be responsible, Bucky gets up to change out of his clothes and shed the grime and stress from the past day away. He grabs the phone and takes a picture of the bed with it’s now rumpled comforter and shoots an Instagram message to Natalie with the caption “Now THIS is a bed”. 

Bucky sets the phone down on the nightstand and takes a minute to enjoy the view from the bedroom window. The view is so different from New York and he knows it’ll take some getting used to. The phone chirps an unfamiliar noise and Bucky sees that Natasha responded already. “Jealous! Enjoy your nap. TTYL.” 

Bucky sends back a heart emoji and then sets the phone on the nightstand so he can crawl under the covers into his new bed. It’s been a long 24 hours but at least the hardest part is behind him. 

What was meant to be a short nap turns into three hours of Bucky being dead to the world. He wakes up a little after noon to find Becca coloring happily at her play table. She also figured out how to use the remote for the little TV on top of her dresser and turned on the Disney channel quietly in the background. Bucky shakes his head, the little girl is too smart for her own good. “Hey bug.” he calls from the doorway. 

“Hi!” Becca’s whole face lights up when she sees him, “Wanna see what I colored?” She holds up her book and Bucky joins her at the tiny table. She couldn’t have been up for very long, she’s only gotten halfway through one Cinderella picture so far, which she proudly shows him she only colored outside the lines once. 

Bucky lets her get back to her artwork and wanders down the hall to explore the apartment more. It’s crazy to him that for a third of the rent of his apartment in Brooklyn he has more than twice as much space here. There’s even a backyard down below with a patio area and a fire pit. The apartment has tall, wide windows in every room which let in ample natural light through gauzy curtains. Bucky looks out the kitchen window down at the backyard and wonders what Becca will think of making s’mores. He finds a shopping list note pad and pen on the fridge and starts making a list of things they’ll need to pick up at the store. The kitchen is fully stocked with plates, cups, pots and pans, and miscellaneous cooking and baking supplies. It makes Bucky look forward to whipping up meals, no longer having to rely on the cramped little kitchen with a temperamental stove they had in their old place. The appliances are all shiny steel and new looking, the flat top stove making Bucky grin from ear to ear. 

Sitting in the corner of one counter top is a french press with a bag of local coffee and a wrapped loaf of blueberry cake. There’s a little welcome card next to the treats and Bucky plans to thank Anne again when he asks for directions to the grocery store. He wanders down the hall, adding toiletries to the shopping list as well as laundry detergent and dryer sheets when he discovers the hallway closet houses a stacked washer / dryer unit. There isn’t a whole lot more that they’ll need for the time being and Bucky figures if he budgets correctly he should be able to keep them afloat for a little while until he can get a steady paycheck again. That is if Natasha moved all of his money over for him. 

Bucky frowns, suddenly worrying that he’s making plans without even checking their financial state. He retrieves his phone and flicks through the screens until he finds a banking app that matches the debit card in his wallet. The app loads and brings him to a home screen that displays four different accounts. Bucky’s head is swimming as he looks at the accounts and numbers. Checking, Savings, College Fund, Car Fund. The college fund has enough to set Becca up at a decent state school or even private school if she can get scholarships. The car fund has enough for a low end new car or nicer used model. Savings has four times what he’d had in savings back home and the checking account contains about what he’d had in savings. Where in the hell did Natasha get all that money?! 

Hopping into Instagram, Bucky fires off a message to Natasha loaded with shocked emojis and exclamation points. “I can’t accept all this.” Is the second message. 

The three little ellipses pop up almost immediately. “You can, and will. Happy housewarming.” 

Bucky frowns and types out, “Where did it come from?” 

“Let’s just say some less than savory sources who won’t even miss it.” Natasha sends back.

The frown on Bucky’s face deepens. He wonders how deep Natasha has gotten herself into with this mystery life she’s apparently been leading. He hopes she knows what she’s doing. “I guess I just have to say thanks and trust you.” he finally replies.

Natasha sends back a few grinning emojis and a kiss. 

It’s not ideal but Bucky can’t exactly return the money at this point. And living in a more rural area he’ll need a car sooner rather than later. He hasn’t driven in years but it should be just like riding a bike, not something you ever really forget. They still have a full day ahead of them and grocery shopping without a car to haul it all back is going to suck, so Bucky decides that lunch and car shopping can be their first stops. 

“Hey Bec… uh….bug.” Bucky quickly corrects himself. 

Becca giggles at his slip up. “Yes daddy?” she asks in her sweetest tone, emphasizing that she didn’t slip. 

“How about we go find some place for lunch and then run errands?” 

“Lunch out?!”

“Yep, lunch out at a restaurant. Come on, let’s go ask Miss Anne where the good food is.” 

Becca flies out of her room to put on her shoes, getting both on before Bucky’s even gotten his first boot tied. He scolds her lightly as she bounds down the stairs, sounding more like a herd of elephants than a little girl. 

It’s loud enough that Anne comes to the window of her living room to greet them. “All rested up?”

“Much better, yes. Thank you for the cake and coffee, that was really nice.” Bucky says as he tries to keep Becca close despite her best efforts to keep going. “Would you by chance be able to give me some pointers for places to go around here? We need to run errands.” 

“Of course, it depends on what you need though.” 

“Well, lunch to start. And a car. Then groceries and some basic necessities.” 

Anne thinks a moment, “Go down two blocks and make a left, head for the docks. There’s a diner called Jerry’s. Everyone loves it there. For a car your best bet is to catch a taxi over to All Star Service. It’s on the other end of town. Mark takes good care of the cars and he’ll get you set up nicely. If you get a car, or can catch another taxi, head over to the strip mall near there. It’s called Oakwood Plaza and they have a grocery store and a few other little shops where you can find everything you’d need. Otherwise you’ll have to head out of town to the Target over in South Portland.”

Buck is frantically writing all of her advice down on the back of his shopping list, not having expected such a wealth of information but immensely grateful for it. “Thank you, really. It’s going to take a bit for us to get used to where everything’s at.” 

“Not a problem, dear. You’ll get acclimated in no time, I’m sure.” 

Bucky thanks her again and then finally lets Becca lead him down the sidewalk. He lets her go ahead, a happy bounce in her step, giving her directions when they need to make a turn. The diner comes into view a short distance later and Bucky hopes they end up liking the place since it’s so close by. 

A waitress seats them right away in a faded red and white booth. Becca is looking around at the retro decor like she can’t see it all fast enough. Bucky makes small talk with the waitress once she discovers they’re new to town, following her recommendation on some local fare. She doesn’t steer them wrong and both Bucky and Becca are thrilled with their lunches. 

“I like it here a LOT.” Becca announces, setting her spoon down into her empty bowl of baked beans. The little dish had been full of beans and cut up hot dogs which had made Becca’s day for some reason. Bucky wasn’t going to question it, it was a hit. His own chowder and Italian sandwich were both delicious and he already plans to come back and try the lobster roll another day. Maybe they can make weekly trips together now that they won’t be scraping by quite as hard as they were. 

Bucky mentions needing a car to the waitress and she recommends the same place Anne had, so he pays for a taxi ride across town to see if he can find something. He doesn’t really care too much what he gets as long as it’s reliable and within his budget. Becca doesn’t seem to understand why on earth he needs a car despite him explaining a few times it’s different here than living in a big city. The taxi driver has a good chuckle and offers to wait if they want, just in case they don’t find anything. Bucky thanks the man and tells him he’ll be back in a few minutes to let him know one way or another. 

The lot isn’t huge and Bucky moves through the few dozen cars pretty quickly. A dark green Jeep catches his eye and he can’t help but be drawn to it. It was his dream car when he was a teenager. It’s not a difficult decision. The Jeep is only five years old, the mileage is pretty low, and best of all the price leaves a few thousand in that savings account once it’s all said and done. Bucky doesn’t need to think it over so he lets the taxi driver know they’ll be fine and heads off to find the shop owner. He finds the man, Mark, under the hood of an old beat up pick up truck covered in oil but with a wide smile on his face. A quick test drive and a few forms later, Bucky is the proud owner of his first car. It’s a far cry from driving around his parent’s beat up old Lincoln Continental when he was a teenager. Becca is thrilled at the idea and is barely able to sit still as Bucky secures her in the back seat. He realizes his next stop has to be for a car seat, the last thing he needs is to have his new ID tested out by the Cape Elizabeth police.

The strip mall is barely a mile down from the auto shop and thankfully has a thrift shop at the end opposite the grocery store. It’s a huge shop run by the local church and has everything from clothes, to home goods, and toys. Bucky picks up a few new outfits for each of them and finds a gently used booster seat as well. Impulsively he throws in a few toys and books for Becca and some candles and house decorations. With that taken care of, he runs an overly excited Becca through the grocery store, not even bothering to protest when she makes a few special requests. Bucky can’t get over how inexpensive the prices are compared to the city, especially the seafood. He takes note of prices, wanting to be able to budget out their shopping the next time. It’s nice to be able to just shop for what they want for a change, but old habits die hard and he can’t just do that every time. 

It’s late afternoon when they get back, arms loaded with bags. Becca insists on carrying some bags upstairs herself and together they get it all in three trips. Bucky lets Becca run off to her room to set up her new toys while he puts away the groceries and sets up the few house decorations he bought. There’s something extremely soothing about getting everything set up to look like a real home. Their home. It’s far nicer than the little apartment they shared in the city and for a bleak moment Bucky wonders if staying in the city after he adopted Becca had been the right call. He pushes the thought out of his head as quickly as it arises, shoving the laundry in the dryer with a little more force than necessary. He had done his best for the both of them, and he would have never managed to get his nursing career started without having Natasha and Clint around to help with childcare. 

By dinner time both he and Becca are worn out but they’re fully moved in and the apartment is even starting to feel more homey. Despite his better judgment, Bucky orders them a pizza for dinner. Becca is shocked and Bucky assures her this won’t be an everyday occurrence. They curl up together on the plush sofa after dinner, finding an old movie to watch together until Becca is sleeping peacefully nestled against Bucky’s side. He picks up the little girl, toting her off into her own bed. The room is perfect for her, but Bucky thinks he might want to get her a new bedding set for her birthday in a few months. One that suits her better like the ladybug print one she had in Brooklyn. 

Becca never goes back to calling him Bucky, the label of daddy sticks whether Bucky likes it or not. She tells him one night, after he reminds her for the millionth time she can call him Bucky, that she knows but he takes care of her and loves her like daddies do and she really wants to keep calling him that. Bucky’s still not 100% about it but he caves in, knowing it means a lot to his little girl. 

Steve retires and moves up to Cape Elizabeth within a week of their visit. He was very serious about hanging up the shield both literally and metaphorically. He buys a sweet old victorian house with a big backyard to fix up a few blocks from Bucky’s apartment and hangs his shield on the living room wall, resigned to home decor instead of a weapon. 

It takes Steve almost six months to complete renovating and upgrading the house, just enough time for him to talk himself into buying a ring and proposing to Bucky. The big old house had always been meant for the three of them, even before Steve fully realized it.

Steve and Bucky get married in their backyard that June, both men stunning in white suits and Becca in a sweet lilac dress. It’s a quiet, simple, ceremony with all their local and far away friends coming together to celebrate. 

Bucky gives Steve the paperwork to officially adopt Becca and share custody with him as their wedding gift. Steve cries, overwhelmed by emotion, at the gift and then (much to his embarrassment) periodically throughout the night when it hits him all over again. 

Clint catches the garter and Natasha catches the bouquet. Steve and Bucky swear it wasn’t planned. Clint, finding some inner strength after all these years, grabs Natasha and kisses her right in front of everyone. It’s unclear who’s more embarrassed as the group claps and cheers when they break apart, but the pair disappears after that and isn’t seen again until brunch the next morning. 

Becca starts kindergarten that fall, proudly heading into school holding hands with both her daddy and her papa. Bucky and Steve couldn’t be happier for their little girl and how well she’s adjusted to small town life. They celebrate by finally letting her pick out a guinea pig.