Managed to do a 50-minute run at 10 kph / 6 mph.
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Managed to do a 50-minute run at 10 kph / 6 mph.

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Alright, after six months of exercise and, well, not exactly “dieting” but logging my calorie intake, the results are in.
January 1st: 94.25 kg / 208 lbs.
June 30th: 78.6 kg / 173 lbs.
I didn’t change my eating habits outside of eating less after dinner - still ate chocolate, red meat, pasta and other high-carb foods, etc. - and the exercise was literally just cardio - I incline-walked or jogged on a treadmill for an hour three or so times a week. (Let that be a lesson to everyone that the only fundamental thing you need to lose weight is a consistent calorie deficit. Nobody needs to starve themselves with low-calorie diets to drop weight: your body needs about 1300 to 1500 calories a day for its baseline function anyway, my average daily calorie intake over those six months was 1885, fluctuating from as low as 1300 to as high as 2450.)
So I accomplished my six-month goal (drop below 90 kg) in March, my New Year’s Resolution (fit into a pair of 34″ pants) in April, and my ultra-hopeful goal of dropping below 80 kg (which was really only ever a “back of the mind” thing for if everything went better than expected) early this month. Hooray for progress!
Goal for the next six months: get some mussels muscles. Not douchebag Muscle Beach muscles, but like lean muscles or at least some definition. I dunno what the terminology is, I’m essentially starting from scratch.