#panda hate

(from @biologizeable​ !! the original panda hater, thanks friend)

lmao ok in actuality though.

PANDAS. millions of dollars have been donated to panda conservation efforts. millions. you know what good pandas do? jack shit.

pandas are lazy animals who eat basically 1 thing, need to eat a shit ton of it, and they don’t fucking fuck. they won’t reproduce!!! that’s why conservation efforts aren’t working well/at all!!! the pandas wont fucking fuck each other what kind of instinct is that

you see, with us humans and our fancy technology and world-crushing power, we can sometimes accidentally put wildlife under that big powerful opposable thumb driven boot of ours. pandas are... sort of one of the many species now under watch lists because we’ve harmed their populations.

however, natural selection will still take place no matter if humans are present or not.

that’s right. guess what!!! living off 1 thing, being lazy, and not reproducing are pretty shitty ways of surviving in the natural world. ever heard of survival of the fittest? pandas aren’t the fittest. not even close. no matter if humans are present or not, the natural world is still a harsh one where death happens often and must be accepted in order for change to occur. but oh, human compassion.  although so well intended, gets in the way of logic.

LOGIC says we should primarily help species that 1. are mostly successful  in their niche, and 2. are actually positively impacted by conservation measures.

but our dumbass COMPASSION gets in the way and says, “hold up. no. pandas are cuter than, say, bees, which by the way if THOSE numbers’ drop the lives of so many animals will be put at risk and huuuge changes will have to be made and society will be completely unable to function as it did before, BUT pandas are cuter than bees. so pandas win. pandas get the money. and for conservation measures, money is everything.

now, of goddamn course, there’s a political side to this. China’s national animal is the giant panda. so China wouldn’t be too happy to hear of their extinction. however, there are many solutions to this!!! 1. keep pandas alive in zoos. they’re not gonna survive in the wild. pls stop that. 2. they could have an extinct animal as their national animal!!! its not unheard of!!! ireland has a fucking unicorn as their national animal and those never existed as far as science says. who cares if urs is extinct. 3. just.. suck it up, accept that pandas suck at life, and get a different national animal? there’s so many. pandas arent even good role models. it’d be cool. a historical thing. many countries have multiple national animals. 4. theres lots of stuff u could put here. u get my gist. i get that i’m not a political leader. i don’t know how China feels about these options. but again, logic vs. compassion.

so while i don’t hate pandas, i hate how people treat them, just because they’re goddamn cute. they are not fit to survive in their environment, conservation attempts have been made and are not very successful, pandas will not reproduce, and there are much much much more impactful and important species that should take a high priority over pandas. so, i blame the pandas, and human population.